


Rage and Glory

by prettygirllostt



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Best Friend Dorian, Dorian/Krem kind of, Dragon! AU, F/M, I have a hard time tagging these things, M/M, Modern AU, Slow Burn, a love story mostly, as in they have dragons and ride them, but with plot, sassy Josephine sees everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-20
Updated: 2017-08-01
Packaged: 2018-12-04 18:47:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 92,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11561166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prettygirllostt/pseuds/prettygirllostt
Summary: Ursa Lavellan is an egg guard for the Dalish dragon Keep. When a meeting is called between the feral dragons and their tame brethren, Ursa is called to protect the egg that could save the world. The Conclave is destroyed, leaving only Ursa and the egg alive. Ursa is soon dragged into a war. She stands in the middle with the Inquisition and finds herself the head of a revolution. Along with the dragonling that was born from the egg she fights to do what is right with the help of our favorite Dragon Age cast.





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> For some reason when posting new work it won't allow me to link this to the series it belongs to, but a few years ago I wrote a Dragon!AU for Sherlock. In this world dragons were common place and people attended public (and private) hatchings in the hopes to bond with a dragon. Dragons spoke in their rider's minds in different colors and were soul bound to their rider. I decided this would be a fun world to put the dragon age: inquisition characters. This story is based in modern Scotland though I'm still using game names and places. This follows the basic plot of inquisition but is by no means sticking to the script. 
> 
> This work is unbeta'd so any mistakes are my own. I do not own any of the characters from this franchise. Explicit for later chapters. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Chapter 1

 

URSA Lavellen was simply a grunt worker. Someone hired from a small town in the Dalish fields to help clean and protect the nests of the dragons in the Dalish Rage (A Rage being a group of dragons belonging to the same family group. When a group of families that linked to one another met, it was called a Glory). She worked in the far off Keep, one many miles in the hills. It was carved deeply into the mountains. There wasn’t much light to be seen and because of this, when Ursa sat with the eggs in the bright sun room her cheeks sprouted freckles. She was used to the darkness though and was settled in her routine. 

 

When the notice came for a meeting the dragons and their riders were overjoyed. For many years the dragons of the Dalish lands in the high North of Scotland had fought the feral clans. The Rages of the feral clans were powerful, tied into a deep magic they called the Fade. They claimed it came from a lack of humanity and they fought against the taming of their kind across the globe. A call for a meeting could mean an end to the bitter war the Rages had been fighting for over 100 years. 

 

Ursa was chosen to travel with the heads of the Rage to guard the egg that had been requested. A respite in the war had appeared in the form of a single egg. A single dragonling to be born both feral and tamed. It was the one hope the dragons and riders carried and Ursa was chosen to protect it in its travels. 

 

“I still don’t see why they chose me,” she muttered to her roommate Sera as she packed. Both looked of Dalish descent. Slightly pointed ears and slim builds. Ursa curved more at the waist and her face was softer, betraying herself to be the grandchild of a city dweller. She had the breasts to match her softer lines and it added an angle to her waist that many women envied. She’d grown used to the heated stares of men but worried that outside of her home she would seem even more exotic. She didn’t enjoy public attention so the idea made her shiver. 

 

Sera shrugged. “It’s a chance to get away from this place. I’d give your right arm for that chance.” 

 

“My right arm?” Ursa laughed as she shoved clothes into her bag. She checked her phone for the fifth time, hoping her friend Dorian at the Tevinter Keep  would tell her if he was going to the meeting or not.  She hadn’t seen him in months and she missed his easy and fun way of looking at life. 

 

“Well I don’t want to sacrifice my own arm! I need it,” Sera said as if that made complete sense. Ursa laughed again and sighed when her phone yielded no results. 

 

“Relax. Everyone will love you. They always do. You don’t need Dorian,” Sera said more quietly. She saw what Ursa didn’t. Ursa was beautiful and when she smiled people responded in kind. Sera didn’t have that kind of expression and she was jealous of it in her friend. It bothered her to no end that Ursa couldn’t see it. It wasn’t just her face or her body, it was how she spoke. How she carried herself. And when she smiled, it seemed to shine out from behind her teeth. 

 

“I know I don’t,” Ursa said defensively. 

 

Sera rolled her eyes but went back to her phone, no doubt scamming some poor sod out of his life savings in poker. 

 

“He’s probably not going. He’s just a rider. They aren’t sending just anyone to the Conclave. Red Jenny heard them talking. Something about the up and ups. You know, the snooty ones. They’re the ones going. You’re just going to keep the egg shiny. Or whatever it is you do,” Sera snorted. 

 

Ursa sighed once more as she finished packing. “I guess I’ll find out.” 

 

___

 

THE world was dark and smoky. Someone was pushing her and she fought to run while holding the heavy object in her hands. 

 

“Go! Run! Go while you can!” the voice urged so Ursa did. She ran until she couldn’t anymore. She ran until she stumbled. She ran until the thing in her arms gave out a loud crack! And she was thrown onto her back. She couldn’t see and it was with one long groan that she fell into darkness. 

 

___

 

“She has the egg! How could it not be her?” a furious female voice cried from above her. Ursa groaned as the sound vibrated through her skull and added to the ache already blooming across her forehead. 

 

“Patience, Cassandra!” A sharper voice chided, “We must speak with her first. We don’t know what happened.” 

 

“I do! She set off a dragon fire bomb! She killed Justinia! She left the Glory in shambles and now the egg won’t budge from her hands. She has ruined all our chances at peace,” the first voice, Cassandra, shot back. 

 

There was a long sigh as Ursa tried to pry her eyes open. Her eyelids felt heavy, her mouth as if it was filled with cotton and her limbs were slow. Something was clutched in her hands and with a final groan, she managed to focus her eyes on the two women in front of her. 

 

She blinked as she studied them. “You’re Cassandra Pentaghast. You’re the dragon seeker. You work for the Glory….where am I?”

 

“You’re at Haven. Or rather, outside of it,” the other woman replied. Ursa shifted her gaze and felt her mouth gape open once more. 

 

“You’re Leliana...Justinia’s left hand. Why….?” Ursa looked around blurrily before peering down at the egg in her hands. It was a bright green and it shimmered in the dim light of the cell they’d dropped her in. It seemed stuck to her palms. She tried to release it only to feel a sharp pain in her head. She hissed and squeezed her eyes shut. “Fuck,” she breathed. 

 

“You are the only living soul left,” Cassandra said gravely. She leaned in close to Ursa, the smell of her sweat causing Ursa to turn her head. Cassandra smelled like anger. For a moment a flash of red and green danced across Ursa’s mind and she flinched. 

 

“Left of what?” Ursa asked quietly. Shifting her weight, she could feel her cell phone in her back pocket but her hands were tied and the egg seemed to be stuck to her so she couldn’t reach it. She longed to check it. To ask Sera what the hell was happening. To text Dorian so he could playfully remind her of what was important. 

 

Cassandra wrenched Ursa’s chin up as Leliana watched. “The Conclave. It’s destroyed. Everyone who was there is dead.” 

 

There was a moment of deathly silence then, for the second time that day, Ursa blacked out. 

 

___

 

URSA woke once more to the darkness of the cell. She hadn’t thought any Keeps still used their cells. It seemed barbaric in this day and age. She wasn’t alone but Leliana was reading off of a charred piece of paper, giving Ursa time to look at her surroundings. She was in a dark basement and her hands were bound. It didn’t seem to matter, as the egg had her hands firmly stuck to its sides. There was a long crack along the top and she felt a spurt of panic. The egg was meant to hatch at the Conclave. She’d shined it until it would glow even in the pitch dark and it seems she’d also carried it from the wreckage. Now it wouldn’t leave her. She pursed her lips at the crack and lifted the egg closer to her face. If the dragonling inside was dead it would be oozing but she could see no liquid. It didn’t smell sour as she inhaled and she breathed a small sigh of relief. The dragonling inside was still alive. 

 

“I don’t believe you killed them. You were found with your I.D. You worked for the Rage. You’re an egg hatcher. Why would you destroy such powerful cargo? You must have known the risks. But you must know something. Justinia...she’s gone. They’re all gone. The ferals are ripping open Fade rifts across the world as we speak. It’s as if the explosion has pulled open the sky. They’re pouring unstable creatures and dragons into our world. Any ferals who wished to help our cause are dead or in hiding. We must know what happened,” Leliana said, nearly begging. 

 

Ursa looked up in surprise at being addressed and then bit her lip. “I...I don’t know. I don’t remember. I was...running. Someone put the egg in my hands and pushed me. And I ran. Until I couldn’t. Then I was here. They’re...all...dead? All of those riders? Their dragons? Justinia?” 

 

Cassandra watched from the stairs as the young woman before them teared up. She had the marks of the Dalish tattooed along her face. In the sallow light the red lines of the tree painted down her face seemed brighter than they had when she’d been dragged inside. She was marked as most of her people were but she wasn’t a rider. She was too old to have been chosen. Over 20 easily. Her voice was young, though. Scared. The way Cassandra had felt inside when the lights had blown into the sky and the Conclave had crumbled. Her anger eased, as did her distrust. She stepped into the room.

 

“Yes. All dead,” she said. Leliana looked back at her without comment. “We need to move. Solas believes that egg might be able to stem off the large Fade rift above the sight. It’s pouring out demons we haven’t seen in 100s of years. Our riders are trying to fight them off but we need to shut it. You need to come with us. Until we can figure out how to get that egg out of your hands, I’m afraid you’re needed.” 

 

Ursa bit her lip and looked down at the egg. She hadn’t been meant to ride or to fight. She’d been told as much as a child. No dragon would choose her. She was too soft. As she pondered, her phone buzzed and she wiggled. 

 

“It’s been going off non stop,” Leliana offered. 

 

“Please...can you check it? I can’t. And my friend...I thought he might have been there. Please,” Ursa begged. 

 

Leliana looked back at Cassandra who nodded. They opened the cell and pulled her to her feet. Cassandra took the phone from Ursa’s pocket and held the screen up to Ursa’s face. Ursa slouched with relief when she saw Dorian’s name with a (7) next to it. 

 

“He’s okay. Okay. Let’s go,” she said, steeling herself. Cassandra pushed the phone back down into Ursa’s pocket and nodded. Ursa set her shoulders and followed, unprepared for what she would see outside. 

 

____

 

URSA reminded herself to thank Cassandra when they were through this. Cassandra had jumped in front of demons and small dragons alike to protect her. The woman was breathless and bloody as they made it to where the Fade rift glowed. Ursa tried not to cower. There were people all about the space, some with dragons and some without. She recognized Solas, the world’s most renowned dragon expert and Varric Tethras, writer and known secret keeper of many of the Scottish Rages. The rest were a mystery. Cassandra dove into the fight while Ursa tried to stay out of the way. Solas strode towards them with purpose after the demons had been killed and the Fade rift’s crackle was the only sound to be heard, his eyes alight as he saw the egg in her hands. 

 

“Quickly or more will come,” Cassandra warned. 

 

“Yes,” he said distractedly. He took Ursa’s hands and lifted them. “Yes. It should work.” 

 

He raised her hands with his own and shouted out in Dragon tongue. The words caused a flash of green and black to cross Ursa’s mind and she nearly stumbled from the feeling but the egg began to glow. She watched, her head aching, as a light burst from the crack and the Fade rift above her head turned a darker green. It expended for a moment before blowing outward, causing them all to stumble. Solas let her hands go and she stepped back, trying to dull the buzzing in her ears. 

 

“Cassandra! You found a way to close the rift. Good.” A tall man in full armor strode towards them, a dark gold dragon at his side. The dragon looked regal, a dark blue muzzle lifted high in the air as it sniffed out the new egg. The man himself matched the creature’s demeanor, his armor adorned with a fur cape and his shoulders pulled back. 

 

“ **Yes. Splendid work,”** the dragon said in dragon tongue. Everyone learned the language of dragons from infancy but Ursa couldn’t place the creature’s accent. She cocked her head at both man and dragon. They were well matched. Both beautiful and powerful. The kind of power that sat quietly until it was needed. The kind of stillness and assuredness that Ursa envied in others. 

 

Cassandra shook her head. “It wasn’t me. It was the prisoner.” 

 

“Oh, wonderful,” Ursa couldn’t help but utter. “What a wonderful name.” 

 

The man’s eyes flitted to her and she froze. His hazel eyes were intelligent and bright and they studied her for but a moment before turning to Cassandra. 

 

“Are you sure this is wise?” he asked. 

 

Cassandra looked back at Ursa who tried to breathe normally once more. She shook her head. “No. But it is our only option. Commander Rutherford, Ursa Lavellan.” 

 

The Commander’s eyes took in all of Ursa before finding her gaze once more. “Let us hope it’s for the best. Come, Anscomb,” he said. 

 

The dragon snorted, sniffing once more before turning to follow his human. Ursa let out the breath she’d been holding. 

 

“Holy hell,” she said shakily. 

 

“Don’t worry. He makes most women feel that way,” Varric said with a smirk. “Varric. Also a prisoner, if it makes you feel any better.” 

 

“How did you know my name?” Ursa asked in lieu of answering Varric. 

 

“Your I.D for the Keep. I’m afraid we don’t have time for true introductions. This is Solas of the Dread Wolf Keep and Varric, the scoundrel,” Cassandra said with a frown at the short man. 

 

Varric grinned widely. “You wound me, Seeker. Come along, eggy. Us prisoners should stick together. And we’ve got a Keep to visit.” 

 

Ursa couldn’t help but smirk even as Cassandra made a noise of disgust. As they went along, Solas explained the magic of the mysterious egg and what he believed the dragonling within could do. The feral dragons had a connection to magics long lost that they kept by opening Fade rifts. The Fade was the world dragons had originally migrated from. Though many humans tended to forget that dragons weren’t born of their world, it was a lesson they would learn the hard way. With the bonding of human to dragon, the dragons slowly lost their magic. They were still strong. Still more powerful than humans alone but they could no longer delve into that primal force. Feral dragons had grown tired of what they saw as abuse by humans. They longed to free their brethren. For many years an uneasy peace had been kept. Fade rifts only pulled open within their own territories and closed when they got too big. But as dragon kind grew more prominent, so did their unrest and anger. The war had begun 10 years before in earnest but was only reaching its peak now. This dragonling was meant to be a tying force but with the explosion at the Conclave that hope seemed to be lost. 

 

“So I’m holding the last hope of all of our world?” Ursa said faintly as they reached the gates of Haven once more. She was woozy from the 

 

“Yes. And in its distress it seems to have bonded to you,” Solas replied. The thin man looked Dalish but his eyes held a different light. His skin was smooth, his mouth a thin line and in his gaze was a knowledge beyond his years. He was notorious for never having bonded to a dragon. He spent his life around them only to never be chosen. They had that in common. Ursa looked down at the egg. 

 

“But I’m too old for it to bond to me,” she said, “So what happens when it hatches?” 

 

“If it does. That crack seems to be a wound, not self induced and we have seen no movement since you’ve been brought in. But it will find its rider. Dragons always do,” Solas said. 

 

Varric looked down. His own dragon, Hawke, was far off working hard for the Glory. It was a constant ache to live without his dragon in his mind. He said nothing as Ursa processed that information. They had reached the main Keep and she tried to pull her hands free once more. It was in this moment that something shifted and Cassandra, not noticing the change, called over a small group. 

 

“Commander, how are our forces?” she asked the man Ursa had seen before. He spoke but Ursa’s mind was filled with a green light and she couldn’t hear his response. She stared at the crack and pulled again with renewed energy. 

 

“And Josephine, the rift is closed for now. I need that news out to the rest of the Glory so they may spread it. Leliana, what news do you have from beyond our walls?” Cassandra asked. Ursa couldn’t focus on the new woman or the others around her. 

 

In her hands the egg cracked further and her mind lit with teal laughter. As the egg shattered in her hands she fell backwards. A bright blue tongue slid up her wrist. Ursa mindlessly turned it up so the tip of the slithering tongue pressed against the pulse in her elbow. She swooned at the touch. It burned but that didn’t matter. Her head swam as the mark of the dragon riders was burned into her flesh. She didn’t hear the others around her crying out. All she heard was the voice in her head. It came in swirling greens with a brown undertone and felt as warm and comforting as it looked.

 

“ **_Finally,”_ ** it sighed.  **_“It’s lovely to finally meet you, Ursa. I’m Dyna. I’ve waited so long.”_ **

 

“Oh,” Ursa breathed before falling backwards, the small green dragon chuckling and curling up on her stomach. 

 

**_“They will take care of you. Sleep, my soul bound. We’ll wake soon enough and the world will be new. We’ll make it so.”_ **

  
Ursa couldn’t have fought her closing eyelids even if she wished to. For a third time that day, she let sleep claim her. 


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa bonds with Dyna and Dorian is the best friend anyone could ever have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no posting schedule so this will be updated when I've written and edited the chapters.

Chapter 2

 

“...and I had to tell them that you clearly have narcolepsy or they never would’ve believed someone could pass out three times in one day.” 

 

Ursa woke to a bemused voice above her and a small but warm body beside her. She’d dreamed of lush fields and then of a dark world where power surged from the ground she walked on. She’d spread her wings and she’d flown far and wide but now she settled back into her own mind, confusion making her slow. 

 

“They’ve also blamed it on your new bond. No one your age has bonded to a dragon in over 100 years, you see. Ah. You’re awake. Good. I do like to hear myself talk but this was getting ridiculous.” 

 

“Dorian?” Ursa groaned. 

 

“I’ve also forgiven you for not answering your phone. Nearly dying multiple times is a good excuse, I think,” Dorian continued. Ursa forced her eyes open. 

 

“Will you shut up?” she ground out. He laughed.

 

“There you are. I was worried after the first 24 hours of no response. I even recited the dragon rite but nothing. I was sure if anything was to wake you, it would be that,” he said. 

 

Dorian was a good looking man but Ursa had grown used to that. She watched his smile. Noticed the tightness at the edges and the relief as his shoulders slumped. She looked around for his dragon but couldn’t find her bright purple scales in the small hut. It would be a tight squeeze with the full grown dragon but she found the scene lacking without the royally colored creature.

 

“Where’s Audri?” she asked. 

 

“Off with that frankly stunning Commander. Did you meet that man? I’d climb him like a tree if given the chance. Holy dragon’s talons,” Dorian sighed. 

 

“Dorian. Focus. Why is she with him?” Ursa asked, a smile playing on her face. In her mind, Dyna was waking and she blinked as the dragon’s yawn colored her mind in shades of yellow and orange. 

 

“I’m a rider. He wanted to assess my abilities but since I refused to leave you or to pledge myself with undying loyalty to the cause without you awake, Audri offered herself for his scrutiny. I don’t think they like me much. But then, no one ever trusts riders from Tevinter. It’s like we have some kind of mad cow disease,” he scoffed. 

 

**_“There are many who are mad in Tevinter,”_ ** Dyna said in Ursa’s mind, causing her to jump. 

 

“Yes. But not Dorian,” Ursa said firmly. She looked at the little green dragon at her side with a glare. The dragon laughed. 

 

“ **_I did not say he was. Though he might be. The good kind, though. The kind that lights the mind. I’ll need to speak with his matched before I decide for myself. Though you do love him,”_ ** Dyna mused. 

 

“I do,” Ursa replied. 

 

“Ah. Inner speech. I’d forgotten how annoying that is when you’re on the other end. Well. Now that I know you’re still breathing, I’ll go find Audri. Do come out soon. I know it’s usual a three day ordeal but you’ve been out for two and the world is a bit in shambles. I’m afraid that wound too tight Seeker might force your sleeping body into the meetings if you don’t get out of this bed today,” Dorian said, rising to his feet. 

 

“Dorian…” she trailed off, unsure how to tell him she was grateful for him. The relief upon seeing him would have shaken her to her bones had she not already seen so much. There were tears in her eyes as he reached for her. He pulled her into him, Dyna sliding closer to the embrace as the bed dipped. 

 

“We’re both alive. We’ll get through this. I needed a way to get away from Tevinter. You’ve given me one. We’ll rise to the occasion, won’t we?” he asked, pulling back from the hug to wipe her tears. She nodded, Dyna’s affirmation a deep green in her mind. 

 

“Good.” He pressed a kiss to her forehead before striding from the room. Ursa blinked as she was suddenly alone with Dyna.

 

**_“I won’t bite,”_ ** the bemused voice of bright greens and light pinks said across her mind. 

 

“I know that,” Ursa said. 

 

“ **_You do. You’re worried you’re too old. That your mind will break. That you were never meant to be a rider. Don’t worry, Ursa. You weren’t meant to be a rider. You were meant to be a savior. They’ll call you the Herald of the Dragons. The prophesized human meant to tie our people together forever. The one chosen by Andraste herself. They’ll be right, in their own way. I was born to fix this world and you were born to help me.”_ **

 

“How are you sure of that?” Ursa asked. The dragon seemed to smirk. Dyna’s scales were a shifting green. Some bright green and some dark,so  as she moved the light caught them and she shimmered. Her muzzle was a bright silver that matched her eyes and the tip of her pointed tail. She was a mix between a Scottish pointer and a feral chaos dragon. It mixed in her coloring and shape, her wings doubled so they would look like that of a dragonfly’s when she could fly with them. She would grow to the size of a large horse but right now was the size of a medium dog. She draped herself across Ursa’s legs and peered up at her, her thin wings fluttering. 

 

**_“Because I feel it. It is in my mother and her mother before her. You were chosen before you were even thought of by your great great  grandmother. We have known it would be you. And when my mother mated with my father, they knew it too. Ursa of the Dalish hills. Ursa, born of the city and the hills who feels at home nowhere. Ursa who will love in the most difficult of times and who will flourish in adversity. We knew your name before it was uttered upon your birth. And because they knew, I do too. You know our kind. You know our hive mind of childhood. I’ve shown you the fields of my mother’s mother and the dark spaces of my father’s kin. We will walk in both before this is done,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

“Will we win?” Ursa whispered, thinking of the broken Conclave. Of the dead Justinia. Of the rift now growing between ferals and their tamed brothers and sisters. 

 

**_“That is not set in stone. Nothing truly is and I’m afraid I can’t promise that. I wish I could. But we will try, Ursa. We will not give up. We will fight until we can’t any longer and even then, we will try. Will we not?”_ **

 

Ursa stared into her dragon’s liquid eyes. In her left hand, her dominant hand, a green light glowed. She knew without knowing how she did that it was a bit of the egg shell. It was a part of her now. A part of Dyna’s power given to her as a gift. She had never fought for anything. The little training she had with the ironcast weapons of the keep was vague and sparse. This was a war. One she’d hoped to never step foot into. Biting her lip, she considered for a moment. Finally she curled that glowing hand around the ridges of her new partner’s back. 

 

“Yes,” she said, “We will.”

 

____

 

“WE cannot rely on some young girl to lead us!” Commander Cullen Rutherford argued, his hands pressed firmly into the large, oak table. 

 

“I am not asking us to.  But she is now bonded to our only hope. If we wish to use the dragon, we must also use the young  _ woman  _ as well,” Josephine Montilyet shot back. “She has closed a Fade rift. It would look good for us politically to stand beside her.” 

 

“It was an accident. She’s a Keep worker who knows nothing of the world of riders,” Cassandra said with a shake of her head. 

 

“She has more power than she believes. With the dragon beside her she could be a great asset,” Solas said without looking up from his tablet. He was researching the powers of feral dragons and what it could mean for Dyna, his face lit by the screen.

 

“If we’re considering breaking from the Glory we have to have a figurehead. This girl could be it. Her and the dragon,” Josephine said firmly. 

 

“Josie…” Leliana started but Josephine raised her hand to stop it. 

 

“Cullen has said her friend is strong. Probably stronger than he wants to admit. All reports of Ursa state that she was a hard worker. Good with the eggs. She isn’t a stranger to a Keep, no matter how much you want to think it,” Josephine said, glaring at Cullen and Cassandra who stood united on the other side of the table. “She isn’t a child and she isn’t blind. We should consider it.”

 

“She’s also not deaf,” Ursa said dryly from the doorway. “You know, if you’re going to shout about me you might want to at least close the door.” 

 

They all turned to look. Solas lifted his eyes from the tablet, Josephine flushed, Leliana crossed her arms, Cassandra lifted her eyebrows and Cullen leaned away from the table with a slight look of surprise on his face. Anscomb was nowhere to be seen but the Commander was still just as consuming without him. Ursa shook that thought away and turned to the rest of the group. 

 

“Dyna and I have been talking. We’re willing to help. In whatever way we can. Though if you call me a girl one more time I might have to rethink it,” she said. 

 

She watched with pleasure as Cullen flushed. 

 

“Where is the dragon?” Solas asked. 

 

“She’s speaking with Audri. It seems we’ve missed quite a bit in two days. Audri says Tevinter was quick to back the Glory’s official stance of ‘we’re at war with the ferals and not backing that crazed sect at Haven’. And my friend Sera tells me that back in the Dalish hills the Rage is also leaning towards that stance. It seems I’ve missed what your stance is and no one seems able to tell me,” Ursa said. 

 

“Did you take your time coming to find us?” Cassandra asked irritably. 

 

“Yes,” Ursa said cheekily, “Dorian told me you wanted me to hurry so naturally I spoke to everyone I could find along the way. Though they all seemed afraid of me.” 

 

“Your hand is glowing,” Cullen said suddenly as if just noticing the bright green light. Ursa looked at him in surprise and then down at her hand. 

 

“Yes. It’s part of Dyna’s shell. I think it holds the power you used from the egg. She says she might be able to close rifts but she knows I’ll be able to, too. With this,” she said.  She turned her hand in the light, her thin wrist rotating so the glowing line in her hand cast a shadow on her upper arm. 

 

“Does it hurt?” Josephine asked in near reverence. Ursa shrugged. “I once had a dragonling latch onto me through the birthing process and not let go for three hours. Nearly lost my hand. This isn’t any worse than that.” 

 

She could feel them sizing her up. Her Dalish build with its city twist. Her coming of age tattoo spanning from her forehead down to her cheeks. The new V-neck and pair of jeans that had been laid out for her when she’d woken up. Her shoulder length auburn hair that she wore buzzed on the left side. She didn’t exactly scream “head of a revolution” but she was willing to try if they were willing to look past the prejudice. Like those of the Tevinter Rage, there was a negative feeling towards the Dalish. Most were called “knife ear” by their more modern counterparts and were seen as only good for industrial work. The Dalish Keep mined the mountains and hunted for meats to sell in the city. Though they were fairly prosperous, the other Keeps thought of them as the hicks of the Glory. Many of the graduated riders who chose to accept a place in the Keep did so to stay out of harm’s way. Ursa knew the burdens her people bore but she looked resolutely back at them, even as her heart pounded. 

 

“ **_I know you hate being seen but let them look. Let them judge. And let them be sorry later for underestimating you,”_ ** Dyna said in her mind. Ursa nodded to herself and waited out the silence. 

 

It was Leliana who broke it. “We need a face to show the people. They’re calling her the Herald of Andraste already. It will look good for us to include her in our proceedings.” 

 

“The Herald of Andraste? The goddess of dragonkind? Isn’t that a bit much?” Ursa asked incredulously. It was one thing to hear her dragon whisper the name in her mind but a whole other to hear it spoken aloud.  She felt Dyna coming across the foyer and turned to allow her entry to the conversation. The dragon wrapped herself around Ursa’s feet and watched the group with calm eyes. 

 

**“It’s not,”** she said aloud in dragon tongue,  **“Andraste was said to have opened the Fade to allow us out. It was then prophesied that one day she would return in another form to bless us once more in a time of great need. We have believed that was you for many years, Ursa.”**

 

“But…” Ursa said helplessly. She couldn’t think of a good retort. All she knew was that she wasn’t the blessed form of some goddess. She was simply Ursa who lived a quiet life in the Dalish Keep. She kept her head down and hadn’t expected much from life but to get through it. She was not meant to lead an army. 

 

**“You must stop thinking of yourself as nothing special,”** Dyna said aloud. She hoped the others would step in. They too had been chosen for the cause, whether they knew it or not, and she needed them to support Ursa in her endeavours. Without them she would fail.  **“You are kind. Strong. Beautiful past the skin. Many people are not. The origin of your birth is of no consequence. It may be the deciding factor of my life, but not of yours.”**

 

**“** And you,” Solas said, stepping into the conversation, “Why choose someone too old to bond? You must know what it can do to the human mind.” 

 

“ **She’s standing is she not? She’s walking. Talking. She could take it. Don’t presume to lecture** **_me,_ ** **Wolf,”** Dyna snapped back, a green light forming around her mouth. 

 

“Solas only meant how could you know it would be okay. That she would live,” Josephine stepped in smoothly as Solas began to open his mouth. He shut it and shook his head angrily before slinking from the room. Ursa found she wasn’t sad to see him go. He made her feel an itch beneath her skin that she didn’t like. 

 

**“I know just what he meant, the old cur. But as I said, we knew. I knew. She could bond to any dragon at any age but she was meant for this. Though it might feel tiring, but then don’t all bonds. Now I believe she asked what your official stance is. I would like to know too, if you’re willing to share,”** Dyna said. 

 

As Josephine launched into the unofficial stance of Haven’s Keep, Ursa put her hand on Dyna’s head and stroked absently, ignoring the eyes on her to listen. 

 

**_“They’re smart to stand alone. By the time this is done I fear the others will fall. The Rages will succumb to madness and fear. We cannot let that happen here. You are hope. Your soul is unique. You cannot let terror overcome you, no matter how much you wish to.”_ **

 

By the time the four were done explaining, Ursa was exhausted. She was leaning heavily on the table with Dyna around her legs. Her body felt sluggish and she nodded blurrily when asked if she was alright. 

 

“You’re exhausted. Bonding to a dragon takes much energy. You need rest,” Cullen said more kindly than he’d said anything else to her.

 

“I think that’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me since I’ve met you,” Ursa said without thinking. She blushed after the words left her mouth. Cullen stuttered as Josephine stepped in.

 

“Of course. How silly of me to forget. I bonded with Melly so long ago I didn’t even think. Come. We’ll help you to your room. Tomorrow we can talk some more,” she said. 

 

Ursa nodded and felt them take her arms. They helped her walk out of the main building and up the stairs to the hut they’d left her in before. She found that her feet wouldn’t respond as usual and by the time she was dropped into the bed, she was half asleep.

 

“Wherz Dorian?” she slurred. 

 

“We’ll get him,” Josephine promised as she stepped back. She didn’t look at the Commander. She knew if she did she would see something he didn’t wish her to know yet. Keeping her eyes on the ground, she left both young woman and dragon to sleep once more. 

 

When they’d closed the door, Josephine clapped her hands. She was a pretty woman with a happy disposition. Dark hair in ringlet curls haloed her face and her blouse was a bright gold that matched her tan pants. Her skin, a light mocha, complemented her dark eyes and rosy lips. She smiled brightly. 

 

“I’ll find Dorian. You may go back to your duties, Commander,” she said. 

 

Cullen shook his head, trying to clear away his awe. She’d stood there for over two hours listening to them talk all while on her third day of a bond. He and Anscomb had been a mess for five days after their bond and he’d been only a child. A tender hearted boy at the age of thirteen who could bounce back from anything but who had fallen to the ground at the touch of a dragon. He’d seen her knees begin to wobble but had also realized she wouldn’t say anything until they told her they were through. It took strength to fight a dragon sleep and he was grudgingly impressed. 

 

“Isn’t she beautiful, Commander?” Josephine said slyly when Cullen hadn’t yet moved away from the door. 

 

“What? Oh... I don’t….” he began to flail and Josephine threw him a line. 

 

“Those scales. They simply glow. She’ll look wonderful in any photos taken, don’t you think?” she asked. 

 

“Oh. Yes. Quite,” he said, sounding embarrassed. 

 

“I’ll find Ursa’s friend, you may go back to your duties,” Josephine said again and this time he nodded and left. She snorted and shook her head, heading towards the rider’s barracks where she knew Dorian would be. 

 

____

 

DORIAN was worried. He didn’t like worried. It tasted sour and slowed down his metabolism. Audri tittered at him as he began to do his push ups more rigorously. The way people in Haven spoke of Ursa scared him. She was a kind soul. The only one he’d met on his first trip to the Dalish Keep when he was a boy. She’d smiled at him and showed him his room and he’d fallen instantly in love with her. It was really too bad she wasn’t a man or his life would’ve been complete. But she was the wrong gender for him and so, instead, they’d become the closest of friends. Next to Alexia he didn’t have many and Ursa was in his top 3. He would drop anything to help her but this might be too much for even him to fix for her. 

 

**_“She isn’t going to die. Dyna wouldn’t allow it,”_ ** Audri said. 

 

“ _ I’m not worried about her dying. I’m worried about everything else,”  _ he replied to her voice in his mind with his own thoughts. It was something all those bonded to dragons learned to do early on so they could have private conversations easily.  

 

**_“Well don’t. It’s a useless emotion. I thought we’d learned that when your Father tried to sever our bond,”_ ** Audri retorted. 

 

“ _ We learned not to worry for ourselves. Not for others. Ursa is too gentle for this.”  _

 

**_“Not you too. Ursa is strong. You know that. Everyone who knows her at all knows that. The only one who doesn’t is her. And I’m tired of this conversation. We’re going in circles. Keep sweating, if it makes you feel better,”_ ** Audri said, her voice snide in dark pinks and red. 

 

Dorian snorted but renewed his efforts, tucking one arm behind his back. 

 

“Very impressive, Mr. Pavus,” Josephine said as she entered the room. Dorian looked up from his place between two beds. 

 

“If you’re that easily impressed I’m sure I have other things I could show you,” Dorian flirted. 

 

Josephine smiled. “I don’t think I’m your type. Ms. Lavellan is back in her room and she’s asked for you. She’s probably asleep but I’m sure she’d enjoy if you were there when she woke up.” 

 

Dorian smirked back. He’d wondered if anyone had noticed the way his eyes had lingered on the Commander and some of his men. It seemed that Josephine Montiyet was more observant than he’d given her credit for. 

 

“Thank you, Ms. Montiyet. I’ll find my way there,” Dorian said. He gestured to Audri who nodded to Josephine as they left. 

 

Josephine watched them go with a bemused smile before heading back to her office to finish up the formal letters she had been drafting. 

 

___

 

DORIAN found Ursa asleep in her clothing with Dyna tucked into the curve of her stomach. Her knees were pulled up, cradling the warmth of the dragon to her body. He smiled at the intimate scene. 

 

“Silly girl. Didn’t even take the time to change,” he muttered. He went around the hut pulling open drawers until he found a soft tank top he could easily maneuver her into. He pulled her body up, knowing that a dragon sleep would be hard to wake her from. He settled next to her and pulled the V-neck T-shirt off her. He unhooked her bra and pulled it from her chest. She murmured and leaned into him but didn’t wake. 

 

“You’re not helping,” he said but he couldn’t keep the warmth from his voice. He worked the tank top over her head and settled it over her waist. She smiled in her sleep as he laid her back down. 

 

“Third time I’ve gotten you out of your pants. I’m honored,” Dorian joked as he unbuttoned her pants and yanked them down. He smiled at her pink, frilly, panties. “Yes, you’re the fearsome warrior they’re looking for.” 

 

Ursa muttered in her sleep and rolled to pull Dyna close once more, her knees curling back up. Dorian pulled the blanket up to her waist and then looked around the room. The bed was large enough to accommodate a large dragon and their large rider. Barracks still made Dorian uncomfortable and the down of the blankets were enticing. Ursa was small and her dragon was only a baby. It didn’t take Dorian long to make a decision. He shed his own shirt and stripped down to his boxers, sliding into the bed beside her. 

 

“Come on, Audri. We can sleep off this day,” he said. His dragon climbed in with him, curling her three pronged tail around his leg as she did every night and they drifted off as well. 

 

___

 

IT wasn’t the first time Ursa had woken with Dorian in her bed. When he’d visit with the others riders from Tevinter she’d let him sleep in her room. He wasn’t well liked among the Tevinter riders and he feared sleeping in the same room as them, even when they were expected to be on their best behavior. Instead he’d sneak to Ursa’s room. The first time he’d gotten caught sneaking out the other riders had sneered and made jokes but no one made him come back to the main barracks. Ursa had been alright with the rumors and so Dorian had continued to stay in her room. Though those from both Tevinter and the Dalish Keep laughed at her, calling her the gay man’s lover as well as some other unsavory things, she wouldn’t refuse him entry. Dorian had it hard enough and she knew it. 

 

She sighed into warmth of the man at her back while pulling Dyna closer. 

 

“Pleasant dream?” Dorian murmured sleepily into her neck. His arm tightened about her waist before he rolled onto his back and stretched his arms upward. Audri hummed and stretched her front claws. 

 

**“I need a good heat stone,”** she said. 

 

**“I think I could enjoy that too,”** Dyna commented, her voice rough with sleep. 

 

“ **I’ll show you. It’s down by the barracks,”** Audri said nicely. Dyna stretched, rubbing her smooth head under Ursa’s chin. 

 

“ **I’ll find you after,”** Dyna said. 

 

“I know. I’m sure they’re going to have me running around today. Many busy days ahead,” Ursa said. Though she’d woken from dreams of golden fields happily, now the weight of the world was settling back into the lines of her shoulders. 

 

Dyna snorted a warm breath on Ursa’s face and reassured her with a caress of light green in her mind. Ursa nodded, her eyes fluttering shut at the gentle touch. Once Audri and Dyna were gone, she rolled so she could lie on Dorian’s chest. 

 

“Did you change me last night?” she asked. 

 

“I did. You’d fallen asleep in jeans. I know how you detest jeans,” he replied, holding her against him. 

 

“Thanks. She showed me what the Fade looks like to dragons. It was beautiful. The first night it was so dark but this was through their eyes. It was amazing. It was so...large. I don’t….I don’t know what I can do to help with this war. I know I said I would help them but I’m not really sure I can. Dyna can. But me? I’m nothing. Not really. Just someone who was in the wrong place at the right time,” Ursa said. 

 

Dorian made a noise in the back of his throat. “That’s the most untrue thing you’ve ever said and I’ve seen you lie to a dragon’s face,” he said. “You’re not nothing. Even without Dyna. Besides, you know how I detest self loathing in others. I like to save it all for myself. Get up. Go look in that mirror. Tell me what you see and we’ll work with that. Then, we’ll find you the hottest outfit in this place so you can fluster the Commander some more. And  _ then  _ we’ll deal with whatever shit they’ve got us wading into.”

 

“Us?” Ursa asked, arching her right eyebrow and peering up at Dorian. She ignored the rest of his rambling focusing instead on the important part. 

 

“You think you’re doing this without me? Are you nuts? I’ve needed a chance to break from Tevinter for years. Besides, if I left you alone you’d just wallow and never get anything done. Now. Get your ass up and tell me what you see,” Dorian said, smacking her thigh so she yelped and jumped up. 

 

Ursa stood in front of the mirror in the grey tank top and pink panties she’d slept in. Putting her hands on her slight hips, she turned from side to side. 

 

“I see a Dalish girl who never quite fit in,” she said.

 

“No. Tell me features. Not what you know as a whole. Only what you see,” Dorian said. 

 

Ursa sighed but knew that Dorian would never let her leave if she didn’t do what he asked. He was as stubborn as Sera sometimes. She looked at herself trying to see only the pieces. 

 

“Reddish hair. Longish, thick,” she started, “Blueish green eyes thanks to my mother’s family. Light skin from being inside. Freckles from when I do go outside. A tattoo to remind me of who I am even when I don’t want to be.”

 

Dorian cleared his throat and Ursa rolled her eyes. “Fine. A tree tattoo. Small hips. A small waist. Thin arms. Long, spindly legs.” 

 

Dorian stepped up behind her. Ursa let her gaze run over him in the mirror and felt herself groan. 

 

“What?” he asked, sounding amused.

 

“I just wish I was as beautiful as you,” she said. 

 

“Oh well, you should. There’s no one as beautiful as me,” Dorian joked. He pushed his dark hair off his forehead and smiled at his own reflection so his straight, white, teeth shined. “But let me tell you what I see when I look at you. Platonically, of course.” 

 

Ursa laughed as he turned her straight into the floor length mirror. “Now. Your hair is beautiful. Long and thick and just the right shade so that when the light catches it, it looks like embers in a fire. Your eyes are odd and that makes them gorgeous. You didn’t mention your lips which are...well juicy is the only word, isn’t it? Stop laughing, it’s true,” Dorian chided when Ursa devolved into giggles. 

 

“You know the men at the Keep watch you. The way you walk is so feminine, so stunning. Your hips taper perfectly. Your breasts...well we know everyone loves breasts and yours are exceptional. Your tattoo makes your skin look even more delicate and those freckles...they’re endearing. You are stunning and I would be surprised if any of them could look away from you. You have to walk like you know that. Show them your worth. At the start your face does that, even if you hate the idea of that. So let them stare. Give them a reason to. Now. Let’s find you that outfit. You have to dress to impress on this job and we both know how terrible you are at that.”

 

“That’s right, butter me up. That’s the way to get what you want,” Ursa muttered but she let Dorian lead her to the small wardrobe and smiled as he monologued about the clothing that he pulled out. When he’d finally picked out what he wanted her to wear the morning was progressing quickly and the sun had lit the hut.  

 

“Just let me put it on!” she protested, “We’ve been in here forever! I’m starving!” 

 

“Fine. Fine. This top. Those pants. These shoes. I’ll wait,” Dorian said, settling back on the bed. 

 

When Ursa was dressed Dorian pulled her wavy locks forward over her shoulder and smudged a line of eyeliner across her eyes. He painted her protesting lips in bright red and then pulled his own clothes on. 

 

“Ready to show off?” he asked, offering her glowing hand his arm. 

 

“No. But you are,” she replied.

 

“Damn straight,” Dorian smirked. 

 

Together, they walked out into the light of a new day, ready to take on the world. 


	3. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa is brought before the Glory. A training session with Cullen happens before she begins her travels in the Hinterlands.

Chapter 3

 

CASSANDRA was arguing with Varric when she heard Cullen snort into his coffee. They were all sitting in the dining hall of the Keep, dragons on one side and their humans on the others. Josephine too had stopped speaking to Leliana in favor of looking up in slack jawed surprise at the people entering the hall. 

 

The dining hall had opened doors so anyone approaching could be seen by those inside. Cassandra turned and squinted when it became apparent no one was speaking anymore. Dyna and Audri were already at breakfast eating their meats and they were the only two who didn’t bother to look up when Dorian and Ursa entered the room. Dorian had his head held high while Ursa seemed to be struggling to copy the pose. But it wasn’t the man everyone was staring at. It was the woman at his side. 

 

When they’d found her she’d looked very young. She’d been crumpled around the egg in a pair of torn leggings and an old T-shirt that was stained with smoke. She’d looked almost childlike when she’d woken. Without her I.D they would have thought her just a teenager, barely an adult but it was a woman who entered the dining hall. 

 

She wore a long black tunic and a pair of red leggings that clung to her thin legs and slightly flared hips. The tunic showed just enough of her shoulders and chest and accented her pale skin. The way Dorian snuck looks over at her it was obvious he knew what the clothing would do for her, even if she didn’t. She didn’t wobble in the black, heeled boots he’d asked her to wear, though she did seem uncomfortable. Cassandra looked back at her comrades. 

 

She wasn’t the one known to notice everything but she could see that Josephine was nearly drooling while Varric scribbled on a napkin quickly, his eyes darting up and then back down as Ursa walked towards them. But it was Cullen she watched. His jaw tightened and he looked quickly back down into his coffee mug. He took a swig before standing. 

 

“Seeker,” he said gruffly before walking towards the door. His shoulder brushed Ursa’s as he went and she turned to look at him. 

 

“Commander,” she greeted. He nodded curtly and kept walking. She blinked in surprise but sat down in his seat with Dorian at her side. “Wow. Does he hate me or what?” she said. 

 

“I really don’t think that’s it,” Dorian said in amusement. He looked at the different plates on the table and served himself. He didn’t seem very concerned with the sudden silence and he ate with an air of smugness that made Cassandra want to smack him. She turned her attention instead to the young woman who cautiously sipped out of a coffee mug and frowned at the smudge of lipstick on the rim.

 

“Are you feeling better? The Commander was concerned you wouldn’t be ready for some work today but I see you’re looking healthy and well adjusted,” Cassandra said. 

 

Josephine and Leliana watched as surprise crossed Ursa’s face at the words before she nodded. 

 

“Yes. I’m just as surprised as anyone. I’ve seen riders be out for days but I think the worst of it is behind me. I know I would love to have some time to settle in but that’s hardly going to happen I’m assuming. How many rifts have opened since this started?” she asked, leaning forward. 

 

Cassandra was surprised at how engaged the woman seemed to be. She’d tucked her hair behind one slightly pointed ear and she seemed unconcerned with what she looked like, unlike when she first walked into the room. The Dalish were not well respected. Said to have descended from ancient elves that had since died out, the Dalish were the last remnants of an ancient race and people didn’t like to remember the things they’d killed off. Many Dalish who wandered from their hills and their Keep hid their ears behind hair or hats but Ursa left them free to be seen. It said something about the woman in front of them that she wasn’t ashamed of what she was. 

 

“There have been smaller rifts opening across the country and some even across the ocean in America. We’d like to deal with the ones closer to home first but we’ll need some help. There’s a Keep not far from here that follows feral laws but isn’t quite feral. They call themselves the Unspoken. They deal in basic Fade magic and should be able to help us close the rift above the Conclave fully. From there we can assess. Of course, there are also the Blood Brothers. They drink dragon blood to gain the powers of the creatures. They too could help but unfortunately, neither group will speak to us at the moment,” Josephine said. 

 

Leliana nodded. “The Blood Brothers stand with the Glory while the Unspoken have been fighting for visibility within the Glory so they too would rather not be seen with us.”

 

“Would someone please tell me what our official stance is? I know I signed on but I’d really like to know what I’m fighting for here. And not the half assed explanation you gave me yesterday. What have you announced since?” Ursa asked. 

 

“Three days ago someone blew up the Conclave. As you know that meeting was meant to form an alliance between the Glory of Scotland and its feral counterparts. Both sides are denying any connection to the act and as such, the ferals are ripping open the sky and the Glory is dealing with fights from within. We stepped away. A long time ago when Rages were being formed there was an idea. A way to stand above the fighting and work for the better of all living things instead of just one side. So we reformed based on that ideal. Justinia taught that when the world needed it, an Inquisition is the only option. Since then, the Glory has denounced us and the ferals believe we’re fighting against them. We’re alone here in Haven. But the people believe in you. The Herald. The chosen one. If we could gain some more footing with the people we could get a meeting with either group. Meanwhile, we’ve been called to the city to meet with the Glory officials. They want to put you on trial as a heretic. We’ll try to ensure it doesn’t get that far but I’m afraid you do need to make an appearance,” Leliana said. She did look as if she regretted having to give Ursa the news. 

 

“I...do I need to go alone?” Ursa asked, trying hard not to show her apprehension. 

 

“No. You may choose your companions, naturally,” Josephine said. 

 

“Oh good. Into the lion’s den,” Ursa said. 

 

“Luckily, you have lions on your side,” Dorian said. “I’ll go with you, of course.” 

 

“Obviously. I mean, I’m now the daughter of a god or whatever. People want to kill me. Of course you’d want to come with me,” Ursa said, struggling to joke as the future loomed over her head. 

 

“Clearly. You’ll add to my already illustrious image,” Dorian shot back, a small smile reassuring her. 

 

“We can’t send just you two,” Cassandra said, “How do we know you’ll act in our best interest?”

 

“So you come too,” Ursa said readily. She’d wanted to ask Cassandra anyway, though now she wouldn’t tell the woman that. “Keep an eye on us. Bring Varric, too. I want to pick his brain. So. When do we leave?” 

 

**“Yes. I’m quite ready as well,”** Dyna said, startling those at the table. She blew a puff of smoke and gave a large dragon smile that gave a clear view of all her teeth. 

 

“Well then. Let’s get ready. We’ll leave today,” Cassandra said, standing. There really was no time to lose. 

 

____

 

THE city was closer to the south of the country and it would take them a few hours to get there by car. 

 

“You won’t be needing the larger car,” Josephine said, her phone in her hand as she led them to the garage. “Since Dyna and Audri are the only dragons going. I’ve let them know to expect you. They’ve seemed to have cooled off a bit. They’re ready to speak with you. Please don’t harm each other on the way.” 

 

Ursa looked over the sour faced Cassandra who was glaring at Varric and blew out a breath. “Wish me luck,” she said. 

 

Josephine looked delighted at the interaction and smiled with a small laugh. “I do. I truly do.” 

 

“Ms. Montilyet, it is a true delight to see you once more and I look forward to many more meetings,” Dorian said, kissing Josephine’s hand. 

 

She laughed and swatted at him. “Go charm them, it’s wasted on me.” 

 

“I don’t think it is,” Dorian said with a wink. He ducked into the car and waited until Audri climbed into the dragon seat behind him before closing the door. Cassandra took the wheel while Ursa jumped into the passenger seat with Dyna on her lap, leaving Varric to sit with Dorian. 

 

There was a stale silence as Cassandra started the car. It made Ursa itch. She looked into the rearview mirror and caught Dorian’s eye. He nodded and she reached with a brightly glowing left hand for the radio dial. 

 

Josephine was ready to hurry away when she heard the radio begin to blare. She paused, unsure if she’d ever heard serious Cassandra listen to music. It took only a moment for her to recognize the song and when she did, she began to cackle. Shaking her head, she headed back into the Keep. 

 

“This is going to be an interesting year,” she commented to herself as the car pulled away and the blaring music drifted away. 

 

Inside the car everyone was silent for a long minute. Finally, Cassandra burst out, “I  _ hate  _ the Proclaimers.” 

 

____

 

WHEN they poured from the car Cassandra could feel nothing but relief. Varric and Dorian had been fast friends, singing loudly with whatever Ursa turned the radio to.  Cassandra had gritted her teeth and watched the new Herald laugh and sing along. Dyna, the dragon they’d all been waiting for, bopped to the music as well and seemed to be keeping a running monologue to Ursa, if the random giggles and snorts were anything to go on. 

 

Cassandra couldn’t remember the last time she’d heard such unbridled laughter. Being a Seeker meant spending your time observing. It meant solving problems others could not. Laughter and fun weren’t a part of her job and she watched it with a detached sense of curiosity. She had never been given a chance to bond with a dragon and she envied the easy conversation between Ursa and Dyna. It was in the last hour that Ursa peeked back at a sleeping Dorian and at Varric who was typing furiously on his phone. She turned to Cassandra and said softly, 

 

“Do you want me here?” 

 

“Excuse me?” Cassandra asked in surprise. 

 

“Do you want me to help you. What you need aside. Do you  _ want  _ me here? I’m kind of tired of being places I’m not wanted. I’m not a fighter, not really. You’ll have to train me. I don’t know anything about anything outside of my own Keep. I’ll need to learn. I was always told I wasn’t...well that I wasn’t worth anything. Dorian and my friend back home, Sera, are the only ones who ever saw anything in me. I want to know what you see,” Ursa said seriously. 

 

Cassandra looked first at the young woman and then quickly at her now quiet dragon. She sighed. 

 

“I don’t know exactly what I see,” Cassandra confessed. “I want to see hope but I was wrong about you when we first found you. What else have I been wrong about? I can’t...I can’t make that mistake again. I won’t condemn you, if that’s what you’re asking.” 

 

“Can’t say I’m not glad to hear it,” Ursa said with a smirk. 

 

Cassandra huffed. It was as close to a laugh that Ursa thought she could get. 

 

“I am glad to have you here. Your help is very appreciated. You and your friend,” Cassandra said, though she sounded more dubious about Dorian. 

 

Ursa laughed. “You’ll get used to him. Dorian...he’s a good man. He just hasn’t had a lot of chances to show it.” 

 

“As long as he doesn’t make me listen to his atrocious taste in music,” Cassandra said. 

 

Ursa giggled and peeked back at her friend. His head had lolled back as he slept and his mouth fell open as he snorted. 

 

“Don’t tell him that. But I think we can manage it,” Ursa said. 

 

Cassandra nodded, trying to give the other woman a smile and succeeding slightly. Ursa shook her head with a small laugh and leaned back in her chair. 

 

“Wake us when we get there,” she said. Closing her eyes, she drifted into Dyna’s memories once more. 

 

___

 

The headquarters for the Glory of Scotland rested in the center of the city of Val Royeaux. The city itself seemed to be cast in gold and white and was tastefully lit from the outside. Cassandra pulled into the Glory parking lot and took a deep breath before waking the others. Ursa took the longest to pull from sleep and she yawned widely when Dorian poked her in the cheek. 

 

“Rise and shine, sleepy,” he said, “You have to go be a goddess.” 

 

Ursa batted his hand away and opened her eyes. “I don’t wanna,” she said petulantly. 

 

“I would if I could but I draw the line at wearing heels,” Dorian said seriously, though there was a curve to his lips. 

 

Ursa smacked his shoulder and slid from her seat, stretching onto her toes and allowing Dyna to stretch up onto her stomach before dropping down to all fours. 

 

“Let’s get this over with,” she said. 

 

Varric blew out a sigh and nodded in agreement. Cassandra led the way but they hadn’t made it through the gate before a woman in sanctioned rider gard stalked from the door. 

 

“You must be the self proclaimed “herald’,” she snapped as she got closer. Cassandra stepped in front of Ursa  at the sharp words but Ursa moved around her. She and Dyna had discussed this very outcome and she was ready to fight her own battles.

 

“I’m a self proclaimed Dalish worker. I’ve never claimed to be the herald of anything. I actually find the name ridiculous, myself,” she said, keeping the gaze of the woman in front of her. 

 

The woman didn’t back down. Instead she stepped forward. She was nearly a head taller than Ursa and her nametag read “Justice”. She sneered. 

 

“So you’re denying you were at the Conclave?” she asked nastily. 

 

Ursa looked at her in confusion. “I didn’t say that. How do those two things connect in any way? I’m not a goddess reincarnate so I must be lying about where I was three days ago?” 

 

“So you don’t deny that you’re the only living soul from the attack at the Conclave?” Justice snapped. 

 

“She’s like a particularly vicious chihuahua,” Dorian muttered. Audri snorted and Varric hid his laugh in a cough. 

 

“No...I don’t deny that. It’s true. I don’t know what happened there but I know I lived. This is Dyna. She was the egg there,” Ursa said, pushing Dyna forward with her foot. 

 

“You’re the dragonling? We’d heard you’d bonded with this woman. Is it true?” Justice asked. 

 

Dyna looked at the woman in disbelief. “ **Yes. I did. As you would be able to tell if you paid attention. Where are your superiors?”**

 

“They’re dead,” Justice said flatly. “As Rodrick must have told you, the Glory is trying to find a new leader. Justinia’s death was...sudden. We need a replacement and we don’t have time for charletons claiming to be gods.” 

 

Ursa threw up her hands. “So don’t have time for me. I don’t claim anything. Dyna doesn’t claim anything. We just want to make things better. We’re here because you ordered us to be and we were feeling generous. We thought just maybe, we could all help each other. If you have any thoughts on that, we’d love to hear them.” 

 

“Let us break your bond,” Justice said readily. Ursa reeled back and Dyna growled deep in her throat. This time when Cassandra stepped in front of them, Ursa let her. 

 

“Breaking the bond between a dragon and their rider is only saved for the most hopeless of cases,” Cassandra said, furious. 

 

“And this is hopeless. Don’t you see? We need the dragonling, not the woman,” Justice replied. 

 

“You’re monsters,” Dorian said. 

 

“Ah. The Tevinter rider who turned his back on his people. Forgive me if I don’t take your feelings to heart,” Justice said.

 

“I’m not sure you have one,” Dorian muttered. 

 

“Separating a human from their dragon could cause them to die or go Tranquil. You would doom an innocent to such a fate?” Cassandra asked in horror. 

 

“She is no innocent. She was there and yet she walks free. She must know something,” Justice said, unaffected by the horror around her. 

 

“I won’t allow that. I will help the Inquisition. I won’t give up Dyna for you,” Ursa said quietly. Dyna was in her mind, soothing the fear of loss and promising not to allow such a thing. 

 

“So then you too deny your place in the Glory,” Justice said stiffly. 

 

“If that is what it would take to belong to the Glory, I no longer want to,” Ursa replied. Her voice didn’t shake as she spoke though it was soft. 

 

Justice turned on her heel. “Don’t bother coming in. You are no longer welcome here. Leave before the Seekers get here or they’ll throw you out.” 

 

“The Seekers?” Cassandra said in surprise. 

 

“Yes. The people you left behind. It seems you’ve started a trend, Cassandra Pentaghast,” Justice said as she walked away. When the doors had shut behind her Ursa let out the breath she’d been holding.

 

“What a bitch,” Varric said. 

 

Ursa let the relieved laughter burble out as she slouched. 

 

“I can’t help but agree,” Cassandra said stiffly. 

 

“Why would the Seekers be here?” Dorian asked, looking back through the gate to where a group of men and women wearing red uniforms were marching through. 

 

“I don’t think they’re going to want to tell us either,” Varric said. 

 

Indeed it didn’t look like it. The head Seeker, an imposing man with a scowl and a widow’s peak, was stalking towards them. The closer he got the more his lip seemed to curl.

 

“Pentaghast,” he greeted sourly as if her name tasted poorly. 

 

“Seeker Lucius. What has called the Seekers to the city?” she asked. 

 

“Nothing that concerns you. You left the order to play with your band of misfits. How is life out there on the island of misfit toys?” he asked, his voice dripping with contempt. 

 

Cassandra stiffened but didn’t reply for a long moment. “Will you stand with the Glory?” 

 

Lucius snorted. “The Glory is failing. Old faithfuls stuck to an old ideal. No. The Seekers will stand as they always have. Above it all. Come. We have a meeting to attend.” 

 

The Seekers followed his long strides until he too disappeared behind the door. 

 

“We are not very popular,” Varric commented. 

 

“Sure know how to clear a room, though,” Dorian said. 

 

**“The Seekers stand above no one. That kind of power is a heady thing and not one to be used lightly. We need to watch them,”** Audri said and Dyna snorted her agreement. 

 

“Well. I think it’s time to go home,” Ursa said.

 

“No way. We’re in Val Royeaux. I’m going shopping first,” Dorian said. He linked his arm with Ursa’s and pulled her away. She followed, giggling. Her relief made her feel drunk and she let Dorian’s silly antics clear her mind. 

 

“That’s supposed to be the great savior of our time?” Varric said with an amused smirk, “I’ve got to say, the idea never quite matches the reality, does it?” 

 

Cassandra didn’t respond. She simply began to follow the two ahead of her following the glint of dragon scales in the sun. 

 

____

 

BACK in Haven Cullen cut down recruit after recruit with ruthless efficiency. It wasn’t a cheering notion.

 

“Perhaps they’ll have good news,” Leliana said from the sidelines. Ascomb snorted before Cullen could and the spymaster shrugged delicately. “If that’s not what’s bothering you, what is?” 

 

“She knows nothing. She’s untrained. She’ll be just as bad as those I’m training now, if not worse. Josephine is already compiling histories for her to work on. And somewhere in there she needs to close Fades, convince the people she’s trustworthy, and lead a revolution. I think we’re asking too much of a young woman who was a simple egg worker,” Cullen said. He wiped his forehead down with a towel and walked to where Leliana was leaning on the half wall of the training enclosure. 

 

“Do you think she’s trustworthy?” Leliana asked. She would have to be a fool to not see how the Commander was affected by the young woman but she was curious if the reaction was more than cosmetic. 

 

“I don’t think I can answer that after three days. Most of which she’s been sleeping,” Cullen retorted. 

 

“She has a trustworthy face,” Leliana said, testing the waters. 

 

“That means nothing,” Cullen dismissed.

 

“ **_She’s goading you. She wants you to confess to your attraction,”_ ** Anscomb murmured in shades of red in Cullen’s mind. The Commander shook off the thought. 

 

“I’ll reserve that judgement for when I may speak to her alone,” he told Leliana, ignoring his dragon’s laughter in his mind. 

 

Leliana looked down at her phone as it vibrated in her hand. “That might be sooner rather than later,” she said, “It seems they’re on their way back and none of them are happy.” 

 

Leliana sighed and ran her fingers through her hair as Cullen looked out over the landscape. 

 

“We didn’t expect any better,” he said finally. 

 

“No, but I’d hoped,” Leliana said softly. “Justinia...she believed in this. She spoke of it even before the Conclave, though she hoped it wouldn’t be necessary. Now the Glory stands to the side and pretends they’ve never heard the word. What are we doing if not fighting for peace?” 

 

Cullen shook his head and looked back at the recruits. He winced as a young man was thrown back by a wide swing of an ironcast blade. 

 

“You need to train her,” Leliana said.

 

“Why not the master?” Cullen asked, thinking of the man who trained the recruits when Cullen was simply too busy to leave his office. 

 

“You’re better. And you know what we’re fighting for. More intimately than most,” Leliana replied. 

 

Cullen rubbed the back of his neck. “I wouldn’t put it like that.”

 

“Cullen,” Leliana said frankly, “I would put it like that. You don’t need to tell her. Or anyone if you don’t wish to but you do know. We’ve all walked away from so much but you more than most. It has to be you to train her. You’re not our Commander for nothing.”

 

Having taken the last word, Leliana pushed off the wall and sauntered away. Cullen flexed his fingers before turning back to the recruits. They all had a long way to go. He had a suspicion that this fight would be a long run rather than a sprint and they all needed to build their stamina. 

 

____

 

JOSEPHINE, Leliana, and Cullen were waiting for them at the head of the garage when Cassandra parked the car. She let out a long suffering sigh before getting out of the car. As the others unloaded from the car their laughter reached across the garage. Just as it had struck Cassandra, it stunned those waiting as well. The four of them had been living the fight for months and laughter was something that had been pushed aside. Ursa had two bags on her arms while Dorian had at least four. Ursa pushed him with her shoulder as they walked and he stumbled, giving her a mock frown before smiling. Behind them, Dyna was climbing on Audri and the two dragons play fought as they moved.  Varric followed, his own smile mild as he typed furiously on his phone. There was so much life in the two friends and it struck them all. 

 

Josephine watched and felt a sense of grace at the way the two moved together. It was rare to see two people so happy to just be in the same space. They weren’t paying attention to what was around them or the people they were walking towards. When Josephine looked at Leliana she saw the same stunned expression she was sure she was also sporting. 

 

“She’s so young,” Leliana said. She was no doubt remembering the days when she’d laughed and been carefree like the two in front of them. 

 

Josephine looked past Leliana to see Cullen’s expression. Unlike Leliana who looked surprised, Cullen had become more stoic. If Josephine hadn’t known the man she’d have thought he was upset but she understood what he thought he was hiding. Shaking her head, she stepped forward to meet them. 

 

“Did you have a good trip?” she asked. 

 

“Not remotely,” Ursa said, snorting at whatever Dyna whispered in her mind. 

 

“It seems you went shopping,” Josephine said, nodding to the bags. 

 

“Oh, well yes. Dorian said it could be the highlight of a shitty trip. Though I doubt Cassandra agrees,” Ursa said, turning to look at the Seeker behind her. 

 

Cassandra stopped beside them. “The Glory asked us to allow a breaking of their bond,” she said. 

 

Ursa felt only relief when the three people in front of her reared back in shock and horror. She’d worried they might support the decision. 

 

“What?” Josephine asked on a whisper. 

 

“They wanted to take Dyna but not me. They wanted to break our bond,” Ursa said. She let herself be soothed by Dyna’s warmth around her legs. They still shook at the thought but Dyna spoke fiercely in her mind.

 

**_“They won’t take me from you. We’re soul bond. Speak with the Commander. He’ll assure you as well. I can feel his horror at the idea from here.”_ **

 

Ursa nodded, her eyes catching the Commander’s. For once he didn’t look away. 

 

“That is not in anyone’s best interest,” he said firmly. 

 

“No. I’m shocked they even suggested it. That can ruin a person. They could lose every emotion that makes them who they are. The more intensely bonded the pair is, the worse the break can be. We won’t allow such a desperate measure to be achieved. Not when you two so clearly belong together,” Leliana said, peering down at Dyna. 

 

“I don’t think they cared about what it would do to me,” Ursa confessed. She sounded shaken by that so Dorian put his arm around her shoulders. 

 

“I do. It seems these guys do too. Don’t worry. We’ll protect you,” he said. 

 

Ursa looked up to see the group around her nodding. She felt tears form but she blinked them back. She refused to cry over something that hadn’t happened. 

 

“ **_It’s alright. You’ll come to love these people. They’ll become your family. This is your place, Ursa. It’s our home,”_ ** Dyna said, soothing tones of earth green and brown sliding smoothly across her mind. 

 

“Come along,” Josephine said kindly, “We’ll discuss our next step.” 

 

___

 

THE next step ended up being sending Ursa out with Solas, Varric, and Cassandra to help establish camps across the country. 

 

“There are many rifts opening. Put those on top of the fighting happening between the feral and tame factions and the people in these lands are displaced. In the Hinterlands alone we’ve seen mass migration and the opening of at least 15 new rifts. Your job is going to be to close the rifts and make the people feel safe again,” Leliana explained as they stood around the large, oak table. They were in a dimly lit room with a map spread across the table in front of them that they’d begun to call the “war room”.  It was the room Ursa had found the group in just the day before and it was beginning to feel familiar. Josephine pointed at spots on the map where they’d found Fade rifts and explained where Ursa would be sent first. 

 

“We need to establish bases across the range,” Josephine said. “There are ideal spots spanning the countryside but there are rifts and skirmishes between them. I’m afraid most of that area has no real roads so you’ll be walking once you reach the border. That will allow you to meet the people and get a more intimate idea of their pain. The more you help, the more influence we’ll have in the region which means more favors when we need them most.”

 

“Our soldiers are having a hard time taking on both sides. Usually we’d have the Glory behind us but now they don’t exactly go out of their way to be kind,” Cullen said. “We’ve been run ragged by the fights and we’re spread thin. Most of our new recruits are green young men hoping to spot the Herald of Andraste and maybe have some adventures. They’re not ready for the fight they have in store.” 

 

“Do they need help? I’m not trained in fighting very much. Egg guards aren’t exactly on the front lines,” Ursa confessed. 

 

“Cullen will train you,” Josephine said, causing both Cullen and Ursa to look surprised, “In fact I have it scheduled for an hour from now. Just some basics for before you leave. The scouts have been told to expect you in the next few days so we have some time to get you ready before you’re going to have to leave.”

 

“Alright,” Ursa said hesitantly. 

 

“ **_Don’t worry. He’s as scared as you are,”_ ** Dyna laughed.  **_“You scare him shitless. It’s cute.”_ **

 

Ursa made a face at her dragon who coyly whipped her tail. 

 

“What about Dorian?” she asked, realizing she wasn’t going to be traveling with her friend when she left. 

 

“He’s going to stay here and help train the troops. Apparently he also disparages our library? He’s asked for more tomes to help you learn a more complete history,” Josephine said. 

 

“Dorian’s a huge book nerd,” Ursa said with a smile. “He reads to feel comfort.” 

 

“Well we’ve given him access to all of our archives and he’ll be helping our less experienced riders learn to fight from dragonback,” Josephine stated.

 

Ursa couldn’t help but smile more widely. Maybe her friend would finally begin to fit in. 

 

“That sounds good for him,” she said. 

 

“Commander, what do you require our herald to wear to her lesson?” Josephine asked. Ursa looked up at the sly tone the woman had adopted and watched with interest as Cullen’s eyes swept to Ursa and then quickly away. He seemed to fight the red that crawled up his face as he rubbed the back of his neck. 

 

“Something you don’t mind getting dirty,” he muttered. 

 

Ursa looked down at the outfit Dorian had picked out. The boots were starting to hurt her toes but the rest was comfortable and none of it was hers. 

 

“Do you think the Rage would send me my stuff?” she yelled out the door to Dorian. She wasn’t fooled. He may not have been invited in but he was waiting outside for her. He pushed open the door and sauntered in, ignoring the glares from Leliana, Cassandra, and Cullen. 

 

He made a face at Ursa when she repeated the question. “Why would you want it back?” 

 

“Dorian,” Ursa said, lifting her eyebrow so he sighed. 

 

“Call Sera. I’m sure she can bring it by. Anything to get out of the Keep,” he offered. 

 

Ursa grinned. “She did say she’d give my right arm for a chance to leave. I suppose I’ve given my left.” 

 

“She’ll be delighted,” Dorian said dryly. “Now, if you no longer need me, there’s a red wine calling my name.” 

 

“It’s only 4 in the afternoon,” Ursa said.

 

“Exactly. I’m very behind,” he said, leaving the room in the same unconcerned way he’d entered. They all watched him go, Ursa closing the door behind him. 

 

“Well then. I’m ready if you are, Commander,” she said, grinning at Cullen. 

 

He looked taken aback by the curve of her lips and nodded. “Give me a few minutes. I’ll meet you in the ring.” 

 

“ **_Let’s show them who’s boss,”_ ** Dyna said, hopping and spitting a glob of green light. 

 

Ursa smiled. “Alright. I’ll be there in a minute.” 

 

____

 

**_“Very smooth,”_ ** Anscomb said, his voice rich burgundy and navy blue. There was a hint of white to show the laughter he was holding in. 

 

“ _ Don’t. It’s nothing,”  _ Cullen replied silently as he made his way down to the practice ring. He shrugged off his cloak and leaned back against the wall. There were some recruits swinging swords and a few were practicing shooting large targets. The sounds were soothing to Cullen who leaned his head back and closed his eyes for a moment. 

 

“ **_She is quite attractive,”_ ** Anscomb said. 

 

_ “She’s young. A pure soul. And she’s with that man, Dorian,”  _ Cullen replied. 

 

Anscomb was once more surprised by how off his soul bound partner could be. But then, Cullen had always been good at denying himself things. He’d watched too many good things turn sour to believe in love anymore. He didn’t believe he deserved it, even if it was looking him right in the face. 

 

**_“That’s not true and you know it.  That man is more interested in your backside than hers. But that’s not what’s bothering you. You do deserve kindness, Cullen. You even deserve love. Maybe if you’d give her a chance you could have it,”_ ** Anscomb said softly. 

 

Cullen loved his dragon’s voice. The reds, golds, and blues were always so soothing. He relaxed back against the wall even more and let out a deep sigh. 

 

_ “How do you know? Such a thing...I fear it's beyond me now. Who would want to lie beside a monster?”  _

 

“ **_Oh Cullen...you’re not a monster,”_ ** Anscomb sighed. 

 

Cullen seemed ready to reply when they heard the click of heels on the stone walkway. 

 

“Dyna says the heels are stupid and they probably are but honestly whoever filled that closet didn’t give me many options,” Ursa said as she came into sight. She’d pulled her loose hair into a braid and the eyeliner Dorian had smudged under her eyes was wiped away. Cullen studied the tattoo on her face as she frowned down at her boots. He liked her face unclouded. There was an old scar on her forehead he longed to ask about but he held it in. 

 

“ **Indeed. There isn’t much variation in that closet. But your friend Sera is very excited to bring your things even if she has to break out of her Keep,”** Dyna said. 

 

**“Dyna. We haven’t had a chance to speak since you’ve arrived. How have you found Haven? I’m sure it isn’t what you were given as an image of your birth, but you seem to be taking it in stride,”** Anscomb said. 

 

“ **It is a wonderful home. There are so many wonderful people and dragons here. I’ve spoken to many of them. Though I did regret not speaking with you sooner. Shall we sit out while they practice? I’d love to hear about your family and home Keep,”** Dyna replied. 

 

Both Cullen and Ursa stiffened at the question but Anscomb seemed unconcerned. They’d both assumed their dragons would join them in the ring. It was a daunting to think that Ursa and Cullen would be truly alone for the first time without their dragons. 

 

“ **That sounds very pleasant. Yes. Let’s. Join me on the heated rocks in the barracks? We can have our conversation there,”** Anscomb said. 

 

Dyna nodded, nudged Ursa’s legs with her head, and then followed the older dragon from the ring. 

 

“Anscomb is beautiful,” Ursa said when the dragons were gone from view. “Where did you get him?” 

 

“He was at a hatching in the city. There were very few eggs that year and the tickets were very highly priced but my parents scraped together the money to take me. My father waited outside while I went in. They knew how much I wanted to be a rider. I used to beg the riders around our home to teach me anything they could. Anscomb was the third egg hatched and I just knew. I’m not sure you’ll know the feeling since your own bonding was so unconventional but it felt as if there was nothing more right in the world. I could see nothing but him and when he marked me I felt my fate seal. We were locked in a room together for three days, though it took five for us to feel able to function. I was...impressed with the way you managed to work with us on your third day. Not many riders are even able to speak aloud on their third day and you were very much alive. You even let us talk your ear off about something you hadn’t ever planned to be a part of. But I’m sorry, I’m sure you didn’t come here for a lecture on dragon bonding,” Cullen said, catching himself. He wasn’t used to speaking so much about himself but Anscomb was the one subject he felt hadn’t been sullied by his bad choices. 

 

“No, I didn’t but if you have one prepared I’m more than happy to listen,” Ursa said, smiling up at him. 

 

Cullen blinked. “Oh. Um. Maybe another time,” he said. 

 

She chuckled and stepped into the ring. “Okay then. Show me what I’m here for.” 

 

___

 

TWO hours later Ursa was a sweaty and bruised mess and Cullen was looking smug. She found she liked the look on him even if she’d never confess it. She slumped back against the wall and sucked down water from the cup a recruit had brought her. 

 

“You’re doing well,” Cullen said, coming to her side and taking his own water. 

 

“How come all you have is a glisten and I feel like I’ve lost half my body weight in sweat?” she groaned. 

 

Cullen couldn’t help but smile at the comment. “I’ve trained for this. You haven’t. When I started I was just as gross as you are.” 

 

“So you think I’m gross, I’m glad my suspicions were correct,” Ursa flirted with a smile. 

 

“I don’t...I didn’t mean...dragon talons!” Cullen stuttered. 

 

Ursa laughed. “I was kidding, Cullen.” 

 

He blushed and rubbed the back of his neck, a nervous habit, Ursa was noticing. He was saved by Anscomb and Dyna coming back into the training ring chattering to themselves about their respective families and histories.

 

“ **How did it go?”** Anscomb asked. 

 

“I’m not dead,” Ursa said dryly. 

 

“ **You are sweaty. You need a shower. Come on. Let’s go,”** Dyna said. 

 

“ **_You can flirt with Cullen more later,”_ ** the dragon added in Ursa’s head. 

 

“ _ I was not flirting!”  _ Ursa cried out in her own mind. She was surprised when Dyna snorted. 

 

“ **_Very good. I was wondering when you’d be able to reply to me silently. Come on. We’ll go get clean and you can tell me more about how you didn’t flirt with the good looking Commander,”_ ** Dyna teased. 

 

“We’re going to shower,” Ursa said loudly. She offered Cullen her hand and after a moment of hesitation, he took it. “Thank you. It was enlightening. I’m sure you have other important things to be doing so I’m grateful. Perhaps Josephine will plan another one of these soon. I’m looking forward to losing another 10 pounds.” 

 

Cullen chuckled. “You did well,” he said, squeezing her hand slightly before letting go. “I’ll look forward to it.”

 

Ursa nodded and turned to go, her hand on Dyna’s back as she limped away. 

 

“ **_You look forward to it?”_ ** Anscomb said slyly. 

 

“Shut up,” Cullen said eloquently before turning back to the training ring. “Now, the rest of you, on your feet!” 


	4. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa goes to the Hinterlands and finds her power. Vivienne is recruited. Cullen finds out the truth about Dorian and Ursa.

Chapter 4

 

THE Hinterlands were rural. That was the diplomatic way to put it. Ursa, carrying a small pistol, a hand axe, and a long iron blade, wiped sweat from her brow with the back of her arm. She’d closed her fourth Fade rift of the trip and they were only three days in. She’d managed to find a missing woman’s remains and a letter to her lover which had been awful but it wasn’t as bad as fighting the rogue tamed dragons and their dazed riders. She’d killed four men and their dragons with her own hands and had thrown up after each one. Cullen had done his job. He’d given her some efficient moves that had saved her last minute but she was most thankful for Cassandra. The seeker dove into fights with grim determination and protected Ursa when her sparse skills failed. 

 

Solas was helpful when it came to Dyna’s abilities and the subsequent abilities that Ursa carried. He’d shout of words in dragon tongue that seemed raw and ancient but green fire would burst from Ursa’s hand or Dyna’s eyes would glow and she’d find a new ability flowing from her mouth. He kept her safe within her own body and brushed off any thanks she tried to give him. 

 

Varric carried a well kept crossbow that he named Bianca. He said Hawke, his dragon, loved to race the bolts and would sometimes light them for him when they fought together. He kept the same standard pistol on his hip that Ursa had but he rarely touched it. Bianca reminded him of his dragon who it was clear he missed. Though Hawke was too small to make Varric a true rider, they were used as rogues. Ursa liked rogue riders. Sera was one and Ursa had a healthy respect for them. Their abilities were more sneaky and smooth. They might be in the background but they were powerful when utilized. 

 

After the fourth Fade rift was closed, she sat down on a nearby boulder and coughed on the dust they’d kicked up.

 

“You know, I’ve never been here and now I can fully see why no one ever brought it up. Who lives here, anyway? It’s like we’re in the middle of nowhere,” Ursa said. 

 

Cassandra sat beside her and offered her a flask of water. As Ursa sipped, Cassandra looked around their surroundings. 

 

“It’s mostly farm lands. We’ve used some of their fields for training recruits and riders. The people who live here have done so for generations and wouldn’t know another life. To them, tamed dragons are the unusual sight. There are many small, feral factions in this area but they generally work well with the population,” Cassandra explained. 

 

“So if they work well with the factions, why do they seem so happy to see us?” Ursa queried. 

 

“Fade magic makes untamed dragons more wild. It’s magic is raw and it brings them back to their original state. If you walked into the Fade you might come out a full elf even though you’ve had many generations to dilute it. Fade magic reverts us back to our most primal,” Solas said. 

 

“ **I don’t like the word tamed,”** Dyna said, “ **It makes us sound as if we’ve lost something. Dragons who have chosen this life haven’t given up anything. They’ve gained. It’s what my father’s kind doesn’t understand. We aren’t tamed or domesticated. We’ve simply decided to embrace the world Andraste opened to us.”**

 

Solas inclined his head to the young dragon who fluttered her wings in return. “Perhaps, but to them you are tamed. You have broken by the human spirit. It may not be the truth to you but a single truth hardly fits everyone.” 

 

“I’m wondering how long we need to be out here,” Varric muttered. “My publisher has been screaming at me for some new stories and while this is all riveting, I need to write. I’m also sick of the dirt.” 

 

“Josephine keeps sending me a list of things we should do. From the looks of it we could be here for a year,” Ursa said, peering down into her phone where the list of tasks kept growing. 

 

“Well we only have enough supplies for three weeks,” Cassandra commented, “So it can’t be past that.” 

 

“Great,” Varric groaned. 

 

“You didn’t need to come,” Cassandra snapped.

 

“But I think I did. I was “invited” and I’m sure it wasn’t a suggestion,” Varric replied. 

 

Ursa had grown tired of the bickering between Varric and Cassandra. Groaning, she stood. 

 

“I’m going to take a walk,” she said.

 

“We’re heading back to camp soon. It’ll be dark in an hour or so,” Solas warned but he looked as if he too wanted to escape. 

 

“I’ll be back,” Ursa promised. Dyna stood and followed. In her first week Dyna hadn’t grown much but her speech was smoother both aloud and in Ursa’s mind. As they walked, Ursa pondered her dragon’s uniquely colored speech. 

 

“Sera told me once Red Jenny spoke in shades of yellow and I didn’t fully get it. I think I do now. You’re mostly green and browns. Do you all choose a voice your partner will like?” she asked Dyna.

 

The dragon snorted in laughter. 

 

**“It’s my voice. We choose our partners based on who they are so we complement them. Have you ever been to a hatching?”** Dyna asked. Though she could search Ursa’s mind, she had yet to tell the woman that and she refused to delve into her mind without consent. 

 

“I’ve been to many but never as a spectator. I cleared the opened eggs and sometimes got caught in the middle of little ones trying to break out. I was never there to find a partner,” Ursa said. She kicked a small stone so it bounced along the dirt path. 

 

“ **If you were meant to partner with any of those dragons you would have. It wouldn’t have mattered. We feel your minds inside our eggs. Especially those that care for us. We choose a few options in the ring and when the time comes, we call them. I always knew it would be you. My birth was not as I expected but I was always meant to find you. You were able to bond so late in life because you were meant to bond with me. I couldn’t put you in a coma or break your mind because I’m the piece you’ve been missing,”** Dyna said. She flicked Ursa’s leg with her tail and huffed when the woman jumped. 

 

“How could I have been made for you? Dragons can’t control time or life like that,” Ursa said, sounding unsure. She’d seen so many impossible things since the Conclave. It was hard to believe it had only been a week since that fateful day. She couldn’t imagine her life without Dyna. She’d nearly forgotten what it felt like to be alone in her head. 

 

**“We don’t control anything but we can see. We can see the paths. There are many paths for us to possibly follow but you were never a choice. You simply were. I can’t say why. Memories can only tell us so much. They blur with each generation. Perhaps they orchestrated your birth. Maybe you are chosen by Andraste. We’ll never know. But you mustn’t focus on that anymore. You need to look to the future. We can’t ponder why, we must instead look at how. How will we win this war? Who will help us? Who do we trust?”** Dyna said reasonably. 

 

Ursa thought of the newest people in her life. Cassandra who had shown many times that she was willing to protect Ursa from harm without thought for herself. Josephine who sent her cute puppy videos as if she knew when Ursa was at the end of her rope. Leliana whose reports were concise and helpful and who always looked sad. Varric who, when he was alone with Ursa, was friendly and kind. Solas, who knew so much about the history of dragons and looked so excited anytime Ursa asked a question about it. Cullen...the steadfast Commander who had shown her little mercy when teaching her to fight but who had smiled at her afterwards. Who she couldn’t seem to stop looking for whenever she walked into a crowded room. 

 

“It’s been a week. I’m not sure I trust anyone yet,” Ursa lied.

 

“ **Liar,”** Dyna smirked but she didn’t push the subject. She knew Ursa had never known a true family. Her own hadn’t wanted her around much. They had once been a proud Dalish family with a bloodline that went back to ancient times. They’d married their own and their children had become riders or farmers. Though Ursa was not the child of a crossed union she was the one who gained most of the traits from her family’s shame. Coupled with her gentle and quiet nature she had stuck out and they had shunned her for it. Trust was not something the woman came by easily and to admit that for the first time in her life she felt safe would mean admitting that she never had before. Dyna wasn’t cruel. Here, so far from anything Ursa had known, was not the place to make the woman admit her quiet truths. 

 

Ursa didn’t reply. She kicked another stone and startled when something growled behind her. She turned slowly, half expecting a bear. They’d crossed the paths of many bears. Solas had skinned the first three but had since given up. There was only so much fur four people could carry. 

 

It wasn’t a bear. 

 

Ursa’s breath came in short spurts as she faced a full grown feral dragon. It’s mouth was wide open so she could see rows of red, pointed teeth. It was a larger class dragon and towered over Ursa’s slight form. Dyna growled but it was a small sound next to the large dragon’s breathing. 

 

“Oh fuck,” Ursa breathed. 

 

“ **We can do this,”** Dyna said. It sounded like a question and Ursa tightened her hand on the blade sitting on her hip. 

 

“Right. Savior. Herald of Andraste. We can do this,” she muttered. Her hand sparked green light so she flexed it along the hilt. 

 

The bright red dragon in front of her screamed. It was a fire breathing dragon. That meant burning, but only if she stayed in one place for too long.  Ursa dove under the creature’s stomach as it inhaled deeply. She rotated with it as it tried to reach her. 

 

“Any ideas?” she asked in a panic. 

 

“ **Don’t die,”** Dyna replied. She tried to stay close to Ursa’s feet and studied the other dragon’s movements. 

 

“That was the main plan. Glad we’re on the same page,” Ursa said shakily. She gripped the blade tightly, squeezed her eyes shut, and used all of her strength to shove the blade upward into the dragon’s belly. 

 

The feral creature screamed so loudly the trees shook. Ursa fell to her knees covering her ears as the dragon lifted off the ground. It’s acidic blood dripped at her feet, hissing as it hit the cool ground. The dragon turned on her. Ursa’s ears were ringing. She could hear Cassandra cry out to her. She could feel Dyna in her mind. She could taste her own terror. But as the dragon opened wide jaws and red began to build in its throat, a calm fell over her. 

 

Good, child. Breathe. Feel me. You’re safe. Repeat these words.  **Hashaves Koosavel Des.**

 

Ursa didn’t know where the voice came from but she repeated the words. She couldn’t hear her own voice and she hoped her lungs hadn’t collapsed as she spoke. The fire was building. She could feel the heat. The dragon would roast her in seconds. She closed her eyes on the final syllable and waited to die. 

 

The heat was excruciating but it was enough to make Ursa open her eyes. The flames had burst around her and the dragon looked confused. Feral dragons didn’t speak dragon tongue but Dyna hissed at whatever the dragon had sent along.

 

“ **She knows who we are. She wants to kill us. Whatever you did, keep it up. We’re going to need it,”** Dyna said. 

 

Ursa looked at the treeline where the others were standing. 

 

“Run! She cried out, hoping they would understand. She didn’t know where the ability had come from but she hoped they would continue. “Run!” she screamed again when they hadn’t moved. 

 

Cassandra shook her head and hefted her fireguard shield in front of her, drawing her blade. Varric pulled Bianca up and Solas steadied himself, a slim blade pulled from his back pocket. Ursa’s eyes widened and she shook her head but they were already making their way down to where the dragon stood. 

 

“ **If you have any other tricks up your sleeve, now is the time,”** Dyna said desperately. 

 

Ursa didn’t know how she’d known those words. She watched, her gaze ticking between the snarling dragon and her party. The dragon would tear them apart in a moment if she did nothing. Closing her eyes she did something she’d never done before. She prayed. 

 

When her eyes opened they were glowing green. Dyna felt a surge of power and rose up onto her hind legs. She too could feel what she needed to do. 

 

“ _ Now,”  _ Ursa said in their minds. Together, dragon and woman opened their mouths and screamed. 

 

____

 

“SHE killed a feral. By screaming. Cassandra’s email is...confusing to say the least,” Leliana said. She was sitting in Josephine’s office with her feet up on the desk while Josephine typed quickly on her laptop. Cullen brooded in the corner, watching his feet. 

 

“It seems one found her when she went on a walk. Cassandra says they heard it scream when Ursa stabbed it. When they got there the dragon was about to burn them but Ursa said something and a green shield appeared. After that the dragon turned on them. They were ready to fight for her but she and Dyna screamed and it just...crumpled. It was a class 4 fire dragon and it just fell from the sky. Cassandra explains it as a green echo. Ursa’s eyes went bright green like the Fade rifts and she passed out immediately after,” Leliana continued.

 

“Are they coming back?” Josephine asked. 

 

Leliana shook her head. “It seems Ursa thinks they could still do some good out there. Word got around very quickly from that incident. They’re staying the three weeks.”

 

Cullen shifted his weight. “Is she alright?” he asked. Anscomb nodded and added, “ **It might be foolish to keep going if she’s unwell. We’d rather like her to make it to the end of all this.”**

 

“Cassandra’s report says she was fine once she’d woken up. Confused and couldn’t explain where it came from, but alright. There’s been renewed interest in her across the Hinterlands. She has become a beacon of hope. The longer she stays out there, the better it is for us. She is truly their Herald now.” 

 

A knock came on the door jam and the three turned to see Dorian and Audri.

 

“You’ve heard from Ursa?” he asked, his lips a worried and drawn line. 

 

“Cassandra. Have you heard from the Herald?” Josephine asked.

 

“She doesn’t like that name,” he said almost absently. He looked down at his phone. “Yes. She’s confused but she’s staying out there. Is that wise? She just had another surge of power she doesn’t understand. I’m not sure she knows her limits here. I’ve grown used to codependency. I’d rather not have to learn to live without it now.” 

 

Josephine shared a look with Leliana before addressing Dorian. “She’s fine. She says so. Cassandra says so. We can’t make her come back, can you?” 

 

Dorian huffed. “If I could make her do anything I would’ve made her dress better by now.” 

 

“Exactly,” Josephine said with a smile. “The Herald will stay out in the field for three weeks and when she returns both of you can scold her for not knowing her limits.”

 

Dorian looked over at Cullen before shaking his head and turning to go. Audri dipped her head to the room as she followed him out. They waited until Dorian and Audri had left to laugh, leaving Cullen to shift uncomfortably. 

 

“You two should have a competition for who’s a bigger mother hen,” Josephine said. 

 

“I’m not...dragon’s talons, it isn’t  _ safe  _ out there even at your best. It can’t be smart to do it when you aren’t,” he protested.

 

“I’d argue that she’s better equipped than even you, Commander,” Leliana offered. 

 

“She does seem to have unseen abilities. Solas’ email was just him ranting about all the possibilities of them. I’m sure she’s being safe, Cullen,” Josephine said. 

 

Cullen didn’t find that a major comfort but nodded nonetheless. He ignored Anscomb’s snide comments and settled back against the wall to listen to the rest of the reports. 

 

____

 

“THAT was reckless! You aren’t indestructible!” Cassandra scolded as Ursa limped, grinning, back up the hill. 

 

“Oh please. It was just another bear,” Ursa scoffed. They’d been in the Hinterlands for nearly two and a half weeks and she’d felt that she’d killed enough bears for a lifetime. It really wasn’t her fault. Once they got a scent, they followed and would attack at the most inopportune moments if they weren’t killed upon sight. Ursa felt that she’d grown quite proficient at hunting bears. She might still get sick at the idea of human death and she may still feel out of her depth when it came to this “Herald” business but bears she had down. 

 

It was why she’d felt comfortable pulling both her blade and her axe from her belt and launching herself off the hilltop to get the bear from above. She’d made quick work of it, knowing by now where she needed to hit to take the animal down quickly. 

 

“10 Fade rifts, 15 people and 10 dragons and over 30 bears. I’m a veteran at this point,” Ursa joked. 

 

Cassandra softened at the words. The young woman had never been trained to fight. While they all pretended not to hear her scream in her sleep or cry herself sick, they knew what it felt like. She’d helped many people along the way but it was the deaths that stayed with you. Cassandra shook her head. 

 

“Just try to be more careful. The Inquisition would kill me if I let something happen to you,” she said. 

 

“Please. It’s not like any of you chose me,” Ursa said, rolling her eyes. 

 

“ **I did,”** Dyna said.

 

Ursa patted the dragon’s head. “Other than you, Dyna.”

 

“We may not have chosen you but we’re glad to have you,” Solas said. 

 

Ursa inclined her head at him, pulling her headphones from her pocket. The immediate danger was over. The others fanned out around her, knowing that when she plugged in, it was because she needed a break. She let her head fall backwards as she inhaled deeply. Over the few weeks she’d known her travel companions she’d come to trust and rely on them. Even now she could feel them watching the woods around them for any signs of danger. They had protected her too many times to count and she’d begun to think of them as tremulous friends. 

 

Her head bobbed slowly to the music filling her ears. She watched her nearly ruined sneakers kick up dirt and let herself relax into her body. She knew they watched her. Knew they heard her cry at night. She was grateful that they never spoke of it. Sometimes she’d wake to warmed tea or cold water by her tent opening and she would suck it down like she’d been in a drought for years. They were doting without being suffocating and helpful when she asked for it. Still, she longed for a bed in a room that she didn’t need to share. She missed Dorian’s easy laughter and couldn’t wait to leave in the morning to return to Haven. 

 

“ **_Are you excited to go home?”_ ** Dyna asked. 

 

“ _ Yes. I miss Dorian. And Sera says she’s bored. She’s tried all the beer and wine and now just wants something fun to do,”  _ Ursa replied. 

 

“ **_And our handsome Commander?”_ ** Dyna asked slyly.

 

“ _ Stop it. You know it’s not like that,”  _ Ursa chided.

 

“ **_I’m in your dreams,”_ ** Dyna chuckled, “ **_I see when you think of him. You might not wish to admit it yet, but you’re excited to see him again. Besides, you think of Haven as home now. That’s all I truly wanted to hear.”_ **

 

_ “Sneaky little dragon,”  _ Ursa replied. 

 

Dyna laughed so smoke puffed out of her nose. They walked the rest of the way quietly, enjoying the music and the company around them. 

 

____

 

HAVEN was filled to the brim with people when they returned. Ursa looked on uneasily as people bowed to her and fell quiet when she walked by. She’d grown used to the comfort level of her travel companions and she felt uncomfortable with the amount of reverence being shown. The feeling eased when Dorian walked out of the large Keep doors. 

 

The encampment around the Keep was where most of those in the Inquisition stayed. There were many huts and small houses built around the large building. Riders stayed in the barracks but most others slept outside of the Keep itself. Ursa had to run a good distance to reach her friend but in her weeks away, her stamina had improved. Even with the heavy weapons on her and a light coat of armor, she made it across the grounds without pausing. She threw herself into his arms with a squeal. 

 

“Dorian!”

 

“Ursa!” 

 

They hugged tightly, both in relief. It wasn’t the first time they’d been apart for so long. It was far from the last but it felt like a homecoming even still. Next to them, Audri and Ursa hugged in their own way. Necks and wings entwined so the royal purple and green formed a writhing mass. Ursa felt more than saw the others join them but still she didn’t let go.

 

“You stink,” Dorian said into her shoulder.

 

“Shut up. I’ve been outside for 3 weeks,” she replied, her words muffled by his shirt. 

 

“All the more reason for you to shower,” he said, finally pulling away. He kept his arms around her waist and looked at her with unabashed affection. She grinned back.

 

“I will. But no doubt Josie has something she wants to share and I’m sure there’s some new information from Leliana and I bet even Commander Rutherford has some tidbit he’d like to tell me. Am I right?” she asked, looking past Dorian to the three standing behind him. 

 

They all nodded in varying degrees of amusement. She stepped away from Dorian and put her hands on her hips. 

 

“Very well. Lead the way. If you don’t mind the smell, that is,” she said. She ignored the people chattering behind her and looked resolutely at her advisers. 

 

“I see you’ve accepted your position here,” Dorian said in amusement.

 

“Killing 50 bears will do that to you. Also people thanking you. Incessantly. No one even called me knife ear,” Ursa said sunnily. 

 

The words made the three walking in front of her pause and she noted there reaction with interest. 

 

“That’s a step,” Dorian replied. As they reached the war room doors he stopped. “‘Fraid I stop here, bear.”

 

Ursa wanted to protest but she knew it would do no good. Dorian was helpful but not one to help with decisions. She smiled at him and squeezed his hand. She didn’t see Cullen study the motion or the way his face spasmed before smoothing over. She turned back to the group and gave them a grim smile.

 

“Let’s go to work.” 

 

____

 

SIX hours after returning to Haven, Ursa finally sank into a bath. She moaned in quiet joy as the water eased her sore muscles. Solas had given her an herb bundle that would help ease the tension in her body and she’d accepted gratefully.Josephine had promised to order bath bombs but until then, the herbs would have to do. After a long ride back to Haven, a three hour meeting with her advisers, and a long conversation with Sera, it was dark out and she could see her breath in the dimly lit walk to her hut. Fall was coming on them quickly.  She’d denied an escort from Cullen. She was too exhausted to even speak and she didn’t want to seem rude though she could have sworn he’d looked disappointed at her answer. As she soaked in the tub she replayed her conversations in her head.

 

**_“Going over it isn’t going to make it any easier. Relax,”_ ** Dyna said. Her tail swished quietly on the hut floor. Dorian had installed a portable heat pad and Dyna had sunk onto it with a pleased sigh when she’d seen it. 

 

“ _ A ball invite from a Glory sanctioned rider. More Fade rifts. A decision to make about who to meet with because heaven forbid both sides work together. More training with Cullen. Lessons with Josephine. Lessons with Solas. I’m never going to relax again,”  _ Ursa replied. 

 

Dyna looked over at the bed. Dorian was curled up with Audri. The man looked more vulnerable in his sleep. He was a truly beautiful specimen but he put up such an act that it worried Dyna. Someday it would crack and she worried when he did it would take Ursa down with him. She was starting to love him just as her partner did but love wasn’t always enough. Her own father had killed her mother once she’d been laid, his nature too much for him to overcome. Ursa had a long way to go. It was going to be winter soon and they had a long way to go to see the sun of spring. 

 

“If we live through this...how long will I live now?” Ursa asked abruptly. 

 

**“Many, many years,”** Dyna replied. 

 

“How long is the average?” she asked.

 

“Over 100 years,” Dorian answered sleepily from the bed. 

 

“Oh! I didn’t mean to wake you. I’m sorry,” she apologized.

 

“It’s fine,” Dorian yawned, “ I meant to be awake when you got in, anyway.” He slid from the bed and padded to the tub. He folded down next to it. She’d left the small door open and he had just enough space to fold his legs and lean back against the bathroom wall. “The oldest rider on record was 300.” 

 

Dyna hissed her agreement. 

 

“I could live that long? But what about everyone I know?” she asked. 

 

Dorian shrugged. “Most riders try not to get close to non riders for that very reason. They’ll die before we will. Luckily most of the people you like are riders.”

 

“You, Sera, Varric, and Cullen. That’s it,” Ursa argued. 

 

“And Josephine. Melly’s her dragon. She’s just too large to stay in the Keep. Josephine goes to visit her nightly. Sometimes she brings her work up to the mountain,” Dorian added. 

 

“That’s five people,” Ursa said.

 

“Do you even like more people than that?” Dorian asked jokingly. 

 

Ursa snorted. “What about Cassandra? Leliana?” 

 

Dorian shrugged and looked more serious. “They’ll age and die. No doubt at a ripe old age if we all make it through this. We’ll live on, remembering them for who they were when they were here with us. It’s all we can do.” 

 

Ursa sighed deeply. She couldn’t tackle all her world’s problems in one night, she decided. Sliding down into the tub, she peeked over at Dorian.

 

“Since you’re awake, could you wash my hair?” 

 

He nodded and slid to sit behind the tub. Ursa fell into a light sleep as he massaged her scalp. She stood when he pulled on her hands and followed him sleepily to the bed. She pulled on the clothes he handed her and groaned in appreciation when he slid into the bed beside her.

 

“Goodnight, bear,” he whispered into her wet hair.

 

She hummed a response and promptly fell asleep. 

 

____

 

“A wealthy rider by the name of Vivienne has asked for you to make an appearance at her ball. It’s to be a rather large affair, I’m afraid but I believe you need to make it there,” Josephine said, her tone regretful. 

 

Ursa groaned. “Can’t I send Dorian? That’s his thing, not mine.” 

 

“You can bring him. Cassandra has bowed out but Commander Cullen has grudgingly agreed to take her place for this particular event,” Josephine replied. 

 

“Why?” Ursa asked, her eyebrows furrowing. 

 

“Cassandra doesn’t really do fancy either,” Josephine replied.

 

“No,” Ursa said, shaking her head, “Why is Cullen taking her place?” 

 

Josephine shrugged. “He offered. And you do need an escort that the court knows. Considering Commander Cullen’s background, he’ll be known, if not welcomed.” 

 

“His background?” Ursa asked. 

 

“His past history as a Knight Commander to the Blood Brothers. He was known there as the lion. The name precedes him. As does yours. I’m not sure what she can offer, but she seems rather serious about it. The ball is in two weeks which gives me time to prepare you both,” Josephine said. She was already turning to her printouts of do’s and don’ts while Ursa tried to hide her surprise at Cullen’s history. She hadn’t known where he’d come from, only that he clearly lived up to his title of commander. When Josephine turned back to her, she smiled and listened politely as Josephine told her the do’s and don’t of city culture. 

 

____

 

TWO hours later Ursa tried to find Dorian. She was exhausted and needed to complain to someone who would understand. Sera would only mock her and it seemed even Cassandra believed the lessons would be necessary. Only Dorian would allow her to rant before setting her straight. She walked past the training ring and was surprised to find that Cullen wasn’t there. She’d meant to warn him of the lesson to come but he was nowhere to be seen. Shrugging, she headed to the library, Dyna on her heels. She smiled at the sight of Dorian, head cradled in his hand as he bowed over a book. She stepped forward only to pause when Cullen slid into the seat across from Dorian. She ducked behind a bookshelf, peeking around the edge to watch. Dyna huffed at her, chiding at sneaking around, but Ursa shushed her. Dorian had assumed that Cullen didn’t like him. They’d discussed it at length and she was curious what their interaction would yield. 

 

“Commander,” Dorian greeted without looking up. 

 

“Dorian,” Cullen replied. 

 

“Did you need something or were you just hiding from Josephine?” Dorian asked. 

 

“A little of both,” Cullen confessed. 

 

Dorian looked up. Cullen was still in his armor and he looked uncomfortable surrounded by books. Dorian placed a marker in his page and closed the book, looking expectantly at the Commander.  

 

“It’s about the Herald,” Cullen said nervously. 

 

“I assumed as much,” Dorian said in amusement. “But she really dislikes that name. Perhaps try calling her by her given name. That would be a good start.” 

 

Cullen rubbed the back of his neck and tried to look anywhere but at Dorian. “It’s unprofessional,” he muttered. 

 

“Dragon’s fiery balls, Rutherford. You’re going to be working beside her for at least a year. At least. Let’s not kid ourselves that this is going to be any shorter than that. If anything, we’ll be here longer. You’ll be side by side for much of that time, if the amount of skirmishes she’s breaking up now are any indication. If you can’t call her by her name you might have a problem,” Dorian said dryly. 

 

“I don’t know...nevermind,” Cullen sighed, starting to rise to his feet. Ursa took a small step forward, wishing he would stay so she could hear more of their conversation. It was Dorian who stopped him.

 

“Sit down, Commander. Call her whatever you like, just know you’re going to get a chilly reception if you keep calling her Herald,” Dorian snorted. 

 

Cullen sat and looked past Dorian’s shoulder. Ursa scrambled to hide in the shelves as Cullen looked past her hiding spot. 

 

“I worry for...the Inquisition. She has no training and yet she runs recklessly into danger. I’ve read Cassandra and Varric’s reports. She leaps off of cliffs to kill bears. She  _ runs  _ to the rifts despite having no true combat skills. Two hours training with me won’t suffice if she’s going to fly into every ounce of trouble like that. You’ve known her the longest of anyone. What can we do to to-” Cullen was cut off by Dorian’s laughter.

 

“You can’t stop her. If there’s one thing about your  _ Herald  _ that you should all learn, it’s that no one can stop her from doing something stupid. She let a dragonling hold onto her hand through a full hatch. She nearly lost the hand to damage. As it is, she can hardly feel anything with it. She wasn’t even sorry about it, just happy that the dragonling found their rider. And that’s not even close to the most stupid thing she’s ever done. She’s going to throw herself into danger because it’s the right thing to do. Even if she protests it, she wants to help people and you’ve all been telling her this will do that. I believe you’re right and so does she but you can’t have it both ways,” Dorian said.

 

Cullen shook his head. “I don’t want to stop her. I didn’t think I could. I want to know what I could do to help her when she does the things you or I think are stupid.” 

 

Dorian paused. He looked at Cullen thoughtfully. The Commander truly was a beautiful man. He was all coiled strength wrapped in a humiliated kindness that Dorian could tell the man didn’t see. He had a halo of curly blonde hair and soft but intelligent eyes that now were trained on Dorian. He could be exactly what Ursa needed, if neither of them messed it up with their own insecurities. 

 

“You could be good for her, Commander. My advice? Train her more. She is going to continue lunging into fights without a thought and the people around her are going to continue to protect her. Train her to be better and we’ll all worry less,” Dorian said. 

 

Cullen nodded thoughtfully. “I hope...I hope they allow you to accompany her more,” Cullen said. “I trust you to protect her when she’s too thick headed to think she needs it.”

 

Dorian studied the man in front of him. It really was too bad he was smitten with Ursa. He might actually be the perfect man. Shaking his head wistfully, Dorian said, “You’re definitely good for her. I hope so too. God knows she needs the help.” 

 

Cullen nodded and stood. This time Dorian let him, looking back down at his book. 

 

“Audri…” Cullen started, sounding embarrassed, “She’s very strong. A very beautiful creature.” 

 

Ursa studied the interaction, curious as Dorian looked up, his gaze serious. “She is. As is Anscomb.”

 

Cullen nodded curtly and turned on his heel to go. When he was gone, she approached Dorian.

 

“How much did you hear?” he asked when he heard her sit down. 

 

“All of it,” Ursa said, trying to sound sorry. Dorian looked up with a smirk.

 

“You don’t have to sound so abashed, even if you’re faking it. There was nothing in that conversation I wouldn’t have told you anyway. Besides, he had a point. You do rush into trouble with very little umph to back you up. I hope they do send me with you next time you go out on your woodland adventures. I’d feel better, that’s for sure,” he said.

 

“Are you saying you,” she gasped in fake shock, “Care for me, Dorian Pavus?!” 

 

He stood in a sweeping gesture, knocking his book from the table. She giggled as he crossed to her side of the table and yanked her into his arms. The few people in the library looked over curiously but Dorian merely pulled her into a tight embrace. “Care?” he asked theatrically, “Do I care for you? Why yes! I care like the sky cares for the stars!”

 

“Oh Dorian!” Ursa pretended to swoon. 

 

He swung her legs up, cradling her to his chest. She giggled and held on to his neck. He spun them around. “May I ravish you now?” he asked. Around them, people began to whisper. Ursa laughed harder.

 

“Do you even need to ask?” she purred, playing up her part for her audience. Dorian could always make her do the most ridiculous things. Things she’d never consider doing. Josephine would yell at her for the display later but Dorian was grinning down at her. She could never withstand his smiling face. 

 

He began to stride from the library, only dropping her to her feet when the doors had swung shut. He began to laugh as soon as they were out in the hall and she hugged him, feeling his laughter rumble in his chest. 

 

“We’re going to get in trouble for that,” Ursa said, her forehead pressed to his shoulder. 

 

“Let them talk. It’s not like it’s anything new. Besides, it was fun. And I already stay in your room. Rumors have started for less,” Dorian said. 

 

“True,” Ursa shrugged, stepping back. “Dyna?” 

 

The dragon slid around her feet. “ **That was entertaining, if not idiotic.”**

 

“What a spoil sport,” Dorian said. He hugged Ursa one more time before turning to go. He muttered to himself about Fade rifts as he went, making Ursa chuckle as she turned to go. Only to walk right into Leliana. 

 

“Oh!” she exclaimed. 

 

“Herald,” Leliana greeted. Ursa tried to hide her wince at the name. 

 

“Did you need something?” Ursa asked.

 

“From Dorian, yes. Josie tells me he’s accompanying you and Commander Cullen to the ball at Vivienne’s. I need to get him up to speed as well, though I fear he might know more than I. She is an elite rider and I confess that’s a circle I’ve never been fully privy to,” Leliana said, looking past Ursa to Dorian’s retreating form. 

 

“Then by all means, I won’t keep you,” Ursa said, stepping out of the way. Leliana nodded and hurried by, catching up to the dragon rider quickly. Ursa shook her head at their forms and walked away. 

 

____

 

“I am so not ready for this,” she said to the mirror. She was in Josephine’s room where the other woman was busy pulling gowns from a large wardrobe. Josephine had five wardrobes which seemed excessive but Ursa didn’t mention that. Dorian was sitting in a rocking chair flipping through tweets on his phone. He looked up sporadically and gave his opinion but it was Josephine who would make the final decision. 

 

“Red looks wonderful on you but so does black. Last season it was a faux pas to wear black to a ball but this year it’s all the rage. I saw we put you in both,” Josephine said, pushing a blush pink gown aside to find the one she was thinking of. “I bought this for me but then this happened and I had no place to wear it.”

 

“Josie if it’s yours…” Ursa trailed off as Josephine pulled a sleek black gown with red stones sewn into the neckline from the wardrobe. It was stunning and Ursa wondered how it would look on her own small frame. 

 

“It’s nothing,” Josephine dismissed. “I have too many to count. My own vanity might just be my downfall if I’m not careful.” 

 

“Oh now, don’t say that,” Dorian said, smirking over the top of his phone. 

 

Over the month they’d been at Haven, Dorian and Josephine had struck up an easy banter while Ursa had found Josephine to be a wonderful friend. She valued the woman’s opinion and smiled when the gown was handed to her. 

 

“Men have it so easy,” she said, twisting in the full length mirror to watch the stones catch the light.

 

“But we don’t get to look so pretty,” Dorian deadpanned. 

 

Ursa shot him a smirk. “I like this one,” she told Josephine.

 

“Good. I think you’ll be the talk of the ball,” Josephine beamed. 

 

Ursa looked down at her glowing hand. “I think I might’ve been before this but if this dress can take away from my hand or Dyna, I’m all for it.”

 

**“I’ll have you know I like being the center of attention,”** Dyna said lazily. She was lying over Audri’s back, her body a little bigger and slimmer than it had been when she’d first hatched. She blew little balls of green light from her mouth so they bounced off Audri’s head. Audri snorted.

 

**“All dragons do. We’re very vain creatures if you haven’t noticed,”** she added. 

 

“I just don’t want all eyes to be on me for you. No offense. I don’t even want everyone to look at me at all but I’m a little sick of them seeing me as some reborn god. I’m not Jesus. I’m just...me,” Ursa said. 

 

“And you’re beautiful,” Josephine said, “All eyes would be on you anyway. So let’s make sure it’s for the right reasons.” 

 

____

 

CASSANDRA pushed Cullen’s hands away from his tie for the third time. “Stop it. You’re messing it up.”

 

“Why do you think I don’t know how to tie a tie?” he asked irritably. 

 

“Because I’ve seen you try to tie one before. Don’t forget, I’ve known you longer than most,” she said, her gaze focused on the tie.

 

He sighed. “What is it?” 

 

“What’s what?” she asked.

 

“What is it that you aren’t saying? You’re not just abusing my only tie because I can’t tie it. So just say it,” he said.

 

Cassandra let out a deep breath. “You have to be careful. It’s one thing here. No one here will ridicule you for it but they might out there. Rumors like that can be dangerous, Cullen. I don’t want to see you get hurt.” 

 

Cullen caught Cassandra’s hands. She looked up at him. “What are you saying?” he asked.

 

Cassandra pulled her hands from his grasp. “We’ve all seen it. We all know. If this is what you want I’m happy for you. Heaven knows you deserve to be happy for once but she is only going to become more prominent and more powerful. If it gets out that she’s sleeping with her Commander, whether it’s true or not, it could harm both of your credibility. Just be careful tonight. The city riders...they notice things like that and it won’t take long for it to make it back to the Glory if they do.” 

 

“I don’t-” he started but she cut him off.

 

“Don’t. Lie to yourself if you want but I know it’s true. Just be careful tonight. That’s all I ask,” Cassandra pleaded. 

 

Cullen looked away. “She’s going to be escorted by Dorian, anyway.” 

 

“Cullen,” Cassandra said softly but firmly. He looked down at her again. “You know you don’t believe that.”

 

He turned to the mirror and smoothed down his suit jacket. He felt uncomfortable out of his armor and with his hair artfully styled. He told himself he was doing this to keep them safe. Because Cassandra refused to step foot in the city court again unless it was a matter of life and death. Because someone with military training needed to go just in case. He needed to believe that. Frowning, he turned away from the mirror.

 

“I’m not lying to myself. I’ll be careful, Cassandra,” he said curtly. 

 

Cassandra sighed and nodded. “Very well. Let’s go. They must be waiting by now.”   

 

____

 

THEY had only been waiting about 10 minutes when Cullen and Cassandra walked to the garage. They were taking their nicest car, a long, large vehicle able to carry three full size dragons and their riders as well as a driver. It was a sleek black car, modeled after the nicer cars non dragon riders used. Dorian, wearing a white suite with black shirt and a red tie, leaned against its door chatting to Audri while Ursa fussed with her dress.

 

“Stop playing with it,” Josephine said, pushing Ursa’s hands away from the smooth material. Ursa frowned.

 

“I don’t usually get dressed up. It feels weird,” Ursa said. 

 

“You did just spend a month in the mountains. Let this be a fun night,” Josephine said.

 

“I really don’t think any of this will be fun,” Ursa snorted. 

 

“You might want to rethink that,” Dorian said. He was looking past her so both Ursa and Josephine turned. Ursa swallowed hard at the sight of Cullen, hair slicked back and in a fitted, black suit. Cassandra was in her usual jeans and plain T-shirt, looking drab beside him. Ursa spared a tight smile for her before looking back at Cullen.

 

“You look-” they both started together. Their words stumbled from there, both trying to allow the other to speak.

 

“I look wonderful. We know. Let’s go,” Dorian said, giving them a reprieve that they gladly took. He winked at Josephine and Cassandra before following Audri into the car and closing the door. 

 

“I warned him to be careful of how he looks at her tonight. I should have warned her too,” Cassandra muttered to Josephine as the car started. 

 

“Let them have this one night,” Josephine said. 

 

“They can have every night after this but I fear that this night might cause them more problems. It will cause us more problems if they’re noticed,” Cassandra said tersely. 

 

“Anyone would notice. They’re the only ones who don’t,” Josephine said softly. 

 

Cassandra crossed her arms. “That’s what worries me,” she said. 

 

____

 

THE party was loud even from the outside. A valet had taken their keys and the three stood at the bottom of the front stairs, unable to move. Cullen replayed Cassandra’s words in his mind as he offered Ursa his arm. She took it and he tried not to stare. 

 

The dress she’d chosen was stunning. It hugged her figure and the black made her look slinky and mysterious. Josephine had piled her hair on top of her head in wavy tendrils with a small braid along the left side where she’d shaved it. She wore minimal makeup with vivid red lipstick  and a single line of rubies was draped around her neck. The scar on her face was blotted away so her skin looked smooth. He found he missed her freckles but pushed the thought away. The slit in the dress gave a tantalizing view of her thigh as she walked and her red bottomed shoes flashed with each step. She looked nervous.

 

Dorian took her other arm and met Cullen’s gaze over her head. “Dragons first,” he said gravely. 

 

**“Masks up,”** Anscomb said. 

 

Dyna shook her whole body, lifting her wings so their span would catch the light. Ursa rolled a red glove up her right hand but Cullen stopped her from putting on its twin. 

 

“No,” he said, “Let them see it. It’s possibly why we’re here.” 

 

“I don’t want that to be why,” she said sourly but tucked the second glove into her small bag. She hooked her arm back through both of the men’s and nodded. “Okay. Let’s go.” 

 

____

 

VIVIENNE was well known within the Glory. She was a liaison to the Glories of England and America but she was mostly known within the country for her lavish parties and powerful dragon, Aleda. Aleda was a larger sunburst dragon in a vivid orange with a nearly translucent stomach. When she breathed fire, watchers could see it build in her belly. It was a spectacular sight and one that Vivienne’s guests all clamored to see. But this party was different. Instead of watching Aleda they watched the door. The Herald of Andraste had RSVP’d and they were all waiting to see her. Her picture had popped up on many articles and her name was spoken with reverence around the country. Those in the city weren’t as kind but Vivienne’s interest had been peaked. She was curious to see how the Herald arrived and with who. 

The party had been going for about an hour when a waiter whispered in her ear. She graciously ducked from her guests to watch the entry of the Herald. 

 

She wasn’t disappointed. Ursa entered between two beautiful men. To her left was Commander Cullen Rutherford and his dragon Anscomb. Vivienne knew of him as many in the Glory did. The lion, they called him. He’d once been a powerful commander in the Blood Brother’s circle but had left after the order had suffered losses and a mad leader. It was in vulgar appreciation that the crowd watched him. 

 

To Ursa’s left was a dark haired man that none would know if it weren’t for research. Dorian Pavus of Tevinter. His father was an influential member in the Glory but his estrangement to his son had him enduring whispers behind his back. Dorian too was catching glances but it was the woman with the glowing green hand and the small green dragon that had the crowd whispering. She stood tall and proud but she wasn’t fooling Vivienne. She was uncomfortable with the attention. She was resolutely not looking directly at anyone and seemed to be hunting the crowd for her host. Vivienne stayed on the balcony, curious to see what would happen if she didn’t appear. It didn’t take long for a member of her party to approach them.

 

The man made grand gestures and spoke loudly against the Inquisition. He called the Herald and her band of followers heretics. The Commander tried to step in front of her but the Herald lifted her chin, no longer playing at being a leader. Vivienne watched her become one in a single move. It intrigued her, causing her to lean on the bannister to hear more clearly. 

 

“And what are you, sir? Other than a man in a mask,” she replied coolly. The room fell silent. 

 

“I am a prominent member of the Glory,” he blustered. 

 

The Herald laughed. “The Glory tried to strip me of my bond to Dyna. Forgive me if I have little time for prominent members.” 

 

Dyna wound around her feet and hissed at the man. He took a step back, his own dragon stepping in front of him. 

 

“It seems you have two right on your arm, Herald,” the woman to his left said snidely. The Herald’s right eyebrow lifted. She didn’t bother to look at the two men escorting her.

 

“Is that meant to insult me? Commander Rutherford and Mr. Pavus are dear to me and of great importance to the Inquisition. Anything else untoward is simply rumor,” she said, a smirk making her red lips look mischiveous. 

 

Vivienne had seen enough. She descended the stairs. 

 

“My dear Mr. Caspian, it seems you’ve been outplayed. Tell me, Herald, what shall I do with him? Aleda could roast him. You could take him with your own hand. I could banish him from my home. Which do you wish?” Vivienne asked.

 

Ursa looked the host over before looking at the masked man. She waved her ungloved hand. “He’s your guest. Do what you wish. If I executed everyone who disliked me or yelled at me there would be hardly anyone left in the world.” 

 

Vivienne was dark skinned and tall. She was voluptuous in her curves and dressed to show it. Her white gown had a plunging neckline and she wore white gold chains along her neck and connected to her many earrings. Lace gloves covered up to her elbows and her horned hat matched the delicate horns her dragon carried. She smiled at the Herald. 

 

“Come with me, my dear. We have much to discuss. Your escorts may enjoy the party without you for a bit,” Vivienne said. “Mr. Caspian will take a turn about the gardens, I believe.” 

 

Ursa looked back at Dorian and Cullen for a breath before following Vivienne up the stairs. They paused at a window overlooking the gardens. Utterly alone, Ursa felt her guard go up. Dyna slid beside her as Aleda took her place beside her partner. 

 

“Aleda, may I properly introduce you to the Herald of Andraste and her dragon, Dyna,” Vivienne said. 

 

Aleda bowed her head and Dyna followed suit. 

 

“ **You were born of my mother’s clan,”** Dyna said, “ **I’ve heard much about you. It’s a pleasure to meet such a powerful member of my family.”**

 

**“I should say the same,”** Aleda replied. 

 

“We all should. The first mixed breed dragon since before our time. You must feel very lucky to have been chosen,” Vivienne said. Ursa pursed her lips at the words. “Oh my dear, I’m not mocking you. I’ve read about you. You worked in the Keep. You saw many dragonlings born but none matched with you. It must have been a painful life. I can’t imagine the joy you must have felt upon this bonding.” 

 

“I had some...odd circumstances but yes. I wouldn’t give it up for the world,” Ursa replied. 

 

“That’s why I asked you here tonight. Though I must admit I was curious, I do believe I can help you. The Glory is falling into shambles. With the loss of the Seekers help and the Blood Brothers seeming to crumble from within I believe your side is the only one worth fighting on at this point. I’d like to offer my services in any way. Mine and Aleda’s,” Vivienne said. 

 

Ursa looked taken aback. She hadn’t known why she’d been invited. They’d discussed the options at length before she’d left but no one had been sure. This was the best possible outcome and it was one they hadn’t wanted to rely on. Vivienne held much power over the riders in the Glory as well as authority with those in other Glories. With her helping them not only would they have one of the most powerful dragons of the Glory, they’d have political power at their sides. 

 

“Why?” Ursa asked dumbly. 

 

Vivienne chuckled. It was the laugh of a diplomat and Ursa didn’t trust it. “Oh my dear, you know nothing of our politics, do you?” 

 

Ursa glowered. Vivienne waved her hand daintily. “We choose the side that will win. I believe in your cause but more importantly, I think you could win. You might be our only option to align the two sides. Besides, Fade magic is growing and the whispers say it’s not just the doing of feral clans but of a single dragon. If I can help the Inquisition fight and win this battle I would like to. Despite what you may think of me, I too want a better world.” 

 

Ursa looked out the window. There were couples circling the gardens slowly. She watched a man pull a woman into a dark corner. 

 

“Do you wish to go back to your old life?” Vivienne asked when Ursa didn’t respond. 

 

Ursa shook her head, watching the couple kiss passionately. 

 

“Do you wish to be a normal woman? One who could have a secret tryst in the dark of the gardens?” Vivienne pressed. 

 

Ursa looked back. “You may join us at Haven. We’ll be glad to have you. I’ll tell Ms. Montilyet to expect you.”

 

“Of course. Go enjoy the party my dear. The night is still young and your escorts must regret your absence,” Vivienne said, her smile coy and playful. Ursa nodded to her, the green in her hand flaring. She turned on her heel and made her way carefully down the stairs. 

 

Dorian and Cullen were standing together looking uncomfortable as men and women alike fawned over them. Ursa could read the malice in some of their voices  as she pushed through the crowd. She made sure to elbow them harder than the others. Audri greeted her with a growl and Anscomb bowed slightly. 

 

“Dorian, would you dance with me?” she asked, her frustration biting in her words. He gratefully took her arm. Cullen looked helplessly at them as they passed. “You’re next, Commander,” Ursa added at the sight. He slumped in relief then turned back to the woman pressing against his arm, trying to extract his arm from her grasp. 

 

“What happened?” Dorian asked as he took her waist and placed her hand on his shoulder. Ursa tried not to watch her feet as they moved. She’d never danced so formally before. The most she could claim was Keep parties where music was blasted from an Ipod and those in attendance left sweaty and usually glued to a partner they would regret in the morning. This was very far from that, pushing Ursa even farther out of her comfort zone. 

 

“She offered us her help,” Ursa replied, counting her steps under her breath. Dorian swung her around and pulled her taunt to him. 

 

“Isn’t that what we’d hoped for?” he asked quizzically. 

 

“Yes and I accepted but I’m not sure I trust her. I definitely don’t like her,” Ursa confessed. 

 

“You don’t have to like all of our allies. I don’t like Solas much but I stand him. You’re the head of a revolution. Sometimes you have to make decisions you don’t personally like but that are for the greater good,” Dorian said.

 

“Which is why I said yes,” Ursa grumbled. 

 

Dorian spun her outward and then gracefully back in. Her dress skated across the floor and there was a polite wave of applause. 

 

“She’ll be good for us. No doubt Josie will be beside herself,” he said. 

 

“She won’t enjoy the rumors. I lost my temper before. No doubt we’ll hear by tomorrow how I’m sleeping with both you and the Commander,” she scoffed. 

 

“Is that so terrible? You aren’t sleeping with either of us so what should it matter?” he asked. 

 

“Image matters. Or so Josie says. Even Cassandra’s given me a lecture. I’m not to look too ragged. I’m not to look too attached to the people I work with. I’m to remain impartial, at least in the public eye. Any type of true emotional connection could be exploited or used to make me seem less credible. I just...when did this become my life? It’s not like I had any romantic options before but at least then I could have pursued them without shame. Now I feel as if I have to hide everything. Even my affection for you,” Ursa said bitterly. 

 

“You don’t. Image might matter but seeming cold isn’t going to help you either. So maybe you don’t announce who you’re in a tryst with but you shouldn’t feel ashamed to care. Besides, it’s not like they can’t tell. We’re intimate with each other and anyone with a brain would notice. I’m sure Josie will understand. There are enough rumors in Haven alone. We can’t hide, so why bother?” Dorian pushed a loose hair behind Ursa’s pointed ear. The woman smiled at him and he nearly sagged in relief. She’d been radiating so much tension he thought she might snap. She wiggled her hips slightly in his hold so he tightened his hold on her. 

 

“You get to explain it to her,” Ursa warned. 

 

“I look forward to it,” Dorian replied. He dipped her so the crowd ooed and she smiled once more. 

 

Cullen watched them and tried not to feel envious. 

 

**_“She’ll be in your arms next,”_ ** Anscomb said. 

 

_ “It’s not...I don’t deserve it. Besides, look at them. Have two people ever looked so perfect together?”  _ Cullen replied. 

 

Anscomb looked at the two on the dance floor. He wished Cullen would see it the way he did. He’d always been the more reasonable one. The impartial outside view his bonded human needed. Cullen couldn’t see that the love between the two was platonic no matter how many times he was told. They might be in love with one another but not the way either of them truly wanted. Besides, Ursa looked at Cullen the way he looked back at her. Anscomb wished he could help Cullen see it. At first he hadn’t been sure. Ursa was beautiful but she could have been just another pretty woman who saw Cullen and swooned. Anscomb now knew that wasn’t the case. Ursa cared deeply and if Dyna was to be believed, she cared deeply for Cullen. 

 

Dyna was delightful and Anscomb would be lying to himself if he said he wasn’t interested in the dragonling. He hoped it would work out the way he wished. Dyna would be old enough to mate in a few months and if they played it right, Cullen and Ursa could be together as well. Most riders ended up with the human counterparts of their dragon’s mate. Mating for a dragon was intimate and it linked the minds of all involved. Anscomb had assumed it would never happen for him and for Cullen but he was considering now. He’d already shown his interest to the young dragon who had smirked at him, snorted, and replied with a cool, “ **_We’ll see.”_ ** There was a path forming in his mind. One he hadn’t seen before but he was excited to walk. 

 

**_“There is no such thing as perfection. I don’t see it as you do. But they’re coming back. We’ll have this fight, again, later,”_ ** Anscomb said, faking a yawn. 

 

Cullen glared at him, the sour look still on his face when Ursa stepped in front of him.

 

“If you don’t wish to dance, Commander, you could just say,” she said. The people around them tittered. 

 

“Oh no. I...this way,” Cullen stuttered. He offered her his arm and she took it with a graceful incline of her head. He looked at the gentle curve of her neck and inhaled the scent of her perfume. With her close to him, he could barely think. 

 

“You look like you’re enjoying this about as much as I am,” she said when they took their places. Her teasing voice pulled him from his own mind. He gave her a tight smile to which she shook her head. They waited for the song to begin, Cullen’s hands fluttering at her waist. 

She laughed and pulled his hand to her, settling it against the warm curve of her waist. “I won’t break, Commander.” 

 

“I didn’t…” he muttered, trailing off. He thought of what Cassandra had said. Could everyone see it? He hid it even from himself, how could it be so obvious? The song started and Ursa cleared her throat. He looked down in surprise.

 

“You need to lead,” she explained with a smirk, “I don’t know how to do this.” 

 

“Oh!” he lurched into the first steps, pulling her along with him and wincing when his toes hit hers. 

 

“Seems I’ve finally met someone as bad at this as I am,” she chuckled, looking down at their feet. “You lead, I’ll watch to make sure you don’t kick me.” 

 

He nearly sighed in relief. If he’d had to look into her face the whole time he might have lost his mind. As it was he studied the back of her neck as if it were an exquisite painting. The curling wisps of hair there looked soft and they were just a shade redder than the rest of her hair. Her skin was lighter there. Probably softer, though he found he didn’t mind her calloused hand in his own. 

 

“Dorian is a better partner no doubt,” he said when the quiet became unnerving. 

 

“Oh yes. He’s a wonderful dancer. His father made him learn. It was supposed to win him a wife,” Ursa said absently. 

 

“Did it?” Cullen asked a little too quietly. 

 

“I’m sorry?” she asked. 

 

“You two make a beautiful couple, will his father approve? I can’t imagine he wouldn’t,” Cullen babbled. 

 

Ursa looked up quickly. “Do you think…? You think I’m with Dorian?” 

 

“There were...people were saying...he announced it in the library,” Cullen mumbled. Under her gaze he felt more unsure. They were no longer dancing, simply swaying slightly. She stared at him, her mouth slightly opening. After a few excruciating seconds, she began to laugh. It was a full bellied sound and it caught the attention of some of the guests around them. 

 

“I’m not with Dorian,” she said, trying to keep her voice down but giggling so the words skipped. “He’s my best friend. Nothing more. I’ll let him tell you why but...I’m not.”

 

The music slowed to a stop and Cullen let go of her waist. She smiled up at him shyly. “I’m not with him, Cullen. I promise. Thank you for the dance.” 

 

He ducked his head to her, his mind racing as she walked away. Anscomb approached him, a light in his eyes. 

 

“ **_That went well,”_ ** he said. 

 

Cullen didn’t bother to respond. 

 

____

 

URSA fell asleep in the back seat on the drive home. She’d danced with many of the guests and by the time they’d left, she’d heard more than 10 proclamations of love. She’d waved them off with a laugh or a word of gratitude but had fallen into the car with a look of distaste on her face. 

 

“I never want to do another ball again,” she’d announced before dropping her head to Dorian’s shoulder. “Tell him why we aren’t together, Dorian. He thinks you’re my lover.” 

 

Her words had turned fuzzy and she’d closed her eyes right after, dozing off quickly. Cullen sat uncomfortably in the silence she left behind. Anscomb was speaking with Dyna and Audri was snoring, leaving Dorian and Cullen to speak. Dorian smiled sweetly at Ursa’s sleeping form. 

 

“I love her,” he said, pushing frizzy ends of her hair away from her nose. “But she’s not the right gender. I’m afraid I’m much more interested in your form than hers.” 

 

“Oh,” Cullen said dumbly. 

 

“It’s alright. It’s a common mistake. One we don’t usually dispel. It just makes things easier. She’s been there for the worst things in my life and I’ll be here for her. Any lover either of us has, has to understand that. But those rumors are just that. We might play it up, but none of it is true,” Dorian said. 

 

“You sleep in her room,” Cullen said.

 

“What do you think a gay rider goes through in the barracks?” Dorian asked, looking up. Cullen looked away from Dorian’s frank gaze. 

 

“Ah,” Cullen said in lieu of a true response. 

 

“If I could change who I am...well my father would be the first to congratulate me. But alas, even the threat of breaking my bond to Audri couldn’t change it. You don’t need to worry,” Dorian said, a twist to his lips that wasn’t quite a smile. 

 

“I wouldn’t...I didn’t mean…” Cullen tried to find the words, swearing under his breath. 

 

Dorian held up his hand. “I don’t need sympathy or an apology. Just when the time comes, take care of her. That’s it.” 

 

Cullen didn’t bother to ask what he meant. He didn’t try to protest. It seemed no matter how hard he tried to push it away, it came back. He looked out the window. Dorian didn’t speak again. The two men spent the ride in their own minds with the woman they cared for asleep between them. 


	5. 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The destruction of Haven occurs. Ursa is found in the snow. Skyhold is scouted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you must have noticed by now, I'm not following the exact story. To adapt the plot I needed to mess with it a bit. Do forgive me if I missed one of your favorite moments or cut scenes. I love them all, too, I just can't possibly write that much.
> 
> This story is now over 100 pages in a doc and nearly 50,000 words and I'm not even halfway through. Let's settle in for the long haul. 
> 
> Thanks for reading!

Chapter 5

 

“WHAT is it now?” Sera asked when she saw Ursa hurrying from the dining hall. There seemed to always be some kind of emergency Ursa needed to attend to. Sera’s friend had gone from the woman who protected the eggs to the head of a revolution during a war. It was an interesting transition that Sera enjoyed watching, even if it made her panic internally. 

 

“Why does it have to be something?” Ursa stopped to reply. Her left hand was glowing strongly and she’d pinned back her hair with a bobby pin where a rogue section kept trying to fall in her face. She looked busy but satisfied and not at all the nervous woman Sera remembered her being. There was a focused energy about her Sera had never seen in over 10 years of friendship. 

 

“Because it’s always something here. Plus you’ve got that...pinched off look. Like a crab. You have crab face,” Sera said. She sipped her tea, not being discrete with the flask she kept beside her. She’d come to Haven to help Ursa but also to escape a life she found boring and stale. Haven was definitely neither of those things. She’d helped to scout out new areas in the country. She’d fought humans and dragons more times than she’d like to count. She stole secrets when no one was looking and was applauded for it. She felt like there was an axe hanging over their heads. Ursa might be settled but the world was not and the “crab face” was indicative of that. 

 

“It’s nothing,” Ursa dismissed.

 

“Right, crab face,” Sera said with a salute. 

 

Ursa rolled her eyes and  continued down the rows of tables and benches, hurrying as discreetly as possible to the war room. 

 

Cullen and Cassandra were already there, their heads close together as they whispered fiercely. 

 

“Am I interrupting?” Ursa asked as she entered. They seemed to be about to kill each other. She didn’t want to be around if that fight ever truly happened. 

 

“No,” Cassandra said, “The Commander is just being a mule about something. As usual.” 

 

She glared at Cullen who glared back. “I still believe they’re our best option. I used to be a templar. I know what they’re capable of.”

 

“And I think they’re too unstable. I know the order too, remember,” Cassandra snapped back. 

 

“Templar?” Ursa asked. It was not a term she’d heard in her lessons. She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned into her hip, mindlessly flicking green light across the room from her palm. 

 

It had been nearly a month since Vivienne had joined their ranks and she’d fallen into an easy pattern. Lessons, scout the country and help people, deal with a big emergency of some sort, repeat. She’d taken on new agents, including a man who called himself Iron Bull and headed a mercenary group originally from Russia. He and his large dragon, a fighter class the size of an elephant, had come in handy in many combat situations. His group, the Chargers, were wonderful for gritty situations no one else wanted to touch plus Ursa found them to be good people, even if their morals were a bit skewed.

 

She’d grown used to being out in the woods for weeks on end and relished the comfort of clean clothes everyday she stayed in Haven. She’d even found her own level of comfort with her title. She was the figure of the inquisition, whether she wanted the name or not and she’d begun to truly sink into the job. She’d also fallen into a comfortable pattern with her council as well and she felt relaxed enough to stare Cullen down as he shifted his weight. 

 

“It’s what we called ourselves within the order of Blood Brothers. That name always felt dirty, as if we were doing something wrong. So we made our own. Those outside the order liked to mock us for it, so we kept it to ourselves. We drank the blood of dragons to help us hone in on them. We were tasked with watching those in the Glory who had chosen not to bond as well as keeping our eyes on the ferals. If need be we helped to break bonds and we served as guards to the Keeps. We were created to guard the powers of magic and the Fade from harming our world. You wouldn’t have seen us. The Dalish and Tevinter Keeps refused us. But the templars are powerful. Maybe even more so than the Unspoken. I don’t think we should disregard them. Not for the rift,” Cullen explained. 

 

There was more he wasn’t saying but it was clearly personal and Ursa didn’t want to push. She nodded thoughtfully. Josephine and Leliana joined them, closing the door behind them and filing to where the others stood over the table. There were small statues on the table marking important tasks they could not forget to finish. Leliana tapped between the two marking the Unspoken and the Blood Brothers. 

 

“It’s time to choose, Herald,” Leliana said. 

 

“Why is this my decision?” Ursa asked. She’d had lessons on the Unspoken. They seemed to be the popular choice among her council, Cullen’s opinion being the only one for the Blood Brothers. The Unspoken were a Keep of dragons who allowed in some humans but who still held the power of the Fade. She hadn’t learned much about the Blood Brothers. Templars, if she listened to what Cullen said. But Cullen’s face was fierce as he spoke of them. She shook her head.  She didn’t feel qualified to make the choice. She waved under all their gazes.

 

“You are the Herald. You’ll be the one to go and convince them. We need you to believe in whichever decision you make,” Josephine replied. 

 

“But I believe they could both help if they’d get over their prejudices,” Ursa said. 

 

“That won’t be possible. They’ve both announced no intention to work with one another. We’ve had contact with Fiona from the Unspoken and she’s welcomed you to their Keep to discuss this matter. The Brothers have also extended an invitation, though it was a bit more vague. If you wish to speak with them I encourage you to take the Commander with you as he knows the order,” Josephine said. 

 

“Can I think about it?” Ursa asked hesitantly. She’d become accustomed to making decisions on the spot. It seemed that everything needed to be done urgently but this matter she thought needed more consideration. 

 

“A day, that’s all I can give you,” Josephine said, sounding apologetic. Ursa nodded, biting her lip. She waved her hand, dismissing the table. She waited as they left, catching Cullen’s arm on his way out. 

 

“Can I talk to you?” she asked. He nodded. 

 

They exited Haven’s main gates and began to walk slowly around the perimeter. He waited for her to speak. She’d pulled on a soft windbreaker and she kicked the hard ground as she watched her feet. 

 

“Which should I pick?” she asked after a minute of silence. 

 

“You know my feelings,” Cullen said automatically. 

 

“I do. But why? You don’t usually fight so hard against the rest of us, so what makes this so special?” she asked. 

 

“The order has faced some hard times. I want to believe in second chances and I know they can do this. They deserve redemption in the eyes of the people,” he replied. 

 

“What happened? No one taught me much about them. It’s like no one wants to say anything about it,” Ursa said, frustrated with the lack of knowledge. 

 

“They were probably waiting for me to tell you. My commander, my boss as you might call it...she went mad. I thought...I trusted her. Many did. But she had us hunting the innocent. She was so convinced she was right that it nearly destroyed us. That’s when I walked away. The order has fallen to hard times but they’re strong. We all pledged ourselves to a life. I want them to have a chance to live that life as I do here, even if it’s not with the order itself.” Cullen ran his gloved fingers through his hair, quietly checking the watchtower stations as they passed them. 

 

Ursa peeked up at him. “Do you take vows? Like, I promise to watch all the sneaky dragons?” 

 

She was rewarded with a small chuckle. “Yes, but not like that. It’s an oath to Andraste and whatever god you believe in. I’ve watched men walk with their god into battle but call to Andraste when it matters. It’s an oath to protect.” 

 

“Is there...a purity vow?” Ursa asked. She could feel Dyna in her mind egging her on and she shushed her partner. Cullen blushed.

 

“Dragon’s talons...no. We aren’t made to...templars can date, marry, sleep with whoever they please. The order still has to accept a marriage and there are proper steps but there is no rule against it. Some might wish to pledge more but it isn’t required. I’ve known many of my friends to have girlfriends. Some even had wives.” 

 

“Did you take a vow?” Ursa asked. She told herself Dorian would ask. Dorian would encourage her just as Dyna was to push herself out of where she felt safe. She’d been dancing around this attraction for what felt like months.  She was frustrated with watching him from across the room. Every lesson he taught she watched his arms, his legs, even his hair as he wiped it from his face. She would watch him drink water and swoon. It had become a normal part of her day, to miss Cullen if he wasn’t around. To seek him out simply to say hello. It was time to do something about it as she was beginning to suspect he never would. 

 

Cullen choked. “What? No...I...dragon’s talons can we talk about something,  _ anything  _ else?” 

 

Ursa rolled her eyes, hiding her smirk. “Alright. I’ll talk to them. If you’ll go with me.” 

 

“Wait...you’ll speak with the order?” Cullen stopped walking so abruptly  Ursa was forced to turn on her heel to face him. 

 

“Yes. You convinced me. Congratulations. When can you leave?” she said.

 

“I? I convinced you?” he sounded dumbstruck. She shook her head and smiled wistfully up at him. She wished he saw himself the way others did. He was always surprised when his opinion was valued. 

 

“I trust you, Cullen. I just needed to know why you were so adamant. You have a good reason. I know you’re strong so it stands to reason the people you came from are too. I know Anscomb is powerful and I know your values which you say come from the order. Yes, you convinced me. I’ll speak with them. Now, when can you leave?” she asked again. The cold was creeping into her arms and she longed for the warmth of her small but cozy hut. 

 

“Three days,” Cullen said, still sounding stunned. 

 

“Okay. Tell Josie and I’ll be ready. I have to go tell Dorian and then I have a lesson with Solas. Thanks for speaking with me. I know you’re busy,” she said, hurrying away. She left Cullen to gape after her. 

 

____

 

“YOU asked him  _ what?”  _ Dorian asked with glee. He leaned forward on her bed, Sera’s feet in his lap. 

 

“If he took a vow of celibacy. I mean I didn’t say celibacy but it would’ve been hard to miss the inference. Fucking christ, what came over me?” Ursa moaned. 

 

“Probably your sexual frustration,” Sera said. She had a blue lollipop in her mouth that had dyed her tongue nearly purple. She stuck it out at Ursa who flicked up her middle finger. 

 

“I don’t even know if he’s actually interested. He looked horrified,” Ursa groaned. 

 

“ **He likes you,”** Dyna said.

 

**“It’s true,”** Audri said, “ **Anscomb thinks it’s cute.”**

 

**“Everyone knows it. I’m pretty sure they’re just going to lock you two in a room together soon if you don’t do something about it. It’s making everyone else squirm,”** Red Jenny added. The small dragon was the size of a hamster and she spat little, red, poison, darts across Ursa’s desk as she listened to the conversation. Red Jenny delighted in secrets as most poison red’s did. 

 

“I’ve thought about that but you’re both too damn polite to do anything even then,” Dorian said. 

 

“We’re in the middle of a war. I’m hardly here for more than a week at a time. It’s stupid to even think of it,” Ursa said, shaking her head. 

 

“It’s stupid not to. Every day this shit gets worse. If you can’t have some fun now, you might never get to again,” Dorian said. 

 

“I’m with him,” Sera said, nudging Dorian’s stomach with her toe. “Get laid. Seduce the Commander. You two are going to the Blood Brothers alone, aren’t you? Do it then.” 

 

Ursa made a face. “That would be in bad taste. He hasn’t had the best time with them.”

 

“Fine then. After. When you’re back,” Sera shrugged. 

 

Ursa looked thoughtful. She pushed her hair off her neck and hummed. “Maybe.”

 

Dorian let out a woop. Sera handed Ursa her flask and watched the Herald take a shot. “I’ll need more of this, but just maybe.” 

 

____

 

THE time never came. First the fight for the order distracted both Ursa and Cullen. When they marched home bloodied but victorious they didn’t see each other for days. Cullen was busy with his own duties while Ursa healed a broken leg and met with what was left of the templar order. They had lit up when she’d used the name and she’d never reverted back. Cullen had been right. They were powerful. A Fade force had taken many of them, the blood they’d been drinking tainted with Fade magic that caused them to lose who they were. Those left were happy to pledge themselves to the Inquisition. They were grateful to have been saved and even Dyna, who disliked the policing of dragons and subsequent killing of those who were deemed dangerous, agreed that their power would be enough. 

 

Finally, the time came to try and close the rift. It had hung over their heads long enough. It had been months since Ursa had first been found in the shattered Conclave. She’d learned about her connected abilities with Dyna. She’d gotten approval from the people around their rural land. She’d fought with the Glory about her placement in the world. She’d saved people. She’d killed others. It was time to put a stopper in the thing that had caused all of it. 

 

Ursa drew on her armor and tested her weight on her newly healed leg. A tainted templar had hit her with a rock, fracturing her ankle. Haven’s doctor had been surprised it hadn’t been worse. 

 

“If you don’t do anything stupid it should be fine,” Dorian said, repeating what the doctor had told her. 

 

“Do I ever do anything the safe way?” she asked. Dyna, now the size of a large dog, snorted. Her wings fluttered behind her in her laughter. 

 

“ **Not remotely.”**

 

“Try this time. I don’t want to lose you,” Dorian said. Ursa pressed her lips together and nodded. This was the big one. No one knew what would happen when they closed it. It could be nothing or it could try to destroy them. They were ready for the worst. 

 

“I’ll be there for as long as they’ll let me,” Dorian promised. 

 

“I know. I’ll try to be safe. Come on. We have a rift to close.” 

 

The magics had been explained to her many times but all she knew was that somehow, her glowing hand, Dyna’s tie to the Fade, and the blood of the dragons coursing in the templar’s veins would all work together to shut the large hole in the sky. She gulped as they neared it. Cassandra stood beside her. 

 

“We’ll protect you should anything go wrong,” she promised. 

 

“I know. This has been...well it’s been an honor. If this doesn’t go right,” Ursa said. 

 

Cassandra clasped her shoulder for a brief moment before turning back to their task. “We will finish this,” she said to herself. Ursa decided to believe her. 

 

Ursa felt the magic pull from her but it was over in a moment. The rift glared a bright green before shooting across the sky and dissipating as all the smaller rifts had. The templars stumbled but all were well. No one was hurt and a cry of joy went out across the units who had been waiting for a fight. It was over in minutes, the world quiet around them. 

 

Her hand still glowed even through the glove she wore. She touched the light with stiff fingers. Her right hand was her damaged one. In the dead of winter she had a harder time moving it but she needed to feel her fingers. To see the light that still resided in her palm. She pulled her glove off with her teeth and gently touched where the eggshell sat, a green slash in her skin, across her hand. She barely remembered the procession back to Haven. She was too stunned. In the cold night air the people danced. They sang and laughed. Ursa watched from the Keep steps, Cullen stepping up beside her. 

 

“You did it, Herald,” he said warmly.

 

“We did. I couldn’t possibly have done this without all of your help. All of you. What comes next?” she asked. 

 

“We put things together again. There are still more rifts. Still more people to help. It isn’t quite over,” he said. 

 

She looked up at him. There had never been a more perfect time. She’d done what needed to be done. There would be a break now. She could ask for something selfish before they began round two. She took a deep breath. 

 

“Cullen-” 

 

The alarm began to ring. All around the Keep there was the shrill announcement of danger. For a moment there was stunned stillness, then everyone began to run. Fire began to shoot from the sky as waves of feral dragons flew overhead. Ursa looked out over the Keep walls and felt staggered. A wall of dragons were coming at them. Around her, the world began to burn. 

 

“Get everyone inside! Now!” Cullen yelled, bursting into action at the sound. “Get the men on defense!” 

 

There were shots being fired. People fell in front of her and as she watched, a wave of fire rained from the sky. A dragon the size of the rift was flying there, it’s face a ragged mess that screamed with rage. It seemed to be looking for something in particular and she shivered when its eyes found her. Suddenly all the reports made sense. A single dragon drawing out rift energy. A single dragon who had vowed to destroy the Conclave in light of a better future for all dragonkind. A dragon who would no doubt kill them all if they didn’t get out. 

 

Ursa sprang to help, herding people inside as quickly as she could. She took many trips back, hoping to help as many people as she could. Her hair singed as she walked through fire to pull people out. She tried to block out the screams and held her breath to the smell of burning flesh. When Cullen finally ushered the last group in and shut the door it seemed eerie in the sudden quiet.  She found her council in the corner of the large foyer speaking quickly with wide eyes.

 

“They’re marching with no banner? This isn’t a keep?” Josephine asked in confusion. 

 

“It has to be someone,” Cassandra snapped. 

 

“It is,” a soft voice said from above them. They all looked up to the rafters. A pale white dragon sat there, his form flickering. “It’s a someone. A Fade who wishes to be more. A demon.”

 

“Who are you?” Ursa asked. She’d never seen the creature before and had missed its entry through the doors. 

 

**“He isn’t speaking dragon tongue,”** Dyna trembled. The dragon’s energy was off. Human but also Fade, it made her shiver. She didn’t trust it. Something had changed the dragon above her. He wasn’t a dragon at all. Not anymore. 

 

“I’m Cole. I saw him in the Fade. He’s come to kill you. He’ll kill you all. You’ve taken his prize and he wants it back. I don’t like him,” the dragon said. 

 

“You’re...what are you?” Ursa asked. 

 

**“He’s not like us. He’s been in the Fade for a long time,”** Dyna said, fear edging into her voice. 

 

“You must run. He will kill you,” Cole repeated. White smoke curled from his nostrils. He flickered out of sight for a moment before appearing on the ground in front of them. They all jumped back in surprise but Cole seemed unaffected by the response. 

 

“We can’t. We’ve turned the range guns on them but there’s no way out of here. We’ve trapped ourselves. The guns may buy us some time but…” Cullen’s eyes went blank as he spoke. They would die in Haven’s Keep. The dragon screaming in the sky had made sure of that. 

 

“What about the old defenses?” Ursa asked. She’d seen them when she’d walked around the Keep in her first days there. Old catapults with large stones waiting to be loaded. She’d found it odd then that they were still there. Now she wondered if they could help. 

 

“They would bury Haven,” Josephine said in horror. “There’s too much snow in the mountains. It would cause an avalanche.” 

 

“There’s a path,” a man wheezed from behind them. It was Roderick of the Glory. He’d been in and out of Haven with bitter words for them and reports for the Glory of their activity. Mostly they ignored him when he was there. Justice had mentioned him months before when they’d visited the Glory, afterwards he’d stayed in the Keep more often, always with a look of distaste on his face. Ursa hated him. Now he looked small. He was curled over a wound in his stomach and his face was white as he spoke. Blood pooled in his hands where he pressed on the bullet hole. 

 

“Yes,” Cole breathed. “He knows a path. He wants to share it before he dies.” 

 

“The summer path. It’s only used for the largest of dragons. I took it...on a whim...in my youth. It’s out the back. If you get the people out, someone should be able to fire into the mountain. Bring down the snow. Bury Haven and that army with it,” Roderick struggled to say. 

 

“Someone being me,” Ursa said resolutely. They all began to argue but she held up her glowing hand. “He wants me. He’ll get me. You get everyone out.”

 

“I’m not leaving you,” Dorian said from behind her. 

 

“Me either,” Cassandra said firmly. 

 

Ursa looked at the ceiling. It was only a matter of time before they’d come for the Keep. Before the guns stopped being helpful or ran out of ammunition. There was no time to argue. 

 

“Fine. The rest of you, get out. Get everyone out and get safe,” she said. 

 

Josephine nodded, tears in her eyes. She lunged forward and hugged Ursa tightly before hurrying away. Leliana paused, placing her hand on Ursa’s shoulder. It was the first time Leliana had touched her. 

 

“It’s been an honor, Herald,” she said. Ursa nodded, unable to speak. 

 

“I’ll get Audri,” Dorian said, looking between Cullen and Ursa. Cassandra nodded, following him. 

 

Cole, the whisper of a dragon, helped Roderick stand and stumble to show the people the way out. He faded in and out of sight as they watched him go. Ursa bit her lip as she looked up at Cullen.

 

“Cullen-” her voice broke. She cleared her throat. 

 

“If this is it...make that thing hear you,” he said. “Do not go quietly. Make it  _ hear  _ you.”

 

His eyes were alive, fiery. She longed to pull him to her but knew she’d missed her chance. Instead, she touched his cheek. He startled at the touch but then leaned in, his eyes locked on hers. 

 

“The world will shake,” she whispered. He nodded, pressing his lips gently to her palm before stepping back. The touch was fleeting and Ursa wondered if she’d imagined it as he melted back into the crowd. He had a responsibility and he would not waver. She wouldn’t either. She turned, looking down at Dyna. 

 

“ _ Let’s prove our worth.”  _

 

**_“Yes. It’s time.”_ **

 

____

 

HAVEN had fallen. They marched tirelessly through the snow until they could no longer see the puffs of white in the sky or hear the rumble of the world falling apart. It was dark and cold and the people were scared. Josephine helped the refugees make fires while Leliana tried to help those who needed medical attention. Solas made the rounds, his natural remedies coming in handy when they ran out of bandages. Cullen watched the drifts of snow from where Haven had once stood. 

 

“ _ She can’t be gone. She can’t. She’ll cross that ridge. She’ll come back.”  _ he repeated the words over and over in his head. Anscomb wished, for the first time in his life, that he couldn’t hear his partner’s thoughts. He crossed to where the other dragons were and huddled in their heat. Cullen would take no comfort from him tonight and he couldn’t watch such misery. 

 

When Cassandra and Dorian stumbled over the hill, Cullen called for help. Audri was dazed and too cold to do anything but shiver. Dorian had tears frozen to his cheeks and Cassandra only shook her head. 

 

“She pushed us away,” Dorian said softly when asked where Ursa was. Cullen left the man to his grief. He couldn’t comfort anyone.  He couldn’t even find his own grief. His mind was numb. 

 

They sat there for hours. No one seemed to have a plan. Through it all, Cullen watched the snow. 

 

____

 

HER leg was broken. Probably worse than before. She tried not to think about how much it hurt as she limped through the snow. She’d fallen into a tunnel. It had probably saved her and Dyna’s lives but the cold might have been the one with the last laugh.

 

“I...used to love...winter,” Ursa said, her teeth chattering. “It felt like...a clean...slate.” 

 

“ **_Keep your strength. Don’t speak,”_ ** Dyna pleaded. There was no power in her. She was tired. Drained. The dragon had been taunting and large. It had toyed with them as it spoke. Told them of the Fade and what the power Dyna had could truly mean if harnessed. It was only luck that had allowed them to get away. 

 

“I’m going to...die...I want to...have...words,” Ursa said. She limped more but she could no longer feel her leg. It worried her more to have no pain. She didn’t bother checking the appendage. If it was numb it was only a matter of time before she lost it. She kept limping.

 

“ **_We could make it,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

“You will. You’re...strong. I’m...just...me. Not enough...fat,” Ursa said, wheezing on a laugh. There was blood in her mouth and ice in her hair. She could feel her body slowing. 

 

**_“You’ll make it,”_ ** Dyna said, trying to heft Ursa onto her back and failing. 

 

“No. It’s...alright. I did...what I needed...to do. I just...didn’t tell...him. I wish...I had…” Ursa mumbled. Her words were slowing, her body going warm. She hummed at the sensation. Dyna looked about wildly. She couldn’t sense anything anymore. She didn’t know how far they had gone or if it would do anything but in a desperate panic she took a deep breath and screamed. 

 

____

 

CASSANDRA found Cullen by the edge of the camp. He must have been cold but he didn’t show it, watching the snow with blank eyes. Anscomb was in the camp, curled with Audri in quiet anguish, leaving his human counterpart to mourn. No one knew what to say.

 

“I’m sorry,” Cassandra said, misery in her voice.

 

“Why did you leave her?” he asked without turning. 

 

“We didn’t. She told us to run. She was right behind us. And then she wasn’t. She sacrificed herself. There was no time,” Cassandra said, sitting beside him. 

 

“I would’ve followed her,” he said numbly. 

 

“I know,” she said, leaning into his shoulder, “I know.” 

 

____

 

DORIAN took the tea with shaking hands. Josephine didn’t speak as she knelt beside him. She stroked Audri’s head and watched the man’s face. 

 

“When my father threatened to take Audri from me I called Ursa. She told me she would run with me. Far from here. To another country, another Keep. She promised she’d be with me forever. I laughed at the suggestion. Told her we could elope later. All she wanted, she said, was for me to promise her our whole lives. We were supposed to watch each other. To keep each other safe. But when she told me to run, I did,” he said. He wanted to pour the tea out. He wanted to walk into the snow until he too could feel nothing anymore. Without her, he was alone. 

 

“She wanted to protect you,” Josephine said softly. 

 

“I came here to protect her. She’d done too much already. I can’t take...how can I ever live up to this?” he asked, looking over at Josephine in anguish. 

 

“You live,” Josephine said simply. “That’s all you do. You live.” 

 

____

 

DYNA was dragging Ursa. Desperate tugs on the woman’s coat kept them moving but it was slow and Ursa’s breathing was becoming shallow. 

 

“ **_Come on,”_ ** Dyna pleaded in her mind, “ **_I refuse to watch you die. Not after this. There’s more life for us to live. Cullen. Think of Cullen. Please, Ursa. Please.”_ **

 

Only a flicker of dim recognition sounded in the woman’s mind. Dyna let go of the coat and shook her head. Taking another deep breath, she screamed once more. 

 

____

 

CULLEN’S head shot up. “Did you?” 

 

Cassandra looked up too. “Yes, I heard it. Someone’s out there.” 

 

They scrambled to their feet, Cullen lunging into the snow without a second thought. 

 

“Cullen! Wait!” Cassandra cried after him. “Someone bring me a light!” 

 

A flashlight was pushed into her hand and she ran after Cullen into the deep drifts, hoping they could find their way back.

 

____

 

DYNA had collapsed. She had no more strength and she would not go on without Ursa. 

 

“ **_I won’t do this without you. A human without a dragon can go mad but a dragon without their human is nothing. You are my soul bound and if we die here, we do it together. I love you. Cullen loved you too. I wish we could have seen the day for that. I would’ve taken Anscomb as my mate. I was playing hard to get. I wish I hadn’t now. Isn’t hindsight funny like that? We’ll be okay. Andraste will take care of us. She always has,”_ ** she said sleepily. 

 

Her eyes were falling shut when she saw the flicker. Pulling her head up took real effort but she did it. There was a light running towards them. She tried to yell but all that came out was a croak. It was enough. 

 

“She’s here!” Cullen’s voice reached them. Dyna smiled, letting her head fall to the snow. They were safe now. With that thought, she allowed the darkness to take her. 

 

____

 

“DON’T leave me. You can’t leave me. Wake up. Just wake up,” a male voice was murmuring in her ear. Something warm was thrown over her and she grasped pathetically at it with her stiff right hand. Whoever was holding her lifted it to her chin. She sighed in relief. Her leg had begun to ache once more. A steady pulsing of icy shocks caused her hip to twitch. 

 

“She’s cold, Commander,” a voice warned. “You need to put her down.” 

 

“No,” the male voice said. It shook and Ursa wished to soothe it. She couldn’t move her arms though and sleep seemed blissful compared to the world around her. 

 

“Your armor…” the voice trailed off. Ursa felt herself be laid down. She cried out pitifully at the loss of the body against her. She didn’t care that it's hard plains were chilled. 

 

“Her dragon. Get her dragon, she wants the body beside her,” the voice said again. Ursa wished she could shake her head. She could feel Dyna. She was only sleeping. She wanted the body back. The solid warmth of before. She reached out with her left hand, grasping whoever was beside her. 

 

“She wants the Commander,” Cassandra’s voice registered in Ursa’s blurry mind. “Cullen.” 

 

Ursa nearly purred when the warmth was pressed against her once more. It was lying against her side, an arm gently slid under her head and another across her ribs. She hissed when the pressure hit something painful and the arm quickly moved but the body didn’t go away. It was warm. Softer than before. But it still smelled of burned sky and cold air and something spicy she knew but couldn’t recall. Ursa waited, her eyes unable to open, wanting to be sure the body wouldn’t leave her in the night. She’d been so alone in the dark. She’d regretted so much. 

 

“I wanted to tell him…” she murmured before sleep overtook her and dreams of fields on fire burned in her mind. 

 

____

 

CULLEN’S fear had not subsided. She was alive but injured. Nearly on the verge of death when he picked her up. She was so light in his arms and he’d pulled off his cape without a thought. The fur was tucked under her chin when she’d clumsily reached for it. She looked so small. He’d wondered before what she’d look like when he held her but he’d never wanted it to be like this. Her leg was broken again, her toes blue when they removed her shoes. There was ice in her hair and on her eyelashes while an inspection of her mouth showed shattered teeth and bleeding gums. Her right hand, the one with the scar, was clumsy and stiff and her whole body too cold. She’d broken at least one rib as well. Dyna was worse for wear too. Cassandra had half dragged the dragon to the camp and laid her in the fire with the help of Iron Bull. Dyna barely woke but hummed at the heat, dried and frozen blood dripping into the flames.

 

“It means Ursa will live,” Cassandra said gently to Cullen who had yet to release the Herald from his arms. “She isn’t fighting to be closer to Ursa. She knows we’re safe now.” 

 

The doctors and nurses had tried to remove her from Cullen but he’d fought. He knew it was irrational but he couldn’t let her go. He’d told her as much as he carried her back. Whispered the things he hadn’t said before into her ice cold ear. Anscomb hissed at the doctor when she tried to push Cullen away. Finally, he’d relented. He’d laid her down and went to step away. Ursa’s small hand had shot out and found him when he’d released her and it was that, that sealed his fate. Cassandra had helped him remove his armor. He’d slid onto the small cot made of coats and towels. Ursa had sighed when he touched her. She winced when he touched her ribs and the doctor had shoved his hand away but she didn’t make him leave. She worked around him, her patient now calm enough to allow the pokes and prods needed to figure out what was wrong. 

 

He watched her through the night.  With each  healing step he prayed that Ursa would wake. Even if she pushed him away, she’d be alive and he would be grateful for it. Dorian came and sat with him hours into his vigil, his dark eyes large as he drank in his best friend’s shrunken form. He didn’t look at Cullen when he knelt beside her. Light was beginning to show in the treeline. They’d made it through the night. 

 

Cullen had to rise. He had work to do. With difficulty, he slid from his spot. She protested softly and he gestured to Dorian. 

 

“Take my place,” he said, “I have to attend to my duties. I’ve ignored them enough this evening.” 

 

“I’ll tell her it was you,” Dorian promised as he slipped down beside her. “It was you who found her. You who held her through the night.” 

 

“Don’t,” Cullen said, shaking his head. He pulled his armor back in. the plates of dragon resistant metal feeling heavier than ever before. 

 

“Don’t let her see that you feel for her as she feels for you?” Dorian asked softly. 

 

Cullen’s face twisted in a bitter smile. “I don’t deserve what she might give me. She doesn’t know me. Not enough. Don’t tell her. Let her think it was you. It should be, anyways. You’ve loved her for longer. It would be you at her side in the end.” 

 

He turned to go, hearing the other man whisper, “But it wasn’t.” 

 

He didn’t stay for the rest of Dorian’s spilled apology. He didn’t listen for the tears or hiccups of relief. He walked away, resolute in his decision, feeling only a twinge when Dorian’s cry of joy was heard behind him. 

 

____

 

URSA woke to a pounding head, aching chest, and burning leg. “Mother fucker,” she groaned, feeling the jagged edges of broken teeth with her tongue.

 

“Ursa!” Dorian cried joyfully. She winced and he apologized more softly, his hands running over her skin gently. 

 

“I thought I was dead,” she said. “Were you the one who carried me back? I thought it was...nevermind. I was delirious. Of course you came and found me. I went through all that trouble to keep you safe and you still waded into the snow for me. You idiot.” 

 

Dorian nodded, looking drawn out and tired. He didn’t reply to her gentle teasing. She touched his face. “Did you not sleep? I’m sorry I worried you.” 

 

“I’m sorry I left you there,” Dorian said, anguished. “I should have turned back, even if it killed me.”

 

“I chose it. Don’t go feeling bad for something I wanted,” Ursa denied. She smiled as she felt Dyna wake. “We’re both alive. We got out. A little worse for wear, but we’re alive. It’s alright. Where’s everyone else? Are they okay? Cassandra? Audri?” 

 

“Everyone’s fine thanks to you. That avalanche saved us. You saved us,” Dorian said. Ursa pressed her forehead to his. His voice was wobbly. Not the voice she’d come to expect from her friend. She felt his tears hit her cheeks. 

 

“I’m alright,” she soothed. She said it over and over until Dorian stopped trembling. She said it until  Solas’ head popped into the tent. 

 

“I hate to interrupt but I must speak with you, Herald. It’s about our current predicament.” 

 

____

 

URSA couldn’t walk so Solas explained. Skyhold was ahead of them. An old, abandoned castle that had been forgotten over time. It used to house the head of a dragon empire but as times had changed, so had the castle. If they kept moving forward they would see it. It would be big enough for all of them. It would be big enough for even more refugees. It could even become a better home than Haven, if they wished it to be.  If she allowed it, he would scout forward and prepare the castle with a few others. There were many able bodied men itching to move and they’d already offered their help. Ursa agreed, grateful for any suggestion other than the wintery hills. They had lost Haven, but another home called her name. When Solas left, she looked out over the camp and felt something new bloom in her chest. Hope. Hope for the people she stood with and hope for a future she’d thought they’d lost. Tremulously, she smiled.


	6. 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa heals in Skyhold. There's a chess game. Dorian has a crush. Awkwardness between Ursa and Cullen comes to a head.

Chapter 6

 

“HERALD!” the nurse cried desperately as Ursa slid down the bannister. 

 

“Your leg is broken, your rib is healing, you’ve  _ just  _ had all your teeth capped and still you insist on doing stupid things like this,” Dorian chided from the bottom of the stairs. Ursa landed easily on her left leg, balancing perfectly. 

 

She groaned. They’d made it to Skyhold fairly easily. She’d limped or been carried most of the way and once inside the doctors wasted no time in fixing her. Josephine had called in medical supplies. Melly had flown most of them in herself. Ursa had gone through three procedures to fix what had been broken and she was bored. 

 

She’d grown used to constantly moving. She’d actually liked not being in one place for too long. Her cast had been set and she wanted to walk on her own. They handed her crutches which she’d used until she’d reached the stairs. Sliding down them just seemed more fun. 

 

“What do you think the meeting is about?” she asked, ignoring Dorian’s warning. He’d become more protective since the disaster at Haven. While everyone else had gone into overdrive to fix up the castle, he’d stayed by her side.Every day more supplies were flown in. A whole new wardrobe for Ursa, more books for Dorian. Josephine spared no expense for those that had stayed with the Inquisition and would listen with a polite smile to all complaints, adding new objects to buy to her list quietly. 

 

Dyna had healed quickly and was practicing flying with Audri, leaving Dorian to make sure Ursa didn’t do anything stupid. She hated being told not to do anything stupid. It made her want to do those things even more. 

 

“Probably about the mess we have to keep cleaning. This place will never be fixed,” Dorian said, looking at the ruined ceiling.

 

Ursa looked down at her phone. Josephine had told her 10:30. It was 10:20. “I guess we’re about to find out.”

 

The meeting had been planned for outside on the steps to the castle door. Josephine claimed the war room wasn’t ready to fit both people and dragons inside and Dorian too had been invited. They walked to the main foyer, surprised to find it empty. 

 

“Where is everyone?” Ursa asked. Dorian shrugged.

 

“Don’t know but we might want to get out there. I know how you feel about being late,” he said. 

 

They pushed open the large door and were greeted with a roar of cheers and clapping. Ursa stumbled, gobsmacked. Dyna was waiting for her beside Cassandra and Dorian smiled as he led her to where the seeker was standing. The people were below in the courtyard. The soldiers mixed with refugees and those who had come to help rebuild. Josephine stepped up to Ursa. 

 

“I knew you wouldn’t come if I told you about it beforehand,” she whispered.

 

“I’m going to kill you,” Ursa hissed. Josephine smiled charmingly as she stepped back. 

 

Cassandra held up her hand and the crowd fell silent. Ursa shifted nervously. 

 

“ **_Don’t worry. This is going to be good. I feel it,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

_ “Your version of good differs from mine,”  _ Ursa replied. 

 

**_“Shush. I want to hear,”_ ** Dyna replied. Ursa sighed but began to listen.

 

“-we have called her the Herald for too long. It’s time to name a new head of the Inquisition. We could think of no one better than the woman who saved us. The bonded pair touched by Andraste. Herald, will you step up, take up the mantle once more, and lead us through these dark times?” Cassandra asked. 

 

Ursa felt trapped under the gazes of all the people around her. She knew what they thought. She’d saved them all. She was special. Maybe she was but she’d been looking forward to being done. To relaxing. Helping when she wished and traveling when she pleased. The Inquisition was becoming a Keep of its own. It seemed that daily people were showing up at Skyhold’s gates, willing to pledge themselves to the cause. Ursa had looked forward to being a part of the crowd.

 

**_“You knew that would never happen. You’ve done too well and the people believe in you more than they do in the cause,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

_ “Is it too much to ask to be left alone?”  _ Ursa asked in exasperation. 

 

“Herald?” Cassandra asked once more. 

 

Ursa shook her head to clear it. If she didn’t take the sword she didn’t know who would. Dyna was right. The Inquisition would fall apart without its figurehead. The people came to see her. They came to pledge themselves to her. Resigned, she nodded. 

 

“Yes. I will accept the honor,” she said, trying to cast her voice to all who stood below her. Cassandra handed her a sword. It was clearly ceremonial and Ursa quirked her eyebrow when Cassandra helped her heft it into the air. 

 

“Will you stand with your Inquisitor?” Cullen’s voice rang across the yard. The men’s answering cry was deafening. Ursa licked her lips and found him in the crowd. Their eyes locked and for a moment she felt her heart stop. 

“For the Inquisition!” he cried, breaking the contact as she lowered her arm and the people cheered. With a nod to the crowd, she backed up until she was next to Dorian. 

 

“Get Cullen. Tell him I need to speak with him in his office,” she whispered. 

 

Dorian smiled. “It’s about time,” he said, hurrying down the stairs as the people below began to scatter. 

 

____

 

URSA pulled herself up the stairs of the battlements and leaned on the wall, puffing heavily and rubbing her aching thigh. She’d left Dyna with the other dragons and had instructed her to distract Anscomb while she spoke to her Commander. 

 

“Inquisitor,” Cullen greeted as he came up the steps. 

 

“You’ve been avoiding me, Commander,” Ursa said, leaning on the wall to look over the people below. 

 

“I’ve been busy. And you’ve been healing,” he replied, coming to stand beside her. 

 

“No. Something’s wrong. It’s been wrong since before Haven but now you’re pulling back. Tell me why,” she ordered.  

 

He looked down at her, seeming to think about what to say. She waited, shifted her weight to her good foot and flexing her right hand. 

 

“I’ve stopped drinking dragon’s blood,” he said abruptly. 

 

“Oh,” Ursa said, unsure of where to start. She’d learned from the templars since their help in the Conclave. Dragon’s blood was like a drug. Addictive and destructive if used incorrectly. But to break from it could be worse. It could kill those who tried. A templar was what they were because of the blood they consumed. Whether they had bonded with a dragon or not, a templar could achieve great power on the blood but only if they took it regularly. Without it, their body would crave it and begin to fail. The strongest might make it through. Many did not. 

 

“I stopped when I first reached Haven. I’ve been...fine...but recently I’ve been feeling the effects. I’ve asked Cassandra to watch me. She’ll be ready to remove me from command should I...well should I no longer be fit to serve,” he said. 

 

“Cullen...why didn’t you come to me?” Ursa asked softly. 

 

He looked down. “At the start you didn’t know. You didn’t need to. Now? She’s known this the longest. She’ll notice before you do. You could be...clouded...in your decision.” 

 

Ursa leaned her back against the wall and faced the mountains. It was peaceful around them and she drank it in.

 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” she asked. 

 

“Dragon’s talons...nothing,” he muttered. “It’s nothing.” 

 

Doors slammed around them as the men went to work on the wall once more. They paused in their conversation as a group of soldiers walked by. They nodded as they passed and Ursa mustered a smile. When they’d gone, Cullen leaned beside her. 

 

“We lost Haven. You...you ran into that fight knowing...you could have…” he couldn’t seem to finish the thought, swallowing hard over the words. 

 

She touched his arm. “I didn’t. I’m fine. I’m glad you...everyone, I mean, made it out,” she confessed softly. 

 

He looked down at her leg in its cast. “I wouldn’t have been able to live with myself if you’d died. I let you go,” he said. 

 

Ursa could feel the precipice she stood on. She knew they were discussing more than just the loss of Haven. She shook her head. 

 

“You didn’t let me do anything,” she said, “I went. I was always going to go. And I’m  _ fine.  _ A few broken limbs aside, I’m fine. It was a small price to pay to save everyone and I would do it again.” 

 

“I know you would,” Cullen said quietly. He wanted to tell her he admired that. That she was the only person who had made him feel worthwhile in a very long time. But he was weak. His mind a wreck of memories he didn’t know how to beat away. He would never be enough of what she needed, even when she looked at him like she did now. He pushed off the wall and into the wind. “I’ve got work to do. Leliana was looking for you. I’ll see you around.”

 

“Oh,” she said, blinking at the abrupt dismissal. “Alright. Thank you for speaking with me.” 

 

He nodded curtly and left, misery on his face as he went. Ursa took a deep breath as the cold wind cut across the battlements. In that breeze was a scent. One she dreamt of in her fevered state. One she remembered as the only true memory of that night in the snow. A spicy scent that made her think of good ale and old books. She looked up sharply as Cullen ducked into his office. Her eyes squinted.

 

“Dorian,” she growled to herself and stalked clumsily down the battlements to find her friend. 

 

___

 

HE confessed fairly quickly to the facade. 

 

“Why didn’t you tell me it was Cullen who saved me? I wouldn’t think less of you for it, you should know that,” she ranted when she’d pushed him into her quarters. He paced the spacious room. 

 

“It wasn’t that,” Dorian denied, “The Commander asked me not to. He wanted you to believe it was me.” 

 

“Why?” Ursa asked, frustration clear in her voice. 

 

“You’d have to ask him that,” Dorian said.

 

Ursa flopped back on the obscenely large bed Josephine had ordered her. “I just spoke with him. It was going well but then he just shut down and left. Did I do something wrong?”

 

“You nearly died,” Dorian reasoned. 

 

“Shouldn’t that make him want to take me even more?” Ursa despaired. “Maybe he just doesn’t want me. Maybe I was right before. He isn’t interested and I’m making a fool of myself.” 

 

Dorian clicked his tongue. “No. That man wants you. Something is holding him back. Give him time. He’ll come around. Anyone that smitten has to.” 

 

Ursa groaned and pushed her face into her pillow. “It’s stupid,” she said, her words muffled.

 

“I know, bear,” Dorian said, thinking of the man he’d been watching lately and how panicked he felt over a simple smile. “I know.” 

 

____

 

IT took 6 weeks for Ursa to heal. When they removed her cast she was overjoyed and immediately flew to Cassandra, begging to go out into the woods. 

 

“I’m itching to run. Please?” she begged the Seeker, bouncing on her toes for the sheer novelty. 

 

“We’ll clear it with the doctor,” Cassandra said firmly. Ursa buzzed with excitement. 

 

She’d spoken very rarely to Cullen in her six weeks stuck in Skyhold. They’d watched each other when they didn’t think the other was looking but neither took the first step. When she was cleared to go out, Ursa began packing immediately and Cassandra went in search of the Commander. 

 

He was in his office staring at his computer screen, annoyance written on his face. 

 

“These scouts give terrible reports. When do you go back out? I can understand yours,” he said. 

 

“Two days. The Inquisitor has been cleared as well. She’s coming with us. Her and Dorian,” Cassandra said. 

 

Cullen looked up in shock, just as she’d expected him to. “Is she healthy enough for that? We did a light training yesterday but she isn’t nearly up to her old stamina. Her leg…”

 

“Cullen,” Cassandra said, pulling him from his rambling, “the doctor cleared her. She’ll be fine. We’ll be there. We won’t leave her. I just wanted to mention it to you. In case you had something you wanted to say to her before we went.” 

 

“Like what?” Cullen asked, the stubbornness setting into his face. Cassandra sighed. 

 

“Nothing. Nevermind.” 

 

“Say it,” Cullen ordered. 

 

Cassandra threw her hands up. “You love her! You’re in love with her! Instead of spending these six weeks wooing her you’ve treated her like she’s contracted the plague. Dyna’s learned to fly. Her body has healed. Six weeks have gone by and you’ve done nothing to show her you care, despite clear evidence to the contrary.”

 

“Cassandra,” Cullen said gravely, “I can’t. I’m not...I’m not what she needs.”

 

Cassandra leaned on his desk. “How about you let her decide that?”

 

When he didn’t respond she snorted in disgust and shook her head. “Fine,” she said, crossing her arms. “We leave in two days. Do with that what you will.” 

 

Cullen didn’t look up until she had left. With his door soundly shut, he buried his head in his hands. 

 

**_“You could tell her. Cassandra is right. You should let her decide what she needs,”_ ** Anscomb said from his place at Cullen’s feet. 

 

“I can’t,” Cullen replied. “She’s reckless. She won’t understand what she’s getting into.” 

 

**_“You don’t want to let yourself be happy. I understand. Everything you’ve ever loved has been stripped from you. Distorted until you were blind with hatred. But this could be different. She wants to be with you. You know as much yet you don’t allow yourself to have it. It could be so easy.”_ **

 

“And if she turns me away?” Cullen asked on a whisper. 

 

**_“Life isn’t always perfect. In fact, it rarely is. I doubt she ever would but if she did? We would take it.”_ **

 

“What if I tell her what I’ve done and she’s disgusted?” Cullen nearly whimpered. 

 

**_“She won’t. I’ve said it many times. You are no monster, Cullen. You’re a man who made some tough choices. She will understand that. She might be one of the only ones who truly can. You’re fighting this because you’re scared. I wish you’d let yourself be scared with her. At least then you wouldn’t be alone.”_ **

 

“I’m not alone. I have you,” Cullen answered. 

 

**_“I can’t keep you warm at night or fill your heart. Not like a mate can. She’s going away again. Think about it while she’s gone. Maybe you’ll have changed her mind by the time she comes back,”_ ** Anscomb said. 

 

Cullen shook his head and pushed it from his mind. He couldn’t linger on auburn hair and teal colored eyes. He made himself focus on the reports, trying to rid himself of the picture of freckles on a smiling face. 

 

___

 

URSA inhaled the crisp air of the sea. She’d missed the ocean. It was close to the Dalish keep by dragon flight. She’d visited many times before the Inquisition and she took a moment to appreciate it as they stood on the Storm Coast. 

 

“Four regions, four weeks,” Varric said, his fingers flying over the keys on his phone as he typed. “It’s been quite a ride.” 

 

“I’ve missed being out,” Ursa confessed, “I might have been a bit overzealous.” 

 

“It’s paid off,” Iron Bull huffed. He was a large man who wore only a frayed tank top and cutoffs even when fighting. His brute strength made him a good ally and he had the sense of humor Ursa though the group was lacking. “The people are proud to meet ya, boss.” 

 

“I, for one, could use a hot shower,” Dorian muttered. 

 

“We’ll head back in  few days. I need to speak with the mayor in Crestwood before we go,” Ursa said. Dyna sidled up beside her. In their six weeks of healing she’d reached her full size. Ursa could now climb on her back and fly, though it made the others nervous. 

 

“You could use some flying lessons,” Cassandra said pointedly as Ursa launched herself onto her dragon’s back. 

 

“It’s not that hard,” Ursa said, rolling her eyes. 

 

“Until you hit combat midair,” Cassandra challenged. 

 

“Fine,” Ursa sighed, “When we’re back I’ll ask the master to teach me.” 

 

“Not Cullen?” Dorian asked. 

 

“No. He’s busy enough as it is,” Ursa dismissed, her breezy attitude fooling no one. Iron Bull shook his head at her back and snorted when Varric rolled his eyes theatrically. Cassandra ducked into her pack but said nothing. She’d warned Cullen of this outcome. She wouldn’t push herself into his business anymore. When they returned he could deal with what he’d caused. 

 

The group moved on chatting about what they most looked forward to when they returned home. 

 

___

 

ON their third day back in Skyhold, Dorian found Cullen in the gardens. He was staring at a chess set with a wistful expression. 

 

“Would you like to play?” Dorian asked. Cullen looked up, startled.

 

“You play?” he asked. 

 

“Very well,” Dorian grinned. 

 

“Alright. Where’s Audri?” Cullen asked as he set up the board. Dorian sat, crossing his legs. 

 

“Flying lessons. I made her watch Dyna and Ursa. They aren’t exactly the best at safety. Audri’s acting as a safety net,” Dorian said. He made his first move and sat back. 

 

Cullen had nice hands, Dorian noted. They moved over the pieces with confidence. 

 

“Yes, they do run into danger quite quickly,” Cullen said absently. 

 

Dorian wondered if he was like Ursa. Quick to latch onto any conversation involving the other. They might think they were fooling people but Dorian knew better. They were both pining. 

 

“Your move,” Cullen prompted. 

 

Dorian looked down at the board. “She flew into a fight last week. Dove off of Dyna to close a rift. Just stood in the center of the fighting and closed it. It was...terrifying. She’d recruited Cole to join us but he left after that. Her recklessness made him uneasy so he returned here. I hear he’s helping with the injured.” 

 

“She what?” Cullen asked, looking up from his turn. 

 

Dorian clucked his tongue. “I know. I was very upset with her but she didn’t seem to care. She said it was fun.” 

 

“She’s going to get herself killed,” Cullen blustered. 

 

Dorian nodded, silently congratulating himself for finding out what he’d hoped. Cullen did care, he was just hiding it. 

 

“That’s what I’ve told her. She needs a keeper. But she’s having none of it. She likes the danger now. She’s grown used to her position here. Though I do wonder if she’s being so reckless because of that,” Dorian said. He took his turn and sat back, pleased with the reaction he was receiving. Cullen muttered and Dorian dropped the subject. Instead, he brought up the books he’d been reading and Skyhold’s ever growing population. 

 

The game passed pleasantly from there and only paused when Ursa found them. Cullen stood abruptly.

 

“Are you forfeiting? Does that mean I win?” Dorian asked.

 

Ursa smirked, quirking her eyebrow in the way that she knew drove Dorian crazy. He knew it meant she was feeling especially mischievous. 

 

“Don’t stop on my account,” she said. 

 

Cullen sunk back into his seat.

 

“Good, you’ll get to see me win,” Dorian boasted. 

 

“Really? Because I just won,” Cullen crowed. He grinned as Dorian studied the board. 

 

Dorian huffed. “Don’t get smug. There’ll be no living with you,” he said, standing. 

 

He passed Ursa, waggling his eyebrows at her as he went. She stuck her tongue out before sinking into his seat. 

 

“Well,” Cullen said, “I suppose it’s back to work.”

 

“Unless,” Ursa started so Cullen looked back at her, “Unless you’d like to play.” 

 

“You play?” he asked. 

 

“Not well, but I’ll scrape by,” she replied. 

 

It was an olive branch. One Dorian wouldn’t miss for anything. He pulled a small book from his back pocket and sat on a bench far across the gardens. He peaked over the top, watching as Cullen set up the board and Ursa spoke softly. They looked happy. Cautiously so. Dorian startled when a body dropped down beside him. 

 

“The boss’ boss finally making a move?” the young man asked. Dorian looked over at Krem in surprise. 

 

Krem had come with the Chargers, Iron Bull’s group of fighters. He was delicate faced but strong and he’d caught Dorian’s eye the moment he’d walked through the gates. A little crass and boisterous, he was the kind of man Dorian always fell for. His kindness made Dorian feel off kilter. The rider from Tevinter was used to dark hallways and partners who always left with vulgar smiles. Krem was different. He smiled at Dorian in the daylight. Brushed their hands together at dinner. Winked when a dirty joke made the whole table roar. He’d tried to keep his budding feelings from showing, especially while Ursa healed, but with Krem sitting beside him he couldn’t hide it very well. 

 

“More like extending a hand in friendship, I think,” Dorian replied. 

 

Krem grinned easily, stretching so his thigh pressed along Dorian’s. “That’s always a good first step into something more. Would you like to be friends?” 

 

Dorian blinked. “Y...yes,” he stuttered. 

 

“Good,” Krem said with a nod, “Now let’s listen.” 

 

“They’re spying on us, aren’t they?” Cullen asked as he took his turn. He was covert with his look over Ursa’s shoulder, making the gaze look organic as he pretended to stretch his arms behind his back. 

 

“Maybe. But Dorian likes Krem. He pretends he doesn’t, but I know him too well. Let them watch. Neither of them will say anything. Dorian doesn’t get the warm fuzzies very often and he deserves it,” Ursa said, smiling down at the board. Dyna was watching too and she was keeping up a running commentary on Krem and Dorian’s interactions. She had curled under a rose bush to watch her partner’s conversation and game and was enjoying the view of both. Ursa was happy for her friend. She didn’t allow herself to turn around to look, instead keeping her gaze on the pieces of the board. 

 

Cullen watched Ursa’s lips curve upward and vowed to give her anything to make her smile again. He’d missed it more than he thought he had. He was kidding himself if he thought he could stay away from her. Just a single smile and he remembered why he’d wanted her in the first place. It was foolish to think he could pretend the feeling wasn’t there. 

 

“Cullen?” she said, peering up at him, her bright eyes curious. He’d waited too long to respond. He smiled at her and watched her relax back into her chair, a smiling lighting her eyes before it made it to her mouth. 

 

“Alright,” he said, not looking away from her face, “We’ll just play.” 

 

____

 

THE game took a long time. Each turn Ursa took, Cullen blocked her. She got the impression he was making the game longer than it needed to be, but she wasn’t complaining. They talked about his family and hers, laughing over old antics and memories. 

 

“When did you first meet Dorian?” Cullen asked. He moved his piece in the wrong direction to win and tucked his hands under his chin. 

 

Ursa smiled before she could stop herself, the memory a soft one. 

 

“He was 18, coming to the Keep training for the first time. I was 17, newly promoted and being used to entertain the new riders. I gave them tours, talked with them, made them feel welcome. That kind of thing. They were all rude. I hated them all and was gritting my teeth to get through it when Dorian found me. He saw me against the wall and told me I looked as if I’d swallowed a lemon whole. At first I thought he was going to tell me I’d look prettier if I smiled and if he’d done that I would’ve punched him but instead he told me to purse my lips more. So I did. Each time I did what he asked, it got more ridiculous. By the end we were laughing so hard I could hardly breathe and I snorted. He told me I was the most unladylike tour guide he’d ever had. And that was it. We just...bonded,” Ursa said. 

 

“You were young,” Cullen commented. Ursa moved a piece and shrugged. 

 

“9 years ago now but it feels like I’ve known him my whole life. He looks out for me. I do the same for him. He’s my family. Even more than my parents or siblings are,” she said. 

 

Cullen made his move, placing his pieces for her to win. Behind Ursa, Dorian yawned and Krem took the opportunity to move a breath closer. 

 

“ **_Seems everyone’s making their move today,”_ ** Anscomb said warmly.

 

“ _ Dragon’s talons, I’m not making a move,”  _ Cullen replied. He was surprised that Anscomb was even there. He had been on rounds when the game had started. 

 

“ **_One of you needs to,”_ ** Anscomb retorted. For a moment, Cullen though he heard teal laughter peal across his mind but it was gone as soon as it had touched him. 

 

“I win,” Ursa said, startling him from his conversation. He looked down at the board in surprise. She had indeed won. He’d meant for her to but he wasn’t thinking it would happen so soon. 

 

“You did,” he said, looking up at her. “I might need to work on my skills.”

 

“Please. You let me win. But thank you, it was fun,” Ursa said. She leaned forward, her elbows on the table. She watched his face, waiting for it to close off as he remembered whatever it was that made him back away from her. Instead, he smiled. It dazzled her. He had a scar on his lip that she’d dreamed about running her finger over. She watched the mark as his lips curved.

 

“I think this is the longest we’ve ever gone without discussing the Inquisition,” he said. 

 

Ursa’s heart pounded at the words and at his soft smile. He wasn’t rearing back. Wasn’t going cold on her. She took a shaking breath and took the plunge. 

 

“We should do it more often,” she said. 

 

He ducked his head, his expression hidden from her for a moment before he looked up. He was still smiling. She let her relief show on her face. 

 

“I’d like that,” he said. 

 

Cullen felt a flutter in his chest. The sunlight was streaming through the canopy above them and it lit her hair into a red halo. The freckles across her nose made her milky skin all the more beautiful and the scar he longed to touch on her forehead showed when she pushed her hair back behind her ear. She was perfect. And she wanted to spend time with him still. He smiled, this time without schooling the affection from his gaze. 

 

“Me too,” she said. 

 

“You already said that,” he replied softly.  

 

She bit her lip and looked down at the board, a blush coloring her cheeks. “Oh.” 

 

He wanted to reach across the table and touch her cheek but he held back. Instead, he stood. He offered her his hand as he reached her side of the small table. She took it with a small smile. He helped her to her feet and waited for her to brush off her pants before cocking his head towards the door. She nodded. They didn’t speak as they walked, instead sneaking glances at one another out of the corner of their eyes. When they were gone, Dyna slid out from the rose bush and shook out her wings. Anscomb walked forward from his hiding place behind a bench, causing Dorian to laugh. 

 

“Were we all watching them?” he asked. 

 

**“It seems so,”** Anscomb said, shaking dirt from his tail. 

 

“I would’ve brought Audri if I’d known it was to be a show,” Dorian said. 

 

“Cecil was entertaining her, I’m sure she had fun,” Krem said, his smile wide. Krem’s dragon was a bone hunter. They’d originally been bred for war and found partners that could be versatile and strong. Cecil was off white and thin but strong enough to carry Krem into battle when it was necessary. Audri had shown interest in the dragon’s abilities. Her own being that of lightening and electricity. Where hers came from cunning, his came from strength. She marvelled at such power, just as Dorian did. It didn’t surprise the man that his dragon was infatuated with Cecil.  

 

“ **Audri is definitely having fun,”** Dyna snickered. “ **Just like they would be if they’d ever commit.”**

 

**“Cullen doesn’t believe he deserves her. There’s more in his past than he likes to say,”** Anscomb said sadly. 

 

“ **And she believes she isn’t the hero he thinks her to be,”** Dyna said.

 

“So they’re a match made in heaven,” Dorian said dryly. 

 

“Give them time. It can be hard to tell someone you like them,” Krem said, shooting a playful grin at Dorian. Dorian flushed and the dragons laughed. 

 

“ **I have to go finish my rounds. Next time there’s a moment, do tell me sooner. I wish to see,”** Anscomb purred to Dyna. He flicked his tail against her hindquarters so the younger dragon jumped. She hissed playfully at him as he slid by her. When she turned she saw Dorian’s and Krem’s expressions. 

 

“ **What?”** she asked. 

 

“Nothing,” Dorian said innocently. “Nothing at all.” 

 

___

 

“THE Hinterlands. Again,” Ursa told Sera as she packed. She’d become proficient at packing for a trip, making quick work of pants, boots, shirts, and sports bras. Thanks to her training with Cullen, she could now shoot her gun with pretty solid accuracy and she’d gotten stronger with her legs so that even the flying master had been impressed with her abilities in combat on Dyna’s back. 

 

There were still more tasks to be done. Still more people to help. Those who hadn’t escaped the templar’s enchantment and the tainted blood they were fed were terrorizing the countryside. In the rural areas of feral country the dragons were now fighting side by side with the tainted templars. Ursa would start off in the Hinterlands and then travel to a mine across the country where she’d heard the blood was being sourced at. She wanted to find the source for her and for Cullen. He’d looked so pained when he’d told her of his old commander, Samson, and how he was selling his men to the rift dragon they’d fought. She needed to stop it, if only to take a pebble of weight off of Cullen’s shoulders. 

 

“I’ll pass,” Sera said with a sneer. “I’ve seen enough bears for a lifetime.” 

 

“You’d think they’d be mostly gone by now, but no,” Ursa said, struck by the number of bears she’d killed in her months of the Inquisition. 

 

“Where are you going after?” Sera quierred. 

 

“Some mine out by the sea. Then hopefully back here, but I don’t know yet. Sure you don’t want to join?” Ursa asked again. 

 

“Nope. You go, bud. Ever since that big bad dropped out of the sky and a dragon who’s not a dragon joined up I’ve been wondering why I’m even here. I’ll stay here by the pub, thanks,” Sera said. 

 

“You okay?” Ursa asked. She hadn’t stopped to speak with her friend much. She’d been too busy. While Solas was stoic, Iron Bull unshakable, and her council always ready for whatever came next, Sera was sarcastic. While Sera was usually sarcastic, this was the kind that meant she was upset. It had a bite to it that her usual humor didn’t. 

 

“No,” Sera said, her voice shaking slightly. “Save the people, stop a turf war, protect our way of life. All good. All worth fighting for. This? It’s a bit much. A dragon going around thinking it’s a Fade god. Men and their dragons going mad on tainted blood. The ferals killing anything that moves. It all adds up to a giant not good. If I wasn’t sure this was the safest place to be I’d have run for the hills by now.” 

 

Ursa sat beside her friend. “It is a lot. But I need whatever you can give,” she said quietly. She didn’t want to be cruel but everyone was working hard. It wouldn’t be fair if Sera wasn’t. No one had the luxury of choice anymore. 

 

“I know. I’m giving it. Red Jenny is helping that spy of yours. I go when she needs me. When I think it’s too far for her to be alone. Just...not on your travels, yeah?” Sera said. “Much rather be at the hands of pitiful higher ups who’ve never fought than do what you do.” 

 

Ursa nodded with a grim smile. “Alright. Sounds fair. I’ve got to go. I’ll see you when I come back.”

 

“Be safe,” Sera said, watching her friend run into danger once again. 

 

____

 

URSA had one thing left to do before she left. In the few days since her chess game with Cullen she’d found any reason she could to end up in his office yet she could never bring herself to say the things she wished to. She wanted to do it before she left. If she found the tainted blood source and Samson she wanted to be able to come home to him. She didn’t want to be in the delicate dance they seemed to have going. Not anymore. They’d wasted too much time as it was. She put on Dorian’s favorite green shirt and a borrowed pair of jeans from Josephine’s closet. She was determined to do it right. She wanted to look nice. She wanted Cullen to remember what she looked like at her best while she was away. She was packed and ready to go but like Dorian had said once before, now was the time to try for happiness. 

 

He was at his desk when she reached his office and she paused at the door to study him. His hair was getting long. Sly curls were falling into his face. He absently pushed them back, his gloves beside him on his desk and his fur lined cape, the one Ursa looked for whenever she passed the new training grounds, was hung up behind him. He muttered to himself as he typed, his fingers slow on the keys as if he’d never quite learned properly. She smiled, knocking on the door jam to let him know she was there.  He looked up, his face twisting for a moment before he recognized her. 

 

“Oh, it’s you. Thank heavens,” he sighed, relaxing back into his chair. 

 

“Expecting more reports?” Ursa asked, amused. 

 

“They’re never ending. If I thought I was busy before...I’ll do it, dragon’s talons, I don’t mean to sound ungrateful or-” he rubbed the back of his neck as he babbled. 

 

“Cullen,” Ursa chuckled, cutting him off. “I understand. It’s exhausting. I suppose you don’t have a minute then?” 

 

“I...do you need something?” he asked. 

 

“It’s not...I’m leaving later tonight if Cassandra’s ready by then. I just had something I wanted to talk to you about. It’s not work related,” Ursa said, feeling as if it were her turn to babble. She looked at the ceiling, a flush working its way up her neck. She felt the tips of her ears heat and tried to stop the pounding of her heart with subtle deep breaths. 

 

Cullen watched her blush then looked down at Anscomb. The dragon puffed a shot of smoke at him. 

 

**_“Put down the reports and talk to her. You’ll regret it if you don’t.”_ **

 

“Where’s Dyna?” Cullen asked the blushing woman in front of him. The green of her shirt made her skin seem like milk. For a moment he indulged in the thought of running his hands along her arms and pulling her into him. 

 

“What? Oh. She’s getting fit for mount gear. It’ll be my first official time out with her in combat capacity so Cassandra insisted. I’m sorry if I bothered you-” Ursa wrung her hands, turning to go. She blushed miserably, cursing her own idiocy.  

 

“No!” Cullen cried. She jumped at his sudden volume. “Dragon’s talons...don’t go. I have time,” he muttered. 

 

“Oh,” she said on an exhale. “Okay.” 

 

They walked out into the crisp air of the battlements. There were soldiers walking past them, nodding as they went. Anscomb subtly closed the office door so he could listen in his partner’s mind without any outside interference. Meanwhile, Ursa looked out over the walls to the mountains. 

 

“It’s...a nice day,” Cullen said, wincing when she replied blankly.

 

“What?” 

 

“It’s...a nice...you wanted to talk?” he said, his voice strained. 

 

“Not about the weather,” Ursa said, her right eyebrow ticking upward. He’d meant to ask her where she’d learned that. It was an enticing trick. 

 

“Yes...I...I wondered what I’d say to you...if we ever…” he trailed off. 

 

“Why didn’t you tell me it was you that night?” Ursa blurted. She’d been holding the words in for weeks. She felt a rush of relief at saying them, even though Cullen looked startled and then abashed. 

 

“Dorian told you,” he said matter of factly.  

 

“No. I figured it out. You...well you have a very specific smell. God, that’s embarrassing to say- I remembered it. You...you carried me back. You held me all night long. But you weren’t there when I woke up. Why didn’t you tell me? I dreamt it was you but I just thought I’d made it up. Wishful thinking,” she said. 

 

“You...wanted it to be me?” he asked, sounding surprised. 

 

“Christ, Cullen, how could you not know that?” Ursa laughed, embarrassed that she had to say it.

 

“I…” he didn’t seem to know how to respond. She turned to face him fully. 

 

“You’ve wondered what you’d say to me. So what did you come up with?” she asked, challenging him as best she could. 

 

Her bright eyes locked with his and suddenly he was lost. He swallowed hard. “I never thought I’d find this. Not here. Not  _ ever _ . I’m not sure I deserve it but dragon’s talons do I want it.”   

 

She gave him a faint smile. “That was pretty good. I give you a solid B+ on performance. It was a little late or it’d be an A,” she joked. He laughed softly, suddenly feeling very close to her. The smile sunk from her face as her eyes flicked down to take in his mouth before coming back up to his eyes. 

 

He leaned in, ready to finally taste her when someone called his name. He turned, foggy as to what was said and furious for the distraction. 

 

“What?” he growled at the scout in front of him.

 

“You wanted Leliana’s report sir. Right away, you said,” the man said, oblivious.

 

“What?” Cullen repeated more dangerously. 

 

The scout’s gaze finally rested on Ursa, her head turned in embarrassment. Realization dawned in his eyes. 

 

“Oh,” he said. “Or on your desk.” He backed away quickly, leaving them, but the moment was broken.

 

“Look, if you need to-” Ursa started only to suddenly be crowded against the wall. Cullen’s mouth was on hers, his body pressed firmly to her own. She gasped in surprise, her hands flexing at her sides before relaxing and coming to grip his arms. 

 

Cullen felt only relief as her mouth parted slightly beneath his. He’d driven her back without asking, without warning and he was half waiting for her to spurn him even now. Instead, she melted against him. Her hands pulled on his arms as they held her waist, trying to get him even closer. Her mouth was soft and pliant and she was kissing him back. He pulled away with effort, resting his forehead on hers. 

 

“Jesus Christ,” she laughed breathlessly. 

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-” he started. She stopped him with a light kiss. 

 

“That was perfect. Don’t even think about apologizing,” she said when she’d pulled back.

 

“Alright,” he conceded with his own laugh. They stayed there for a moment longer, both drinking in the feeling of the other finally in their arms. 

 

“Cassandra’s probably-”

 

“I really do need-” 

 

They both spoke at the same time and stopped, laughing giddily. 

 

“You have to go,” he said.

 

“And you have to work,” she replied. 

 

He inhaled deeply. “You smell like trees and honeysuckle,” he offered. “Ever since that night I’ve had it in my mind.” 

 

She shook her head against his. “This was ridiculous. We waited so long.” 

 

He cupped her face in his hands, looking into her eyes. “No more,” he vowed.

 

She smiled. “No more,” she promised. 

 

He pushed away from the wall with difficulty. It would be easy to pretend he didn’t have piles of work. If she would stay locked in his arms he would gladly give up his duties. But she had her own duties to attend to. She looked as regretful as he did when he stepped farther back. 

 

“Send me your reports while you’re in the field?” he asked.

 

She nodded slowly, her eyes running down his body then back to his face. “Of course, Commander. Anything you need.” 

 

He chuckled as she turned to go. It was the first time he felt free to watch her walk away with appreciation. He had no doubt someone had seen. The rumors would spread through Skyhold like wildfire but he couldn’t find it in him to care. Not really. When she’d disappeared down the stairs he turned back to his office and his duties thinking about her mouth with every step. 

 

____

 

**_“DID it go well?”_ ** Anscomb asked slyly when Cullen returned.

 

“You listened. I could feel you,” Cullen said dismissively. 

 

“ **_Yes, but I want you to tell me,”_ ** the dragon huffed. “ **_I want you to admit that I was right this whole time.”_ **

 

“Fine. It was wonderful,” Cullen confessed, unable to keep the smile from his face.

 

“ **_About time,”_ ** Anscomb said smugly. Cullen snorted and got back to his work, her scent still clinging to the air around him. 


	7. 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa stops Samson. The group discusses what to do about Ursa and Cullen's relationship. A plot to kill Celene unfolds. They finally learn the name of the dragon who destroyed Haven. Ursa and Cullen plan a date.

Chapter 7

 

URSA had gotten better at killing people. It was not something she wished to brag about but she no longer threw up with every kill. She stared with grim satisfaction at the dead templars. They’d shown no mercy and had received none. Once more, Ursa had heard the whispered words in her mind. Old dragon tongue had spilled from her lips and the templars had begun to scream in pain. She’d wiped them out easily. Samson had yielded, fear in his gaze when she stood before him. His men were dead, his armor built of dragon scales destroyed. He no longer had any fight left. He was tied and ready to be picked up, leaving Ursa to sit and contemplate. 

 

“Ready to go home?” Solas asked, surprising her. She looked up. 

 

“Yes. No. I don’t want to have to tell him what I did,” she admitted, thinking of what disappointment would look like on Cullen’s face and wincing. “I didn’t used to be like this. I cried at every death. Now it’s all just...death. I see it. I cause it. Life continues. It isn’t supposed to be like that.”

 

“I can’t claim to know how love works but this is life. You are a source of pure Fade power. You and Dyna. If he loves you, he must know that,” Solas said. 

 

Ursa laughed dryly. “I’m not sure he loves me. I kissed him on the battlements then left for five weeks. For all I know he’s met some waitress or warrior and I’m out of his mind.” 

 

“That’s idiotic. I didn’t think you prone to idiocy,” Solas said mildly. 

 

Ursa waved her hand at him, her wrist cracking so she winced. “Whatever. Any more thoughts on the voice in my head? I’d like to know who’s helping me. This would’ve been far worse without it.” 

 

“Unfortunately, no,” Solas said, “But we can be thankful for it anyway.”

 

“I am,” Ursa said. She leaned back against a boulder and sighed. “Andraste knows I am. I’m just tired.”

 

“Well then it’s good that it’s time to leave,” Solas said, gesturing to the car they’d called to get them. It would be hours until they reached Skyhold. The ride wouldn’t consist of sleeping but rather phone calls and reports. The work never seemed to end, now. Ursa let out a long groan as she stood. 

 

“Thank goodness,” she said. 

 

___

 

CULLEN closed his eyes against the pain. It shot up his back and into his arms, all while his mind played tricks on him. It had been days of pain and hallucinations. He’d thought he’d seen Ursa, bloodied and crying, on the dining hall floor. He’d seen Meredith, his old commander, slitting the throats of his friends and their dragons, a bloody, gleeful, smile on her face. He saw the bars of the cage they’d locked him in when they’d tried to break him from Anscomb. His bones ached with old tortures h’d hoped to forget. 

 

“ **_Cullen…”_ ** Anscomb fretted. The dragon had taken as much of the pain and horror that he could but Cullen needed to work through it on his own.

 

Cullen stumbled to his bookshelf where he kept his last shot of blood. It was meant to remind him that he could be strong. He pulled it from its case with trembling hands.

 

“ **_Cullen, don’t,”_ ** Anscomb said, real fear in his voice. It shot like fire across Cullen’s mind. He waved his hand dismissively, not looking up from the needle. 

 

“I won’t give less to them. To  _ her,”  _ he whispered fiercely. 

 

“ **_It isn’t less. It won’t be. Don’t do this. We decided we were done. No more blood. We’ll be fine. This is the worst of it. You can make it through. Please, let me help you,”_ ** Anscomb pleaded. He wound around Cullen’s legs, his tail flicking at his partner’s arms, trying to looser Cullen’s grip on the needle. 

 

Cullen ignored the dragon, touching the tip of the needle to his arm with trembling fingers.

 

“Cassandra won’t remove me from my position. She promised me she would watch. That she would be impartial!” he roared. 

 

“ **_What if she is? What if she doesn’t think you need to be removed? Only you do?”_ ** Anscomb tried to soothe his partner’s mind but Cullen was past the point of hearing him. He stared down at the needle, hoping for a sign. 

 

___

 

CASSANDRA warned Ursa of Cullen’s pain as they walked back into Skyhold. She’d been holding onto the knowledge for a few days, his recent email worrying her and phone call worrying her. 

 

“The Commander called me earlier. Before we went into the mine. He wishes to step down. He says he is no longer able to work. I refused but I fear...he will lose his drive if we take this from him. He needs this to keep going. If he stops, he might die. If he takes the blood again he will lose a part of himself in the process. I fear he can’t see that anymore,” Cassandra said. 

 

Ursa stopped. “You think he’ll take the blood again?”

 

“If he thinks it will help, yes,” Cassandra said gravely. “He fears being useless more than he fears for his own well being.” 

 

“Will he be in his office?” Ursa asked, looking up to the tower Cullen’s office sat in. 

 

Cassandra nodded. Without another word, Ursa ran. Dyna flew behind her, people scattering as they went. Cassandra watched, grim hope written on her face. 

 

“You waited to tell him no so she could handle it, didn’t you?” Dorian asked. He’d noticed the hushed but angry phone calls Cassandra had at night. He now understood why she’d hidden it from Ursa. 

 

“She might be the only one he’ll listen to now,” Cassandra said. 

 

Dorian watched the green dragon launch up the battlements, Ursa gripping the handle on the side of Dyna’s riding gear.  He sighed, wishing her luck silently, before heading to his room. 

 

____

 

URSA shoved open the door without knocking. There was a loud cry and then the sound of glass shattering. She flinched, turning as the object clattered to the floor beside her.

 

“Dragon’s talons! I didn’t see you,” Cullen heaved. His head was drooped, his hands clinging to the edges of his desk. Ursa feared he would break it for how white his knuckles were. 

 

“Cullen?” Ursa said softly, entering the room slowly. She closed the door behind her leaving Dyna to peer through the window. 

 

“I gave myself to the order as a child. It was all I’d ever dreamed of. For years I was satisfied. Then the rebellion hit and I was...the last one of my kind left there. The dragons took us. They tried to break my mind. They tried to pull me from Anscomb. I fought until I was brought out of that place. I stayed alive by locking myself away, not giving one inch of myself to them or to anyone. Then came Meredith. She destroyed the order, led us to destruction. I walked away. I gave up the blood for the Inquisition. I saw what it did to our kind. But I can’t give less now. I  _ won’t, _ ” he ground out. 

 

Ursa eased closer. Anscomb looked at her pleadingly. He was pinning Cullen’s feet to the ground, his tail wound around the man’s legs as if trying to root him to the ground. She nodded at him. Anscomb slowly released Cullen, sliding backwards. 

 

“You aren’t giving less,” she said gently. 

 

“I should be taking it,” he muttered.

 

“Cullen,” she said more strongly. He looked up at her. For a moment his eyes cleared but then his face twisted. 

 

“No! I should be taking it!” he cried, slamming his hand into the bookshelf beside his desk. Books rained down to the floor with the force of the hit. “I should,” he said, sliding to the ground. She knelt in front of him tentatively touching his knee. 

 

“Don’t think about the Inquisition. What do you want? I’ll support whatever you want to do but it has to be what  _ you  _ want,” she said, reaching out to touch his face. He flinched at the touch. She didn’t remove her hand. Cupping his cheek, she waited until he looked up at her. “What do you want?” she asked again softly. 

 

“I want...to stop. I don’t want to take it,” he said, sagging. 

 

“Then don’t,” she said, relief flooding her. She knew the withdrawal could kill him but he was so close. She believed what Cassandra had said. Cullen needed the Inquisition to get through and he needed to be free of the blood. It hurt her heart to think he would take it just to help service the Inquisition. She would never ask it of him. He was so much stronger than he though. She looked him in the eye, her affection obvious on her face.  “We’ll make it through this. Us, okay?”

 

He sighed, pressing his lips to her palm like he had in Haven so long ago. “Yes. Together.” 

 

She smiled tenderly. “Yes,” she said, putting her right hand on his face as well, cradling it gently. 

 

“Come here,” he said, pulling her forward. She fell against him with a surprised gasp, settling into the space between his knees. “I just need to be selfish. Just for a moment,” he murmured against her head.

 

“I stink,” she protested. 

 

“No,” he denied. The scent of her skin was still strong. Trees and honeysuckle. There was blood and dirt mixed in. Sweat and days worth of fighting but beneath it was her core scent, the one he remembered in a cool breeze and in his dreams. It grounded him. She wasn’t gone. No one was harming her. He wouldn’t need the blood. He could be strong. With her cradled against him, he believed it. He closed his eyes and just held on. 

 

Ursa let him hold her, motioning for Anscomb to allow Dyna into the room. Dyna slid in, looking first at Cullen and Ursa then to Anscomb. The two dragons spoke silently to one another before Dyna let out a small cry and curled her form around Anscomb. Ursa could feel Dyna’s anguish in her mind. She smiled softly when Dyna sent comfort to Anscomb. Dyna rubbed her wings along his sides and slid her muzzle along his long neck. Ursa watched the beautiful display in awe. It wasn’t just comfort. It was a bonding dance, one the dragons had waited to perform and could no longer deny. 

 

“Cullen,” Ursa whispered, “Look.” 

 

He opened his eyes. In front of them, their dragons pledged themselves to one another. The winding ritual was one he’d seen only a handful of times. Dragons were particular when picking a mate and even more particular about who saw the moment of a bonding pledge. It was a dance of bodies meant to allow the other dragon into their minds forever. It was a ritual of acceptance and purity, one that humans on their own could never replicate. Anscomb slid over Dyna only to have their positions switch. Wings fluttered and neck’s curled around, their colors mingling as they moved. Power surged in both Cullen and Ursa’s minds, a mingling of colors painting joyous whispers. Ursa saw the reds and golds of Anscomb’s soothing voice just as Cullen felt Dyna’s green and brown speech paint across his pained mind. 

 

“Oh,” Ursa breathed, leaning back against him. 

 

“I can feel her in my mind,” Cullen whispered. 

 

“I can feel Anscomb. It’s beautiful,” Ursa replied. 

 

“Do you have somewhere you need to be?” Cullen asked, his eyes on their dragons.

 

“No,” Ursa hummed, “Not now.” 

 

“Good,” Cullen replied, “Stay. Not...just stay.” 

 

She leaned back into him more, his arm snug around her waist. “I will,” she sighed, the rainbow of their voices a beautiful canvas in her mind, “I will.” 

 

For the moment they didn’t think about blood or the dead templars who had fallen to its call. For a single beautiful moment they could see only the calm after the storm. 

 

_____

 

DORIAN was surprised to find Krem waiting for him when he got to his room. He looked at his piles of books in embarrassment but Krem didn’t seem concerned. He was sitting on Dorian’s bed, fiddling with a bookmark Dorian had left out. 

 

“I have something I need to tell you,” Krem said. Dorian tensed, waiting for Krem to say what they all did. Thanks but no thanks. Too bad, but it just wasn’t worth it. The same speech Dorian had heard a million times over. 

 

“No! It’s not...Aw fuck, I didn’t start this right. I like you. A lot. The boss keeps telling me to suck it up and tell you so here I am. But there’s a little side note I have to mention first. I’m not...sexually I…” Krem trailed off and Dorian cocked his head.

 

“I know,” he said slowly. If that was all Krem had to confess it was turning out to be a better evening than he’d planned. 

 

“You..you do?” Krem paused. 

 

“Audri told me. Cecil told her,” Dorian said.

 

“When?” Krem asked incredulously.

 

“About a month ago. He was trying to impress her,” Dorian said with a noncommittal shrug. 

 

“You’ve known for a month and didn’t say anything?” Krem demanded.

 

Dorian shrugged. “It wasn’t my place. If you’d wanted to tell me, you would have. It didn’t change anything, anyhow. To me you’re, well, a man. A better man than most I’ve met.” 

 

Krem stood slowly and approached Dorian. He smiled slowly, looking like a cat on the prowl. Dorian didn’t retreat. This was what he wanted, what he’d been waiting for. He smiled at the advance. 

 

“I’ve just told you I like you, Dorian Pavus. Whatever are you going to do about it?” Krem purred. 

 

Dorian fisted his hand in Krem’s shirt. “Let me show you,” he replied. 

 

___

 

URSA woke on Cullen’s floor. Her back ached from the position and her right hand was numb but her commander was behind her and she felt no remorse. She stretched with a wide yawn.

 

“Dragon’s talons,” Cullen groaned as he too awoke, “I’m too old for this.” 

 

“Tell me about it,” Ursa said, arching her back to stretch it. 

 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you sleep here,” he said sleepily. It was the dead of night. Dyna and Anscomb were asleep curled up together. Ursa shook her head. 

 

“It’s not your fault. I didn’t exactly try to get away,” she said warmly. He was lying back nearly behind his desk and he smiled at her tone. 

 

She leaned over him, pausing slightly above him to ask, “I didn’t even think...do you still want this? Last I saw you we had a rather intimate discussion followed by mountains of work. I shouldn’t have presumed…”

 

He pulled her down without letting her finish. He wished to drink her in, bathe in her scent and sounds. He’d missed her when she was gone. Even on days when the pain was small he’d felt an ache with her so far away. He’d worried for her too but mostly he’d just wished she’d come home so he could hold her again. To have her in his arms was a gift. He kissed her soundly before releasing the back of her neck, tracing his fingers over her skin. She blushed and giggled.

 

“Well I suppose that answers that,” she said shyly. 

 

“You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” he told her honestly. “Your heart is your gift, not Dyna or that mark. If I’d seen you in a crowded bar I would’ve wanted you. If the world were different, I fear I’d miss you even if we’d never met. You didn’t presume anything. I want this.”

 

He stroked along the scar on her forehead, watching with interest as the red flush around it made it more stark. 

 

“What is this from?” he asked tenderly. 

 

“Table. When I was a kid,” she replied. He pulled her head down and kissed it softly. 

 

“I’ve wanted to do that for longer than I should say,” he said. 

 

She laughed, shaking her head. “You’re wonderful. And I should leave before I do something I’ll regret later.” 

 

Cullen’s mind filled with thoughts of what they could do but she was right. They’d only just seen each other again. They needed time. They had yet to discuss the future. Their dragons had bonded but until they mated, nothing was set in stone. The world was balancing on the tip of a blade. He wanted her, but he could wait. Cullen let go of her waist and watched her stand. 

 

“Leave Dyna here,” he said, eyes trailing to the sleeping dragons, “I’ll send her to you in the morning.” 

 

Ursa smiled. She had sleep in her eyes and a crease on her cheek from lying back on his shirt and she was the most beautiful creature he’d ever seen. 

 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Cullen,” she said before slipping out the door. 

 

____

 

AT breakfast Dorian and Ursa took each other in. Ursa broke into a grin and Dorian looked sheepish.

 

“You scoundrel,” she teased, pushing him down onto the bench, “Tell me everything.” 

 

“Only if you tell me what happened with our dear commander last night. Sera says you didn’t go back to your room. Red Jenny was up all night and she reported you got back very early this morning, still in your clothes from traveling,” Dorian replied. 

 

Ursa sat. “I’m sure it wasn’t as entertaining as your night, but fine. We just fell asleep together. Dyna and Anscomb bonded and we couldn’t bear to separate them. Other than that and a little PG kissing, I’m afraid it wasn’t very exciting,” she said. 

 

“Well I doubt that but yes. My night was a bit more...wild. Let’s just say they don’t call them the Chargers for nothing,” Dorian laughed.

 

Ursa giggled with him, oblivious to the others watching her. 

 

“This could be terrible for our image. Our leader with our Commander? All the Glory needs is a small piece of information and she’s become discredited. A young woman in love, how could she be expected to make logical choices if her lover is one of her council members?” Josephine said. 

 

“You can’t tell them they can’t see each other,” Leliana said. 

 

“I know. I don’t wish to. I just need a way to spin it. There’s no hiding it. Not from the way they look at each other,” Josephine said.

 

“Let them wear it proudly. Like a badge. Don’t deny it, use it. Affection can make any leader seem more human. The people love her, how could they not love a beautiful man by her side?” Cassandra offered.

 

“It’s just smug,” Josephine said doubtfully. “A beautiful woman with a beautiful man, running what is becoming the most powerful political sect in our country. It will seem as if we’re bragging.” 

 

“No, those who know of Cullen know of at least some of his past,” Leliana said, “If we use that angle we could play it up.”

 

“And make it seem like she chose him out of sympathy?” Cassandra said in disgust, “No. That isn’t fair to either of them.”

 

“No matter what we do, we’d better do it fast,” Josephine said, “We won’t be able to keep it a secret much longer.” 

 

The two other women nodded, turning back to other topics but keeping this predicament in mind. 

 

____

 

THERE were bigger fish to fry than Ursa’s relationship with the Commander. Red Jenny and the other spies had found out some information about the dragon that had destroyed Haven and none of it was reassuring. 

 

“His name is Corypheus. He was one of the original dragons to crawl from the Fade when they reopened it over 150 years ago,” Leliana explained.

 

Ursa leaned forward in her chair, her elbows resting on her knees. “So he’s old. And powerful.”

 

“And ambitious,” Leliana added. “When he was part of the feral sect in Dumat he preached an end to tolerance.  He wasn’t a very strong dragon then. Memories of him show him as a somewhat average dragon. Nothing of note. But then the templars came for his people and Dumat lost many of its strongest members and allies. He became cold, calculating. He took power from the Fade without thinking of the cost.”

 

**“Corypheus? He knew my father. My father was a hatchling in Dumat. They left before the hunt came for them. Moved to the hills of Kirkwall. But before they did my father trained beneath him. He was a bit...unhinged even then** **_,”_ ** Dyna said, recalling a memory from her time in her egg. 

 

“Is your father still alive?” Josephine asked. 

 

Dyna blew out a green ball of energy. “ **Probably. He fled Kirkwall when he killed my mother. I was still in my egg then. If he made it back to his clan he’s probably fine.”**

 

The bitterness in her words couldn’t be misconstrued. Usually, a dragonling spent time with their mother after their first year with their soul bound human. It was meant to remind them of the family they came from and to strengthen their ties to their Rage and Glory. It had been nearly a year for Dyna. She was of age to bond and to mate. Normally, she’d see her mother before choosing her mate but her mother was gone. Only the echo of memories were left. She had no mother to speak with about Anscomb or Ursa. She had no mother with the wisdom of ages. Her mother’s human partner had first gone insane when the dragon was murdered and then become Tranquil. She lived far away in America, in a home for riders who no longer had their dragons. There was no one for Dyna to turn to. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Josephine said softly, “I can’t imagine how that feels. Melly spent a month with her mother when she came of age.”

 

**“He did what he did. I can’t change the past. He wouldn’t tell us anything, anyway. He was born of his sect and he stayed true through his life. His memories are...potent. He will stand with his sect, even if he doesn’t like Corypheus much,”** Dyna replied. 

 

“So he won’t be swayed. What about the rest of the feral clans? They can’t all think he’s right,” Cullen said. 

 

“I’m not sure they do but none are willing to stand against him. Not after the Conclave. What confuses me is if they didn’t kill Justinia and the rest, who did? I find it hard to believe that the Glory could hatch such a plot and Corypheus himself wasn’t invited, so how did he get in? There were guards who would have raised an alarm if anyone they didn’t know tried to enter,” Cassandra said. 

 

“So we’re looking for a group that was invited to the Conclave that had a chance and a reason to hurt Justinia and the peace talks,” Leliana said, jotting down notes. 

 

Ursa groaned. She leaned her head into her hands, bouncing her knees. 

 

“Are you alright?” Cullen asked quietly. He leaned over her chair, concern written on his face. The others watched curiously as she turned to look at him.

 

“I’m fine,” she said with a wane smile, “Just tired.” 

 

He placed his hand on her shoulder. “We can take a break,” he offered. She shook her head before he finished speaking. 

 

“No, it’s okay. We need to discuss this. Thank you, though,” she touched his hand gently, a moment of tenderness passing between them. 

 

Josephine looked at Leliana who nodded.

 

“There is another issue,” Leliana started slowly. 

 

“Is it worse than Corypheus?” Ursa asked dryly. 

 

“It might be to you,” Josephine said, regret etched on her face. 

 

“What is it?” Ursa asked, her brow furrowing. 

 

“Your...relationship,” Josephine said delicately. 

 

“My what?” Ursa asked. Cullen’s hand dropped from her shoulder. She looked up at him once more. “You mean this relationship?” 

 

“Are you having another one we don’t know about?” Cassandra deadpanned. Ursa paused, then chuckled dryly. 

 

“That was a joke, I hope. No. No other one. But...why do we need to discuss it? We’re careful. We don’t show it in public. It’s our business,” Ursa said firmly. She looked back at Cullen who was watching her, vulnerability in his eyes. She wanted to pull him from the room. She wanted to promise him that their relationship wouldn’t change even if their friends disapproved. Instead she settled for taking his hand firmly and placing it back on her shoulder. 

 

“You aren’t...subtle,” Josephine said. “Everyone can see it. It’s spread through Skyhold already. If it gets to the Glory…”

 

“Who cares?” Ursa snapped, causing Josephine to step back. “Why should it matter that I care for someone? Let them hear about it. Let them use it. As you’ve just pointed out, we have bigger things to deal with.”

 

“Ursa,” Cullen soothed, “It’s alright. They’re right. We need to discuss it. There should be a plan. It is our business but you’re the head of a revolution with more influence than the Glory at this point. It’s a fair conversation.” 

 

She slumped back in her seat, rubbing her forehead. “Sorry, Josie,” she mumbled, “I’m just…”

 

Josephine nodded sympathetically. “Of course. There is no course of action we can think of that doesn’t make us look weak. I simply wish to put the thought in your mind. Perhaps you’ll come up with a plan that we haven’t thought of. I don’t wish to take this from you. Either of you. It’s...well it’s lovely to see you both happy.” 

 

Cullen looked away while Ursa blushed. Cassandra cleared her throat. “Can we get back to Corypheus?” 

 

“Yes. He has followers now. Many, if what we’ve heard is to be believed. We’ve heard a tip that there’s one in the country court. Princess Celene has been threatened and we believe it is tied to Corypheus. With the Glory losing support every day the country has been forced to either stand with them or fall. To kill the princess and to blame it on the Glory...the world of humans doesn’t know the difference between feral and unbound. If a dragon kills her it would drive a wedge between the government and the Glory. With the Glory blamed, they could fall and no one would care. Not until it was too late,” Leliana said. 

 

“So we protect the princess. If she’s alive, there’s no break between the Glory and the country which means Corypheus doesn’t get a fractured country, right?” Ursa said. 

 

“Exactly. There’s a cousin of hers fighting for her spot. When her mother dies she’ll inherit the throne. We all know what that’s worth nowadays but it does include some political power and some beautiful palaces. Mostly what it entails is recognition. The cousin, Gaspard, lives in France. He’s contacted us and invited us to Celene’s ball at the winter palace.  _ All  _ of us. He’ll escort the Inquisitor, of course, but from there we’ll be free to look around. My sources say that any attack on Celene will happen there. Corypheus wants a splash and this ball is meant to remind both the humans and riders of the country of our strength as a nation. If he kills her during a party meant to symbolize our strength...he’ll undermine all of the country’s efforts to link rider and human once more. All political figureheads will be there as well. This could be a good chance for us to gain even more influence as well as protect the princess,” Leliana explained. 

 

“When is the ball?” Ursa asked. She’d had plans to go out to the sea once more before another long trek into the rural areas of the country. She’d come to enjoy her times out, finding peace in the quiet of the trees and the songs of the birds. 

 

“It’s in a month. We have time to plan. I know you hoped to go back out soon. We can arrange it,” Josephine said. 

 

“Must we all go?” Cassandra asked. 

 

“Yes,” Cullen, Josephine, Leliana, and Ursa said in tandem. Cassandra groaned. 

 

____

 

“THEY want some kind of plan for how to announce  _ my  _ relationship!” Ursa ranted to Dorian. 

 

“You are the head of the most important political power of our time,” Dorian reasoned. He pet Audri’s head so the dragon purred. 

 

“So what? What should that matter?” she snapped in frustration. 

 

“You do know nobles still practice arranged marriages? There’s a reason for it. You’re supposed to be with someone powerful, someone who can give something to the Inquisition. You not doing that opens you up to ridicule. The Glory wants to hurt you so they’ll go after him. They’ll push his past and insecurities into the public eye so he’ll seem weak. You’ll look foolish. They’ll show all those videos of you fighting and twist them. They’ll play it up that you’re a woman. You’re gorgeous so they’ll make you look stupid. A smart  _ and  _ beautiful woman would be too much so they’ll want you to look like a ditz. They’ll try to say your heart is leading us, not your head. Josie’s only looking out for you. You do need a plan if you want to keep your relationship as private as possible,” Dorian explained.

 

They were in his small room above the library and Ursa slammed her back into her chair. “I hate when you make sense,” she said petulantly. 

 

“I’m about to make more sense, so hold on to that boiling hatred,” Dorian said cheerfully. 

 

“Oh?” Ursa said, arching her eyebrow upward. 

 

“Yes. I have a plan. One they might not have thought of. They’re thinking of ways to downplay your relationship. They’re not thinking about highlighting it. You two are disgustingly cute, it’s literally sickening. Like Josie keeps saying, anyone who looks at you two can see it. So don’t let them get to you first. You take the upper hand by announcing on your own. But not in the formulated way Josie’s thinking of. There are literally hundreds of videos posted from Skyhold. Some are just little things like the recruits playing tricks on each other. Others are bigger. Videos of you practicing combat on Dyna. Old Vines of you with the council with music in the background. The country wants to know you. They like to see the candid moments, not the newsreels we know the outlets edit until it isn’t even the same footage anymore. Use that. Show the world, without a plan, what your relationship is. Stop hiding in the shadows of Skyhold. Let them all see it. Let the world see you unashamed and in love. Don’t apologize for it, own it. It’s a strength. The Inquisitor is a person. A powerful, beautiful, nearly inhuman person, but a person.”

 

Ursa stared at Dorian. “That’s...actually brilliant. Won’t they still go after us?” 

 

“Oh obviously,” Dorian tsked, “But you’ll be above it. You make your move first, anything they do after that will seem petty. They might say you’re emotional but so what? You’re in love and yet you still manage to close rifts and stop what’s left of the Blood Brothers from killing more people. If they call you vain for being with a gorgeous man, post pictures of you out in the field. You’re not nearly so put together then. I have some things I’ve recorded of some of our fights. I haven’t posted them because I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to, but I can. Stop being gun shy. Show them you are who you are and that you don’t care what they think.” 

 

Ursa chewed on her lip as she thought it over. She’d changed so much since the day of the Conclave. She no longer worried when people looked at her. She had no problem walking into the rooms full of people, her hand glowing green. She could hunt, fight, protect herself. She was stronger than she’d ever been. Dorian wasn’t wrong. She didn’t care what anyone thought. She wondered when that had happened. 

 

“Okay,” she nodded, “Post what you have. We’ll find a way to get my relationship out there.”

 

“I have an idea for that too,” Dorian started. Ursa leaned in to listen. 

 

____

 

CULLEN had never been to Ursa’s room. He’d never had a reason to. When she’d asked him to meet her there he’d nervously accepted. Anscomb was out flying with Dyna, taking a much needed break, and he’d ordered Cullen to do the same. He was on his way when he bumped into Josephine and Leliana. 

 

“Have you seen the Inquisitor?” Josephine asked. 

 

“I’m on my way to right now,” he said, gesturing towards her door. Both women paused. 

 

“I am happy for you both, you know,” Josephine said, “It’s just...we need a plan.” 

 

“I understand,” Cullen said. He couldn’t tell Josephine how terrifying it was to him. He’d only just found Ursa. If they opened their relationship to criticism, he feared he’d lose her. He’d done things he regretted. Many things. He didn’t want the Glory to be the one to tell her of them. 

 

“It’s wonderful, truly,” Josephine said with more insistence. 

 

“I understand,” he said again. She nodded. 

 

“We’ll speak with her later,” Leliana said, pulling on Josephine’s arm. Josephine nodded, following her friend back to her office. Cullen shook his head and continued on.

 

The old castle was coming along in renovations. When they’d first entered it had been falling apart. Ursa’s room, a large tower bedroom that overlooked the mountains, had been in ruins. For her first 4 weeks she hadn’t been able to climb the stairs to it which had given Josephine time to decorate it. He’d heard her complain it was too much but Josephine wouldn't hear of it. The leader of a revolution deserved an opulent room, she’d said. Cullen was inclined to agree. 

 

Cullen didn’t bother knocking, she wouldn’t hear it. He climbed the stairs slowly, listening to the activity from above. 

 

Ursa was humming, her laptop open and playing old pop music. Cullen smiled to himself at the sound. Papers rustled and she sighed. As he came to the top stair, he studied the room. It was large and spacious. A dragon sized king bed sat in the center of the room. It was large enough for two full grown riders and their dragons, making it the focal point of the room. Above the bed was a small loft space. He could make out crumpled shirts and dresses hung haphazardly on hangers. Across the room was a desk where Ursa sat. She had her hair free and had clearly just washed it. It was wet, leaving a dark spot on her sweatshirt. She was biting her lip as she looked between the papers on her desk and her laptop. The room smelled of soap and clean woman, causing Cullen to inhale deeply before clearing his throat. 

 

Ursa looked up, her face melting to softness when she saw him. He savored the smile she gave him. 

 

“Cullen!” she said warmly. 

 

“I managed to finish my own reports,” he said, nodding to her work as he crossed the room. 

 

“Lucky,” she groaned. “Leliana wants more notes on rift activity out in the country. Like I’m the one to give it to her. I go out, I close rifts, I kill things. It’s not very in depth stuff. If she wanted to science of it she should’ve asked Solas.” 

 

He had his hands in the pockets of his jeans, aware of her eyes on him in the intimacy of her bedroom.

 

“Would you like help?” he offered. 

 

She tsked. “No, thank you. I can do it. I just need to take a break. My wrists hurt from typing and the words are blurring. Don’t let anyone tell you being the head of a revolution is exciting all the time. It’s a lot of paperwork. Come here.”

 

She gestured for him, her smile sweet. He crossed the room, stopping beside her chair. She turned, placing her hands on his hips and smiling up at him. “Hi,” she said. 

 

“Hi,” he replied. 

 

“Is it weird to say I missed you?” she asked, her nose crinkling with the question. 

 

He reached out, running his fingers through her hair where it fell over her left shoulder. “No,” he denied, “I missed you too.” 

 

“Good,” she said. “Now I hate to say it, but I didn’t ask you to come here just to tell you that. Dorian had a plan about announcing our relationship and I wanted to run it by you before we do it.” 

 

Cullen sighed. 

 

“I know,” she agreed, “But they’re not wrong. We have to do something. Come on, the bed’s more comfortable. I’ve been meaning to ask Josie about getting a couch up here…” 

 

They moved to sit on the bed, Cullen stiffly perched on the edge while Ursa sat cross legged in her sweatpants and sweatshirt. 

 

“So, Dorian thinks we should get ahead of it organically. There’s a lot of stuff out there about all of us already. Videos of you training the recruits, ones of me flying, that kind of thing. He thinks we should post one of us first. Show who we are without planning it. I think he’s right. The best way to deal with it without downplaying it is to let us just be us. What do you think?” she looked at him earnestly. 

 

“It could work, but how would we not plan it?” he asked. 

 

“Dorian gets shots of things I wouldn’t even had known he had his phone for. I told him to look for something, anything. Once he finds it, he’ll post it. I know we didn’t really want everyone to know yet but...I think we have to,” she said, making a face of distaste. 

 

Cullen touched her thigh gently. “It’s alright,” he said. 

 

“I’m not ashamed, you know. I couldn’t be. I just...I wasn’t upset because of that. You know that, right?” she said, faltering. 

 

Cullen looked into her face. The tattoo on her face had become just another part of her skin to him. He’d nearly forgotten what it meant. The Dalish didn’t mingle with others. They would force shame upon those who did. She’d grown up the product of such a union. He hadn’t even thought of it. She’d been taught to be ashamed of her attractions to those outside of her own people. He cupped his hands around her cheeks so she was forced to look into his eyes. 

 

“I know that. I only...I have things I wish to share with you in time that I fear they’ll try to use against me. I don’t want to put you in that line of fire,” he said. 

 

Her lips turned upward. “Okay.” She looked back at her desk and sighed deeply. “I had hoped I’d be done by now. I can’t really…”

 

“You have work to do,” he said, understanding. “It’s fine. I’ll leave you to it.” 

 

She caught his hand as he went to stand. “Thank you. You’re just,” she blushed before continuing, “You’re too distracting. If you stayed I’d never end up doing it.” 

 

He chuckled, bending down to press a kiss to her forehead. “I understand. I’d never get my work done if you were there, either.” 

 

She made a small sound of protest before pulling on his hand so he was forced to bend down again. “Kiss me for real,” she ordered. 

 

He smiled and complied. He’d kissed her many times now but it never seemed like enough. Her lips were soft and they opened to him easily. Her tongue was sweet, tasting like the wine they’d had at dinner. Her left hand came to rest on his neck as she tilted her head for a better angle. 

 

_ “Dragon’s talons, she’ll be the end of me,”  _ he thought, huffing when Anscomb laughed. 

 

He lost track of time when he kissed her. Her fingers were in his hair, his hands cupping her face. It could have been a decade and he wouldn’t have regretted a moment. When he finally pulled away her pupils were wide and dark, her mouth rosy. She licked her lips, driving him crazy in a single move. She smiled slowly. 

 

“Definitely distracting,” she said. 

 

**_“Take her to the sea. Tomorrow. It’s only a day trip. You can both sacrifice that. Dyna and I will come. Take a break for a moment. Give her the gift you’ve been meaning to give her,”_ ** Anscomb said. 

 

Cullen pondered the thought. He’d been meaning to give her his lucky coin for weeks but he’d never been able to find the right time. Anscomb was right. They could take one day away from the Inquisition. 

 

“Clear your schedule tomorrow. I want to take you somewhere,” he said. 

 

Ursa looked surprised but nodded. “Okay,” she said. “Do I get to know where we’re going?” 

 

‘No,” he said with a grin, “It’s a surprise.” 

 

Ursa laughed. “Alright then. Tomorrow, Commander.” 

 

Cullen kissed the side of her head one last time before heading down the stairs feeling lighter than he had in days. 

 


	8. 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa wears a pretty dress. Cullen and Ursa go on a date. Sera is suspicious of Vivienne. Ursa and Cullen's relationship is announced. They go to the ball and save Celene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case it isn't obvious, I really wanted this story to be about the moments we don't see. The pieces between characters that games can't give us as much of. The big plot points we all already know so I focus more on the people before and after those moments. I hope you're enjoying it as much as I enjoy writing it!

Chapter 8

 

SERA covered her mouth with her hand, hoping not to be heard. She’d gone with Vivienne to deal with a small matter of security but it had turned out to be more than that. Aleda and Vivienne had been attacked upon entry to the Glory embassy, causing Sera to hide in the nearest office. She’d heard Vivienne fall with a scream and now she waited, hoping the woman was still breathing and that whatever had knocked her down wouldn’t find Sera. Red Jenny was curled in her collar, her mind an array of blues, showing her panic.

 

**_“Someone set her up,”_ ** Red Jenny said.

 

“ _ And we might die for it,”  _ Sera replied.  

 

**_“No. Aleda is alive. She’s not screaming so Vivienne must be alive, too. Give them time. We’ll be okay,”_ ** Red Jenny said soothingly.

 

_ “This was supposed to be easy. An easy job to help out. That’s it. I don’t do what Ursa does. I could never do that. I do this. Sneaky sneaky. I’m  _ **_not_ ** _ going to die for that,”  _ Sera said fervently. 

 

Red Jenny hushed her, peeking her small head out of Sera’s shirt. The door opened slowly. Sera gripped the handle of the pistol Cullen had given her. She’d never thought she’d have to use it. Her hands shook as Sera stared at the person in the doorway.

 

“Don’t shoot, my dear. It’s just me,” Vivienne said. She had blood on her blouse and she smelled like smoke. 

 

“I might just do it anyway. Stupid bureaucrats. What the  _ fuck _ ?” Sera snapped. She dropped the gun to her side and scrambled to her feet. 

 

“I am sorry. There was a slim chance that the leak was...an aggressor. I didn’t think it would be quite so intense,” Vivienne said. 

 

“So you brought me?” Sera asked incredulously. 

 

“You’re good in a pinch and if it had been what I’d assumed, your expertise would’ve been needed. You see, there are those inside the Glory and in other Glories that are working for Corypheus. When I heard that there was someone within my own offices handing information back I figured we could handle it. No need to bother the Inquisitor,” Vivienne said with a shrug. 

 

Sera squinted at her. “Bother her next time,” she said in a huff. She didn’t believe the woman’s story, not fully, but she wasn’t willing to fight about it. 

 

“Don’t worry, my dear, I’ll explain it all when the time comes. Let’s go home,” Vivienne said. Sera grumbled but followed the woman, already plotting to tell Ursa what had happened. 

 

____

 

“THE Inquisitor took the day off,” Josephine said without looking up from the reports on her desk. Sera huffed. 

 

“She took a day off? How can she take a day off?” Sera nearly shrieked. 

 

She couldn’t put together the pieces. Vivienne asking her and no one else. The attack in the offices. Vivienne saying that she needed help from someone with Sera’s expertise. None of it made sense. She needed Ursa to help her. 

 

“The Commander took her out for the day,” Josephine said. 

 

“He...don’t they both have jobs?” Sera asked. 

 

Josephine looked up. “Is this something important?” she asked.

 

“Yes. No. I don’t know,” Sera said in frustration. 

 

“You could tell me,” Josephine said, sounding concerned for the first time since the conversation began.

 

“I don’t want to ruffle feathers,” Sera muttered.

 

Josephine snorted. “Since when? You’ve been defacing reports since you’ve arrived. You drink us out of beer by the cask and you’re not exactly quiet about your feelings on the politicians we invite.”

 

“I don’t want to ruffle these feathers,” Sera amended. 

 

“Very well. The Inquisitor should be back tonight,” Josephine said. 

 

Sera sighed heavily. 

 

“Is this a life or death situation?” Josephine asked. 

 

Sera thought of the bodies she’d stepped over to leave the offices. “Not anymore I don’t think,” she said. 

 

“Then I’m afraid all I can say is she’ll be back tomorrow,” Josephin said. 

 

Sera gave a shriek and stomped from the room, leaving Josephine to chuckle at her back. 

 

_____

 

CULLEN had asked for the convertible. Winter was melting into spring and the air was finally warm enough to stand outside in the breeze. With the dragons flying above them they were free to take a human only car. Ursa had squealed when she’d seen it, a baby blue Ford that looked like it could fly. Her joy had been more addicting than any blood ever could be.  

 

“Can I drive?” Ursa asked, bouncing on her toes. 

 

He handed her the keys, watching her wiggle in her excitement. 

 

“You have to direct me,” she said when they’d climbed into the car. So he did. 

 

He didn’t take her to oceans she’d seen. He took her to the bluffs by his family’s old home. They’d since moved to a place farther in the country but he had his fondest memories here. Despite the nightmares of the night before, he smiled as they neared it. 

 

She’d played music the whole drive, singing to pop songs and telling Cullen stories of dancing at the Keep parties.

 

“I love to dance,” she confessed, “Just not the kind they make us do at those stupid parties. I used to practice with Dorian.”

 

“You have a nice voice too. Why stay in a Keep?” he asked. 

 

She shrugged, a content smile on her face. “Why ruin something I love?” 

 

“Would it ruin it to try and pursue it?” he contemplated. 

 

“Maybe not, but probably. Everything else I loved and tried to do got ruined. So I just...enjoy it,” she shrugged. She didn’t seem upset by the thought but it made Cullen’s heart ache for her. He knew what it felt like to have something he loved tainted. “Besides,” she continued, “I’m not that good. Just okay.”

 

“I think you’re wonderful,” he said fervently. 

 

She laughed, a clear sound free of worry. “I think you might be a little biased,” she said. 

 

He looked at her profile. In the driver’s seat of a blue convertible, hair flying behind her, top down, a loose, grey, sweater slipping down her right shoulder, she was the most perfect thing he’d ever seen. 

 

“Maybe a little,” he agreed. 

 

____

 

URSA couldn’t believe her eyes when she pulled into the parking lot. Just a few feet from them was a ledge with a railing and over that were the bluffs. She’d been to the bluffs at the Storm Coast but none of them looked like this. In the morning light the water shimmered. She felt the smile spread across her face. 

 

“Cullen,” she breathed, “This is beautiful.” 

 

“I grew up around here,” he said. 

 

She turned to look at him, her interest peaked. “Really?” 

 

He pointed. “Right across there. Our porch faced the water. We used to come out here when I was young. My brother liked to watch the sunset.”

 

“Did you ever bring a girl here?” Ursa asked teasingly. She leaned back against the railing so the sun haloed her head. 

 

Cullen laughed. “I could hardly get a girl to speak with me let alone come to the bluffs with me.”

 

Ursa looked him over. He was leaning into his right hip, hands in his faded jeans pockets. His black T-shirt hugged him in the right places and his hair ruffled with the breeze. She rolled her eyes. 

 

“Yeah right,” she said. 

 

He walked towards her, bracketing her against the railing. She grinned up at him and he felt his heart hammer in his chest. He was still tentative when he touched her, unsure if she was alright with the contact. She seemed more than okay with it though, her hands settling on his arms. 

 

“I bet you had girls swooning. I bet they all tripped over themselves to come here with you. You were in the Kirkwall Keep your first years, right? I bet they all fell all over you when you got to leave. Begged you to drive them here,” she teased. 

 

He chuckled. “Not at all. Besides, I drove a motorcycle when I was here. It’s not the most conducive to the activities that go on up here at night.” 

 

Her eyebrow raised, lips quirking in a half smirk. “A motorcyle? I wouldn’t have pegged you for that. Do you still have one? Can I see it?”

 

Cullen leaned in, his nose brushing hers. “No, but I’ll get one if you like.” 

 

Ursa nodded slowly, eyes locked on his. She watched his pupils dilate, her lips parted. “Then you could take me here and we’ll see how well a bike works for those...activities.” 

 

She pushed herself up on her toes as she spoke, her lips brushing his. When she finished speaking he growled lightly and pressed his mouth to hers. 

 

He’d meant to be gentle with her today. To take his time and get to know her more but she seemed to have her own agenda. She rose onto her toes fully, wrapping her arms around his neck and deepening the kiss. His hands fell to the small of her back, fingers tracing along the curve of her ass. She pushed herself closer, fingers twisting in his hair. He wanted to drown in her. She stilled his mind like nothing else. The nightmares he’d suffered the night before were nothing when she pressed herself against him. It was as if she knew her affect. When she pulled her mouth from his she didn’t back away. Instead, she wrapped her arms around him tightly and hugged. He buried his face in the curve of her neck and inhaled deeply. They stayed there, locked together, for a long minute. He sighed, feeling the tension leave his shoulders before pulling back. She blushed, running her fingers through her hair and looking back over the water. 

 

“So...you brought lunch?” she said. 

 

He smiled at the red crawling up her neck and filling her cheeks. Leaning in, he pressed a kiss to her neck. 

 

“I’ll get it,” he said, leaving her to look out over the water once more.

 

_ “Dyna...what do I do?”  _ Ursa called out to her dragon. Dyna and Anscomb had flown down to the water and were diving in between the rocks. 

 

**_“What’s wrong?”_ ** Dyna asked. She’d been paying attention to Anscomb and was quick to assess Ursa’s feelings. 

 

_ “It’s too much,”  _ Ursa said. 

 

**_“It’s not. Breathe. Enjoy the day. You don’t get to just be a young woman anymore. Take the opportunity,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

“ _ He’s perfect. Beautiful. I…”  _ Ursa couldn’t finish the thought. She blushed furiously even just thinking of it. 

 

**_“You love him,”_ ** Dyna said frankly. Ursa looked over her shoulder. Cullen was walking back towards her, a basket on his arm. She nodded, knowing Dyna would feel it. 

 

“ **_So enjoy it. You don’t have to say it yet. You can just be happy to be with him. We leave again in two days. Don’t worry about it. Relax. Eat. Kiss him some more. Talk about your lives before this. Just be two young people in a relationship for one day. You’re on a date, just enjoy it,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

_ “...okay,”  _ Ursa said, “ _ Okay.”  _

 

“I had Josephine pack all your favorites. I think she went a bit overboard,” Cullen said as he approached. He looked dubiously at the basket he was holding. Ursa laughed.

 

“Doesn’t she always?” 

 

Cullen nodded and gestured to a bench overlooking the water. Ursa followed him over. They sat in a peaceful quiet for a few minutes. 

 

“Does your family know what you’re doing now?” she asked him after the pause. 

 

Cullen sighed. “My sister has always been good at tracking me down but no. I don’t tell them. They were worried enough when I trained as a templar. I couldn’t…” 

 

“They would be proud of you,” Ursa said, no doubt in her mind. Cullen scoffed. 

 

“Why? I’ve hurt people. Killed them for what I was told was right. They shouldn’t be proud of that.”

 

“Cullen…” Ursa said his name softly, as if it were something to treasure. He turned to look at her. “They’d be proud of you.” 

 

He didn’t know how to respond when she looked at him like that. 

 

_ “How do I tell her she’s the only one who makes me feel like that could be true?”  _ he asked himself. Anscomb answered. 

 

**_“You don’t need to say it. You’re showing her now. Give her the gift.”_ **

 

Ursa startled him by putting the basket on the ground and lying across the table. She smiled as the sun splashed across her face. Tucking her glowing hand beneath her head, she hummed. “I miss this,” she said. 

 

“What?” he asked.

 

“Just...lazy days. I had a lot of them in the Keep. Though I didn’t go outside much. That’s something I do like about this. I get to travel more. I mean, usually I’m running into danger while I’m out there but there are good moments. I love the sun. But this...it’s the best of both worlds. When Dorian would visit we would always find time to go sit on the roof and drink. It became this tradition. He was always busy and I was always lonely so it worked for us. To take a break like that. Sometimes Sera came but she had her own group. They called themselves the friends of Red Jenny,” Ursa’s lips curved at the memories. “I used to be so jealous of the people she knew just because of Red Jenny.” 

 

“You know more people now,” Cullen reasoned. She laughed. 

 

“That’s certainly true. It’s funny, our group is probably the oddest I’ve ever seen. A dragon professor, a diplomat, a spy, a commander, a seeker, and me. We must look silly to people outside of the Inquisition,” she said, her head rolling so she could look at him. 

 

“Probably,” he agreed. She stretched, humming into a yawn. 

 

“Thanks for doing this. I never would’ve taken a day off if you hadn’t suggested it. I think I needed it. You probably do to. If anyone works as much as I do, it’s you,” she said. 

 

“Mostly paperwork and training for me,” he replied.

 

“Still work,” she stated. 

 

He let his own yawn overtake him. She peeked out of her right eye at him. “We have the day, right?” she asked. 

 

“Yes,” he said. He’d told Josephine they’d be back that night. He hadn’t specified when. 

 

“Good. I’m taking a nap,” she said, “Wake me when it's lunch time.” 

 

She curled onto her side, her arm under her head as below them, their dragons played.

 

____

 

**_“Will they ever tell one another?”_ ** Anscomb mused.

 

**_“Give them more time. Humans don’t see the paths as we do. They can’t know what we know,”_ ** Dyna said in amusement.

 

**_“That the moment they kissed they’d sealed their fates?”_ ** Anscomb asked, splashing Dyna with his tail. 

 

“ **_Exactly,”_ ** Dyna replied, shaking the water from her face. 

 

**_“We’ll just have to wait then, won’t we?”_ ** he said.

 

“ **_Yes. And when this is done, we’ll all be together,”_ ** Dyna said warmly, green the color of grass passing to Anscomb’s mind. He snorted water at her in response. She hissed and dove back into the foaming tide, enjoying the moment. 

 

____

 

“UGH,” Ursa groaned. Cullen looked over at her. She was leaning back into Dyna with her hand on her stomach. “I’m so full and I don’t want to go back. Can’t we play hooky for one more day?” 

 

He laughed at her whining. “I wish, but I think Cassandra would send out a hunting party to find us if we were gone another day.” 

 

“You’re right,” she moaned, “But dammit, I just want to sit here. With you.”

 

The water below them splashed on the rocks. The sun had set and around them was the whisper of the wind. It was peaceful. It was the perfect time. Cullen fumbled in his pocket. 

 

“When I joined the order I came out here with my brother,” he started, “And he gave me this coin. It was just what he had in his pocket at the moment but he told me it would bring me luck. I’ve held onto it ever since. I’ve survived more things than any one person has a right to. I’ve met you. I like to believe it is lucky. And, well, it’s time for it to give luck to someone else. I’d like you to have it. I know it’s small, but…” he trailed off, rubbing the back of his neck. Ursa looked down at the coin in his hand. She reached out for it, pausing midway. 

 

“Don’t you need it?” she asked softly.

 

“I think I’m lucky enough as it is,” he replied just as quietly. 

 

She looked up, placing her hand over his. “A little luck never hurt anyone,” she said. 

 

Gently he flipped her hand so the coin rested in her palm. He closed her fingers over it. She smiled first at their hands and then up at him.

 

“I would miss you too,” she said. He cocked his head, confused at the words. “If I’d never met you. If the world was different. I’d miss you too,” she clarified, recalling what he’d said to her the morning she’d woken up in his arms. 

 

He couldn’t help the emotion that slid across his face. He knew it would probably tell her without words how he felt. He didn’t care. He pressed his forehead to hers, closing his eyes. 

 

“Andraste preserve us,” he said fervently. 

 

Her hands came to his cheeks, sliding down to his neck softly. She nudged his face gently with her own until his lips found hers. This kiss was soft. It felt more intimate than any they’d shared before. She didn’t open her mouth, instead pressing gentle kisses across his cheek and down his neck until her head rested on his shoulder. They stayed there until they could ignore the time no longer. They packed the car in comfortable silence. When Cullen began to drive he placed his hand on her thigh. She intertwined their fingers, a small smile on her face. They’d had one day away from the world and they had made the best of it. 

 

____

 

SERA was waiting when Ursa returned. It was nearly morning by the time Ursa closed her bedroom door, sighing as she sagged against it.

 

“Glad you had fun but I have some news,” Sera said, causing Ursa to jump. 

 

“Oh my god, Sera! Don’t do that!” Ursa yelped, her hand flying to her chest. 

 

“I wouldn’t have to if you had been here,” Sera retorted.

 

“Did the world fall apart again? Is there another hole in the sky? Did Corypheus attack again?” Ursa asked sarcastically. Already the comfort and relaxation of her day with Cullen was being pulled from her. 

 

“Vivienne asked for a favor,” Sera said, ignoring the snark. “So I went. Be nice to the powerful ally, it will make Ursa happy, I thought. Well it turned out to be more. An embassy on the far side of the country. She said she needed me for listening and locks but when we got there we were attacked. Brutally. I thought she’d died. She played it off, said someone in the building was handing secrets to Corypheus and she’d thought it would just be gathering information but I don’t buy it. I don’t know why she asked me to go but it seems improbable that she actually wanted my help. Why was I there? And why didn’t she want to bother you?” 

 

Ursa groaned. “Great. It actually is something. Time to wake up the troops.”

 

“Is it really worth it?” Sera asked, her expression pained.

 

“Why don’t you want them to know?” Ursa asked.

 

Sera shrugged.

 

“Sera,” Ursa prompted.

 

“I knew something was wrong but I said yes. I knew she wouldn’t have asked me because I’m not important enough. I know I’m a joke to them,” Sera said.

 

“You aren’t a joke to me,” Ursa denied.

 

Sera laughed dryly. “I didn’t used to be. Look at you now. Bigger than your britches. No time for us little people. You run this place and make decisions as if you’re made of steel. You’re not the woman you used to be. Larger than life now, aren’t cha?”

 

“I have time for you. Come on. We have to wake the others. And Vivienne. We need to know why this happened and why Vivienne hid it,” Ursa said. “And I’m not larger than life. I’m still me.” 

 

Sera felt a rush of relief at the words. She got up and followed on her friend’s heels as they woke the council.

 

____

 

“So this is what the big table looks like. It’s...big,” Sera said, looking at the war table and the markers placed on it. 

 

Cassandra yawned, her hair sticking up from her head. “What was so urgent it needed all of us up?” she asked irritably. 

 

Only Cullen and Ursa looked fully awake, both still dressed from their day out. Josephine rubbed her eyes. 

 

“Is this about what you came to office about earlier?” she asked Sera. Sera nodded. She looked accusingly at Vivienne. 

 

“Earlier today Vivienne asked me to go with her to her embassy. She thought there might be some locks I needed to pick and secrets Red Jenny could hear. When we got there we were attacked. It wasn’t an amatuer attack, they knew what they were doing. When we got back here she said she didn’t need to bother the Inquisitor with it but...it made me feel squiggy.” 

 

Vivienne huffed while the others tried to wake up enough to talk it through. 

 

“You...went out without telling anyone?” Leliana asked on a yawn.

 

“I didn’t know that was a crime,” Vivienne said coolly. 

 

“It isn’t but it is a problem when you put my friends in danger knowingly,” Ursa shot back. The green on her hand crackled as she glared. The other woman sniffed.

 

“She was in no danger. She hid,” Vivienne said.

 

“What were you doing at the embassy? We didn’t have any information leading us there,” Leliana asked, shifting through a pile of papers at the end of the table. 

 

“You didn’t but I did. A while back we had a clerk, Calpurnia, who worked with us. She was fired for some...not so savory remarks made to others. It wasn’t until information about Corypheus started getting back to us that I put it all together. I believed she might have left some information in the office pertaining to her work with him. It seems she was ready for someone from the Inquisition to come. Her files were wiped and as Sera mentioned, we were attacked upon arrival,” Vivienne explained.

 

“So why Sera?” Ursa asked as Josephine scribbled the name “Calpurnia” on a scrap of paper. 

 

“Varric is too vexing and Cole’s a dragon,” Vivienne said with a shrug. “I needed a human secret finder. I truly didn’t think we’d be attacked. It was such a slim chance.” 

 

“So this Calpurnia, how do you know she works for Corypheus?” Cullen asked. He tried to cover his yawn with his arm but didn’t make it. Ursa smiled at him, flipping the coin he’d given her so he could see it. He smiled back. Ursa passed the coin over her knuckles, a trick Sera had taught her on a slow afternoon years before. 

 

“Inquisitor are you listening or are you too busy flirting?” Vivienne asked, her crisp tone cutting through Ursa’s thoughts. 

 

“I’m sorry, what?” Ursa said, shaking her head. Cullen looked suitably scolded, crossing his arms and refocusing. Ursa tried to do the same.

 

“I  _ said  _ Calpurnia used to tell us she felt like a slave in her own life. She felt helpless. She too was Dalish. She’d run from her home in the hopes of a better life but didn’t find it. Instead she’d ended up as a clerk for the Glory which is not what she’d wanted. She was bitter. By the end she was talking about a new power in the world. One that would change the world for the better. She spoke of a new, old god. I can only assume she means Corypheus,” Vivienne said. 

 

“So you got nothing from the embassy?” Leliana asked. 

 

“No, it was all gone. Which is why I said we didn’t need to bother the Inquisitor. I didn’t think she’d need to hear about a woman who may or may not be important to him and the information we didn’t find,” Vivienne said, sounding annoyed with the whole conversation. 

 

Ursa felt her temper flare at the woman’s disregard. “Forgive me, Vivienne, but you came to  _ us  _ to help. You come and go as you please, never telling us anything and I have yet to see you be helpful beyond greeting politicians who  _ Josephine _ gets in the door. Anything you hear should be immediately given to one of us. It’s not up to you to decide what to do with information, it’s up to us,” she snapped. 

 

Vivienne gave Ursa a cold smile. “You’ve certainly changed since you came to my ball. Such an unsure young woman then. Look at you now. Tell me, Inquisitor, what happens when this is over and you no longer need to control an army? Will you be able to go back to a normal life?” 

 

The room was silent as the two women stared each other down. 

 

“I don’t think it’s any of your business what I plan to do when this ends,” Ursa said tersely. 

 

“On the contrary, my dear. You made it everyone’s business when you started bedding your commander,” Vivienne said snidely. 

 

Ursa saw red, a sneer crossing her face as she took a step forward. 

 

“That’s it,” Cassandra said sharply, “You, get out. You’ve outworn your welcome in this room. You two, sit down.  _ Now.”  _

 

Vivienne swept from the room, nose in the air. Sera followed afterwards, watching Ursa worriedly. 

 

“I’m not going to harm her,” Cassandra said more gently, “You may go back to bed.” 

 

Sera watched Ursa nod before leaving. Cassandra shut the door, turning on Cullen and Ursa. Josephine and Leliana flanked her. 

 

“Is this where you yell at me for that? Because it isn’t any of her business. It’s no ones,” Ursa said defensively. 

 

“No,” Cassandra denied, “It isn’t anyone’s business but your own. But you can’t alienate everyone who asks and you can’t rise to the bait. It is inevitable that people will come after you. If you snap at every person who mentions him to you, you’ll put a bigger target on your back. You two need to figure out what it is you’re doing and you need to do it  _ fast _ . The world will come after you and it will not be kind.”

 

“They already call me a backwoods hick in America,” Ursa mumbled. 

 

“And they could do far worse. Remember that. Now get out. We’ll see you both in the morning to talk about this development,” Cassandra said. 

 

Cullen didn’t speak as he passed Cassandra. She touched his shoulder, a gentle look crossing her face. He smiled back before yawning once more and heading to his room. He had things he needed to think about. His relationship with Ursa being one of the first things on the list. Ursa trudged towards her own room, stopping only to wave quietly to Cullen before climbing the stairs. She didn’t care what people thought of them. She would fight for him until she couldn’t any longer. She just wished she could figure out how to tell him that. 

 

The next day she left once again, sighing as Cullen pressed her to a dark corner to kiss her goodbye. Skyhold bled into the skyline as they drove away, Ursa unsure of what was to come but determined to make sure Cullen was a part of it. 

 

____

 

URSA returned home from her travels two days before the ball at the winter palace. Josephine had ordered her three gowns to choose from and she was daydreaming of chiffon and chantilly lace as she walked through the gates of Skyhold. Dorian had stayed behind to help choose them but he’d been secretive about their designs when she’d asked. 

 

“A shower would be nice,” Iron Bull said, peering at a long scar on his arm. “Infections aren’t enjoyable.” 

 

“I could take a bath,” Cassandra groaned. 

 

“I could join,” Iron Bull joked. Ursa grinned when Cassandra made a noise of disgust. Iron Bull had been laying it on thick for the two weeks they’d been travelling. Ursa wondered when Cassandra was going to snap. 

 

“I like baths,” Cole said. His voice always sounded airy, as if he were far away. His form flickered as he stalked beside Dyna. Dyna had grown more comfortable with the dragon, though even Solas couldn’t say exactly what he was.

 

“ **I need a fire stone,”** Dyna hummed. 

 

Ursa opened her mouth to reply only to stop in her tracks. Cullen was on the main steps, a coffee mug in one hand and a stack of papers in the other. He was headed in the direction of the training rings, his eyes downcast at his work. Ursa felt excitement overwhelm her at the sight of him. She’d missed him while she’d been away. He’d had very little time to talk, leaving her short voicemails that did nothing to ebb the loneliness Ursa felt without him. Seeing him now made her bounce on her toes, her energy renewed. 

 

“Cullen!” she squealed.

 

He turned at his name, realization dawning on his face as he saw her. His slow smile lit up his face. There were people between her and him and she didn’t care, not when he looked at her like that.

 

“Cullen!” she cried again, a laugh bubbling up her belly as she took off running. 

 

Dorian, as luck would have it, was passing by the door, his own morning coffee steaming in his hand. He stopped at the cry and turned. Ursa had told him to wait for an organic moment for them to announce their relationship with. Seeing her face so filled with joy as she ran with single minded determination, he knew that this was it. He fumbled for his phone and hit record, trying to subtly get beside Cullen so he could record the moment they collided.

 

Cullen’s vision had tunneled down to her running at him. He vaguely recognized that she wasn’t slowing down but he didn’t care. He took a few steps forward until he was nearly at the base of the stairs. The morning’s activity had stopped to watch the Inquisitor throw herself up the stairs to him. She ran as if her life depended on it. For a wild moment he thought it just might. If she stopped now they would both drop dead. She didn’t. She was nearly up the stairs when she launched herself forward. His mug smashed to the ground as she threw his arms out to catch her.

 

“Cullen,” she sighed into his collar. He hugged her tightly. He was already in his armor, his trainees waiting for him. She didn’t care. She tightened her grip around his neck and squeaked when he lifted her off her feet. 

 

“I missed you,” he said on an exhale. 

She nuzzled into the fur of his cape. He smelled like morning coffee and his usual spice. She’d missed the scent. 

 

“I missed you too,” she said. 

 

He placed her back on the ground, looking over her shoulder. “I think anyone who didn’t know does now,” he said self consciously. 

 

“Dorian’s recording us to post,” she giggled, “They would know by tonight anyway.”

 

He swallowed hard so she pulled back. “Do you...mind?” she asked, worried that she’d suddenly crossed a line he hadn’t wanted to cross yet.

 

“No,” he said, “Everyone’s staring. That’s all.”

 

“Oh,” Ursa looked over her shoulder and immediately went red. She laughed nervously, curling her fingers in Cullen’s cape and hiding her face in his shoulder. His laugh rumbled through his chest. 

 

“The Inquisitor, embarrassed?” he teased. She pushed against his chest gently. 

 

“Don’t be mean,” she whined. 

 

He tipped her chin upward. “Well, if we’re showing the world what we are to one another, why not go all out?” he said.

 

She gasped in surprise when his lips pressed to hers. She heard a whoop from the people watching and smiled into the kiss, leaning backwards when Cullen deepend the kiss. They stayed there for just a moment longer than was necessary, breaking apart to claps and shouts. Ursa touched her lips, her cheeks red. Cullen’s face was a matching shade of pink but he looked pleased. 

 

“And that’s a wrap,” Dorian said, snapping them out of their haze. 

 

Ursa giggled, looking over at her friend. “Dorian,” she said warmly, turning to open her arms to him. He walked into the hug, squeezing her tightly before letting go.

 

“It’s been boring without you. Hasn’t it, Commander?” Dorian said slyly. 

 

“Truly,” Cullen agreed. 

 

“But you need a bath and Josie is chomping at the bit to show you the gowns she ordered. Run along, Commander. Our dear Inquisitor has womanly things to attend to and you’ve spilled coffee all over your morning reports,” Dorian said. 

 

Cullen looked down, startled to find his papers were indeed scattered and soaked with coffee. 

 

“Oh, do you need help-” Ursa started, reaching to help him while Dorian pulled on her arm.

 

“No. Cullen is a big boy. He can clean up the mess. Come on. Dresses. Pretty jewelry. Clean hair. Think of it, the novelty,” Dorian coaxed. 

 

Ursa let herself be pulled away, a wistful smile shot over her shoulder at Cullen. He shook his head and began to pick up his papers. When one of his men wolf whistled he shot up his middle finger without raising his head. 

 

____

 

DORIAN covertly posted the video to an Inquisition website while Josephine fussed over Ursa and cleaning her hair. Within moments it had thousands of views and comments. Most were positive, causing Dorian to smile to himself and pocket his phone. Ursa slunk from her bathroom in a robe, looking harassed. 

 

“Josie! It’s  _ hair,”  _ she grumbled. 

 

“Which is important. Don’t you want Cullen to be speechless when he sees you?” Josephine asked. 

 

“This isn’t about me and Cullen. I wouldn’t be going if it wasn’t for the Inquisition,” Ursa said feebly. 

 

Josephine shook her head, her own dark curls braided elaborately around her head. “You’re allowed to be woman, though. Take pride. The Inquisition will too.” 

 

“Fine,” Ursa conceded. “Do I get to see the dresses now?” 

 

“Yes,” Josephine said decisively. “Dorian?” 

 

Dorian wheeled over the hanger that Josephine had insisted he carry up all three flights of stairs. He turned it to face Ursa and watched her eyes go wide.

 

“Oh  _ Josie,”  _ she breathed. 

 

“I bet you want your hair to look nice now,” Josephine said smugly. 

 

___

 

URSA was not allowed to see anyone until they loaded into the cars. The dragons had been asked to stay behind. Josephine assumed that the sight of them would enrage everyone in the chance the Inquisition didn’t succeed with their mission. They had all found some sense in that and agreed to leave their partners behind. Ursa said goodbye to Dyna in the main foyer before heading down the steps to where everyone was waiting.

 

“I’m starting to think you like showing me off,” she said to Josephine who was waiting outside the garage for her.  

 

“I did a good job. I want it seen,” Josephine shrugged. 

 

“And the theatrics?” Ursa asked, gesturing to the closed garage.

 

“I want to see their faces. We haven’t seen you dressed up since Vivienne’s ball and then you weren’t sure of yourself. Now? You're a force to be reckoned with and the government will know that. Both sides of it,” Josephine said. She faced Ursa, pursing her lips and cocking her head. “What is it I’m...oh yes.”

 

Josephine pulled a necklace from her bag. “I forgot. I had this made for you.” 

 

It was a simple gold chain with a fine wire cage pendant and small emeralds adorning it. Upon closer inspection Ursa could see a coin inside the cage. She inhaled sharply. 

 

“I had Dorian take it when you got back. I’d hoped you wouldn’t notice. Do you like it?” Josephine asked hesitantly. 

 

“It’s perfect,” Ursa breathed. 

 

“No one will know but you and him. Well, and me and Dorian but you understand. Plenty of people will offer themselves to you tonight and you know what you must tell them, but this? It’s just for you two. I know the trick Dorian pulled. We’re lucky it worked. This night is going to be long and no doubt you’ll be angry before it’s over. So wear this and remember who you are when the eyes of the world aren’t on you,” Josephine said. 

 

Ursa held back her curls that Josephine had meticulously set to allow the other woman to clasp it about her neck. 

 

“Thank you,” Ursa said fervently. 

 

Josephine smiled. “Anything for a friend,” she said. 

 

Ursa offered Josephine her arm. “Come on. We’ll show off your good work.” 

 

____

 

CASSANDRA was messing with Cullen’s tie when the garage opened. Dorian was in a fevered discussion with Varric over literature while Vivienne pretended not to see Sera’s glare and Leiliana watched everyone else. Iron Bull was dubiously pulling on his jacket in the hopes of getting it to fit better. They were all waiting for the Inquisitor to arrive. They looked up as the doors opened. 

 

“Oh wow,” Dorian was the first to speak as they saw Ursa. She wore no gloves, her left hand glowing in the dim light of the garage. 

 

“Inquisitor,” Vivienne said, admiration in her voice. “Where did you get such a lovely gown?” 

 

“Josephine,” Ursa said, her eyes not leaving Cullen’s. “Do you like it?” she asked, clearly speaking only to him. 

 

His jaw worked as he looked her over. The gown had no straps. It hugged her upper body and flowed out from her hips, small crystals tracing swirled lines along the skirt. The bottom was sheer so that as she walked towards them, he could see her legs. The gown itself was a deep forest green with a crystal lining along the top. The skirt hitched up to her hips so it rippled when she moved. It complimented her body perfectly. Unlike their first time in a ballroom, Ursa looked at home in her skin. Her tattoo stood out against her freckles. No makeup had smoothed her skin. Instead, only a light touch of eyeshadow and eyeliner highlighted her bright eyes. She wore diamonds in her ears and red lipstick, her smile a slash across her face. Her hair had been artfully curled and flowed down her shoulder, small braids peeking out when she turned her head. Cullen’s eyes swept to her neck and nearly disregarded the necklace there until she touched it. He stopped and stared. His coin was there, resting between the curve of her breasts. He sucked in a breath.

 

“You look…” he couldn’t finish the sentence. There was no word adequate enough for what welled up inside of him. 

 

She looked down. “Thank you,” she said shyly. 

 

“You look beautiful,” Dorian said, “As do I. Now can we get going? I hear Celene has wonderful wine and I’d like to try some.” 

 

“Yes. Let’s go. The sooner we get there, the sooner we can leave,” Cassandra said. 

 

They loaded into the two cars and left, no one quite sure what to expect from the ball.

 

____

 

“THAT is not at all what I expected a ball to be like,” Sera said when the eventful portion of the evening was over. 

 

Ursa agreed. They’d arrived and entered with Gaspard, a sneaky man with a plan, though not the plan the court thought he’d had. They’d foiled the plot to kill the princess and shone a light on the woman who had tried to carry it out. Yet another agent of Corypheus, Celene’s cousin had nearly stabbed her in front of all the court, claiming Gaspard and the dragons of the north had planned it. They had stopped it, only to have to run after the madwoman and kill her. Ursa had once more heard the voice in her head and had frozen the woman easily, allowing her comrades to cut her down. It hadn’t been a pretty business but the princess was grateful and as Josephine had warned, by the time Sera had found her, Ursa had received over ten proposals. 

 

“It was...eventful,” Ursa said. Sera looked out onto an empty balcony. 

 

“Go ahead,” she said, gesturing with her head, “I’ll make sure no one bothers you.” 

 

Ursa sagged and nodded. “Thanks.” 

 

____

 

CULLEN had fended off more women then he’d thought possible in the last hour. He wanted to scream. The last one had been half his age. He’d been gracious, telling her he was taken. She’d only tittered.

 

“I know,” she’d lilted, “But in case you ever get bored, Commander.” 

 

He’d crumpled the paper she’d handed him once she was out of sight. When someone tapped his shoulder, he tensed. It was only Sera, her short yellow dress and black spotted flats standing out in the sea of gowns and suits.

 

“Come on,” she said. He followed, too tired to fight her. She pushed him through a set of glass doors onto a balcony, closing the curtains with a loud  _ shhhk!  _ And shutting the doors as she left. 

 

“Oh,” Ursa said, turning. 

 

“Ursa,” Cullen greeted, relief causing his shoulders to sag. 

 

“You too, huh?” Ursa said wryly. 

 

“I’ve never seen so many women that were so gorgeous and so much alike. They’re all the same,” he said. 

 

“They were gorgeous?” Ursa asked, leaning back on the marble railing. 

 

“Yes,” Cullen said, liking the glint in her eyes, “Breathtaking.” 

 

She scowled.

 

“But,” he continued, “Every single one of them was the same. The same smile. The same words. The same laugh. None of them smelled of honeysuckle or open sky.”

 

Ursa smiled, appeased. She turned to lean over the railing, looking over the gated gardens. She’d killed five spies on the cobblestone there only hours earlier. She sighed.

 

“Are you alright?” Cullen asked, leaning beside her. 

 

“Just tired. This night was long,” she said. She curled her finger in the chain around her neck. He watched the movement, tapping the pendent with his pointer finger.

 

“Whose idea was this?” he asked softly.

 

“Josephine. She had Dorian steal it. Do you like it?” she asked.

 

He didn’t know what to say. 

 

_ “It makes me think you’re mine. No one else's. Yes. I like it. It makes me feel as if I’m a man.”  _ Anscomb was not there to hear his thoughts but he projected them anyway. He couldn’t say those words aloud. He nodded. 

 

“I do. It looks lovely,” he said. She smiled.

 

“Good. I like it too,” she said. 

 

“Since I probably won’t get this chance again anytime soon,” he said, offering her his hand. She looked up in delighted surprise.

 

“I thought you don’t dance,” she said.

 

“I don’t usually. You’ve seen why. But it would be such a waste of that dress for me not to ask,” he replied. 

 

She smiled and took his hand, letting him pull her close. This time he didn’t step on her toes. He didn’t waver when putting his hand to her waist. She let her head rest on his shoulder and together, they twirled under the stars. 

 

Tomorrow there would be a new threat, something else for them to focus on. For the moment though, they needed only to see one another. Cullen spun her effortlessly and she held her head high. The night was long but Ursa didn’t want to see the light of day. She wanted only this moment with the man she loved. Looking up at him, she smiled. 


	9. 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a party at Skyhold. Ursa goes into the Fade. Cullen and Ursa finally discuss the future. And the story finally lives up to its rating.

Chapter 9 

 

IT was nearing 3 AM by the time Ursa had taken a shower and was digging through her drawers for underwear. She’d shed her dress and unpinned her hair before pulling the earrings from her ears. She’d pondered taking off the necklace Josephine had given her but one look at the coin and she’d left it. It might have been a reminder for the ball but she wanted to keep it on. She liked feeling as if she belonged to someone. Shaking her head, she pulled out a pair of black panties and began pulling them on. Dorian entered without knocking, barely looking at Ursa’s naked form.

 

“Good, you’re up. Put on some clothes. There’s a party in the dining hall and I think you need it,” he said. 

 

“It’s 3 in the morning,” Ursa protested. Dorian smirked.

 

“And that’s mattered since when?” he asked. 

 

She looked at the gown she’d hung back up. She’d spent a night being someone she wasn’t. Dorian was right. It was time to go back to being the woman she’d been before, if only for a night.

 

“Something trashy?” she asked. His smirk turned into a grin. 

 

“Oh yes.”

 

_____

 

CULLEN heard the music just as he was sliding into his bed. He groaned, debating simply staying in bed for a brief moment before forcing himself to get up. He put on his discarded jeans from earlier in the day and slipped on a white T-shirt before climbing down the stairs of his loft and padding to the dining hall. What he saw made him shake his head and consider just turning around and leaving. 

 

The hall was filled with people.It seemed everyone who lived or worked in Skyhold was there dancing to the loudest music Cullen had heard in a long time. People were laughing, drinking, speaking loudly. His eyes swept the room. First he found Josephine, a plastic cup in her hand, speaking with a pretty woman who looked starstruck just to be standing with her. Cassandra was sitting in the corner, a book in her hand and her toe tapping gently to the beat. He didn’t see Leliana or Solas but Varric was laughing loudly with Iron Bull while Cole raced in the rafters with a group of dragons. In the lull of a new song starting a shriek caught Cullen’s attention. He turned to see Dorian dancing on a table, a woman’s slim form pressed against him. She turned as the new song swelled and Cullen blinked. It was Ursa, a pair of ripped jean shorts riding up her back so the curves of her ass could be seen. Ursa in a low cut halter top and no shoes laughing as Dorian spun her. There were others watching her, mesmerized by her laugh and swaying hips, as she danced. For once she wasn’t the Herald or the Inquisitor, she was just a young woman dancing. Cullen couldn’t look away. 

 

“She loves to dance,” Sera said beside him, causing him to jump.

 

“She told me,” he said. On the table, Ursa swiveled her hips, leaning back into Dorian. His hands slid up her waist to rest against the curve of her breast. She smiled at the touch, leaning back into him. Cullen swallowed, his throat suddenly dry. 

 

“You should ask her to dance,” Sera said, nudging his arm. 

 

He watched her. She looked at home in her body, hips swaying and flashes of cleavage showing each time Dorian pushed against her. 

 

“I can’t do that,” Cullen denied.

 

Sera cocked her head and watched the two dance. “Yeah. She and Dorian were always the envy of parties. They made sure of it. It was the only place she felt really comfortable when we were at the Keep. She could be the center of attention if she was dancing. It made her feel...different, I guess. Still, she’d forgive you any fumbling. It’s you.” 

 

Cullen couldn’t look away. Ursa moved like she was water. Her body flowed with the pounding beats. She smiled as Dorian handed her a bottle, taking a shot straight from the heavy glass. She turned, looking to her right, crooking her finger at someone. For a moment Cullen felt disappointed until he saw Krem climb up onto the table. Dorian grinned, catching his boyfriend’s shirt in his hand and turning to pull Krem into the dance. Ursa’s head fell back, her head lolling as she danced. For a moment she stood alone. She rolled her body, lost in the pound of the music. There was a content smile on her face that startled away when the two men pulled her in with them. She danced between them, laughing as hands trailed over her body. 

 

“That could be you,” Sera taunted with a grin. They watched her dance between Dorian and Krem for a few more moments until the song changed. It was slower and they stopped to breath, Ursa noticing Cullen for the first time. She smiled, her eyes playful. She said something to Dorian and then hopped off the table, stalking towards Cullen with a predatory look in her eye.

 

“And I’m out,” Sera said, giving Cullen a mock salute. 

 

Ursa reached him, leaning back onto her heels. “Commander,” she greeted with a lazy smile. 

 

There was a sharpness to her he wasn’t used to seeing. She was comfortable where she was and it showed. This was her world, the one she’d grown up in. Being the head of the Inquisition had helped her become more confident but here, barefoot in the dining hall with a bottle of vodka in her hand, she was home. He loved it. 

 

“Inquisitor,” he replied, deciding to play her game. She brought her hand to her necklace, toying with the pendant. She grinned when his eyes dropped and stayed fixated on it. It rested between her breasts. He watched it catch the light as she twirled it. 

 

“I didn’t think this would be your scene,” she said. 

 

“No, but it’s yours and I’m enjoying the view,” he said, surprised at his own candor. She grinned in delight. It was as if the night had opened something for them. She leaned forward so she was invading his space. 

 

“Would you like to dance? Or would you rather watch? I’m sure Dorian could be up for more,” she said teasingly. 

 

Cullen wondered fleetingly what “more” could mean but decided it didn’t matter. He’d gone to dances when he’d been in the Keep. They were aimed for the teens but he thought he could at least try to keep up. When she looked at him like that he didn’t think he could say no. 

 

He took her hand and pulled her towards the table. She laughed, her head thrown back. Dorian winked at them as they neared. Ursa handed him the vodka then turned back to Cullen, sliding her arms around his neck.

 

“Should I go slow?” she flirted.

 

He put his hands on her waist, unable to help giving her a squeeze. “I think I can handle it,” he replied. 

 

She smirked and began to roll her hips, his hands following the movement. He was out of his depth but he didn’t care. She kept her eyes on his until she turned in his arms, pressing her back to his front. He sucked in a breath. Her body was warm against his and his hands faltered. 

 

“I won’t break,” she said, “You can grab onto me.” 

 

It was all he needed to hear. Time no longer mattered. The party continued around them. Dorian dropped beside them at one point, taking a sweaty but smiling selfie before heading to get another drink, Krem gripping his free hand. Cassandra was in a conversation with three recruits who seemed to be in love as they listened to her speak. Around them, Skyhold celebrated.

 

“What’s this for?” Cullen asked. They’d been dancing for too many songs for him to count and sweat was staining the back of his shirt. They’d stayed quiet for most of them, both rooted in the primal tension of their bodies moving. Now Cullen wondered what had brought them to this moment. 

 

Ursa shrugged, turning to face him again. “Dorian said it’s because of how we did at the winter palace. I think it’s just an excuse to have a party, not that I’m complaining. As Josie says, moral matters and this reminds me of before. Simpler times.”

 

“Would you go back if you could?” Cullen asked, spinning her before yanking her back against him. 

 

She shook her head. “No. I like who I am now. I would avoid the war but no, I wouldn’t change it.” She looked up. Dyna was sitting in the rafters, her tail entwined with Anscomb’s as they spoke with the other dragons in the Keep. 

 

“If you could have Dyna but go back, would you?” Cullen persisted, not sure why he wanted to know but knowing that it mattered. 

 

Ursa looked up at him. Sweat had painted her face in dewey drops. Her hair was frizzy from the humid air  and her lips chapped. Her eyes were clear. “No, Cullen. I wouldn’t go back.” 

 

He leaned in, helpless to stop himself. His arms crushed her to him as their mouths met. He wouldn’t give her up for anything. Even if he could erase his past he wouldn’t. Not if it meant he’d have to give her up. It was good to hear her own affirmation. She kissed him back hungrily, settling back onto her heels only when the music stopped.

 

“It’s time for the sunrise,” someone called. By silent agreement everyone shuffled from the hall to the windows or out onto the steps. Cullen pulled Ursa along with him. He found a spot beside Dorian and Krem, Cassandra and Josephine on their other side. Together, Skyhold watched the sun rise above the mountains.

 

“A new day,” Ursa sighed. 

 

Cullen wondered what it would bring. 

 

____

 

URSA sought out Cassandra the next day. The woman was practicing her sword work, spinning into the targets.

 

“You know we have these wonderful new inventions called guns,” Ursa called in amusement. 

 

“I’d rather know where my blows land,” Cassandra said. She dropped the sword into the ground and sidled to Ursa. “Is there something you need?”

 

“Leliana tells me you and her are up for the position as the new head of the Glory. I just wanted to see how you’re doing with that,” Ursa said. 

 

Cassandra shrugged, panting. “The Inquisition is the trend at the moment. I don’t expect it will stick.”

 

“Would you want it to?” Ursa asked. 

 

“I’m...not sure,” Cassandra said. 

 

“I’ll support whatever you decide,” Ursa said firmly. Cassandra looked shocked. 

 

“You will?” she asked.

 

“I’d like to think you’re my friend and besides that, I think you’d make a good head of the Glory. You’re fair. And I think it’s about time we have a leader who sees both sides. You might not have a dragon, but you know our world. The good and the bad. I think you’d see things from every angle. Leliana would too, she’s just more...”  Ursa couldn’t seem to find the right words to explain Leliana but Cassandra understood. 

 

“Well...thank you,” Cassandra said stiffly, “And I’d also like to consider us friends.” 

 

Ursa smiled. “Good. Leliana wants to see us in an hour. We’ve got another lead on Corypheus.”

 

Cassandra nodded. “I’ll be there.”

 

Ursa inclined her head and walked away. It was the start to a good day, she decided, and nothing would get in the way of that.

 

____

 

“THEY call themselves the Grey Wardens,” Leliana explained.

 

“I thought they were a myth? No one’s seen one in hundreds of years,” Ursa said, frowning. 

 

They were gathered around the war table, Ursa perched on the side, staring at the place marker Leliana had just laid out. 

 

“I had thought so too. But there’s one in the Hinterlands, Blackwall. He’s been feeding us information as he gets it from the others. They’ve gone silent but before they did, they were beginning to go mad. Most were having dreams of destruction and death. A world red with blood. He tells me they ran to Corypheus when the dragon promised them a way to fight back,” Leliana said.

 

“Weren’t the wardens meant to protect the people from such an end? They’re tied to nature and our land,” Cullen said. 

 

**“They fought the dragons who brought the first Blight sickness to your land. Most dragons don’t mind them. They only hunt when they need to. Unlike the Blood Brothers, they aren’t unkind,”** Dyna said, ignoring Cullen’s wince. 

 

“Corypheus has them convinced another Blight is coming,” Leliana said.

 

“Wait, a Blight? That was hundreds of years ago. No one’s seen a touch of it since the new rifts have opened. How could he convince them it’s coming back?” Ursa asked. “We don’t even teach it in the Keeps anymore, it’s such an old concept.”

 

“Because he could easily begin one. With the magics he’s toying with, he could open our world to another Blight. Convincing them couldn’t have been too hard when it might very well be the truth,” Leliana said sadly. 

 

“But they’re fighting for him. How could that happen?” Josephine asked. 

 

“ **He was always a cunning liar. He must have convinced them it’s to help the people if they side with him. They probably don’t even know it’s him that’s causing it,”** Dyna said. Anscomb huffed in agreement. 

 

“So do we know where they are? If I could speak with them I might be able to make them see reason,” Ursa said.

 

“That’s where it gets tricky,” Leliana said. “Blackwall reports they’ve been binding dragons to them. They kill their own partners to bind a feral to them. He says the dragons go willingly to their deaths but it’s barbaric. The ferals are called to the ritual and then bound. It turns the dragon into a slave to their will which is, subsequently, Corypheus’ will. They will not be easy to reason with once they’ve undergone the change. Most become Tranquil once they’ve killed their own dragons, making them even easier to control.” 

 

Ursa sighed. “Of course they do. Because nothing is ever simple.” 

 

“We must get to them quickly if we wish to stop their advance. With an army of Tranquil riders and bound feral dragons, Corypheus will be nearly unstoppable,” Cullen mused.

 

“Where are they and how fast can I get there?” Ursa asked, ready to save the world yet again.

 

____

 

EVERYTHING had gone down hill very fast. Ursa should have seen it coming, really. These things never had gone easily for her.They’d hunted down the Grey Wardens at their Keep and had managed to talk some sense into their leader when a large feral dragon had approached. Dyna translated its hissing and internal speech, sounding more worried with each word. 

 

**“It’s his….mate is the wrong word but it’s close. His** **_salazara._ ** **It’s like a soul bound human only among dragons. They protect one another. Usually the stronger one protects the weaker one but in this case I think it’s the other way round. She’s been sent to make sure the wardens finish their binding. She plans to kill us and take our Fade magic. If they can...bind me...they can use me as they’d always planned,”** Dyna had a hard time saying the words, shivering as she did. 

 

“They won’t take you,” Ursa vowed. The dragon above them reared her head and charged. Ursa closed her eyes and prayed. 

 

Ever since her first encounter with the voice in her head, she’d taken to praying when she needed help. Always, the voice came to her. This time was no different. She spoke loudly, knowing that whatever it was would help them. When Cassandra cried out, she looked up in surprise. A rift was opening in front of them. It was as big as the one at the Conclave and it rippled at the edges, calling Ursa and Dyna to it. Ursa took a step forward, mesmerized by its light. 

 

“No!” Cassandra cried, trying to catch Ursa’s arm as she walked towards it.

 

Around them the rest of the wardens were trying to fend of the dragon. Outside the gates, Inquisition forces were joining the fight.Their shouts could be heard from the back of the Keep. They’d fought the dragons into the open air of the courtyard but the feral dragon had backed them onto a bridge, trying to corner them at the shrine on the far end. It landed forcefully on the bridge, causing the stones to crack beneath their feet. Ursa saw none of it. Her eyes began to glow and she looked back at Cassandra, a soft smile making her face look earrie. 

 

“It’s alright, Cassandra, I won’t harm you. My dear wolf, I hadn’t expected to see you here. Varric, my darling how lovely to finally meet you. Come. I will lead you out,” Ursa said, another voice layering with her own. 

 

Solas’ eyes widened at the greeting but the others were too stunned to notice. 

 

“We can’t go into the Fade. We’ll come out...wrong,” Varric said, stumbling when the ground rippled. He missed Hawke’s comforting presence, wishing fervently for his dragon. 

 

“You will see him again if you come with me. I will lead you through. All of you. It’s not your time yet but it is theirs,” Ursa said, gesturing to the wardens. Inquisition forces had finally reached the bridge. Bloodied soldiers took on what was left of the Tranquil wardens and their bound dragons. Cassandra looked back at Ursa.

 

“We can’t leave them,” she argued. 

 

Dyna hissed, a long sound that made Ursa nod her approval. “You must. They will be led to the gates of their gods. You cannot fall here. Please. Come with us.” 

 

The ground shook, knocking the three fighters forward. Cassandra fell forward only to be caught by Ursa’s right hand. It curled easily around her own. Cassandra stared at the hand. 

 

“Where is she?” she asked as Ursa helped her up. The other woman tilted her head, green eyes curious. 

 

“She’s here. And she’s in there. She is alive. I simply needed to borrow her. She let me. She called to me. Please. Let me help you,” Ursa’s voice pleaded. 

 

Cassandra looked back at Varric and Solas. Solas nodded slowly. He knew who had been helping Ursa and they were safe from harm with the being. Cassandra’s shoulders slumped.

 

“Alright,” she said. 

 

“Very good,” Ursa said warmly. “The bridge is about to give. Watch your step.” 

 

They followed her into the rift, Varric flinching as the bridge gave out behind him. He heard the screams before they were cut off, the rift closing behind them. They all turned to Ursa.

 

“Let her go,” Cassandra said flatly. “You’re a spirit or a dragon or something. You don’t need her in here.”

 

“Of course,” Ursa said graciously before slumping to the ground. Dyna shook her head, the feral magic in her blood singing but not enough to block out her concern for Ursa. 

 

“ **_Ursa?”_ ** she asked. 

 

“Why didn’t you tell me it was Andraste herself?” Ursa groaned, pushing herself back up to her feet. 

 

“Andraste?” Varric echoed in disbelief.

 

“My dear, you never would have believed had I told you,” the voice Ursa had heard in her head so many times, said. They looked up. Above them a golden dragon hovered. She was stunning, shining in the green glow of the Fade. She was large, bigger than Dyna, her scales the size of Ursa’s body. 

 

“You don’t speak dragon tongue,” Cassandra said. 

 

“I can. I can also speak in your minds or aloud. I choose this simply for your convenience. Now we must be going. They’ll know you’re here soon and I cannot sway so many,” Andraste said, her split tail swinging behind her. 

 

“Wait! You’ve been helping me all along. How?” Ursa cried. 

 

Andraste turned to the woman. “I am tied to all of those who are tied to the Fade. I couldn’t have helped you had you not called out to me, but you did. I gave you what you needed. The ability is in you, in Dyna, in all dragons and their riders if only they could see. Corypheus mistakes blood for power. He wouldn’t need Dyna if he understood such a thing but he’s blind. Your kind have forgotten. I am tied to the Fade but my rider was tied to the Earth. Together, we created a perfect union. When they hunted us and killed him I fled here and soon both humans and dragons forgot what we could be. Now Corypheus hopes to take my power for himself. He wishes to use Dyna to open a rift that will allow the magics of this place to overrun your world. He wishes for a new Blight and a new world for dragons. We can’t let him. The Fade is not meant for your kind. Not for long. It would drive you mad or simply kill you. He wishes to free that power for his own gain.”

 

Cassandra was the first to speak. “You had a rider?” 

 

Andraste’s laugh was like bells on the wind. “Of course. The Glory forgets that. To them he was nothing more than a simple human. While they wish to bond dragon and human it is very well known who has the power. With him, we both did. Human nature and dragon magic combined is a beautiful thing when it’s given room to grow.” 

 

“You can’t leave the Fade?” Solas asked. 

 

Andraste looked at him, her eyes calculating. “No,” she replied finally, “No being like me should ever leave such a place. I’m too old now. I would turn to ash on their land unless I took over a body and I will not do such a thing. Every living thing has a right to its life. Don’t you agree?” 

 

“I do. Fervently. It’s why I’d like to get out here sometimes today,” Varric interrupted. Dyna looked between Andraste and Solas but said nothing. 

 

Andraste laughed once more, turning in the air and pointing with her neck. “There’s a rift to be opened there. They’d hoped to lure your soldiers to it but that didn’t work out. I can open it and let you out but we need to be quick. The battle is bloody. The sooner we get there, the sooner your leaders retreat.”

 

“The wardens…” Ursa trailed off as they started walking. 

 

“You stopped them. Corypheus will not have his bound army. You are doing a beautiful job, my dear. More than even I could do, I think. Corypheus would bring a reign of terror not just to humans but to dragons as well. I applaud you for your efforts,” Andraste said. 

 

They continued walking. Noises reached out from across the glowing green forest. There were large boulders blocking the view to the north but the rest was wide and sprawling. It was almost pretty, Ursa thought idly. 

 

“Your Commander fights bravely,” Andraste hummed, “He stands at the front with his men.”

 

“What?” Ursa barked, pulled from her thoughts. 

 

“He stands with his men. Though the bridge has fallen he won’t give. He prays for you. And for strength,” Andraste said. She flew on, causing Ursa to speed up. Dyna whined beside her. 

 

**_“Don’t let her rile you up. She’s a goddess. She might not have been once but she is now. She’s forgotten what it’s like to love. Keep going. I can feel the Fade taking me from you. We must get out,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

“I meant no harm, dear Dyna. Only to give her some solace. He lives and with my luck, he will continue to. Now hurry, the Fade will take you all if we don’t,” the golden dragon purred. The group moved faster at the words, huddled close to one another as the strange sounds of the Fade reached them. 

 

____

 

THE rift spot was pretty. It sat in a circle of trees that overlooked a green tinted lake. A large wolf like animal sat there, sipping water lazily and watching them. Andraste ignored it. It watched Solas with interest, causing the man to shift nervously. 

 

“Come, come. I’ll open the door and you go through. Keep praying and I will be with you. Remember that,” she said. 

 

Ursa stopped in front of her, looking up. “Thank you.”

 

“I hope you get what you desire, my dear,” the dragon said. “You will hold my power throughout your life and we will always be together. Of this I am certain. There is no need to thank me. The world will turn on and I will live. Someday you will not. I just hope to see that day be a long time from now. Now, go. The door is opening. Dyna, my darling, remember. It isn’t just you. You can teach them all. Make Corypheus think. Take from him what he believes to only be his. Only you can do this and you must. Remind them of what they are. May you fly to the sun one day, my darling glow-scale.”

 

Andraste rubbed her nose along Dyna’s back, causing the smaller dragon to squirm. She then pushed them forward one by one. First Cassandra, who exited the Fade with a cry. Then Varric and Solas until only Ursa stood with her.

 

“Andraste…” Ursa whispered. “What happened at the Conclave?” 

 

“Do you truly wish to see, my dear?” Andraste asked softly. 

 

Ursa nodded.

 

“Very well,” the dragon hummed. She pressed her snout to Ursa’s forehead. “When you sleep, it will come. I must say it is not a gift. Justinia prayed to me as she died. I wish I could have saved her. Go now. You must. Go.” 

 

Ursa stumbled when the dragon pushed her hard. She fell through the rift, hearing cries of surprise from around her and the loud scream of shots being fired. She turned, closing the rift easily and slumping when the energy of the Fade seeped from her. She called a retreat quickly, the trip back to Skyhold a blur of confusing conversations and ringing ears. She barely made it to her bed before she fell asleep. 

 

____

 

“SOMEONE help me!” Justinia cried. Ursa, newly waxed egg in her hands, kicked open the door at the cry. Wardens surrounded the old woman and her dragon. They were in a basement below where the meeting was meant to be. Ursa looked on in confusion.

 

“ **Kill the Dalish girl. Take the egg** ,” a cold voice said in dragon tongue. Ursa ran when they came for her. She couldn’t fight so it was fear that pushed her feet forward. She stumbled, running as the voice in her head instructed. She’d always thought it was Justinia who had pushed her but it was Andraste’s voice she now knew. 

 

The Keep was a maze and she’d ended up backed into a corner, the egg held tightly in her hands. When the wardens had reached for her she’d tried to pull back. She’d tried to retreat further into the wall. She’d prayed for someone, anyone, to help her. When the egg flared green, she’d winced. 

 

It hadn’t been dragonfire that had killed all those people. It had been Andraste. Andraste’s terrible reach coming to the aid of the one who called. Ursa jolted awake, surprised that it was morning and that birds could still be singing. 

 

**_“It was me,”_ ** Dyna said, shaken by the revelation. “ **_I did this. I killed all of those dragons and people.”_ **

 

_ “No,”  _ Ursa replied in her mind, the words gentle as she stroked Dyna’s head, “ _ Andraste did this. We never could have. She was so busy fighting the war she forgot about the casualties. You were right. She isn’t the dragon she once was.” _

 

**_“She is right though. I can teach them. How to be like we were without losing who we are. It’s in me. It’s why I can do such things. I was born for this,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

Ursa nodded. “So do it. She wasn’t perfect. No one is. But she did save us. And Cullen.”

 

Ursa shivered at the words. Cullen on the front lines. Cullen praying. She could have lost him. She slid to her feet, dressing herself distractedly. She hadn’t planned to do much that day. Josephine had told her the night before that they would get one day’s reprieve before needing to be back to work. She dressed for a lazy day in her room, not paying attention to what she pulled on her body. 

 

“ **_Go see him. You need to. You both need it. He’s out of his mind with worry as well. Go. Anscomb and I will fly. Skyhold is quiet today. No one will bother you,”_ ** Dyna coaxed. 

 

Ursa nodded, slipping on shoes and rushing down the stairs. When she reached Cullen’s office she heard voices inside. He was debriefing his troops. She slid in at the back, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed. She didn’t mind waiting. Just seeing him was a relief. She hadn’t laid eyes on him since before they’d left to fight the wardens. The troops had followed her advance and gone in on his call. When they’d returned home, he’d ridden with his men. He looked up, seeing her for the first time, and began to close out the meeting. 

 

It took another 10 minutes for him to finish. She waited and watched patiently. When he finally closed the door behind his men, he groaned, resting his head against the wood. He was still in his armor as he looked at her.

 

“Wishing we were somewhere else?” she asked. 

 

“Dragon’s talons….if I thought I was busy before…” he turned and walked back to his desk. The sun was already beginning to set, much to Ursa’s surprise. She must have slept through most of the day. Her dreams had been heavy and she hadn’t thought to check the time. 

 

“I’m not looking forward to the meeting I’m sure is coming. It’s not everyday Andraste pulls you into the Fade with her,” Ursa said. 

 

Cullen sighed. “I...was scared for you.” 

 

“I know,” Ursa said without thinking.

 

“You know?” Cullen asked, “Am I that obvious?” 

 

“No,” Ursa laughed, “Andraste told me. You prayed to her while we were in the Fade.” 

 

“Dragon’s...and she told you,” Cullen said wearily, shaking his head. Ursa smiled, finding his embarrassment endearing. 

 

“It’s alright. I would have done the same if I’d known you were fighting on the front lines. Do you...do you ever think about what you’ll do after this?” she asked. She’d been holding the question for weeks, never having managed to get up the courage to ask it. She half expected him to tell her he was going home, that he would stop fighting. She wouldn’t have begrudged him the idea. 

 

“I didn’t used to,” he confessed, “I didn’t think I’d make it through. It wasn’t until recently that I’ve even considered it. I know...I know that I won’t want to walk away from this. From you.” 

 

He turned to her, his thumb running over her lips. The texture of his glove made her shiver but he turned away too quickly for her to respond.

 

“I’m sorry. I never...I didn’t even…” he sighed in obvious frustration, leaning over his desk where piles of papers covered his laptop. 

 

Ursa slid in front of him, wedging herself between him and the desk, her hands resting on the computer for balance. 

 

“Cullen,” she murmured, “Do you even need to ask?” 

 

He stopped, staring at her. He always had the most heartbreaking look when he gazed at her. She’d pretended she was making it up. Told herself that no man could ever look at her like that. But he did. He looked at her with awe. As if he couldn’t believe she was standing in front of him. She probably got the same look on her face when she saw him. 

_  
__“No wonder everyone knew,”_ she thought giddily, “ _it’s the most obvious thing in the world.”_

Cullen touched her lip once more. “No,” he said, “No, I don’t think I do.” 

 

He kissed her, his arms wrapping around her waist and boosting her onto the edge of his desk. Her legs opened to allow him closer and he stepped between them without hesitation. This was no kiss on the battlements. This wasn’t rushed or worried. Much like their kiss on the bluffs, Cullen took his time. He arched her backwards as his tongue slipped into her mouth, tangling with hers. Her hands scrambled for purchase, knocking a glass paperweight to the ground. It shattered, causing her to pull back with a gasp. She scrambled forward onto her feet.

 

“I’m-” she began only to watch Cullen’s face go dark. He swept his arms across the desk, knocking everything to the floor. 

 

“Your laptop-” she protested but he cut her off. 

 

He took her waist firmly and helped her to boost back onto the desk. “Josephine will get me a new one,” he growled. She sucked in a breath and nodded. Twining her fingers in the unruly curls at the back of his neck, she pulled him back to her. There would be no more waiting. No more careful touches. She wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled. He stumbled into her, his mouth meeting hers as if it were the most natural thing in the world. He’d always loved her mouth. From the moment he’d seen her, shocked and scared at the base of Haven, he’d dreamt of it. Wondered how it would feel beneath his own. Fantasized about it opening for his cock. He’d been ashamed then. He wasn’t now. With a primal groan, he laid her back on the desk, pausing to look at her.

 

She’d come to him in cotton shorts and a tank top. Her bra strap, a frilly pink, had slid down her shoulder. Her hair was splayed behind her and she looked at him in the dim lamp light with a predatory smile. Her bright eyes were dark now, pupils wide. She showed no shame, no remorse, her legs spread from where he’d been standing. She reached for him. 

 

“My armor,” he protested. 

 

“Take it off,” she replied. “I want to watch.” 

 

He stepped back, helpless to do anything but give her what she wanted. First he peeled off his gloves and her fingers ticked down her stomach. They stopped at her belly button, a teasing smile on her lips. 

“More,” she ordered. 

 

He unclipped his cape, dropping it to the floor behind him. She pushed the hem of her tank top up an inch.

This continued as he removed plate after plate. By the time he was finished, her fingers had sunk into her shorts and he was hard. He stood before her for a moment, watching her shorts shift with the movement of her hand. 

 

“Come here,” she crooned. He climbed onto the desk, covering her body with his own.

 

She immediately withdrew her hand from her shorts, the green sparking as she licked her fingers. He pulled her hand away, kissing her forcefully. She tasted of her own body and he wanted more. He hadn’t locked his doors. The windows were open and though it was slipping into night, guards would be walking the battlements. He didn’t care. Looking down he saw the single gold chain swung tight around her neck, the pendent behind her head. His pendant. His coin. She was  _ his.  _ For once, he didn’t care who saw or heard. He pulled her fingers to his mouth and sucked on them so she gasped. They were both still dressed. Him in pants and a t-shirt and her in her rumpled bed clothes. He pulled the tank top over her head roughly, stopping when it had been thrown to the ground. 

 

There was a scar down her stomach. It was healed but still red. New, then. From a trip out into the wilderness. He traced it gently. 

 

“It’s nothing,” she said gently, “Just a dragon talon. Solas helped.” 

 

Her pink bra covered her breasts but this felt more intimate. The scar reached down to her belly button, curving away to the right where she must have tried to run. He leaned down, running his tongue gently along the line. She whimpered. Her fingers found his hair, gripping tightly. 

 

“C..Cullen,” she hiccuped. 

 

He knew she must have slept with others. He certainly had. But it had not been many and never like this. He needed her to enjoy what he did to her, wanted her to love it. For the first time since their bond had opened, Cullen closed the connection to Anscomb. He needed this to be about her. Only her. As he kissed and laved at the scar he understood what Anscomb had meant. He was no longer alone. 

 

Ursa felt wet heat rush between her thighs and she squirmed. Rushed quickies to satisfy an itch was nothing compared to Cullen’s mouth. And he hadn’t even entered her yet. She’d never said the words that repeated in her head at his touch. She’d never meant them until now. Love was a concept for friends, not lovers. Now she understood what it could mean. Quietly, she closed her connection to Dyna. Some things belonged only to her and she was realizing this was one of them. 

 

Her scent was tantalizing this close to her core. His fingers brushed the top of her shorts but he didn’t push. She wiggled as he kissed around her belly button. Half sitting up, she unhooked her bra and let it fall away. Cullen froze. 

 

Ursa knew she had a nice body. She’d learned when men stared and when they tried to touch her. She’d hated it. Wished she could be slim like the true Dalish girls. She’d wished for a smaller waist, smaller breasts, anything to disappear into the crowd. Cullen made her feel beautiful. She let her bra fall away with a shy smile, letting him see her, hoping he could understand that it was because of him that she felt this way. His eyes traced the shape of her before his hands did. His fingers trembled when they touched her nipples, causing her back to arch. 

 

“Tease,” she said breathlessly when he only touched. 

 

“Tell me what you like. What you want,” he replied, awed. 

 

“Touch me. More. Harder. I want…” she trailed off, unsure if she could say what she wished. Unsure if gentle Cullen would be offended by the suggestion. 

 

He kissed her neck, coaxing the words from her. 

 

“What do you want?” he murmured into her skin, sliding back down her body so his breath skimmed her nipple. 

 

“I want,” she said, pausing to whimper as his tongue touched the hardening bud. “I want you to mark me. I want everyone to know who I’ve chosen.  _ Andraste’s fire!  _ I want to know. To feel you beyond tonight. Oh christ, I want you to mark me as yours, Cullen. Please.”

 

His touch made her shudder. His mouth made her cry out and her words made him come alive. Any hesitation he’d had dissipated. His mouth latched onto her nipple, sucking as his hand slid into her shorts. Pushing wet panties aside, he gently slid one finger inside of her. She held his head to her breast, sobbing out his name along with a string of curses as he curved the finger inside of her. She was tight and he knew without asking that this wasn’t something she did often. He liked that idea, pushing upward until he hit the spot he was looking for. She squealed loudly, her legs nearly closing. He nudged them open again, deciding then to do what he never had for anyone else. He began to slide off the desk, pulling her hips so she slid with him.

 

“Cullen?” she asked, taking her arm away from her eyes where she had thrown it. 

 

He didn’t respond, instead pulling her shorts down and tossing them, along with her panties, to the pile of clothes. He pulled his own shirt off quickly before propping her legs on his shoulders. He knelt between her legs, eyes on her face as he kissed the inside of her knee. 

 

“Cullen?” she said again, her voice rising. 

 

He pressed kisses up her leg, the sweet smell of her wetness begging him to taste. Still, he took his time. It was early still. He wanted to keep her with him for as long as he could. Finally, his mouth reached her sex. She pressed her heels into his back. 

 

“Don’t be hasty,” he chided with a laugh. She whined. 

 

He responded by licking her, his tongue pressing into her wet opening. She screamed. Anyone outside would know. It was early evening and the recruits would be cleaning the yard. They would hear. Cullen didn’t care. He dove into her, rubbing her clit with his thumb while he sucked and licked. She writhed, her body pinned by a single hand gently pressing on her hips. Her legs tightened around his head and she pulled him closer with her heels. He greedily continued his ministrations, adding a finger inside of her and then another until she wept his name. 

 

The first wave of her orgasm was blinding. Her eyes closed and she swore she saw stars. His name fell from her lips like a prayer and for a fleeting second she wondered if Andraste could feel their pleasure. Her body shook with sweet aftershocks. He didn’t stop touching her until her body settled. Slowly, he removed his fingers and stood. She blinked away the high, her body still thrumming. He looked so satisfied, so purely  _ male _ . She wanted to rile him up too, make him cry out her name. She sat up. He was still in his pants but she took the time to admire his chest. There were scars along his body and she longed to kiss each one but her need to touch him won out. She slipped from the table to her knees. 

 

“Ursa…” he said sharply as she started undoing the buttons.

 

“I’ll have you know I’ve done this only twice,” she told him, “So be honored.”

 

He caught her chin, forcing her to look up and pause her movements. “I am,” he said with raw honesty. She blinked back tears, thinking he might not understand that they were of joy. She nodded. 

 

“Alright then.” 

 

Freeing him from his pants was easy. Studying his body would take longer.

 

_ “Thank god he’s mine,”  _ she thought.  _ “I have my life to stare at him.”  _

 

She felt only relief at the idea. She’d hoped that her life would intertwine with his. Ever since that first day at Haven she’d dreamt of him. With shaking fingers, she reached out and wrapped her hand around his length. 

 

“My right hand is useless,” she said, “So bear with me.”

 

Cullen could hardly understand her. His mind had gone fuzzy as soon as she’d touched him. When she began sliding her palm slowly up and down his cock he knew she could ask him for anything and he’d promise it if only she’d keep touching him. 

 

She watched his eyes go dark. He was looking down at her, his lips parted slightly and his hand twitching at his side. She rolled her eyes and placed the hand in her hair. 

 

“Teach me,” she said huskily before lowering her mouth to the tip. 

 

Cullen groaned at the feel of her lips. She’d given him permission to move her but he hesitated. He didn’t want to hurt her and he might if he lost control. He’d held so tightly to his control for so many years. With this woman at his feet he wasn’t sure he’d be able to anymore. 

 

“Cullen,” she said, her voice cutting through the fog, “It’s okay.”

 

Her eyes were dark but focused, her lips rosy and parted. He didn’t need a second invitation. He started slowly, using her mouth for long strokes. As the pressure built, he moved faster, his hips jerking into the movement. She didn’t gag or cry out. He watched her face for signs of pain as he sped up but he only saw her fingers sneak between her legs. He didn’t want to finish here. He wanted her in his bed. He wanted to be inside of her. He pulled away with effort, panting. 

 

“Upstairs,” he said, “Now.” 

 

____

 

URSA laid out in Cullen’s bed, looking at the sky through the open rafters. He hadn’t fixed them. She liked it, happy that she could see the sky.  He had gone to get a condom and a damp towel, leaving her to lie in the haze of her pleasure. 

 

“ _ I love you,”  _ she thought, trying out the words. But she couldn’t say it now. It wouldn’t be fair. He’d pleasured her body and she knew if she said it now it would lessen it. She had to wait. He clicked off the light in the bathroom and padded back to the bed. She turned to look at his naked form, a smile slipping onto her face.

 

“You, Commander, are drop dead gorgeous,” she said. 

 

“I disagree,” he replied warmly, sliding onto the bed beside her. “That’s you.”

 

“Why can’t we both be?” she asked, swinging her leg over his hip. He rutted against her for a moment before responding. 

 

“We could, I suppose, but I still don’t agree. You’re the most beautiful creature in the world. I don’t stand a chance next to that,” he said. 

 

Ursa pushed him onto his back and crawled on top of him. “Let me prove it to you, then.” 

 

____

 

THEY’D been locked together for 30 minutes and Cullen now knew what heaven was like. The slide of her body against his. Her smell enveloping him. Her soft moans and high pitched squeals when he surprised her. She rode him at a steady pace, his hands on her hips and eyes on her face. She bit her lip as she rolled her whole body. Cullen had never seen anything like it. The scar on her chest caught the light and once more he saw how close he’d come to losing her. 

 

_ “I love you,”  _ he thought, tightening his hold on her hips and swinging her under him. He wouldn’t say it. Not yet. Not until the scent of their sex no longer lingered. Not until she would know he meant it not because of her body but because of her. 

 

She smiled up at him, hazy and hot, her nails latching onto his back. He pushed her wrists up and away, intertwining their fingers and pushing her arms into the bed. She laughed and whispered into his ear,

 

“Mark me.”

 

He took it to heart.


	10. 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa wakes up with Cullen. The war council discusses Calpurnia. Dyna decides to mate with Anscomb.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short chapter, but don't worry, the next will be back to the normal length.

Chapter 10

 

URSA had love bites all over. A sucked mark on her shoulder. One high on her neck. A red bite mark on the curve of her ass. Bruises on her hips from his hands holding her tightly. They’d made love and they’d fucked, the night a flurry of discovery. Slow touches bled into hard spanks and cries. She smiled at herself in the mirror, finally fully happy with how she looked. She combed her fingers through her hair, trying to settle the mess and laughing when it kinked again. It was early morning. She needed coffee and knew that they would need to discuss the Fade. She didn’t want to leave, though. She lingered in the bathroom, naked, until the cold seeped in from her feet. Her clothes were on his bedroom floor. He’d collected them in a moment of sweetness, telling her he didn’t want her to be caught without them in the morning. 

 

She’d slept in his arms and wished she could climb back in beside him but the day was already calling her. She sat on the edge of the bed to pull on her panties and bra as quietly as she could. She startled when Cullen jerked beside her, a mumbled cry of anguish pulling her attention. 

 

_____

 

THE world was dark here. He could see nothing. But he heard her. Smelled her. The scent of her skin mixed with blood. When his eyes could finally see, he cried out. The scar on her stomach was ripped anew. She drooped in Meredith’s arms, her left hand no longer glowing. She smelled of death. 

 

____

 

URSA leaned over him, pressing kisses to his face. He woke with a start, flying upward before realizing where he was. She retreated at the first shout, leaning back in as soon as he’d settled.

 

“Nightmare?” she asked, her fingers trailing down his chest. 

 

He looked at her for a beat before yanking her onto him. He inhaled deeply as he nodded, reminding himself that she was here. She was solid. She was alive. Between them, his pendent warmed from their skin. 

 

“Are you okay? Is it the lack of blood? I knew you shouldn’t have headed the charge,” she began. He put his finger on her lips, pushing her up once more so he could see her face. 

 

“I’m alright, don’t worry,” he said tenderly. Her hair was a mess around her head and he smoothed it back gently. 

 

“You could stand to let me worry about you,” she chided. 

 

“Alright,” he conceded with a laugh, “But only a little.” 

 

Her eyes softened. “Is it a good morning besides that?” she asked. 

 

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Yes,” he said with heartfelt honesty. 

 

Ursa  didn’t hesitate this time. She traced a finger along his jaw, finding his pulse and resting there. 

 

“I love you,” she said, “You know that, right?” 

 

He stared at her, delight in his gaze. The words made his heart fly. He’d given up on anything resembling a normal life. After the rebellion and his capture and then Meredith and her madness, he’d been broken. He had never dreamed anyone would want his shattered soul. He didn’t know if he deserved her love but she made him feel like he could. He smiled at her as he replied.

 

“I love you, too.” 

 

She smiled, tears in her eyes. Leaning in, she pressed her forehead to his. 

 

“God,” he managed to choke out, “I didn’t know there was anything like this. You…”

 

She cut him off, pressing a tender kiss to his lips. 

 

“I love you,” she said again, “I love you Cullen Rutherford, whether you think you deserve it or not. I love you and I won’t stop, ever. I found you here and I won’t let go. Not until you want me to.” 

 

He shuddered at the words, each time stealing a piece of his heart until she held it in her hand. He had given his soul away. He thought back to his schooling. A poem he’d liked and remembered. 

 

“We have given our hearts away,” he murmured.

 

“What?” she asked, threading her fingers in his hair. He pulled her hand to him, kissing her palm.

 

“Look it up,” he teased. 

 

She snorted and pulled her tank top on.

 

“You have to go,” he guessed.

 

“Yeah. Coffee. Work. Plans. The great life of the Inquisitor,” she said, regret in her voice. 

 

“Tonight?” he asked, raising his eyebrows. 

 

She grinned. “My bed this time.”

 

He nodded and watched her go. Lying back in his bed when she was gone, he thought about the night they had and smiled.

____

 

THERE was a round of applause when Ursa entered breakfast. It was led by Dorian and she was not surprised. 

 

“How did-” she started but he cut her off.

 

“You were not subtle. If you didn’t want everyone to know you shouldn’t have screamed his name  _ over and over  _ again,” he said dramatically. Ursa blushed, rolling her eyes. 

 

“It was that good?” Dorian prompted, preparing her coffee effortlessly. 

 

“Oh my god,” Ursa gushed. Dorian chuckled and leaned in. 

 

“Tell me  _ everything,”  _ he said. 

 

____

 

“ **_You shut me out last night,”_ ** Anscomb said as Cullen dressed. The dragon had returned when he’d been sure Ursa was gone. 

 

“I had to. You were right about being alone. I’m not anymore,” Cullen said, unable to stop the smile from spreading across his face.

 

**_“I’m not upset. She shut out Dyna, too. It seems you’re very evenly matched. I’m glad you two finally did something about it. Dyna and I were afraid we’d have to wait until she was 100 to mate,”_ ** Anscomb teased.

 

“You were waiting for us?” Cullen asked. 

 

“ **_Of course. A mate bond changes how the human riders feel about each other. We wanted you two to understand what you were to one another without that. Now when we mate your feelings will only grow stronger,”_ ** Anscomb said.

 

“Is that even possible?” Cullen asked, only half joking. 

 

Anscomb delved into Cullen’s memory, softening at his human’s feelings. Cullen was healing. Ursa had taken his heart and was sealing the open wounds, even if she didn’t know it. 

 

**_“Maybe not,”_ ** Anscomb said,  **_“She makes you feel safe. More than loved. It’s beautiful, Cullen. I’m so glad our path led us here.”_ **

 

Cullen finished dressing and smoothed down his armor. He had training first thing but first he needed coffee.

 

“I am too,” he replied to Anscomb, knowing the dragon would feel how fervently he meant it. 

 

_____

 

HIS men applauded when he entered the dining hall. Ursa was already sitting with Dorian, their heads pressed close together as they whispered. He flushed and headed to where Cassandra was sitting. 

 

“I have heard more about your prowess than I ever wanted to know,” she said in lieu of a greeting. 

 

Cullen peered over at Ursa once more. 

 

“And you’re not paying attention,” she said, “Which is fine until our meeting this afternoon.” 

 

“What?” Cullen asked, looking back at her. Cassandra sat back and sipped her coffee.

 

“You’re happy. Really happy,” she observed. 

 

“Is that so odd?” he asked. 

 

“For you? Yes. But it looks good on you. I’m almost jealous,” she said. 

 

Cullen chuckled. “You can’t have her,” he said.

 

“No,” Cassandra said thoughtfully, looking over to where Ursa was gesturing, green palm flashing. “No,  she’s yours, I think. Irrevocably.” 

 

Cullen beamed, missing Cassandra’s eye roll. She pushed a cup of coffee at him and groaned in disgust. He didn’t hear her, he was too busy watching the woman he loved smile.

 

____

 

“CALPURNIA,” Leliana started and waited until Ursa’s groan had subsided. “Calpurnia is not just a henchwoman. I had my people look into her. She’s been hunting the older rift spots. As I’m sure you know, Fade energy is strongest in the spots of old shrines. She’s been hunting those. From what I understand her next target is a very old elven ruin in Emprise Du Lion. We don’t know what she’s hoping to find but whatever it is, we can’t let her find it.”

 

Ursa’s face scrunched up. “Emprise Du Lion? Only ferals live there. The Glory has never managed to take that area.”

 

“Exactly. Fade energy is strong there. Stronger than any other place in our country. I can’t track them there, too dangerous, but it is the last border she crossed. There’s an old elven temple there. It’s in shambles. Historians have been fighting for decades to have it named a preserve but hardly anyone can reach it so the government refuses,” Leliana said. 

 

“And I need to go there,” Ursa sighed. “Of course I do. Because god forbid something good comes easily.” 

 

Cullen took her hand, linking their fingers. She smiled at the contact fleetingly before looking back at the map. 

 

“How am I supposed to get there?” she asked. 

 

“We’ve hired a guide. She’s been leading people through the forest there for years. Reputable and interested in helping us, as well,” Josephine supplied. 

 

“I don’t suppose she has a nice line of hotels on the way?” Ursa joked.

 

“And here I thought you liked camping,” Cullen replied, a smile on his face. She rolled her eyes, giving a wry smile in return. 

 

“I’m a little sick of it. Plus beds. They’re nice,” she said.  

 

Cullen’s eyes darkened slightly as he nodded. She laughed, turning back to the table. 

 

“Sorry,” she said to the three women watching. “You were saying?”

 

“No, by all means,” Leliana said, “You’re the talk of Skyhold. It’s interesting to see it firsthand.”

 

“We’re not fucking on this table for you,” Ursa warned, trying to keep her face straight. It lasted only a moment before she grinned widely, Dyna chuckling with her. 

 

Leliana gave her a vague smile. “I don’t need you to.”

 

“And on that terrifying note, can we get back to business?” Cullen asked. Ursa squeezed his hand. 

 

“Course, love,” she said, not thinking about the endearment as it passed her lips. She didn’t seem to catch it, even when the others startled at it and Cullen looked at her in surprise. 

 

“So where am I meeting this guide?” she asked, tapping stiff fingers across the map. 

 

“Um...at the line of the woods, here. The fields here are mostly open. Any dragon attacks can be seen and stopped. You’ll go with a guard detail until then. From there only you and your usual team will move forward,” Cassandra said, stumbling over her words. 

 

Ursa hummed. “Alright. When are we meeting her?” 

 

“As soon as possible,” Josephine said. 

 

“Which would be when?” Ursa prompted. They all looked at Cullen.

 

“I’ve organized a guard,” he said, “They’ll be ready by the end of the day.”

 

“Then all we need is for her to meet us. It will take me how long to get there?” Ursa asked, ticking her fingers across the map and counting. 

 

“A few days at least. You’ll have to hike most of the way. The area is very...rural,” Josephine said. 

 

“Okay. Give me two days to rest?” Ursa asked.

 

“Of course. After what you’ve been through I’m surprised you don’t ask for a week,” Josephine said, scribbling on a piece of paper.

 

Ursa looked over at Cullen. “I get restless knowing there’s something else to do,” she said, “Two days should suffice.” 

 

Cullen nodded. He wished she didn’t need to go but he understood. Her job took her away just as his kept him in one place. One day maybe they’d travel together. When the war was over and they could settle down. The rest of the meeting went quickly, each of them updating Ursa on the latest developments. When they were free to go the daylight was sinking away.

 

**“May I speak with my partner alone for a moment?”** Dyna asked Cullen as they exited the room. “ **She’ll be there for dinner.”**

 

“Of course,” Cullen said. He leaned in to kiss her lightly, ignoring those who paused to watch. She smiled into the kiss. 

 

“I’ll be there soon,” she promised. 

 

She watched him walk away, waiting until he’d turned the corner to look at Dyna. 

 

“What’s up?” she asked the dragon.

 

**_“Nothing bad. I just wanted to discuss something with you. It’s about Anscomb and me.”_ **

 

“Ah,” Ursa said, “Come on. I’ll go change for dinner and you can tell me about it.”

 

____

 

DORIAN found Cullen leaning on the wall by the dining hall. He leaned next to him. 

 

“Dorian,” Cullen greeted. He didn’t know Ursa’s friend that well but he liked what he saw. Dorian was a powerful rider. He helped the troops learn how to seat themselves and how to fly in combat. He also seemed to spend his free time reading or with Iron Bull’s mercenary team. Cullen had noticed his not so secret relationship with Krem and he’d enjoyed watching it grow. From what Ursa had told him of Dorian, the man deserved happiness. He wondered if now would be the time to extend a hand in friendship. His relationship with Ursa meant he’d be seeing the man more, he was sure. 

 

“I’m not going to pretend I could take you in a fight,” Dorian began, watching for Ursa as he spoke, “But I will say that if you hurt her, I will find a way to make sure you feel it too. She doesn’t like to talk about how she felt as a kid but I know. She’s never had anyone care for her. Not like you do. And I know you do. You’re so obvious the moon can probably tell, but I digress. You do anything to hurt her at all and I will make sure you feel that pain twice over. Okay?” 

 

Cullen blinked. He’d never received the threat speech. His brother had. From many friends and brothers of his girlfriends. Cullen had seen some of them but he’d never been privy to his own. He turned to Dorian.

 

“I’m...flattered,” he said, causing Dorian to blink.

 

“You’re...what?” Dorian asked in confusion.

 

“I’m flattered. You think she thinks strongly enough that I could hurt her. I wouldn’t, of course. Not on purpose, but thank you. And thank you for watching out for her. She tells me how you protect her out there,” Cullen said.

 

Dorian looked flustered. “Oh. Well. I….”

 

“You love her. I know. I do, too. I’m not going to hurt her. I’m not planning to ever leave her. You can watch me for the rest of your life if you’d like,” Cullen said.

 

“All that after one night?” Dorian asked, a grin crossing his face. 

 

“After nearly a year,” Cullen said seriously.

 

Dorian snorted. “Yes, a year in which you both ignored how you felt. How stupid of you. You could have done all of this so much sooner. Don’t be that dumb again, Commander.” 

 

Cullen smiled, looking down the hall to where Ursa was walking towards them, Dyna at her side. “I won’t,” he said.

 

“You know what?” Dorian sighed, seeing the light in Cullen’s eyes as he watched her, “I believe you.”

 

____

 

**_“Anscomb and I want to mate,”_ ** Dyna said without preamble. 

 

Ursa looked over as she wiggled her leggings up her hips.

 

“Okay,” she said. 

 

“ **_It would mean you’re bound to Cullen. Many riders end up with the human counterparts to their dragon’s mate. Our minds will all connect. We’ll be able to speak to each other. You and Cullen will too. It won’t just be fleeting or with an effort. It will be forever. However long we live, he’ll be a part of you,”_ ** Dyna warned. 

 

“Dyna, you know I slept with him. You know I told him I love him. None of that sounds bad,” Ursa said.

 

**_“If we do this and one of you dies…”_ ** This was what the dragon was worried about. Anscomb would be her mate, she knew it. But if they mated and one of their human’s died, they would all break. Ursa sucked in a breath.

 

“That won’t happen,” she said firmly.

 

**_“This isn’t over yet. You know we’ll have to face Corypheus before it’s through. He’s powerful and far older than us. I just don’t want you to ignore the possibility. If one of you dies, or one of us, we’ll all go mad with grief. I don’t want you to go into this blind. You’re happy, yes. And you’ll continue to be. I have no doubt that our mating will only add to your happiness with him. But what if the worst happens? Could you survive? Could he?”_ **

 

Ursa let herself think of it. She closed her eyes and pictured her life without Cullen in it. His things, dusty and unused in his office. His ceiling, open to the sky, with no one looking out it. His smile, gone. The smell of him clinging to his clothing until time had washed even that away. His laugh, warm in her ear, replaced by silence. A tear leaked out of her eye. Just the idea left her aching and hollow. She shook the image from her mind.

 

“It doesn’t matter,” she whispered. 

 

Dyna cocked her head and waited. 

 

“It doesn’t matter if you’re mated or not. If I lost him...I couldn’t survive it now. Mate with Anscomb. I would rather a week or even a day of blinding happiness than to have you never know it at its fullest. We won’t play it safe anymore. He and I waited too long to find one another, to say how we felt. You don’t need to make that mistake,” Ursa said more firmly. 

 

She wiped the tears away with the back of her hand and straightened her back.

 

“We can do it tonight. I’ll tell Josie I need more time here,” she said.

 

**_“I can’t ask that,”_ ** Dyna fretted, the words an ashen grey. 

 

“No, but I can. And I will. Three extra days. That’s all. We deserve that,” Ursa said. 

 

Dyna knew she couldn’t be swayed so she kept silent. She was gleeful. She would mate with Anscomb that evening under the evening sky. She could hardly wait. 

  
  
  



	11. 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dragons bond. Ursa sees the letter from Dorian's father.

Chapter 11

 

“HOW does this go?” Ursa asked over dinner. 

 

“How does what go?” Dorian asked. 

 

It was an eclectic group that sat at their table. Cassandra and Josephine had joined Cullen along with Dorian, Sera, and Krem on Ursa’s side. Conversations crossed the table and mixed social groups in a way that was unique to the Inquisition. Josephine thought this was their strength; so many different types of people working together to help one another. She’d said as much many times, having professional shots of them taken for newspapers and online sources. Ursa liked them best like this, though. Shouting across the table, reaching for food, goading Sera into throwing sugar cubes at Varric’s coffee on the other end of the long table. Her question caused the group to quiet as they waited for her to clarify what she’d meant. 

 

“A dragon mating. Do we go? Do we watch? What’s it like?” she asked. 

 

Sera smirked. “It’s like this, yeah? They get all windy and suddenly your mind explodes. I’ve heard it’s quite a trip. One girl tried it while smoking. She was whacked for days.” 

 

“It’s powerful. I’ve seen dragons after the fact. They can’t stand to be alone for a few days. Their humans feel it strongly, too,” Josephine added. 

 

“Are they doing it tonight?” Cullen asked.

 

‘I told Dyna to. Oh, Josie, I need a few more days in Skyhold. If they’re mated I won’t break them up so quickly, especially if it’s a normal part of the bond,” Ursa said. Her friend smiled back.

 

“I’d already planned a week. I was going to tell you later,” she said.

 

“You’re a lifesaver. And a mind reader. Which is a little creepy,” Ursa replied with a grin. Josephine preened at the praise. 

 

“I know,” she said. 

 

“Apparently you missed the “creepy” part,” Sera mumbled into her drink. 

 

Josephine only smiled serenely. 

 

“Anscomb and Dyna? You two were just meant to be together, weren’t you? First you, now your dragons. Looks like that speech was useless. Pity, I like a good grandstanding,” Dorian said. 

 

“Speech?” Ursa looked at Cullen. He patted her hand.

 

“It was nothing,” he promised. 

 

Dorian gagged theatrically, Krem chuckling beside him. 

 

“You two should stay far away from the main floor this time,” Cassandra said, causing them all to look at her. “I’ve heard a few matings in my time. The humans...they scream nearly as loud as their dragons. And it isn’t in pain.” 

 

“...oh,” Ursa said, blushing. 

 

“Cassandra!” Cullen chided. Cassandra shrugged. 

 

“It’s only the truth. Keep your doors locked and stuff some sheets under them. We’ll still hear it, but at least no one will be too bothered.” 

 

Josephine giggled behind her hand. 

 

“Tonight, then,” Cullen said. 

 

Ursa smiled. “Tonight,” she promised.

 

____

 

URSA was nervous and she couldn’t place why. She’d done every sordid thing she could think of the night before. Cullen had unleashed the part of her she hadn’t known she’d been hiding.She’d begged, screamed, and cried for him feeling no shame for any of it. Now she shifted her weight as she waited for him. Ursa lay out on her balcony, tail curled around her body.

 

**_“Stop it. You’re overthinking this. You two have already bound yourselves. This is for me and for Anscomb. You’ll be fine. You’ll probably be more than fine. My mother’s memories of mating are...well. You’ll be fine,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

“I know that,” Ursa said, wringing her hands. “Just…”

 

**_“What will you feel like afterwards? What will it be like to have him constantly in your head like I am. Yes, I wonder about that, too. Did you know twin dragons can be born? They’re linked upon birth so their riders, when chosen, are linked as well. Imagine that. Forever attached to three others, maybe even more if they decide to mate. We’ll see though, won’t we? I for one am excited,”_ ** Dyna said, settling her wings against her sides. 

 

“I am, too,” Ursa confessed. 

 

**_“I know you are. I’m in your thoughts, remember,”_ ** Dyna said in amusement. 

 

Ursa blew out a heavy breath, nodding. She bounced on her toes. 

 

**_“They’re at the stairs. Still time to turn back. You can tell me no and I’ll respect it,”_ ** Dyna said. 

 

Ursa shook her head. “No. You want this. So do I. It’ll be...it’ll be great.”

 

“I do hope so,” Cullen’s voice said warmly from the stairs. Ursa turned, her anxiousness melting into calm at the sight of him. 

 

**_“Was she second guessing?”_ ** Anscomb asked Delta silently. The green dragon shook her head.

 

“ **_No. Not really, just nervous,”_ ** Dyna replied. 

 

“ **_Not anymore. Look at them. Andraste’s fire, how have they not been like this since the first moment they met?”_ ** Anscomb cocked his head, watching Cullen smile at Ursa, his whole heart in his eyes. She looked back with utter devotion. 

 

**_“You didn’t like me at first. He didn’t like her either. Everything takes time,”_ ** Dyna said. She slid across the room, curling around Anscomb who purred at the contact. 

 

“So how does this go?” Ursa asked of the dragons.

 

**“We fly. We mate. You two will...feel it. Cassandra wasn’t wrong. It will be intense. Then we sleep. Our minds will bond in our dreams as they do when we first choose our partners. It should be quicker, though. One night, all of our minds. In the morning you’ll be able to hear each other. I should warn you, you will be hear random thoughts from one another until you learn to control it. It might be off putting at first,”** Anscomb said. 

 

“So no more need for cell phones,” Ursa joked. 

 

**“Mate bonds mean they can stretch as far as dragon speech can. The stronger the bond, the farther the reach. We should be able to hear you deep into Emprise Du Lion, though if you went beyond the Fade magic there we might struggle,”** Anscomb said. 

 

“So we’ll be able to speak with each other while she’s gone?” Cullen asked.

 

**“Yes. It should be fairly easy. You could also hear conversations you have with others and conversations Dyna and I share though you can also block it out the same way you would with us,”** Anscomb said. 

 

“Oh,” Cullen said, thinking about how his life was about to change.

 

“Are you still okay with this?” Ursa asked.

 

He looked down at her, startled she had to ask. “Yes, of course! Dragon’s talons, of course. I...I’m honored that you’re happy to bond your mind to mine.” 

 

_ “I’d bond myself to you fully  if you  asked,”  _ Ursa thought.

 

**_“Now that’s the type of thought you’ll have to watch once we’re bonded,”_ ** Dyna said teasingly. 

 

Ursa smiled, chagrined. “Okay, then. We’ll...get comfortable and you two will fly?” 

 

**“Yes,”** Anscomb said, his excitement flashing across Cullen’s mind. 

 

**“We’ll use the balcony to take off. Come with me,”** Dyna said. She led Anscomb away without looking back, leaving Ursa to take Cullen’s hand and pull him to the bed. 

 

“Why am I nervous?” he said mostly to himself. She climbed onto the bed beside him, laughing.

 

“I don’t know, but I am too. This is a big step for them, right? Maybe that’s why,” she offered. 

 

**_“You could ask her now. You want to,”_ ** Anscomb teased silently. Cullen shushed him. 

 

_ “It’s too soon. We’ve just gotten here,”  _ he said. 

 

“ **_Suite yourself. But she’ll see those dreams someday. You might want to ask before that,”_ ** Anscomb said, his voice growing softer as he concentrated on taking off. 

 

_ “Pay attention to your mate,”  _ Cullen huffed.

 

His dragon laughed, leaving his mind for the time being. When they took off, Ursa and Cullen felt the familiar swoop in their stomachs. Ursa gasped, falling against Cullen.

 

“I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to that feeling,” she said. 

 

“I’ve had it since I was 13 and it still feels odd when I’m not with him,” Cullen confessed. 

 

She looked up at him, her head on his chest, fingers curling in his shirt. Her face was open to him, emotion playing across it. It awed him that she would allow him into her mind. He knew most riders ended up with other riders and if their dragons mated they always had a bond with the other person. Most inevitably married the other rider. It was simply easier. Someone who knew you that well, who was in your mind, made anyone else seem inadequate. Cullen looked at her. He trailed his thumb along her cheek, watching her eyes flutter shut and her cheek lean into the touch. She responded to his every touch as if it were a gift. His breath caught in his throat as Anscomb’s voice sang and the dragon’s first touches reached him. He tightened his hold on her.

 

“I’m…” he couldn’t finish the thought, a powerful pull in his stomach causing his hips to jerk upward. 

 

“Oh….” she moaned breathily as the sensation reached her. Her hands tightened on him and she blindly threw her leg over him, sliding into his lap. 

 

She was above him for the first time, her hands on his shoulders and her breasts in his face. He peered up at her, lips parted. 

 

“I love you,” he said helplessly. Inside of him he could feel Anscomb’s flight, his excitement as he raced his new mate across the sky. 

 

Ursa smothered his face in kisses, her hips rolling slowly against his own.

 

“Ursa,” he said, catching her hands and stilling her movements. She looked down at him, lust in her gaze. Her eyes were hazy, Dyna’s emotions filling her own. With an effort, she focused on the man below her. She gasped as she saw him through Dyna’s eyes. The colors of his mind were beautiful. His soul glowed a bright red, specks of black covering the parts he thought of as broken. He was the lion of Kirkwall. He was the broken man in the cage. He was the lover who wept his release into her hair. Her love for him blazed. She smiled. 

 

“Ursa,” he said again, seeing the stillness in her, knowing that this time she heard him. 

 

“I know, love,” she said, tracing the scar on his lip gently, “I know. I feel it. It’s...you’re....”

 

“Beautiful,” he finished for her. She nodded, leaning in. The kiss was surprisingly gentle for how their bodies were reacting. Above them, Dyna let herself be caught. Ursa traced her tongue along his lips in the same pattern her dragon writhed in. He opened his mouth to allow her entry. He let her take control. The pendant of her necklace tapped against his chin.

 

“You still wear this,” he gasped when they broke apart, “I thought it was for the ball.”

 

She shook her head. “It’s yours. Like me. I want everyone to know it. To remember it. I want you to know it when you see me.”

 

Anscomb slid a talon along Dyna’s belly. Cullen’s cock jerked and Ursa whimpered, her nails scraping against his shoulders. 

 

“Oh my god,” she moaned. He could feel the heat from between her legs. He’d kissed her there the night before and he longed to again. He rolled her so he was lying over her. She smiled hazily at him, the purple sheets a contrast to her pale skin. 

 

“I want to taste you,” he told her. 

 

She bit her lip and nodded. He pushed down her shorts, giving her a wicked grin before nipping at her hip. She jerked at the touch, watching him with dark eyes. He pulled her panties down with his teeth, pleased when she moaned at the sight. He didn’t tease her this time, he couldn’t. In the sky, Anscomb had begun his mating of Dyna and their connection cause him to growl before burying his tongue in Ursa’s heat. 

 

Red blazed as she watched him. She dug her fingers into his hair, scraping his scalp. He only sucked harder. She cried out. 

 

_ “Cassandra was right…”  _ she thought fleetingly. Then his tongue slipped inside her again and she lost the thought. 

 

“You’re glowing,” he panted, his lips grazing her skin as he spoke.

 

“You are too. It’s beautiful,” she replied. She loosened her hold on his head, carding her fingers through the mussed mop of hair. 

 

“It’s...a plum color,” he said, watching it curl outwards from her body. “Is this how they see us?”

 

“Yes,” Ursa said. “You’re red, like the sunrise.” 

 

“You’re beautiful,” he said, his voice filled with a new appreciation. She smiled down at him. Despite her body’s need she wanted this moment. This discovery of one another. They’d spoken their need but now they could see it. With their dragons in the air they were stripped down to their very souls. She found him to be the most heart stopping thing she’d ever seen. Love coursed in her veins and she was sure it was flying off of her skin. He watched her with the same awe she was sure she watched him with. When another touch of their dragon’s scales sent them both trembling she whimpered with need and he surged up her body.

 

“I can’t wait,” he said desperately, “I’m sorry.” 

 

“No,” she said, pushing his shirt up with clumsy hands, “No, don’t be sorry. Just...I need you, please. Hurry.”

 

Her voice was breathless and needy, her hands cool on his heated skin. He couldn’t believe he had gotten so lucky. His life had broken only to give him this chance. He pulled his shirt off with fumbling hands before reaching down to help her push his pants down. She still wore her shirt as he settled between her opened legs. He gasped as another surge of emotion filled his veins. She pulled on her top, mewling when she couldn’t wriggle free. Hastily, he yanked it over her head. 

 

She wore no bra and once more he was faced with the red scar curving down her chest. He recalled his dream, her body pale and slumped in his commander’s arms. He shivered, pushing the thought away as she locked her legs around his waist and pulled him closer. 

 

_ “She’s here. She’s alive. She’s here. She’s here,”  _ he repeated to himself. 

 

Ursa touched his face as the tip of his cock breached her. 

 

“I can hear you,” she breathed. 

 

He looked down at her, shock filling his eyes. 

 

“I can hear you…” she repeated, pulling with her legs, her heels crossed over his back. He sank into her, their eyes locked on one another. He moved his hips slowly, savoring the hot slide of his cock inside her. He settled himself, buried to the hilt, and tried to hear her. 

 

“ _ Oh god...oh god. Don’t ever stop. Don’t. I couldn’t stand it. I love you. I love you,”  _ her thoughts were fleeting as they crossed his mind. He couldn’t tell if it was because of the newly built connection or because she was mindless to him but her words made him groan. He fell forward, pistoning his hips harshly. She cried out, digging her nails into his back hard enough to draw blood. 

 

“Yes, Yes,” she panted aloud, her mind echoing the same sentiment. He bit into the curve of her neck, marking her as he had the night before. Her nails drew blood from his skin and her cries only egged him on. As Dyna succumbed to her new mate, Ursa let herself drown in Cullen. His hand gripped her throat lightly, his body pressed hers into the mattress. She had never felt anything so glorious. Her words and thoughts were given freely, mixing with Dyna’s joy and Anscomb’s crisp cries. Together, the four reached a crescendo. 

 

Cullen felt only the stuttering glide of their bodies. He could focus only on their movements and her broken screams. She wept his name, her body wound so tightly he thought that when she broke it would shatter the walls around them. He too could feel his own release building just as Anscomb’s pleasure climbed. He kept moving. He couldn’t stop even if Corypheus himself fell from the sky. He needed her. Loved her. Worshiped her. 

 

_ “Andraste preserve me, she is my alter,”  _ he thought brokenly. 

 

“Yes,” Ursa sighed beneath him, shaking fingers touching his lips. “Yes.” 

 

He felt no shame in the thought and he marveled at that as his body began to move on its own. 

 

“Please, Cullen, please,” she begged. 

 

He only then realized he hadn’t put on a condom. 

 

“No!” she cried out on a sob, holding him tightly to her, her hips moving with his helplessly. “No, don’t pull out. Please. In me, please.” 

 

He knew it wasn’t safe. It wasn’t the time for them to have a child. They hadn’t even discussed such a thing. But he couldn’t stop now. She was holding him to her, grinding on him with every thrust. He was close to his release and she was nearing hers. There would be no stopping. With a shriek her body went taunt. It pulsed around him, milking his cock and causing his hips to stutter. He poured inside of her with a loud groan. Above them, Anscomb and Dyna wound around one another, drowsy happiness filling them all. Ursa clung to him, whimpering when he slid out of her gently. 

 

“Ursa..” he watched his seed seep out of her and onto the sheets, guilt starting to build.

 

“Don’t,” she said, shaking her head. “I’ll get the pill in the morning. It was worth it.”

He didn’t respond for a moment. Finally, he nodded. 

 

“You’re going to be bruised,” he said softly, touching the smooth skin of her thighs.

 

“I know. I like it,” she replied on a yawn. 

 

Cullen looked at the bathroom door. “It’s so far away,” he complained, loving the laugh it drew from her. She breathed deeply then swung her legs over the edge of the bed. She stood, wobbling for a moment before holding out her hand to him. He let her pull him to his feet. She began to walk, nonchalant in her nakedness. Despite his exhaustion and his body’s flagging excitement, he felt a stir watching her hips swing. He stepped close and yanked her back against his naked chest. She laughed warmly. 

 

“We should dance like this sometime,” he said into her ear.

 

“Oh?” she said in amusement. “I didn’t think you liked dancing.”

 

“I could be persuaded to like it. If you wore only this.” He flicked the pendant around her neck. She spun in his arms, sleepy satisfaction on her face.

 

“You’re possessive,” she observed. 

 

“And you like to be possessed,” he responded. 

 

“Maybe,” she flirted.

 

“You can’t be coy while naked,” Cullen chuckled, “It takes away from the act.” 

 

She hmphed playfully, pushing against his chest. “Are you ruining my fun, Commander? What a shame.”

 

He kissed her cheek gently. “No, I wouldn’t dream of it, darling.”

 

“Darling?” she asked, her eyes lighting with laughter.

 

“Yes. I like it. Would you like something else instead? You didn’t ask my opinion but I am partial to your choice,” he said. 

 

“What choice?” she asked.

 

“You called me love. At the table today. I wasn’t sure you noticed,” he said. 

 

She blushed. “Oh. I didn’t...I’m sorry.”

 

“Don’t be. I liked it,” he dismissed. 

 

“Okay then. I like darling, if I’m allowed to choose,” she said, pulling him with her towards the bathroom. “Now let’s shower. They won’t be back for over an hour yet, I bet. And my bathtub is huge.” 

 

____

 

THEY all fell asleep together. Dyna with her head on Ursa’s stomach and Anscomb curled around Cullen’s legs. The dreams came as soon as they closed their eyes. 

 

____

 

THE Fade was bright here. Dyna could feel its energy thrumming. She could fly here. She could run. She could become what her ancestors had been born of. Instead she stayed grounded. She didn’t look too hard at the golden dragon above her. She listened, taking to hear the lesson she could teach. Through her eyes, they all saw what could be. With that final revelation, the dream melted away. 

 

___

 

URSA’S bedroom was small at the Keep but she didn’t mind. Contentment flooded the memory as she danced around the room, headphones plugged into her ears. She didn’t hear the door open, only memory let them all see. Three Dalish girls, blonde and waspishly thin, unkind smirks on their faces, stood in the doorway. 

 

“Look at her,” one said so Ursa paused in her movements. 

 

“Her grandad fucked some city girl. It’s too bad, really. She could’ve been pretty,” the girl said. Ursa’s head began to hang. Within the dream Cullen felt a flare of anger. Ursa was beautiful. No one should have ever made her feel like she wasn’t. He wanted to move but the dream melted into another memory. Ursa, on her hands and knees calmly polishing an egg.

 

“And you’ll wake up here, find your rider, and live your life just as you’ve planned,” she crooned. “It must be nice. To know who you are and what you’re meant to be. I wish I had that. Uncertainty is the worst part of being human.” 

 

She sighed wistfully, her thoughts pulling them to one more scene. She was lying on the roof of the Keep, eyelids sinking shut. Suddenly, cool lips touched her own, causing her to startle. She opened her eyes widely. Dorian was leaning over her. He sat up. They stared at one another. His breath smelled like vodka and he looked pensive. There was doubt in his eyes. 

 

“Dorian, what…” she asked, touching her mouth. 

 

“I wanted to see,” he said, vulnerability tipping his lips downward. She kept her eyes locked on his as she absorbed that.

 

“Well then that wasn’t much to go on,” she said after a moment. She reached for him, pulling him gently to her. He sucked in a breath, freezing as she pressed her lips to his. It wasn’t a good kiss. No spark or gasping realization, but it wasn’t for her it was for him. She patiently opened her mouth and waited for him to do the same. He did hesitantly and the kiss carried on. It lasted minutes. When he pulled back she smiled gently.

 

“Well?” she said, already knowing what the answer would be. 

 

“No,” he said shaking his head. 

 

“It’s okay,” she said with a shrug.

 

“It’s not,” Dorian said, his voice breaking. 

 

“Dorian, it is. Your father...it is fine. It’s okay. It doesn’t change who you are. I love you,” she told him gently, knowing that pushing too hard would cause him to break.

 

The memory began to fade as Dorian’s eyes filled with tears. The last thing they felt was Ursa pulling her friend to her, cradling him as he sobbed. 

 

____

 

ANSCOMB came next. He dreamt of the day they’d been freed from Kirkwall. Relief flooding him even as worry gnawed at his spine. Cullen was silent. He nudged the man with his nose.

 

**_“We’re free,”_ ** he said cautiously.

 

“We’ll never be free again. Not after this,” Cullen said, his voice dull. Ursa’s anguish at the memory mixed with Anscomb’s own feelings of despair. She curled closer to him in her sleep. 

 

**_“We will. Come on. Let’s go,”_ ** Anscomb coaxed. 

 

As he led Cullen out of the dirty cell the dream changed. They were in Haven. The night of the fight. The night Ursa had nearly lost her life. Everyone was running and screaming. Anscomb watched the sky. Dyna was there, protecting the people. Anscomb wasn’t even sure Ursa knew, she was too busy running to help the humans on the ground. Anscomb watched, in awe of the majestic creature who soared despite the battle around her. There was joy in Dyna. A primal feeling of bloodlust most dragons fought. She didn’t. He watched her shoot a dragon down with no remorse, moving on with a simple snort. 

 

He wanted her. With a push off the ground he joined her in the fight, her joy spreading to him until war became a game. Below them the world burned and above them, the stars cheered. Anscomb’s sense of pride led them to their final shared dream, the sky melting away. 

 

____

 

CULLEN was last. His memories were tinted grey, giving them a sense of dreariness that put Ursa on edge. First they saw his most terrible dream. Meredith, bloodied and cruel, tearing through friends that had once stood at Cullen’s side. He shivered in his sleep, lying still only when Ursa’s body pressed against his own. 

 

They followed her on her rampage, wincing at each new kill. Then they saw Ursa. She turned, green light burning in her eyes. Ursa found it off putting to look at her own face in such a way. She cocked her head as her body stepped forward, green palm rising. 

 

Meredith cut her down. A hooked dragon claw sliced down the line of Ursa’s scar, ripping her open. She gagged and Cullen cried out, scrambling on the tiles but unable to reach her. She bled to death there, slumped in Meredith’s arms while the woman laughed. Ursa’s anguish sunk into them all. Collectively, they huddled closer together.

 

Ursa nearly sighed in relief when the dream changed. It was snowy and Cullen’s eyes hurt from looking into the white drifts. Ursa knew without prying into his mind that this was the night he’d pulled her from the snow. Time warped around them and skipped to when he saw her. She looked terrible. She was too pale, blood staining her leg and mouth. There was ice in her hair and she whimpered when he lifted her. Panic overtook him, the memory still hurting him even now. He laid beside her, not daring to sleep in case she died in the night. Ursa felt her love for him swell during this. His own thoughts were a jumble of prayers. The dream melted to another memory, this one more recent. 

 

She was running to him, the joy alight on her face. He couldn’t look away. This woman, this incredible woman, had called his name with such unashamed happiness. She was running to him like she couldn’t stand to not be near him. Something in his chest sealed at that moment. A wound he hadn’t known was still bleeding. When he caught her, he knew. He loved her. It had been inevitable from the moment she’d walked onto the field near Haven. There was a sense of fate in the memory. His arms wrapped around her slowly, more slowly than it had happened but this was his dream and he wished to remember it. Looking down at her he felt at home. The dream faded to that thought, morning light beginning to rouse them. 

 

Ursa’s eyes fluttered open and she made a sound of contentment. 

 

“I could get used to waking up like this,” she said.

 

Cullen rolled onto his side to face her. “I’m sorry,” he said.

 

‘For what?” she asked, running her fingers over the stubble on his cheek.

 

“That dream. It’s just a nightmare. I didn’t mean to share it,” he said. 

 

“Cullen,” she said, his name a tender prayer on her lips, “I would take them all from you if it meant helping you. Meredith is dead. I’m not going anywhere. I will take all your nightmares as long as you’re here in the morning.” 

 

He looked down, fingers twining with hers, before speaking. “Dorian.”

 

Ursa shook her head. “His story isn’t mine to tell. That memory...it was nothing.” 

 

“It didn’t look like nothing. Did his father...hurt him?” Cullen asked, hesitating. He knew of Pavus, the head of the Tevinter Keep. He was known to be cold but most said he loved his children. There seemed to be one exception. 

 

“No. Not like you’re thinking. But some wounds run deeper. You know that,” Ursa said softly. 

 

Cullen nodded. 

 

“I’ll never leave him behind. You know that, right? Dorian...we saved each other. I could never leave him,” Ursa pleaded with him to understand. 

 

Cullen kissed her knuckles one at a time. “I would never ask you to,” he said finally. She smiled, nodding.

 

“Okay,” she said, “Okay.”

 

____

 

“DO you think they had a good night?” Dorian asked Krem. They were in Dorian’s bed, their dragons asleep on the floor. Krem had his head on Dorian’s chest and was tracing the trail of dark hair down Dorian’s stomach.

 

“I think they had a better night than most,” Krem replied.

 

“Better than us?” Dorian asked incredulously. 

 

Krem looked up with a smirk. “Maybe not.” 

 

“I for one would enjoy a better morning,” Dorian mused. Krem chuckled, pushing himself up to straddle Dorian. 

 

“I’m listening,” he said. 

 

____

 

THE four couldn’t bear to be separated. Cullen could hardly step away from Ursa long enough for them to dress. He took her hand immediately after, keeping it clasped in his own as they descended the stairs. Unlike the morning before, the people around them pretended not to stare. Nobody cheered, they only watched as the newly mated set made their way to breakfast.

 

“I might have preferred the clapping,” Cullen admitted quietly. 

 

“We could sit with Leliana. I’m sure you’ll get your applause then,” Ursa replied.

 

Cullen shook his head so quickly that Ursa laughed. 

 

_ “Dragon’s talons she’s beautiful. The most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. How could I not believe in god after seeing her?”  _

 

Cullen’s thoughts came to Ursa without her asking and she blushed at them, looking up at him softly. 

 

“Is that what you think?” she asked. 

 

“What?” he replied in surprise. 

 

“Nevermind,” she said, biting her lip and pulling on his hand. 

 

**_“She hears you,”_ ** Anscomb explained, “ **_Your thoughts are hers now. She doesn’t fully know how you see her. But she will.”_ **

 

Cullen blushed a deep red. “That will...take some getting used to,” he said. 

 

Ursa laughed, bringing his hand to her lips as they entered the dining hall. There was no applause but everyone was staring. The Inquisitor, their Herald, and her lion side by side and unashamed. And it was at that point that the day began to go downhill.

 

____

 

A woman by the name of Giselle approached Ursa as they sat to eat. She held a letter in her hands. Ursa’s eyes flicked to it.

 

“Unless that’s a matter of life and death I beg you, please, leave me alone,” she said. 

 

“It might be, your grace,” the woman said. 

 

She had been recruited back in Haven as a nurse. Her faith carried her through, she said, and she’d made it through the dark night that had brought them to Skyhold. Now, she shifted her weight uncomfortably as Ursa decided what to do. With a heavy sigh, she held out her hand. 

 

“It’s a letter from Mr. Pavus. The dragon rider’s father. He...he contacted me to plead with his son to come home. Please, your grace, get your friend to this tavern. There will be a driver to pick him up. His father is distraught,” Giselle said. 

 

Ursa dropped the letter, shock on her face.

 

“He wants Dorian home? Why?” she asked, then realized. “He doesn’t like me. He never did. Now I stand for everything he wishes to see fail. Of course. He’s ashamed. His estranged son has run away to essentially join the circus so now he pulls on the leash.” 

 

“Don’t tell him, your grace. It’s for his own good. Get him there. The man is only looking out for his son. Surely you can understand that,” Giselle pleaded. 

 

Ursa scowled.

 

_ “...old woman knows nothing. Stupid. Dorian can’t go home. That will kill him.”  _

 

Cullen choked on his coffee as her thoughts crossed his mind. He wiped his mouth and stayed quiet, curious as to how Ursa would handle this. 

 

She leaned forward. “I will tell him exactly what this says. I won’t lie to my  _ best friend.  _ And if you have a problem with Dorian, you are free to leave. He’s paid his dues more than many of the people here. Do you understand me?” 

 

Giselle flinched. “Yes. Your Grace,” she said slowly. 

 

“Good. Now go away. I was having a nice morning until you got here,” Ursa said, waving her hand. Giselle hurried out of the dining hall. Ursa looked down at the letter and sighed. 

 

“This was such a good morning,” she said mournfully.

 

“You don’t need to tell him,” Cullen offered. She shook her head, her denial crossing his mind before she spoke.

 

“I do. It’s not fair to hide it. He should know. Maybe he should even meet with this driver. He needs closure and he’s not going to get it without talking to his dad,” she sighed. She rubbed her temple. 

 

“I’ll go with you,” Cullen offered. She looked up at him with a small smile.

 

“ _ He’s so fucking perfect...and he loves me. The world is odd,”  _ she thought. When his face changed she knew he’d heard it. She laughed self consciously. 

 

“That is going to take some getting used to. No, thank you, but no. I’ll go with him. We’ll see this through,” she said. 

 

“I…” Cullen trailed off. There were so many people around. He sighed and then concentrated on his thoughts. He tried to pass them to her. Anscomb explained it gently, Dyna’s voice joining his. Finally, Cullen felt her mind open and he deliberately spoke.

 

“ _ I don’t know if I can bear to watch you walk away today,”  _ he confessed. She blushed, biting her lip.

 

_ “I know. But I have to. I have to leave in a few days. If I don’t do this now, he might never know,”  _ she replied.

 

Cullen nodded. He leaned in, kissing her neck softly. She smiled and then jumped when Dorian plopped into the seat across from them. The dragons greeted Audri with friendly hisses. Their conversation became a soft buzz in the back of their rider’s minds. 

 

“Morning,” Dorian said cheerfully. 

 

“Ask. I know you want to,” Ursa said. 

 

Dorian laughed. “Alright. How was it? Are you all bonded now? Is it just amazing?” 

 

“It was fantastic, yes we are, and I’d say so. I’m not sure how everyone else feels,” Ursa replied, feeling a resounding yes from all three of those bound to her before she’d finished speaking. 

 

“Oh now. I’d say you’re all pretty happy,” Dorian said, sneaking a glance at Cullen. “Love suits you, Commander. May I say you’ve never looked so relaxed or well fucked. Now all you need is a ring on your finger. Trust me. You look like that, you’re going to want it. Fend them off early. Besides, you’ve marked her. Quite well, I see.” 

 

“Dorian!” Ursa hissed. 

 

_ “I’d have to find one in this godforsaken place...maybe Josephine would know of one…”  _

 

Ursa turned red as Cullen’s thoughts touched her mind. He stuttered. “I didn’t mean! Dragon’s talons…” 

 

“We haven’t discussed it,” Ursa said forcefully to Dorian. 

 

“Well you should,” Dorian said jovially. 

 

“Dorian,” Ursa groaned. The letter sat between them on the table and he lifted it idly. 

 

“What’s this? More Inquisition business?” he asked. 

 

“Dorian, no,” Ursa said, reaching for it but it was too late. He’d seen his name. He leaned away from her grasping hand and flipped it open. He read quickly, his smile falling as he understood. 

 

“Dorian…” Ursa reached for his hand. He turned his palm up, grasping her wrist tightly. 

 

“I...I have to go, don’t I? Even just to see. What he has to say,” he said quietly. “I haven’t seen him in over a year now. Maybe…”

 

“I’ll go with you,” Ursa said firmly. 

 

Dorian looked up shakily. He nodded. He then looked at Cullen. “I’m afraid I’m going to have to steal her, Commander. But have no fear. I know I’m irresistible but this is business,” he tried to joke feebly. 

 

Cullen nodded. “I’m sure you’ll give me a run for my money,” he replied. 

 

Dorian gave him a grateful smile. “When do we leave?” he asked. 

 

“When you’re ready,” Ursa said easily. “This says he’ll be there all day today and tomorrow. I figure the sooner the better.” 

 

Dorian nodded, blowing out a sigh. “Alright. Let me get some coffee then we can hit the road. I’d rather do this fast.”

 

Ursa nodded. “I’m here. I’ll be here no matter what,” she promised.

 

“I know,” he said, “You always have been. I don’t see why that would change now.” 

 

“I love you,” Ursa said to her friend. She squeezed Cullen’s hand underneath the table. He could feel her worry. Squeezing back, he stood. 

 

“You need to do this. I’ll take care of everything here,” he said.

 

“I know you will,” Ursa said with a smile. “Thank you.”

 

He leaned down to kiss the top of her head.

  
_“Anything for you,”_ he thought. As he strode away he marveled at how true those words were. 


	12. 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa and Dorian speak to his father. Ursa lets Cullen into her mind. He does the same. Solas has too much information for just an academic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is nearly over! Few more chapters and I'll be done. I can't believe I've written this so fast. I'll probably go through it at some point to edit the mistakes I missed but yay! This has been (and will continue to be) such a fun journey. Thanks for sticking with it.

Chapter 12

  
  


DORIAN shifted nervously in the car as they drove. Ursa peeked over at him.

 

“Are you alright?” she asked softly. It was a stupid question and she knew it. Of course he wasn’t. It was a testament to how badly he did feel that he only shook his head. 

 

“I can turn around. We don’t have to do this,” she offered. 

 

“No,” he said, “I need to do this. I need to know...it’s stupid to think anything’s changed but if I don’t see for myself…”

 

Ursa reached over and took his hand. He massaged her fingers absently, working the stiffness out of the scar tissue. 

 

“I love Cullen,” she said after a few minutes of quiet, “But you’re the other piece of my soul. You know that, right?” 

 

Dorian squeezed her hand briefly before returning to his ministrations. 

 

“I know. It’s the same for me. I’m sticking with what I said before. If you had a dick you’d be the love of my life,” he said, chuckling quietly.

 

“I can still be the love of your life,” Ursa retorted with a snort. 

 

“True,” he replied. “Alright then. You’re the love of my life. Krem is just my boy toy.”

 

She laughed. “Good. Tell him that. Preferably when I can watch. I get so little fun these days.” 

 

Dorian winced so she laughed harder. When he smiled she curled her fingers around his own. 

 

“Good,” she said in satisfaction, “You aren’t Dorian without your smile. I was beginning to worry Corypheus had replaced you with some sort of clone.” 

 

“Maybe he did,” Dorian replied, waggling his eyebrows. Ursa laughed, shoving his head gently. He ducked under the push, sticking his tongue out. 

 

Slowly their laughter died out and once more they watched the road.

 

“Thanks,” Dorian said into the silence. Ursa smiled briefly and patted his knee. They drove the rest of the way in silence. 

 

____

 

THE pub wasn’t crowded. When they entered they both immediately noticed Dorian’s father standing by the bar. He looked out of place, a frown on his face.

 

“So the driver was a lie,” Dorian said in disgust. 

 

“You told him,” the older man said, looking Ursa over with thinly veiled distaste. She crossed her arms, her left hand snapping green light across her chest. 

 

“Of course I did. I don’t know what you expected,” she retorted.

 

“I had hoped this...new position would have given you a sense of decorum,” he said. 

 

Ursa’s lips twisted into a tight smile. “Sadly, no. I’ve only tainted your son that much more, I’m sure.”

 

“Ursa,” Dorian said. He wasn’t chiding her, he was asking her to step back. It was clear his father didn’t understand him at all when the older man smiled at the word. He thought Dorian was commanding Ursa to stop and that her silence was a sign of humiliation, not respect. When she settled back into her heels, he took it to mean something worse. 

 

“Brought to heel by a rider. How does the Inquisition do it? First a sordid tale of affairs in the ranks and now this. Tell me, Inquisitor, how is it having a real man warm your bed?” 

 

Ursa snarled and stalked across the room, stopping only when Dorian caught her arm. 

 

“Ursa, don’t,” he said lowly. 

 

“How  _ dare you _ speak about Dorian like that? He’s more of a man than you’ll ever be. Cullen is not a  _ replacement for your son,”  _ she hissed, stumbling as Dorian pulled her back.

 

“Don’t,” he said, “It’s okay. Father, what brought you here? It couldn’t be just to antagonize Ursa.” 

 

Ursa stepped back and glared. Dorian stared at his father. He no longer had hope that the man had come to apologize. He just needed to hear the words. He needed to know for good that his father wanted the ideal, not the man. 

 

“I came to bring you home,” his father said, a manufactured look of softness passing his face. “We miss you. You need to come home.”

 

Ursa looked at Dorian, nodding slightly when he tipped his head. She stayed quiet. 

 

“You don’t miss me,” he said, his voice shaking. “You don’t want people to know I’m working with the Inquisition. Tevinter still sides with the Glory, doesn’t it? How bad must it look that I’m here while you’re standing beside a failing empire?”

 

“Your mother misses you. The dragons ask for Audri daily-” 

 

Dorian snarled. “They miss Audri? Audri who you would’ve taken from me? You...you wanted to  _ change  _ me. You wanted to make me more normal and you tried…” his voice broke and he shook his head. Ursa stepped up, taking his arm.

 

“Let’s go,” she said softly. He nodded, turning away from his father for the last time. The other man didn’t protest, only watched them go. When they’d climbed into the car and Ursa started the engine, Dorian began to cry. She gripped his hand and began to drive. 

 

Halfway back to Skyhold she pulled over. His tears had stained his shirt and she could wait no longer. She lunged across the seat to hug him. He clung to her, once again the young man who didn’t know how to make his father love him. She stroked his hair, his pain becoming her own.

 

**_“Do you need us to come to you?”_ ** Dyna asked, her voice colored with Anscomb’s concern and Cullen’s worry. 

 

_ “No,”  _ Ursa replied, handing along her gratitude at their concern, “ _ We can deal with this. I’m sure Audri is already waiting.” _

 

**_“She is. She’s nearly crawling the walls. Okay. We’re here, if you need us,”_ ** Dyna replied.

 

Ursa sent along wordless thanks. Dorian’s head was buried in the curve of her shoulder. Ursa marveled at how different things had become. He used to rest his head there whenever it felt too heavy but lately she’d been leaning on him more. She kissed his temple gently. 

 

“He’s wrong. He’s always been wrong. You’re perfect as you are. Don’t let him take your happiness,” she said fiercely. 

 

Dorian sniffled. “I’m sorry he was so rude to you,” he said.

 

Ursa huffed. “He wasn’t. He was rude  _ to you.  _ I really couldn’t care less what your father thinks of me. But...what he said about you, about Cullen? I could’ve killed him.” 

 

“He always knew what people thought. The desperate girl, pegging the sad, gay, rider just so they could feel something. I’m sure he believed it. He always thought the worst of me and of you, for caring so much. He must think you’re crazy. Keeping me around when you have so much power. And now? You’re sleeping with your Commander. The second hand shame must be killing him. To admit I’m here, second fiddle to a low born military man no less, must haunt him at night,” Dorian said. He pulled away and looked at Ursa’s calm face. He traced his finger along the tattoo on her face. “You called this a mark of a person you don’t feel like you are. What about now?”

 

Ursa looked past him. She knew the others were listening. Her thoughts were no longer fully private and with a deep breath, she opened the doors to who she’d been. She allowed Cullen to see who she was before Haven. Her embarrassment. Her drinking to numb herself. The way the rumors began to slide off of her because she no longer cared. She’d clung to Dorian as the only person to truly make her feel alive. As Cullen sorted through her thoughts, she turned her attention back to Dorian. He still had his finger on her cheek, curling it back and forth along the roots of the tree. 

 

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “I’m not a Herald. Not even close. Andraste showed us what happened at the Conclave. She chose me, but not for any greater purpose. But no matter what got me here, I can’t say it hasn’t changed me.”

 

“You’re more comfortable in your own skin. It began right away,” Dorian observed. “I was scared for you. They could have ripped you apart but I’m afraid even I misjudged you.” 

 

“It’s okay. I misjudged myself. If you told me on that day in Haven that I’d be  _ here  _ I would’ve laughed at you. Hard,” Ursa said, sitting back and starting the car again. Dorian chuckled, wiping his eyes on his sleeve. 

 

“Yes, I see it now. I tell you that you’ve admitted your love for the gorgeous man in the armor. That you now run this whole operation and that all of the country not under the Glory’s thumb loves you. No one calls you knife ear. No one tells you, you aren’t the perfect Dalish girl. You kill things with frankly brutal efficiency. Oh, and you have a bonded dragon with a new mate. Yes, I could see you thinking I was nuts,” he said. 

 

“When you say it, it sounds even crazier,” she laughed. 

 

“You’re telling me. My best friend, sorry, the love of my life, is the most powerful political influence in the last 100 years. People listen when she talks so now they listen to me. I have soldiers asking me for help.  _ Soldiers.  _ A templar asked Audri to show him her electric shock so he could work on his energy channeling. I have my own room for the first time in 10 years...the possibilities of this are endless,” he said. 

 

“And you use it to get the best wines first,” Ursa chuckled.

 

“What else would I possibly use it for?” he asked. He reclined his seat and Ursa relaxed. He would be okay. She watched the road for the rest of the drive, a comfortable silence settling over them both. 

 

___

 

CULLEN had fallen into a near stupor when Ursa had opened her mind fully to him. He’d crashed to the floor, Cassandra crying out in worry and running to him. He couldn’t respond. There was too much of her in his mind, his curiosity aided by Dyna. She steered him easily into the memories. She was seeing some of them for the first time as well. Times of discontent wound with a sense of numbness in Ursa’s mind. She’d been hurting more than she’d let anyone see. Her only bright memories were with Dorian and sometimes Sera, her world alight for brief moments. 

 

Cassandra pulled him to his feet, relaxing when Anscomb explained. She helped lead him back to his office, sitting him in his chair as he stared numbly into the distance. 

 

“Is this...normal?” she asked. She waved her hand in front of Cullen’s face. He didn’t move.

 

**“It is if a partner opens their mind completely. It doesn’t happen often. Most partners don’t give that much of themselves. Many fear if someone could see all of them they would be lost. If someone knows all of you, are you even you anymore? Humans fear much when it comes to their minds,”** Anscomb said. He was as surprised as Cassandra but for a different reason. 

 

They’d all felt Ursa’s anger and then her anxiety. They’d been helpless to do anything but respond. She’d told them no when they’d offered to come get her but had opened her mind without hesitation. Anscomb had memories of many bonds. His mother, her mother, some of his older siblings, but none had offered themselves so selflessly and easily. Ursa had handed everything to them without so much as a doubt. Cullen had much to view, her mind suddenly an open book. He worked his way through. The fear at the rifts. Her worry for him when Andraste told her of him on the front lines. Then farther back. The numbness of life at the Keep. Sorrow at watching dragons pass her by. A shamed child who looked more like her grandmother than her parents. Locked doors and mud flung at her face. The tattoo she’d chosen to remind herself that a tree could still be beautiful with sour roots. The thoughts and memories kept coming, a never ending flood of the woman Cullen had chosen to love. 

 

He couldn’t feel the tears on his cheeks. In her memories he only wished to wipe hers away.

 

_ “Arugh!” Ursa screamed, throwing the glass at the wall with all her strength. It shattered, giving her a moment of fierce satisfaction before the misery seeped in again. She stumbled back until she slammed into the wall. Sliding down, she held her knees. Tears dripped down her face as the sobs were ripped from her chest.  _

 

_ “Broken...stupid of me to think…” she hiccupped between words. The door flew open. Her eyes shot up, ready to scream at whoever disturbed her. Dorian stood there. He was still wearing his coat. It looked like he had run through the Keep, his chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath. _

 

_ “You heard,” she said bitterly.  _

 

_ “I might have punched him in the nose. More than once,” he admitted.  _

 

_ “How could I have been such an idiot?” she asked wretchedly. Dorian pulled off his jacket and stepped over the pieces of glass.  _

 

_ “You weren’t. He said all the right things. He was an asshole and he took advantage,” Dorian said. Ursa nearly recoiled from his touch as he sat beside her. It took a deep breath and a reminder of who it was for her to lean into him.  _

 

_ “Yeah, I fucked her. I’m not usually one for sloppy seconds but damn, that ponce had it right. She’s loud, too. Those city girls. They sure know how to give it,” she mimicked, twisting her fingers around her right wrist roughly.  _

 

_ Dorian took her hands. “He’s scum. Not you. Someday...someday you’ll find someone. Someone will see you for who you are. You won’t be some conquest.” _

 

_ “Not if I never get to leave here. I’ll never be more than the mixed breed. The one they fuck with but never keep around,” she said bitterly.  _

 

_ “So we’ll leave. I’ll get away from Tevinter and you from here. We’ll go somewhere new. Have adventures. Audri could fly us all the way to America if we wanted,” he said, struck by the dream as much as she was.  _

 

_ She gave him a watery smile, leaning her head on his shoulder. “Someday you’ll find someone, too. It can’t always be this bad.”  _

 

_ Dorian linked their fingers. “No,” he said, “No, it can’t.”  _

 

Cullen blinked, a sour taste in his mouth. He could still see the boy’s face. The smug smile as he boasted at taking her virginity. He felt her burning embarrassment, her humiliation that had caused her to drink herself to sickness. He was angry for her, furious at the man who had used her so badly. It hadn’t ended there. She’d been the butt of jokes, the source of ridicule and the one no one took seriously. He wanted her home so he could hold her. Now more than ever he wanted to show her what she meant to him. She wasn’t a conquest or a joke. He didn’t love her for the power and status she could now offer. Shaking his head, he let himself see more. 

 

Her arms wide as she stood on the roof of the Keep, enjoying the freedom the wind brought. Sliding in her socks across the hallway floor with Sera, giggling as the other woman fell. Crying when an egg didn’t hatch and carefully sealing it so the mother could hold it forever. Holding Dorian after he’d thrown up all he’d had to drink and the world had returned to him. Watching the sun rise during the first snow of the season. Then he came to himself in her mind, inspecting the way she saw him. He felt himself go still. Her first thoughts were of envy. How beautiful, how collected, how strong he seemed. Her own doubt in herself weighed heavily in those first days. She’d taken each of his silences to mean he disliked her, didn’t trust her, when it had meant the opposite. He reached out to her, pulling himself from her mind with a struggle.

 

“ _ Hello, love,”  _ she greeted him warmly. Their connection felt effortless now, like she’d always been just a thought away.

 

“ _ I love you,”  _ he said. 

 

“ _ I love you too. We’re nearly home. Are you alright? You seem...off,”  _ her concern hummed in his mind. He slumped back.

 

“ _ I’m fine. I just...I miss you.” _

 

_ “I miss you too. Nearly there then three more days. Just us. Imagine the luxury of it,”  _ she said, happiness warming him through her. He nearly sighed aloud. 

 

“ _ Are you sure you’re okay? You’re feeling very...morose,”  _ she commented. If he concentrated he could feel her hands on the steering wheel. He could hear Dorian humming to the radio. He could taste the wind from her cracked window. 

 

_ “I’m fine,”  _ he said again. She nodded. 

 

_ “Alright. 10 minutes. If I speed the rest of the way,”  _ she said. He pulled away from her, his eyes refocusing. 

 

“ _ I’m counting down,”  _ he sent to her before shaking himself free. 

 

“Are you back?” Cassandra asked, causing him to jump.

 

“I didn’t know you were there,” he said. 

 

“No, you were in your mind. Or hers,” she said. 

 

“Yes,” he said, “I didn’t realize...it was poignant.” 

 

“I have seen mate bonds before. Good and bad. Yours is the best I’ve ever witnessed. Even if Andraste didn’t send her to us, something did. I don’t believe in soulmates, I’ll have you know. But. I believe that she is yours. Congratulations, Cullen. When you need help finding a ring, let me know. I know a good jeweler,” she said. 

 

Cullen gave her the finger. She smirked as she turned to go. 

 

“Cassandra,” he called to her back. She turned to him. “Thank you.”

 

“Don’t mention it,” she said, closing the door behind her.

 

____

 

URSA wanted to fly to Cullen but didn’t. She held Dorian’s hand as they headed back into Skyhold. Solas was sitting in the foyer, his feet up on an end table as he read a yellow paged book. 

 

“Inquisitor. When you have a moment, I have some information you might want to hear,” he said. 

 

“In a bit,” she called back, “I’m a little busy right now.”

 

“I’ll be here,” he replied, going back to his book. 

 

Ursa shook her head. “How he manages to find the information he has I’ll never know,” she muttered. 

 

“You can go speak with him. Audri’s waiting for me with Krem. And vodka. I’ll be fine,” Dorian said.

 

“No. I...I let Cullen into my mind. All of it. I think I need to speak with him. He might be panicking a little,” she admitted. 

 

“You…” Dorian looked at her in disbelief. “Right. We’re talking about that later. But go. Find me after.”

 

Ursa left him at the base of the stairs. She steadied herself, took a deep breath, and then headed to Cullen’s office. 

 

____

 

**_“Don’t overwhelm her. She might not even know the extent that she let you in,”_ ** Anscomb advised. 

 

“I wouldn’t,” Cullen said.

 

**_“You might not know you’re doing it. Be careful. Very few people open themselves up that much. Would you, if she asked?”_ ** Anscomb asked.

 

Cullen thought about it but he had no answer. A soft knock caused him to look up. Ursa slid into the room, leaning back against the door. He blinked at her, unsure what he could say. They looked at each other in silence for a minute, the seconds ticking by.

 

“Do you still…?” she trailed off, unsure if she wanted to know the answer. 

 

He took three quick steps until he was standing in front of her. “Of course,” he said fiercely, “Of  _ course _ .” 

 

“Thank god,” she sighed, slumping forward. 

 

He stroked her hair. “Nothing about you is shameful. Except maybe your taste in music,” he said. 

 

That started a laugh from her, causing her to look up. She touched his cheek. He’d shaved since she’d left. 

 

“I don’t need you to do the same,” she said. He blinked at her in surprise. “I just...I don’t want you to think I’m trying to set some precedent. I wasn’t. I just, well I guess I was just tired of being that person. I thought maybe if I gave her to all of you I could say goodbye to it. It might not hurt anymore. I could just be this me. The one I like.” 

 

Cullen smiled down at her tenderly. If someone walked in he knew what they’d see. The Commander softened by the Inquisitor. The woman who made heavy choices everyday and the man who executed her decisions, sharing a moment of intimacy. He knew right then what his answer would be. He led her to his chair and sat her down.

 

“Are you going to strip for me? I can’t say I haven’t thought about it,. The armor was good but I want it all,” she teased. 

 

“No,” he said, “I’m going to give you what you gave me. Since it knocked me on my ass I thought this would be easier.”

 

“Oh,” she said, her smile falling. “Cullen...you don’t…”

 

“I want to. For the reasons you gave me. And for my own,” he said, trying to stop any doubt she had. 

 

She didn’t know what to say. Dyna slid around her feet, anchoring her. 

 

**_“He wants to. It’ll be alright,”_ ** she said soothingly. 

 

“It’s going to feel weird,” Cullen warned. “Follow Dyna. She led me through your mind, she can do the same for you.” 

 

Ursa nodded, eyes wide. He leaned over her, a soft smile curving his face. Ursa remembered when he’d never smiled. Now she couldn’t get through a day at Skyhold without one. She touched it gently before he pressed his lips to her temple. 

 

“I want you to see,” he whispered to her, “I told you there are things in my past that are rough. I’ve made terrible decisions. But I want you to know. It isn’t to be even, it’s because you deserve to know. Now just relax.” 

 

Ursa took a deep breath and let her eyes sink shut. She felt the moment he opened himself to her. Immediately she sunk into who he was. She was glad he’d sat her down. It felt as if someone had sucked her breath from her. She wasn’t sure if her eyes were open or closed. Dyna eased her backwards into his childhood, passing the fresh parts of who he was. Cullen playing with his sisters and brother as a child. Cullen, game boy in hand, walking a school hallway. Cullen, looking up at the templars who passed to go to the Keep. Anscomb claiming the young boy and the dizziness of their bond. Training to be a templar, always nervous and watching. Being placed for his first assignment. Killing his first bonded dragon and sobbing for the rest of the night. 

 

Ursa clung to soft hearted Cullen. This was the man she’d seen buried below the pain. This was the one who smiled at her, who kissed her, who hugged her waist as he woke. Dyna pushed her on. 

 

19 year old Cullen watching a rider who smiled and laughed and who flirted when she neared him. She scared him. He fled her advances, unsure and shaky. It was endearing, but then the memory changed. The riders rose up and Cullen’s memory put him in a cage. Here, his mind began to fracture. It was dark and the tortures they put him through caused Ursa to whimper. Cullen sat at her feet in his office and took her hands. He knew she couldn’t feel it, she was too deep in his mind, but he meant to soothe her. 

 

She felt each new torment as he did, understanding why he’d been so afraid to give himself away. When that female rider returned, he was broken. They’d shattered the kind young man he’d been and left an angry shell. The venom he spat at her was colored with his own shame. Dyna moved her forward. To his hatred of other riders. His distrust of dragon magic which led him to become stronger in the order. Memories of Meredith followed and Cullen’s unease at her use of the order became stronger. He was no longer so numb. He questioned. When he finally left her, he’d aided in her bloodbath and his anguish at that swept through him. The blood on his hands felt as if it would never come off. Dyna pulled Ursa away from dwelling, leading her to newer time.

 

Finally, Ursa found herself. Before she’d reached them, the eclectic group that had accumulated had begun to work together. Josephine, Cassandra, Leliana, Varric, Cullen and Solas had come together to try to help the people in feral territories. They’d been watching the Conclave, hoping for good news. Ursa’s arrival had been unwelcome in the wake of the disaster. It had dashed all of their hopes quickly but Cullen’s memory of her was different from her own. She’d felt out of place, as if everyone there was judging her. Cullen’s memory was filled with surprise. 

 

_ “Dragon’s talons, it’s a bloodbath,” Cullen muttered to Anscomb. The rift above them was releasing small dragons and other magical creatures. The men kept cutting them down but more just kept coming. Cullen helped a man limp backwards. Across the rift, Varric shot an arrow with a bellow and Solas muttered words to stun or harm the monsters. Cullen worried it would never end.  _

 

_ A lull fell over the rift minutes later and finally he could see across the field. Cassandra stood there, blood splattered on her armor and her mouth a grim line. Solas stood beside her, facing someone standing beside the stoic Seeker. _

 

_ “You found a way to close the rift,” he said, relieved.  _

 

_ “It wasn't me,” she replied, turning so he could see the woman behind him. “It was the prisoner.”  _

 

_ Cullen stopped in surprise. She was Dalish if her small build, slightly pointed ears, and face tattoo meant anything but she looked more lively than any Dalish  person he’d ever met. They were a sour people who clung to their lost heritage. Everyone else was lesser to them, as the world had done them no favors. This woman looked worried and out of place but not judgemental. She was beautiful. He would be a fool not to notice. He dismissed the thought quickly and turned back to the fact that she was a prisoner.  _

 

_ “Are you sure that’s wise?” he asked.  _

 

_ He saw the young woman flinch but ignored it. Better to have her hate him. Always better to have people at a distance.  _

 

_ Cassandra’s response had been forgotten, leaving the memory blurry.  Ursa heard only murmurs before Cullen turned to walk away. He didn’t look back until he was sure they wouldn’t notice. He looked at the woman holding the egg as she spoke to the others. Something about her was striking. Once more, he pushed the thought away. _

 

**_“She’s not a prisoner,”_ ** _ Anscomb murmured, “ _ **_She’s going to save us all.”_ **

 

_ Cullen ignored the words and turned back to his men. He had work to do.  _

 

Ursa was surprised at his own account of that day. For her it had felt different. She hadn’t known then what she would be. Anscomb clearly had. Moving on, Ursa lived the days Cullen had without her. His commitment to the Inquisition and his struggle with his blood addiction. He worked hard, most of the time forgoing sleep and food for work. He brightened when he spoke to Cassandra, their bond one of friendship that reminded Ursa of Dorian. 

 

As the memories eased, she touched a recent one. The moment she’d spoken the words “I love you” had changed him. He’d felt it himself for longer than he’d been willing to admit but he’d been afraid. Her voice uttering those words, so small but meaning so much, had given him hope. Ursa smiled softly at the memory. It was a good place to stop, she reasoned. She pulled herself from his mind with a deep sigh. Opening her eyes, she found his own amber ones watching her. 

 

She leaned forward to touch her forehead to his. “Thank you,” she murmured. 

 

Cullen melted at her touch. She didn’t hate him. She hadn’t recoiled. Her hands were on his shoulders and she was pulling him closer, not pushing him away. With a shaky breath, he lunged into her hold. She clung to him just as he did to her. They weren’t fixed. They might never be. But at least now they could help each other. They stayed like that for a long time, neither speaking. When they did separate it was with a growing need for one another. Cullen nearly dragged her to his bed. They didn’t speak there either. 

 

_____

 

“YOU’VE decided to stay for three more days, yes?” Solas asked when Ursa finally went to find him. He was in his designated alcove in the library flipping between an old book and his computer, a line creasing his forehead. 

 

“Yes,” she confirmed. “My dragon mated. I couldn’t ask her to leave her mate so soon.”

 

“No,” Solas agreed. “And you wouldn’t want to leave the Commander, no doubt.” 

 

Ursa blushed. “Right,” she said. “You had some information?”

 

“I do. Emprise Du Lion. I’d like to go. The magics there...no one’s seen them in many years. Those who go and who actually make it back speak of it was a connection to god. I’d like to see it. I also believe I can be helpful. The magic there isn’t tied to Andraste. It’s tied to the Dread Wolf,” he said. 

 

“It’s tied to the Keep?” Ursa asked, confused. 

 

“No,” Solas said with a shake of his head. “The Keep is named for an old god. Like Andraste, the Dread Wolf walked the Fade. He was not originally a god of any sort but a creature. He crossed over from the Fade hundreds of years ago. Or so it is believed. The Dalish saw him as a sign of their power. It was there that he became a god. When he couldn’t return to the Fade it’s said that they fell. The elvish empire rotted without him. Emprise Du Lion is a place of old Fade magic. It was prophesied that the Dead Wolf would return to his most powerful temple and cross back into the Fade to bring his people back to their former splendor.”

 

“That sounds...creepy. A god that crossed into our world and now wants to go back?” she said with a grimace.

 

“It’s a simple story but nonetheless, I’d like to see it. I believe I’m the most qualified to understand it and to help you, should it come to that,” he said.

 

“That’s fine. I’d love to have you,” she said, “You are the one who knows the most about this stuff.” 

 

“Good,” he said with a vague smile. “I’ll be ready, then.” 

 

Ursa nodded to him and headed out of the library to find Dorian. She had so many things to tell him. 

 

_____

 

“ARE you sure you’re okay?” Krem asked tenderly. 

 

Dorian nodded. “I needed to know and now I do.” 

 

“I wish I could’ve gone with you,” Krem said, “I would’ve...I don’t know. I just wish I could have been with you.”

 

“It’s alright,” Dorian said with a wave of his hand, “Ursa came.”

 

“I know,” Krem said, trying not to sound bitter, “And no doubt she took care of it.”

 

Dorian blinked. “Are you...jealous?”

 

Krem frowned. “Maybe a bit,” he confessed. “You go to her for everything that matters. I know you’ve been friends for years but I want to help you too.”

 

“You do,” Dorian said.

 

“I mean more so than just picking up the pieces,” Krem replied. 

 

“You do more than that. Ursa’s..she’s been there for my worst, that’s all. She’s my best friend. And in this case, she’s met my father. I thought she was going to kill him for how he spoke about me. If I’d brought you, it would’ve been worse. You’re more than just the one who picks up the pieces.”

 

“She’s just the one who fights the battle,” Krem said, trying to be supportive. Dorian opened his mouth to respond when they heard someone on the stairs.

 

“Knock knock?” Ursa’s voice called from outside the door. Krem sighed. 

 

“I’ll go,” he said sullenly. Dorian caught his hands. 

 

“No, hold on. Come in!” he called out to Ursa. She slipped into the room, smiling automatically at Dorian and then turning it to Krem.

 

“Hi!” she greeted, “Is he feeling better? And I mean for real, not that ‘I’m too pretty to be sad’ shit?” 

 

Krem couldn’t help but smile back. The Inquisitor was formidable on the battlefield and downright intimidating when she was giving orders but one on one she was a warm and kind person. It was hard to dislike her but was very easy to be jealous of her as well. 

 

“We went for a bit on the pretty part but I think we’re doing okay now,” he said.

 

“Oh good,” she said, folding down onto the floor, her legs crossed. 

 

“You can come sit up here,” Dorian protested. She shook her head. 

 

“You two look cozy. I’m fine here. Anyway. I need to tell you how it went,” she said eagerly. Dorian leaned forward, his own excitement palpable. Krem didn’t know what they were talking about so he stayed quiet. 

 

“Yes, do tell,” Dorian said. 

 

“Well at first I thought he might hate me. Everything I did...all those dumb decisions, you know what I mean. He was just happy to see me, though. But then...he let me into his own mind. Fully. I...I don’t even know what to say. He’s a better person than me, that’s for sure. Even if he doesn’t know it,” she said, shaking her head slightly. 

 

“Don’t do that. Don’t keep score. It isn’t healthy,” Dorian said. He slid forward on the bed even farther so his toes touched Ursa’s leg. Krem watched them. They didn’t even know they did it, probably. They’d spent so many years being the only ones allowed in each other’s space that it must have been subconscious by now. It was both sweet and infuriating. Ursa slid backwards, her eyes going to Krem for a moment before flicking back to Dorian. Krem got the distinct feeling she’d heard more than she’d let on outside the door.

 

“I’m not. It’s just true. He makes me want to be better. I’m doing this huge thing and half the time I’m just making it up as I go along. He makes me want to keep doing better. To learn more and just make better choices. What’s funny is he thinks the same thing about me,” she said, sounding giddy with the revelation.

 

Dorian made a noise of disgust, though his smile tempered it. “I told you, bear. I told you, you’d find someone. It’s supposed to be like that, I think. Enjoy it.”

 

Her gaze snuck to Krem once more. “I hope you’ve found that too,” she said slyly. 

 

Dorian blushed. Krem had never seen him turn red before and he blinked. “Dorian! You’re blushing!” 

 

“Now look what you’ve done,” Dorian scolded Ursa who only laughed. She stood, leaning in to kiss Dorian on the forehead.

 

“Turnabout's fair play,” she reasoned. “Besides, you love me.”

 

“Maybe not anymore,” he said. She chuckled as she stepped through the door. When it shut, Dorian turned to Krem. 

 

“I’m sorry, she-” 

 

Krem put a finger over Dorian’s lips. “The Boss says to tell someone when you care. Especially in our line of work. I hope you’ve found that too. I know I have.” 

 

Dorian was speechless. It was not a feeling he was used to. He launched himself at Krem, smiling when the man caught him and laughed. 


	13. 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa goes after Calpurnia and drinks the Dread Wolf's power.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two more after this! I've written them, just working on editing. Woo. this was the quickest I've ever written a fic but it caught me and wouldn't let go. Thanks to everyone who reads it for giving it a chance.

Chapter 13

 

THREE days passed far too quickly for Ursa’s liking. She woke on the morning of her travels and groaned. Cullen’s arm was over her waist, Dyna was at her feet and Anscomb wrapped around their pillows above them. It was cozy, making her wish she could stay long enough to get used to it. She’d led Cullen’s dreams away from his fearsome memories and had coaxed him into better thoughts through the night and she woke feeling accomplished but nothing could delay the fact that she had to leave in a few hours. She rolled to face Cullen, smiling fondly at his mussed hair and the crusted line of drool on his cheek. 

 

“ _ Good to know you aren’t always so perfectly gorgeous,”  _ she thought. 

 

Since they’d opened their minds they hadn’t bothered to shut each other out. It seemed like a waste to suddenly begin hiding. He stirred at her thought, his eyelids fluttering. She poked his nose so he snorted, his eyes opening slowly. 

 

“Yes?” he said dryly, the tone cut by the sleep in his voice. 

 

She grinned, touching his nose with hers. He ran his fingernails gently along her back so she hummed. 

 

“You’re worried that if you leave things will change,” he stated, finding the thought easily at the front of her mind. 

 

She burrowed against him, curling into the warmth of his chest. “It’s not a logical thought, I know,” she said. 

 

“No, it is. Things will change. Just not the way you’re worried about. You’ll go. You’ll find Calpurnia and we’ll be one step closer to ending this,” he said. 

 

“I’m just...what if this is a dream? What if I go away and you decide this isn’t what you want?” she felt foolish even saying it but she knew he could see the thought. It wasn’t worth pretending it wasn’t there. 

 

“You aren’t going to go back to the life you left. You won’t ever have to go there again. We can stay here for the rest of our lives if you want. Or we can leave, travel, go anywhere else in the world you wish to go. This will end and you’ll still be here. You’ll still be this person and I love this person. That won’t change,” Cullen said soothingly. 

 

She nodded. She could feel his sincerity. This man loved her. She’d never heard the words with as much truth as he said them. She would never need to go back to the Keep. She could do whatever she wished when this was over. With a sigh, she snuggled closer. 

 

“10 more minutes,” she murmured, “Then we have to get up.”

 

“Okay,” Cullen said, closing his eyes and inhaling the scent of her hair. “10 more minutes.” 

 

____

 

“YOU’RE an hour late,” Cassandra complained when Ursa made it to the garage. Ursa couldn’t muster any remorse. She shrugged. Varric, Solas, Dorian, Cole, and Sera were waiting at the car. 

 

“You’re all coming?” she asked in surprise.

 

“You think we’d let you do this alone?” Varric retorted. 

 

Ursa hadn’t seen much of the rogue since they’d been in Skyhold. He’d holed up writing, claiming inspiration. Ursa just hoped she wouldn’t see her name in one of his books.  

 

“I just didn’t think you’d all want to come,” she replied.

 

“Want is a strong word,” Sera snorted, “But I’ll be damned if you get all the glory on this. Besides, I think I’ve learned my lesson. Staying here isn’t safe, either.”

 

Ursa looked at the group. It was an odd group but she wouldn’t have it any other way. When she smiled a watery smile, Cassandra rolled her eyes. 

 

“Get in the car,” the seeker ordered, “We’re late.” 

 

____

 

“WHEN you said we’d see any attacks coming I didn’t think we’d see this many,” Ursa tried to sound breezy as two more feral dragons came into sight. 

 

The group had been traveling for three days to reach Emprise Du Lion. It was nearly in sight, the line of the trees calling to them, but as they’d crossed the open field between them and their guide a wave of dragons had begun cresting the treeline. 

 

“ **Those are Unspoken dragons,”** Dyna said, sounding bewildered.  **“I didn’t think they would side with Corypheus. They want freedom from the Fade as much as we do.”**

 

Ursa squinted. There was a slight glow around them. “I think they might be bound. See that? They’re shiny.”

 

“Does it matter?” Sera asked, her voice shrill.

 

“Not at this moment, but it’s good to know,” Ursa said with a shrug as the dragon’s neared. 

 

“Should’ve brought Bull,” Dorian muttered, “He loves this shit.” 

 

“Too late for what ifs,” Ursa said as the dragons got even closer. She grabbed her pistol and caught the side handle on Dyna’s saddle. “Ready?” 

 

**“As much as I can be. Andraste preserve us,”** Dyna replied. 

 

Ursa nodded. “Give them hell down here,” she said to the others. Dorian climbed onto Audri and nodded to her. With a deep breath and a prayer, they took off. 

 

_____

 

URSA loved air combat. Most of her life she’d been told she wasn’t strong enough or fast enough to be a true rider. In the air she knew for a fact that none of what they’d told her was true. She shot with unnerving accuracy and didn’t flinch when fire flew by her shoulder. Across from her Audri dove under so they went over. Below them, Solas was calling out words in dragon tongue so their dual hit of blade and bullet knocked the dragon from the sky. She waved to the man on the ground before focusing back on what was coming. 

 

Three more were in the distance. Ursa could feel Cullen and Anscomb watching through her eyes. 

 

_ “I’m fine,”  _ she sent back to them.

 

_ “You’re more than that. You’re magnificent,”  _ Cullen replied, awed. 

 

Ursa sent him her amusement before focusing back on the task at hand. He’d taught her well. She flew beautifully, as if she was meant to be on the back of a dragon. She cut the dragons to the ground almost easily. Dyna had given her the way to her Fade magic and with her dragon’s bond so strongly connected to her, they used it effortlessly. Dorian was also a skilled rider. He’d shown off for many of the soldiers and riders in Skyhold in the near year they’d been there. Flying with him was both a joy and a comfort. In a fight, Ursa didn’t worry for him. Dorian had always been good at holding his own. They flew as a team. 

 

**_“It’s a water dragon. Fly under. I’ll shoot him from above,”_ ** Audri told Dyna. The younger dragon agreed. She relayed the plan to Ursa. Ursa nodded, ready for the move. 

 

It hurt Dyna to watch a dragon fall. The other dragons they’d dropped were now dead on the ground. Even through its binding hold to Corypheus the water dragon they fought screamed in fury and pain at the loss. A dragon’s loss was profound. It transcended the body and sunk into the minds of those left behind. Dyna was made to hunt. To fly. To find joy in the wind and the blood of those who were lesser. She was not meant to kill so many of her own kind. The water dragon cried out in pain as Audri sent shock after shock through her. Her mind spasmed in anguish as she fell to the ground. Dyna’s shiver passed through her and onto her bonded mate. Anscomb soothed her mind and she found solace in his touch. 

 

_ “No more on the horizon, you okay?”  _ Ursa asked Dyna gently. 

 

**_“I’m fine. We can go back down,”_ ** Dyna replied, swooping to the ground as she spoke. Audri landed beside her and while Dorian laughed at the high flying gave him, Audri rubbed Ursa’s stomach with her nose.

 

**_“It gets easier. Not by much, but it does,”_ ** Audri said. 

 

Dyna nodded. She looked over at Dorian and Ursa. They were checking the scales of the dragons they’d felled but before the bitterness could set into her hide, Dyna noticed what Ursa was doing. 

 

The mark on their arms was said to be that of Andraste. It came only with the burning touch of a dragon. It curved up the wrist and sat against the human’s pulse. Most riders believed it’s what held the magic of the bond in the first place. Ursa was tracing the mark on the most beautiful scales on each dragon. Dyna listened more intently to her rider’s mind.

 

_ “May you go to Andraste and fly in the Fade. I’m sorry. This war shouldn’t have taken you too.”  _

 

It was a tender prayer for each fallen dragon and it reminded Dyna of why she’d wanted Ursa to be with her in the first place. 

 

“I don’t like standing out in the open longer than necessary,” Cassandra prompted as Ursa reached the last one.

 

“Just one more. It isn’t fair that it had to come to this. The least I can do is try to send them home,” Ursa said. She knelt under the body of a dark blue fire dragon. A single silver scale shone from his belly. She touched it, whispering her prayer before standing. The group watched her. 

 

“What?” she asked, self conscious. 

 

“Nothing,” Varric said with a disbelieving shake of his head.

 

Ursa squinted at them before huffing. “Fine. Let’s go.” 

 

____

 

MORRIGAN had led many scholars to the ruins in Emprise Du Lion. What she was not expecting was the Herald of Andraste. The woman who had procured her services had only said it would be a party. When they came to the meeting spot and the green light emitted from the younger woman’s hand, she couldn’t hide her surprise.

 

“Let me guess, Josephine didn’t tell you who you were meeting,” Ursa said dryly. 

 

The woman in front of her was beautiful. Older, distinguished in her own rite, and with clever eyes, she assessed the party quickly. Dark hair and light eyes that made Ursa think of a cat completed the mysterious look of their guide. She held out her hand to shake. 

 

“I’d much rather see the other one,” the woman said with a smirk. 

 

Ursa pulled off the glove she wore and offered her left hand. Morrigan took it, tipping it to get better lighting in the shade of the trees. 

 

“Fascinating magic you have here. It reeks of Andraste,” she said. 

 

“How can you tell?” Ursa asked. 

 

Morrigan smiled, tracing the pattern of the shell in Ursa’s palm. “I spend my time in the elven ruins here. Your ancestors home. Well, at least partly yours. The Dread Wolf’s magic has a different feel. It’s more raw. Harsh. He was a terrible god. While Andraste served beside nature the Dread Wolf served only himself. The Dalish praised him out of fear that turned to hope. He was pleased with such service and he lifted them up but the cost to himself was great. His energy here is filled with anger as is most of his magic. Andraste is softer. You can feel her touch in you. It goes deeper than the shell or even than your dragon. It’s in your birth. She helped shape you.” 

 

Ursa blinked. Her mouth worked but nothing came out. 

 

“And who are you?” Cassandra asked abruptly. She sounded irritated. Morrigan turned her mysterious smile on Cassandra. 

 

“Morrigan. And that’s all you need to know. I’m here to lead you to the ruins. If there’s danger, it costs you extra. If someone is hurt, it costs you extra and if one of you tries to so much as touch me…”

 

“It costs us extra. We got it,” Varric said with a roll of his eyes. 

 

“Good,” Morrigan said with a firm nod. “We’ll stay here for the night and head to the ruins in the morning.” 

 

There were tents set up already along with a single bathtub hidden behind a curtain. 

 

“We won’t have that for the rest of the trip so take advantage now,” Morrigan said. “And if you decide to bathe together, don’t disturb me. I need my rest if I’m to lead you through.”

 

Morrigan strutted off to her own tent, knowing they were watching her leave. 

 

“Piece of work, that one,” Varric whistled. 

 

Solas shrugged and picked a tent, ducking into it without a word. 

 

“Dorian’s in my tent,” Ursa said quickly. 

 

“Looks like that leaves me with the egghead,” Varric said with a sigh. 

 

Cassandra looked at the tent Sera had chosen with thinly veiled disgust. Sera poked her head out, grinning back cheerfully. Cassandra rolled her eyes but followed the smaller woman.  When they’d all ducked into their tents Ursa looked at Dorian. 

 

“Let’s take a bath,” she grinned.

 

Dorian grinned back. “You’re terrible. Let’s do it.” 

 

_____

 

BACK in Skyhold, Cullen locked himself in his office and climbed to his loft. Ursa was taking off her clothes, laughter in both her voice and mind as she spoke. Morrigan’s words weren’t far from her thoughts but she’d pushed them away. She could dwell on her heritage later.  She teased Cullen in her mind while joking with Dorian as they climbed into the tub. Dyna heated it for them and they both settled in while in his mind, Cullen saw what she wished she could be doing with him. Her thoughts were vivid, making him groan. She laughed at him, goading him on with her fantasies. 

 

His hand slid into the waist of his boxers and even though she was miles from him, he spent his evening wound with her as one. 

 

____

 

THE ruins were beautiful. Delicate statues and ivy made the quiet seem reverent. Morrigan smiled with satisfaction as they looked on. They’d been guided through the worst of the forest easily but Ursa felt herself relax just a touch more at the sight of their destination. 

 

“The magic here…” Solas trailed off. 

 

“Yes. It’s quite strong. It’s said the Dread Wolf will return one day to take it back. I believe the magic lies in the pools beyond the gates. I’ve never gotten that far. It’s nearly impossible to reach, but it is said to have been the center of the temple and of prayer,” Morrigan said. 

 

“Yes. I want to see it,” Solas said. 

 

“We’re here for a reason. That isn’t the goal,” Cassandra said. 

 

“No, but Calpurnia is no doubt hoping to drink from the water there. The elven priests who lived here drank of the water and were buried in it. They passed the magic on through their lives. Only those touched by the Fade can drink it and not go mad. If we get there first we could taint the water. A new drink means the magic is disrupted. Based on my research of this place, historians believe that without a new source of magic this is the end of it.Drink it first and Calpurnia will have nothing to return with,” Solas argued.

 

“Calpurnia doesn’t have a dragon. She worked for the Glory as a clerk. She isn’t touched by Fade energy. Why would she want to drink the water if it could kill her or make her crazy?” Ursa asked, crossing her arms.

 

“I think we’ve established Corypheus lies,” Varric said. 

 

“Yes, Inquisitor. If he told her it would give her power she would do it, no matter the cost. People have done less for the same promise,” Cassandra said. 

 

Ursa nodded. “Alright. Morrigan, can you lead us in?”

 

“Usually I wouldn’t but you’ve caught my interest, Inquisitor. I’ll take you in. If you make it out alive I’ll expect a large boost in pay, though,” Morrigan replied. 

 

Ursa nodded. “That’s fair. Let’s go.”

 

_____

 

CALPURNIA had spent her life as a slave. Or as close as she could get in the year 2017. She’d served the Glory from a young age because her parents were riders. She was never chosen. A life inside a Keep without a dragon was a dull one. You were looked down upon, handed the menial tasks no rider wanted to do. And there was no way out, not really. When Calpurnia had been found by the dragon lord she’d been a cynical and bitter woman. With his help she’d risen. She’d helped to taint the Unspoken. She’d bound the feral dragons to new riders and she’d led the armies to the gates of Haven. Now she stood in the ruins of an ancient temple and looked up to where her future sat. 

 

There were dragons between her and it. She smiled. With her small but powerful band of fighters at her back, she ran forward. She would no longer be a slave, she vowed as she cut down the first dragon. 

 

____

 

“IT’S too quiet,” Morrigan said. 

 

“There’s been a fight here,” Cassandra said. She wiped blood from the walls with the finger of her glove. “It seems someone's been slaughtering dragons.” 

 

“The water is up there,” Solas pointed. 

 

“It’s freaky how you know all these things,” Dorian said. Solas stiffened. 

 

“You studied the ancient Dalish as well?” Morrigan asked and Solas relaxed. 

 

“Yes,” he said. “We must get up there.” 

 

“I want to talk to her if I can. He’s been lying to her. If I can convince her of that maybe we can stop her from even trying to drink it. It doesn’t seem...safe,” Ursa said doubtfully. 

 

“On the contrary. If one of us drank it we could see what the elves had been handing down. It might even hold some information we need to defeat Corypheus for good,” Solas said. 

 

Ursa shook her head. “And if it’s something terrible? If it just hurts us? Who drinks it?”

 

“I do,” Solas said at the same time as Morrigan. They looked at one another in surprise. 

 

“No,” Ursa said with a shake of her head. 

 

“Why not?” Morrigan demanded. “I’ve been coming here for years. I deserve it.”

 

“That’s why,” Ursa replied. “This is magic older than any of us. No one knows what it does. No one deserves it. Plus I don’t see a dragon with either of you. I’ll do it, if it comes down to it. The rest of you won’t touch it. It’s not safe.” 

 

Solas watched the determination settle into her face. He shrugged, forcing himself to let it go. Ursa nodded firmly and turned. 

 

“Let’s go. We’ve been bickering long enough.” 

 

____

 

CORYPHEUS had warned Calpurnia that the Inquisitor might show up so she wasn’t too concerned when the young woman appeared at the base of the stairs. Calpurnia waved her hand. 

 

“Kill them,” she said lazily. 

 

Her men ran at the party below them. Ursa nearly rolled her eyes. She stepped back and shot Fade energy from her hand. It threw the men back into the stairs, stunning them. 

 

“Don’t kill them,” she told Cassandra, “Not until I’ve talked to her.” 

 

Cassandra nodded. She waved the others forward as Ursa hopped up the stairs. Calpurnia turned. 

 

“Inquisitor. It seems you’ve bested my men. I can’t say I expected it,” she said. She’d thought there would be more of a fight. She looked uneasy for the first time as Cassandra and the others took her men’s weapons and backed them against the wall. 

 

“Corypheus lied to you,” Ursa said, not bothering to greet the other woman. “You don’t have a dragon. The energy in this water will ruin your mind. He probably just wants to control you like he controls the dragons and riders in his army. Without a connection to the Fade you’ll go crazy drinking this.” 

 

Calpurnia looked Ursa up and down. She crossed her arms. “We’re a lot alike, Inquisitor. I’ve heard about your past. A Dalish non rider in a Keep. I lived a life like that too. But my life didn’t go quite the way yours did. A beautiful man in your life, a dragon, power. How much would you give to have that if you didn’t?” 

 

“This wasn’t something I “won”. It was something I fell into. I wouldn’t give it up but I would never kill innocent people to get here. Not like you have,” Ursa replied. 

 

“But you have, Inquisitor. All those dragons and riders you’ve killed. My men. Maybe even me. Andraste has a way of making weapons out of people. Why shouldn’t I become one too?” Calpurnia challenged. 

 

“Because you’ll become a true slave,” Ursa said, changing tactics. If Calpurnia wanted to become a weapon let her, but she hated being a slave. “I’m a slave to no one.  _ I  _ decide what I do. It’s my decisions that shake the world. You will lose your mind and he will harness it. You’ll no longer be in control.”

 

Calpurnia stilled. Her smile slid from her face. “He wouldn’t.” 

 

“You saw what he did to the dragons and their riders. Anything he can’t control he destroys. You think he won’t do the same to you? Don’t drink this. Find another way to fight,” Ursa said. She wasn’t pleading, she wasn’t begging, she was telling. Calpurnia looked at the ground and Ursa knew she’d won. She waited three long minutes as Calpurnia thought.

 

“If you win this war, change this world. For the better. Don’t leave women like us forgotten,” Calpurnia said, backing up towards the stairs slowly. She could feel the truth in the other woman’s voice. She wouldn’t risk her mind, not now. 

 

“I won’t. Take your men and run. Now,” Ursa said. 

 

Calpurnia nodded and with that, she was gone. Ursa blew out a sigh and looked at the water. She had another decision to make. 

 

“You let her go,” Cassandra accused. 

 

“Yes. She isn’t the important piece here. Not anymore. She was just a slave to him. Now she isn’t. Let her find a new place in the world. I think you were right, Solas. I think one of us needs to drink it,” Ursa said, looking down into the water dubiously. 

______

 

THE magic called to Solas. It was his magic, after all. But he was more human than god now. Perhaps it was better to have Ursa drink it. He could take it back later. He couldn’t be sure that his weakened state would be able to handle such potent magic.  He watched Ursa stare into the still and clear water. She would need help to take the first step. He muttered under his breath and with a slight push of his dragon tongue spell, she squealed and tumbled into the water. 

 

_____

 

IT sung to her. The power of Andraste in her hand expanded around her and the dragon’s soft voice urged her to open her mouth. She took a deep breath, surprised she didn’t choke as the water filled her lungs. Her mind became hazy. Andraste commanded her to hold onto her bonds so she did. As information and power poured into her mind and blood, she clung to those who kept her human. 

 

Dyna screamed, writhing on the floor of the temple. Ursa was holding tightly to their connection but it felt as if a knife was cutting through her mind. In Skyhold Anscomb cried out and Cullen fell to his knees mid training. They felt the searing pain of the Dread Wolf’s magic trying to destroy Ursa and by extension, their claim to her. She clung to them and in their pain, they clung right back. 

 

“Hold on my dear, hold on,”  Andraste said calmly as Ursa inhaled another lungful of water. 

 

It was excruciating. There was too much power, too much magic, and too much information forcing its way into her. This was meant for a god, not a single woman and then Ursa realized. She might have been chosen by Andraste but she was no god. She would die under the crush of power unless she shared it. It was not meant for a single soul. She pulled on her connections to Dyna, Anscomb, and Cullen. They were there suffering with her. With a loud scream, her head broke the surface of the water. She held to the tethers of their minds and released what she was given into them. It rushed through their minds, pieces flowing into each one. No longer did she try to keep the Dread Wolf’s force to herself. She gave it away with a choked off cry.

 

“Yes. It’s not meant for one. Give it. Give the gift of a god to others. Good. Yes, my dear. Yes, sweet-blood. Let them share the burden.” 

 

Ursa fell over the edge of the pool, coughing. She felt numb, lost to the white hot fire racing through her. She could feel Cullen curling around himself. Anscomb screamed out fire and Dyna’s whimpers were crashing against her ears. They were alive. They were changed. As the power settled inside of her, she opened her eyes. Dorian gasped and stumbled back. Ursa’s usually bright eyes were filled with color. One grey, one green. Andraste and the Dread Wolf sharing her body, claiming any space they could. She shook her head as she began to feel again. 

 

“I know how to beat him,” she said fuzzily. 

 

“What?” Morrigan asked but Ursa couldn’t speak anymore. The Dread Wolf was furious. He would come for her. He would pull the very blood from her veins if he had to. She shivered. Catching Solas’ eye, she promptly threw up. 

 

_____

 

“YOU’RE saying that you four now hold the combined power of a god?” Leliana demanded. It had taken more than a week to reach Skyhold once more and another four days for Ursa and Dyna to recuperate. Cullen and Anscomb had taken only two but the man was still paler than usual.  Morrigan had joined them, claiming a need to see her payment though none of them believed it. She was too inquisitive about the magic now in Ursa’s body.  No one bothered to send her away. She could be helpful and she seemed harmless enough at Skyhold, arguing with Solas mostly. She now stood in the war room with the others, her expertise allowing her entry.

 

Ursa was sitting as was Cullen. They’d both been under the weather since the power had scalded into them. He gripped her hand tightly at the question but didn’t speak. He was still reeling from the sliver of strength he was given. He couldn’t imagine how Ursa felt. Her memories of it made him physically ill. 

 

“The Dread Wolf left his power there, though he didn’t know it at the time. Not only was the magic there residual of the priests, it was all that was left of the Dread Wolf’s immortality,” Morrigan said. “When she drank the water it nearly killed her. She was lucky to have such a strong bond to hand it down or else she’d be dead.” 

 

“That’s me. Mrs. Luck,” Ursa said weakly. 

 

Josephine hovered. “Do you need anything?” she fretted. She’d already offered Ursa everything she could think of to make the woman more comfortable. Ursa had gotten used to saying no. 

 

Ursa shook her head. “I think it just needs to...settle. But I called you all here because I can’t sit on this anymore. I know how to win this. It’s going to take some time but I can get us ready. I know how to win.”

 

They all stared at her. Cullen leaned forward so his elbows rested on his knees. He winced at the movement, clearing his throat. 

 

“We know how to win. And it’s going to take all of us,” he said. When they all stared at him he spoke again. “The magics in us can be utilized on the field. Dyna knows how to open our riders to the power of the Fade, thanks to Andraste. With our combined knowledge of the Dread Wolf, we can finish this.”

 

The council stared at him. He looked back, his eyes going steely. “To work,” he ordered. Ursa couldn’t help but agree. 


	14. 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ursa trains the Inquisition for the final fight. Orion, Ursa's brother, comes to Skyhold. They finally fight Corypheus. Cullen asks Ursa an important question.

Chapter 14

 

A month passed quickly. Ursa had come to terms with her new power and had began her work immediately. The Dread Wolf’s magic had opened another dimension of Andraste’s Fade touched powers. Not only could Dyna teach the dragons and their riders, Ursa could as well. She stood beside Cullen, a new kind of Commander on the field. 

 

“For fuck’s sake, use your  _ shield! _ ” Cullen shouted at a recruit seconds before he was hit. The young man fell on his ass and blushed. Ursa grinned. 

 

“The magic we’ll be using is that of nature and life!” she called out. “But don’t mistake it for easy or gentle. It can and will try to kill you.If you don’t have a dragon you  _ need  _ to be on defense as well as offense. Dragons, try to control your shots. I know this isn’t quite what you’re used to but it is half what the feral dragons will be using. Tap into your magic. Aim. Shoot. And for fuck’s sake, use your damn shields!”

 

Cullen gave her a fleeting grin before turning back to his own work His shouts and corrections put Ursa at ease. She looked up when someone called her name, surprised to see Giselle walking towards her. 

 

“Ah, the bearer of bad news,” Ursa greeted, cutting the words with a smile, “Anything terrible to tell me today?” 

 

The woman looked at the ground and swallowed heavily. “I’m...I’m so sorry, your Worship.”

 

She handed over a letter. It had been opened, as most mail to Ursa was. That wasn’t what surprised her. It was the handwriting. 

 

“Orion? Why is he writing to me?” she muttered to herself, flipping open the envelope and unfolding the letter. 

 

Giselle couldn’t help but watch. Ursa’s lips moved as she read, her eyes darting across the page. The other woman saw the moment Ursa got to the information. Ursa’s lips stopped moving. Dyna, Anscomb, and Cullen all turned in tandem and Giselle fled. She heard a wail behind her but she didn’t turn back. 

 

_____

 

THEY were dead. All of them. The Dalish Keep had been burned to the ground and her family along with it. Orion, Ursa’s older brother had been out on a mission or he too would have died. His letter was burdened with sadness and more welcoming to her than he’d been for most of Ursa’s life.

 

“ We are the last of our family. We need each other. I am on my way to Skyhold with those of us that are left. I hope you’re our salvation, little bear. May God and Andraste forgive us our sins as they did for our family.” 

 

Ursa stared at the words. There were tear stains smearing the words but still, she stared. She would stare until they had run off the page, she was sure. Her family, everyone she’d known, dead. She’d had Dorian tell Sera, her own shock making her lips numb. Only those bonded to her could reach her now.  She’d fallen into a stupor as the words wrapped around her mind. Cullen held her for hours, knowing she didn’t feel his arms but needing to do it anyway.  He kissed her cheeks, tasting the salt of her tears. She stirred for the first time since she’d fallen to the ground. 

 

“He’s coming here,” she croaked. Cullen turned her gently in his arms. He pried the paper from her fingers before settling her back to his chest. 

 

“I know,” he said gently, placing the paper on the nightstand. She didn’t seem to notice. 

 

“He never...they didn’t want me. I was there shame. But now...what am I supposed to do now?” she asked, her voice small.

 

“Whatever you want to do. You can turn him away,” Cullen offered. She shook her head.

 

“No. He’s right. We’re what's left. We have to get over our differences. I just...I don’t know what I feel. I know I’m supposed to be sad. And I am. It’s such a  _ waste. _ And they were my family...but it wasn’t home. They weren’t welcoming. I don’t know what he wants from me. It’s been 25 years and he’s never been very kind. I want him here but is it just to prove myself? I thought when this was over I would have something to show them all. Now he’s all that’s left…” Ursa rambled. 

 

Cullen squeezed her. “If he isn’t proud of you now he won’t ever be. Let him come. We can show him what the Inquisition is. Maybe he’ll help and if not, you have your family here.” 

 

She nodded, leaning back and letting his comforting presence in her mind ease some of her sadness. He had his hand on her stomach and she watched his fingers trace patterns on her smooth skin. 

 

“I thought I’d never have kids,” she said abruptly. His hand stilled. “After my childhood I thought I could never give that to a kid. I couldn’t damn them like I’d been damned. Not in the Keep. I knew they’d look like me. With my luck they’d be even more shameful and they’d feel just as trapped.”

 

There was a stillness in them all as they processed her words. Dragons and man allowed the thought to settle inside of them, unsure of its meaning.  Finally, Cullen broke the silence. 

 

“And now?” he asked, his voice husky. 

 

“Not now. But I think...I think I would want to. With…” she trailed off, interlocking their fingers and squeezing. 

 

Cullen’s emotions were quick and bright. A rose colored joy touched with embarrassment that felt like summer passed her mind. Ursa smiled. Her eyes were hot and itchy and her stomach ached with loss but his blinding happiness at the idea made her feel a little less empty. She turned to face him, laying her legs over his so they were nearly nose to nose. 

 

“Not yet. Not...soon. I just. I can think about it now. I’m...well maybe not this very moment, but I’m happy here. I want this to be home. Josephine’s been teaching me how to garden. I’ve been planting roses. It’s starting to feel more and more like home everyday,” she said. 

 

Cullen ran his hands up and down her arms. “It is home. We’ll stay here. Go where we wish but always come back here. I love you. It’s our future, now.” 

 

Ursa nodded as the tears spilled down her cheeks again. Her family was dead but the family she’d chosen was right here. Cullen was holding her. Downstairs, Josephine was working. Out in the yard, Cassandra worked on her blade work. Across the castle Dorian lay with Krem. Varric wrote. Leliana plotted. Though eventually some of them would leave, right now her family was here with her. She closed her eyes and let herself cry. Cullen held her through the tears. When she fell asleep he laid her down in the bed and looked at Anscomb. 

 

**_“Talk to Cassandra,”_ ** the dragon said privately. Dyna too was sleeping, her tail wrapped around Ursa’s arm. 

 

Cullen looked back at Ursa and nodded. It might be time to discuss that jeweler. 

 

______

 

ORION Levallen and the last of the Dalish riders arrived two weeks after his letter. Josephine met them at the gate. She could see the surprise in their faces as they entered the sweeping grounds. They must have listened to what the Glory spouted about the Inquisition, she noted. The Glory preached a lie of hovels and unprofessionalism. The riders could see only prosperity. She approached them on pale Jimmy Choos and with an Ipad in her hands and her hair tied back so it wouldn’t fall in her face. 

 

“We’ve been expecting you,” she lilted. “Which of you is Orion?” 

 

A tall, slim, pale, man stepped forward. He had Ursa’s eyes. His tattoos were a bright blue and painted across most of his face. His mouth was small and downturned as he tried to hide how impressed he truly was. In her mind, Melly joked that he looked like he sucked lemons. Josephine batted her dragon away with a bright scolding, hiding her smile.

 

“I’m Orion. This is Hester,” he said, gesturing to the silver dragon at his shoulder. “Where’s my sister?”

 

“Working, I’m afraid. I’ll take you to her, if you wish,” Josephine said. 

 

“I do,” he said firmly. Josephine nodded. Orion was clearly a man used to being in charge. She wondered how long that would last. 

 

_____

 

“JESUS christ,  _ block! _ ” Cullen cried in exasperation as Ursa easily threw the men back with a simple burst of Fade energy. She grinned at him. He’d made her put on leather armor infused with dragon oil. She was too reckless with her body in a fight and he hoped to instill some form of safety in her. So far she’d only complained but she hadn’t taken it off. She ran gloved fingers through her hair, flexing her right hand a few times before bouncing off Dyna’s back. 

 

“Was that good?” she called out to him. 

 

“From you, yes. For the rest of you, if the Inquisitor alone can unseat you imagine what a dragon could do,” Cullen chided. 

 

“Hey, I resent that,” she said. He looked at her, feeling her humor in his mind. He took a moment to appreciate where life had led him. He knew her. She’d given him her mind and body without complaint or shame. He was blessed. She stuck out her tongue.  He rolled his eyes at her and turned back to the men. 

 

“She’s going to mount her dragon and try to kill you. Don’t go easy on them. They need to be ready for a real fight,” he said. 

 

The men began to look uneasy while Ursa shrugged. “Sure,” she said. 

 

She saw Josephine and waved, not looking at who she was leading. Josephine was always doing some kind of tour. She was the one who dealt with the money and as such, she entertained the rich. It was Ursa’s job to show off. Be the woman the world wished her to be. 

 

_ “Josephine’s coming,”  _ Ursa said to Cullen. He looked across the training ring.

 

“ _ Don’t actually kill them,”  _ Cullen replied. 

 

Ursa reached out, a fiery grin on her face. As Dyna charged by and up into the air, Ursa caught the handle on the side of the saddle, swinging herself up in mid air. 

 

_ “Show off,”  _ Cullen chided. 

 

Ursa didn’t respond. Power was flaming in her veins. She’d grown used to the warring gods inside of her. She and Dyna had worked for weeks on controlling what they’d taken into them. When they’d felt safe in it, they’d trained with Cullen and Anscomb until they all felt secure enough to use it. Now she enjoyed the feeling. She focused on the men on the ground, laughing when Cullen called out the riders to chase her. 

 

**_“Slide under, shoot them from there,”_ ** Dyna goaded. Ursa nodded. She swung out of her saddle and held on using only her legs. She’d had to learn to ride without use of her right hand. She no longer felt off balance hanging under Dyna’s belly, feet tight in the stirrups to keep her in the air. She used her mark to fire at the men, causing them to scatter. When a bullet grazed the air by her ear, she looked behind them.

 

_ “Bank right. Get us over them. We’ll drop the energy on them. Just make sure we herd them down. I don’t want anyone getting hurt,”  _ Ursa told Dyna. 

 

The Dread Wolf’s energy could stun a dragon out of the sky. It was a gift unique to the four now holding his magic but they still trained the riders to deal with the sudden loss of flight. Ursa swung herself back up into the saddle and whooped as Dyna banked hard to get them above the four dragons and their riders. When they were close enough to the ground, Ursa released the power coiled in her belly. The dragons dropped, wings suddenly useless. 

 

“Woo! Inquisitor 1, everyone else 0!” she called as Dyna landed. She swung off Dyna’s back and nearly skipped up to Cullen. He looked at his men and shook his head.

 

“You did well,” he told them. They groaned. 

 

“You did,” Ursa added. “Hopefully they won’t have anything in their arsenal quite so powerful but against a Fade touched dragon with abnormal strength, you did wonderfully. Besides, none of you were actually trying to hurt me. You could have.”

 

The men nodded as Josephine called out to Ursa. Ursa turned, pulling the layer of armor off her body and sticking her tongue out at Cullen, to face Josephine. She stopped her movements when she saw who stood behind her friend. 

 

“Oh,” she said faintly. 

 

“Little bear,” Orion said. He looked her up and down. If she didn’t know him she wouldn’t have noticed the shock in his expression. She kicked off the rest of the armor. Her white T-shirt clung to her with sweat so she pulled it from her belly with her glowing left hand. Cullen stepped up behind her. She subtly flexed her right hand so he stopped walking and just watched. 

 

“Orion,” she greeted. 

 

“I didn’t…” he trailed off, frustrated with his lack of words. 

 

“You didn’t think I could get this far,” Ursa said flatly. 

 

“No. Yes. I don’t...can we talk? Not here. Privately,” Orion asked. 

 

“Sure. Cullen?” Ursa turned, cocking her head. Cullen nodded. He took a sip of water and walked to her side, taking her hand.

 

“Alone,” Orion said pointedly. 

 

“No,” Ursa said flatly. “Cullen is my partner. Our dragons are mated. He’s coming. I’d be happy to invite the rest of my council if you’d like to argue.” 

 

Orion blinked. Gone was the timid girl who watched the world through a veil. This woman stood tall. She was strong. She had a powerful dragon at her side and the man who took her hand didn’t look cowed, he watched her with respect. Orion wondered what their parents would think of they could see her now. She cocked her head, right eyebrow curved upward. He felt his sneer as he replied.

 

“Very well.” 

  
  


_____

 

“WHAT do you want from me?” Ursa asked before the door had fully shut.

 

“Is Dorian here?” Orion asked instead. Ursa groaned. She fell into a large chair and put her heels on the giant table in front of her. Orion would have to be blind to not notice she felt comfortable here. She idly tapped a marker on the table with her toe. 

 

“Yes, he is. Why? Did his father call you, too? Did he tell you how badly I behaved with him?” she snapped. 

 

“No, god, Ursa. I’m just asking,” Orion said in frustration. 

 

“No you’re not. You’re doing what mom did. You’d push the right buttons. Pretend you care but really you’re seeing how many people you have to fight. Or you’re just assessing how the Inquisition can help you now. Which I will. If you just tell me what you want,” Ursa shot back.

 

Orion looked at Cullen. The man was standing behind Ursa, his hand resting on the back of her chair. He hadn’t spoken and even now just watched. He gestured at Ursa.

 

“Could you tell her I’m just here to see her?” he asked.

 

Cullen looked at him in speculation. “I’m afraid I can’t. She knows you better than I do. I’ve learned to trust her instincts.” 

 

Ursa smiled warmly up at him, the look knocking Orion even more off stride. His sister had never smiled like that in all the years he’d known her. Dorian was the closest she’d come but this was something different. It was brighter, settled, happy. She turned her attention back to him and he deflated. 

 

“Fine. The Keep is gone. We have no place to serve. That dragon is destroying any unguarded keeps and has even taken some of the Glory’s bigger ones.  We need a place to be safe. We’ll serve however you want us to, but we can’t go back. There’s nothing left,” he said. 

 

Ursa put her feet on the ground and leaned onto her knees. “Look. you’re my brother. I want you here if you want to be here. But. Can you follow me? Listen to my orders? I call the shots here, even when I don’t want to. You need to be able to do what I ask without questioning me. I don’t have time for your Dalish bullshit. I’m over it. Are you?” 

 

Orion swallowed hard. He knew what she was asking and that she wasn’t kidding. She was harder now. She’d been fighting a war for longer than he’d known it existed. He’d known what they called her but had ignored it. Seeing it was different. She was strong. She’d wiped out a wave of fighters and riders without trying much. She stared him down with bright and calm eyes. She was no longer the girl he’d known and he’d need to be okay with that. Finally, he nodded. She smiled.

 

“Good. I’m sorry about them, by the way,” she said, standing. 

 

“It was a tragedy,” Orion allowed. 

 

Ursa took his arm. “I’ll show you the barracks and the dining hall. Sera’s here too. You can sit with us at dinner if you’d like.”

 

Orion listened to her talk, his mind reeling. All the while Cullen followed them, not speaking but listening. Protecting. 

 

_____

 

THREE more months of training had the riders and fighters nearly ready. Ursa could still break their ranks in a fight but it was tougher. Orion had risen to the occasion of learning and his group of Dalish riders became one of the best they’d seen. Meanwhile, Ursa grew used to a life where she didn’t leave home too often. 

 

Every couple weeks she’d head out with Cassandra or Dorian to help in the countryside but mostly she sent scouts. It felt nice to delegate. She pondered her position at dinner, the room around her loud as people buzzed about.  She watched as Dorian approached Orion for the first time since he’d come to Skyhold. They spoke stiffly, Dorian touching Orion’s shoulder briefly before turning and heading to sit with her.

 

“Where’s your other half?” he asked as he slid onto the bench.

 

Ursa took a sip of beer. “Still working. I convinced him to eat. That was enough.” 

 

“You two have been working non-stop. Why not take a break?” Dorian  asked. 

 

Ursa smirked. “Oh, we do.” 

 

Dorian’s eyes lit with interest. “Oh?” he asked. 

 

Neither of them looked up when Orion joined them. The careful truce between brother and sister was scantily being forged with each passing day but they were far from friends. Ursa winked at Dorian.

 

“Oh yeah. I’ll tell you later. I might actually go...take a break right now,” she said.

 

Dorian watched her stand. “Scoundrel,” he joked. 

 

“Tell that to Cullen. He’s the one who likes to do it in his office,” she retorted. Orion blushed furiously at the words as Cullen shouted at her through their bond and Dorian laughed. She walked away, hips swaying, leaving Orion with Dorian.

 

“She’s different,” Orion said. He’d said as much to his dragon and to his men but it was Dorian who would understand the most. 

 

“Well, gaining the power of a dragon goddess will do that to you,” Dorian reasoned. 

 

“It’s more than that. If it were just the power I’d understand but...she’s comfortable.  _ Happy. _ I thought...I thought she was content before. I know our parents weren’t exactly doting and the Keep wasn’t her favorite place but I thought she’d found peace with it. Seeing her now...how could I have thought she was okay?” Orion pondered. 

 

“Did you really think she was happy before?” Dorian asked incredulously. 

 

“Content,” Orion corrected. 

 

Dorian laughed humorlessly. “She was never happy or content. She was alive. That was it. Your family and your people did nothing to help her. In fact, many of them hurt her. Coming here saved her life. This is who she was meant to be.”

 

Orion nodded. “I can see that. The people here respect her. She’s still the best soldier on the field even with the training she’s been giving us. We misjudged her before.”

 

“I’ll say,” Dorian muttered. He bit into his bacon forcefully. Orion looked ashamed.

 

“I didn’t know how to talk to her. She looked at us like she resented us and I didn’t know how to fix it,” he confessed.

 

“So you didn’t. You didn’t bother to try,” Dorian said roughly.

 

“No, I didn’t. I regret it now. I regret that we all didn’t try harder. I don’t think they meant to make her feel so ashamed. I just don’t think they knew how to handle it,” Orion said.

 

“So go tell her this. Why tell me?” Dorian asked. 

 

“I guess I thought that maybe you could…” he trailed off when Dorian glared.

 

“No. This is your speech, not mine. I won’t be your messenger boy. She’s in Cullen’s office right now. Go talk to her,” Dorian ordered. 

 

“But…” Orion winced so Dorian laughed. 

 

“She wouldn’t seduce him in the office. She was kidding. Go. Talk to her.” 

 

Orion stood and tried to settle his nerves. It was time to heal some of the wounds of the past. 

 

____

 

URSA had thrown Cullen’s reports to the ground and climbed into his lap. She knew he would ask her help to clean the mess later but right now they were both enjoying the break. Their kiss was slow, lazy. After months together they were comfortable. They no longer questioned the other or feared that a single thought would be enough to end their relationship. As Cullen’s hands moved slowly along her back, she massaged his scalp with her fingers. They kissed to remind each other of the future, Ursa smiling into the contact.

 

“There,” she said throatily, touching the coin around her neck, “That’s better. I could feel your tension from in the dining hall.”

 

He slid his his hands to her waist, holding her to him. “You told them I like to take you on this desk,” he chided.

 

“Well you do,” she grinned. He growled low in his throat. 

 

“Careful, Commander,” she teased, “I thought you didn’t want your men to know this about you. We’ve been so careful. Do you want to give up now? It isn’t even dark yet. Anyone could walk in.” 

 

He bit her earlobe in response. She whimpered, her head tilting into the touch. “Oh, you asshole,” she breathed.

 

He sucked gently, pulling her torso more snugly against his own. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she gasped. 

 

“They all know. I come undone at your feet. They all see it. It’s too late to hide. So let them hear it, too,” he said, his voice scratchy as it pressed against her ear. 

 

She moaned in response, jumping when Cullen’s office door opened. She turned on his lap, turning red as she saw Orion in the doorway. 

 

“Oh. Hi,” she said faintly. She didn’t move to stand, instead watching her brother shift uncomfortably in the doorway. 

 

“I wanted to talk to you,” he said stiffly. 

 

“Okay,” she said. She turned back to Cullen, smiling as she tried to smooth down the curls she’d mussed. “I’ll be back in a few. Don’t you dare go back to work.” 

 

“Make me wait too long and you know I will,” he warned. She laughed and stood. Smoothing down her shirt, she followed Orion onto the battlements. 

 

“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” he said. 

 

“Oh it’s fine. Hazard of his office. I couldn’t even count the number of times scouts or soldiers have walked in. We try to keep it low key, but you know. It happens. We’re used to it,” she said. 

 

He watched her out of the corner of his eye. “You seem happy here,” he ventured.

 

She smiled. “I am. I never thought I could be so happy. I mean, I know it’s a war and a lot of that just sucks but the rest of it? It’s good. More than good.”

 

“You mean Cullen,” Orion said, his own smile beginning to lift. He did love his sister. He wished her happiness in every aspect of her life.  

“Yes and no. It’s Dyna and Dorian and Anscomb. Josie, Cassandra, Sera, Bull, Krem, Varric. Even Solas and Viv. It’s Skyhold. This is home. More than the Keep ever was. I think I have a place here. When this is all over I’m going to stay here. Raise my kids here,” she said. 

 

“Kids?” Orion asked, looking at her stomach. She laughed.

 

“I’m not pregnant! I just think it would be a good home. Someday,” she said. 

 

Orion cleared his throat. “I’m sorry,” he said abruptly. 

 

“For what?” Ursa asked, her brow furrowing.

 

“For everything when we were kids. Mom and dad, they weren’t exactly good with you and I didn’t know how to help. But I should have tried. You’re my little sister and I just let you slip away. I didn’t even know you were that unhappy. I told myself you were okay. But you weren’t. And I’m sorry for not knowing,” he stumbled on his words, hoping she believed him. She turned to face him full on, her hair blowing in the evening breeze. 

 

“Look,” she said, “This is my home now. I really don’t want to think about before. It is what it is. You’re here now and I can see you’re trying, which is what matters. I don’t need anyone to save me. Andraste preserve me. I have what I need and I’m doing what I can to keep it safe. Thanks for saying it, though.” 

 

Orion nodded. She hadn’t accepted his apology. He suspected she never would, but it was enough. It would have to be enough.

 

“Go back to your boyfriend,” he said, “I can tell you want to. I need to sleep, anyway.”

 

She nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Thanks for coming to talk to me. I really do appreciate it.” 

 

He watched her skip back up the stairs to Cullen’s office. He stood for a few minutes on the battlements, only turning to go when his sister’s squeal of laughter caught in the wind.

 

_____

 

URSA called her council together six months after she’d left the elven ruins. They’d taken their time getting ready, keeping their eyes on newsreels and Inquisition spy information. Corypheus thought he was safe, that much was certain. Ursa believed it was finally time to go after him and it was time to make that plan.

 

“Is it time?” Josephine asked as they all settled around the table. Ursa nodded. 

 

“Cullen?” she gestured for him to speak. He stepped forward. 

“The troops are as ready as they’re ever going to be. They’ve all gotten stronger thanks to Dyna and Ursa’s training. We’ve seen an expansion in Fade magic that’s been assumed lost to us. We’re ready to go on the offense,” he said. 

 

Ursa nodded to Leliana. The spymaster stepped forward, tapping places on the map as she spoke. “Ever since Calpurnia didn’t drink the waters at the ruins we’ve seen Corypheus in these places. We think he’s been hunting for another source of Fade power but he hasn’t found it. You’ve foiled his plan for a full army of bound dragons and now you’ve taken his source of power. It seems a good time to attack.” 

 

“Those who had moved away from the Glory and are now backing us are very happy to offer whatever they can to our cause. It’s a good time to ask for gifts, Inquisitor. Your social media presence has given you unprecedented access to the masses. Though they continue to try and defame you, you have an overwhelming popularity. Your relationship is a highlight. Your candor on that front has helped a lot. I think if we put out the call, our followers and those who fund us will be more than happy to answer,” Josephine added. 

 

Ursa nodded, her shoulder slouching. 

 

“What is it?” Josephine asked. Ursa shook her head, her lips tight. She feared she would cry if she spoke. She looked at Cullen pleadingly. He nodded. 

 

“She’s just overwhelmed. When this started she didn’t think we’d make it this far. I’m not sure any of us did,” he said. 

 

Cassandra had been waiting quietly behind Leliana but now she stepped forward. “It is thanks to you that I will help the Glory when this is over. I’ll be the new leader of our country’s dragons. You have done appallingly well in the circumstances given to you. Take the time to absorb that. We’ll prepare for an attack. Leliana, where is he now?”

 

Leliana pointed to a spot on the map. “He’s settled here. It’s close to us now. A day’s drive. We could be there tomorrow, if we wished.”

 

“End of the week,” Ursa said, “Get everyone ready then on Friday, we’re moving out.”

 

The council nodded and once more Ursa blinked back tears. Cullen rubbed her back as the others left. She slumped back into him the minute the door closed.

 

“You did this,” he murmured into her hair, “Be proud.”

 

“I will be when this is over. When I have a minute to breath. The worst part is yet to come. You’re going to fight on the front lines. I’m going in with Dyna. If I don’t come out, the world will change for the worse. If I lose you…”

 

He covered her lips with his finger, shaking his head. “We’ll both come back. We have to. I know I’m sending you into the heart of this battle. It terrifies me to think of it and I beg Andraste every day to stand with you because I can’t. I would run in beside you if I could. We will both come back from this. Andraste preserve us, we must.” 

 

She nodded, leaning into his chest. “We will. I will.” 

 

They held each other there for a long moment. They heard people passing by but they couldn’t move. Time was ticking by too fast to stop it. For a moment there was peace. 

 

_____

 

URSA found Dorian, Sera, and Krem sitting on the battlements the next day. They were watching the soldiers get outfitted with their weapons for the fight. She boosted up beside them. Opening her mouth to speak, Dorian beat her to it.

 

“We know what you’re going to say but don’t bother. We’re going with you,” he said. 

 

She looked over at him then at Sera. Krem was nodding. Sera fed Red Jenny a piece of raw meat before nodding as well. 

 

“Why?” she asked. 

 

“We aren’t riders. Not like those guys down there. We came here to help you. Krem and Cecil came here with Bull and he’s going with you. If you think for one second we’re waiting here, you’re crazy,” Dorian said. 

 

Sera nodded. “We aren’t going to ride in with Cullen’s forces, either. That’s not where we’re needed. You need us.”

 

“We came here for you. Except Krem. He came here for money. And secrets,” Dorian said, squeezing his boyfriend’s hand. 

 

“But I’ll stand with you. Boss says you’re the real deal. I see it. Maybe it’s time to be a part of something good,” Krem said. 

 

Ursa smiled a watery smile. Dorian pulled her into his side. “We’re not leaving you just because you’ve found a new family. We’re seeing this through.”

 

“You two know you’re my family,” Ursa argued, hooking her arm around Sera’s shoulder and pulling until she too fell into the embrace.

 

“The family that kills together….however that should end. Am I right?” Sera asked. Ursa chuckled. 

 

“Exactly,” she said. They looked down into the yard where the soldiers were preparing. Ursa took a deep breath. “Exactly,” she repeated. 

 

_____

 

THEY rose at dawn on Friday to prepare. Ursa had grown used to waking with Cullen and their dragons. The six months before had been a reprieve from the war they had been brought together to fight. She woke as the sun was rising and turned off her alarm, rolling to see his amber eyes already watching her. 

 

“It’s today,” he said, his voice rough with sleep. 

 

“Yes,” she agreed.

 

**_“No matter what we’ll all come back here,”_ ** Anscomb said fiercely. 

 

“We will,” Ursa promised. “No matter what, we will.” 

 

They spoke very little aloud as they got ready. Instead, they allowed their minds to open and they shared their thoughts freely. Fear and determination sat at the forefront of most of their thoughts, though love and tenderness passed easily among the pairs as well. When they were ready, Cullen in his armor and Ursa in hers, they kissed roughly and took each other’s hands. They walked to the field as a set. Anscomb and Dyna stood tall next to one another. They were as ready as their riders for the day to come. 

 

They were greeted in the courtyard with grim nods. Ursa tried to ignore the looks of hope the men gave her. She released Cullen’s hand as he stopped next to his men. She looked back only for a moment before moving forward. Ahead of her, her friends waited. Cassandra in her armor. Varric with his crossbow, a small dragon Ursa had never seen before on his shoulder. Sera and Dorian, their dragons beside them. Iron Bull, his dragon curled around his legs and the Chargers behind him. Vivienne, Aleda watching them all. Cole, his form as solid as he could be, his tail swishing along the ground. Even Solas stood with them. They had all proven themselves to her. She nodded at them gratefully. Dyna hummed to the dragons who all inclined their heads in tandem. 

 

“They want to hear from you,” Cassandra said, nodding to the army at Ursa’s back. 

 

Ursa turned. She took a deep breath, catching her brother’s eye in the crowd. 

 

“This has been a long journey. I’ve said it before and I will continue to say it. If you had told me that first day in Haven that we would be here today and that I would stand in front of you like I do now I would have laughed or called you crazy. We’ve seen impossible things. We’ve met gods. We’ve learned about the magics we’ve forgotten. We’ve lost friends and family. Today is the day we take back the world. It isn’t the last day, not by a long shot. After this we’ll need to rebuild. There will be a confused and hurt world left behind. You all need to come home. For your families. For your friends. For the world. Fight for a future that will be worth living. I want a world where those with dragons and those without can live together, not seperate. I want a world without inferiority. I need your help to build it. You’ve seen me do improbable, hell, impossible, things. It’s time for you to follow in my footsteps. May Andraste guide us. May the Dread Wolf stand by our sides. And come tomorrow, may the world begin to heal.” 

 

Her words echoed across the courtyard. When she looked down there was a pause. A single cheer floated across the stones. Then another. Soon the men were crying out. Those who would stay behind cheered. 

 

“They will heal the world because of you,” Cole said, his voice a soft whisper. 

 

“No. they’ll do it for them,” she denied. 

 

Cole watched her back. “Andraste made you for this. Her power runs in your blood. They will heal the world because you gave them this chance.” 

 

Ursa nodded, turning back to her friends. “It’s time. Let’s go.”

 

The army prepared to leave. A new day was on the horizon and they wished to see it. 

 

_____

 

**“THEIR army cuts mine down!** ” Corypheus screamed into the Fade. No one answered. He’d been promised this land. The throne of the old gods had lain empty but a wolf had laid the power at his feet. He had been promised this world but now there was no response, only an echo of his own cries. Corypheus looked at the glowing orb he’d used to help the feral dragons open more powerful rifts. The wolf had given him this gift to help him raze the world. In front of him those very same dragons he’d released from their bonds fell to an army of riders and dragons. Their rift energy couldn’t help them now. Around him, human bonded dragons knocked them down. 

 

**“Where is what I was promised?”** he bellowed. There was no one there to hear him. 

 

_____

 

SOLAS felt his power surge in Ursa’s body. She looked up to the ruins of the Dalish Keep. Around her, her friends defended themselves and their position. She didn’t flinch at the fighting. She’d fought her way to this spot beside them, the blood splattering across the ground no longer bothered her. 

“I’m sure it’s poetic that he chose here,” she commented. 

 

“He didn’t choose this for you,” Solas said. “The magic is strong here. The tie to the Fade is at its highest.” 

 

“I know. Dread Wolf. The Dalish. I get it. Still. Insult to injury. But whatever. It’s time. His gods have abandoned him. Mine have not,” she said. She began to walk up the ruins. They shifted beneath her but she didn’t slip. Dyna followed. They both ignored their friend’s cries. They had to do this on their own. They could feel it. 

 

“Your gods will abandon you when they must,” Solas said to her back. He looked for the glow of his orb. With it back in his hands he could pull his power from her body. With that, he could climb back to his throne and finish what he’d hoped Corypheus would start. He followed her. 

 

_____

 

URSA knew the power that Corypheus harnessed. It flowed through her body too. She stopped at the top of the ruins and looked at the furious dragon. He paced, blowing fire and smoke from his nostrils as he watched his army fall. 

 

“He abandoned you,” she said. 

 

The dragon turned, a sneer crossing its scarred face. 

 

**“He is nothing. I will do this on my own. His power runs in your blood. I wonder, if I spill it, will he come to me?”** Corypheus taunted. 

 

Dyna stepped forward.  **“You had the Dread Wolf. Why did you want me too?”**

 

**“Don’t you see, little one? As you carry both I could have, too. You squander the gifts of the gods on those who are unworthy. I would have given this world back to our kind. To the wolf who cries at the blood moon and to the dragons who scream in the skies. You’ve been spoiled by this world but still, I can use you. I will bind you. Take your rider’s power from her veins. The world will weep with blood. We will be freed,”** Corypheus replied. 

 

Dyna snorted.  **“My father killed my mother. He was crazy. But he was still right about you. You’re insane.”**

 

Corypheus screamed and hurled fire at them. Ursa cried out, diving behind Dyna. She scrambled onto her partner’s saddle, ducking another shot of heat as it blew by her head. 

 

_ “How do we kill him?”  _

 

**_“His power is tied to the orb. Break it and the only power he’ll have will be his own. He isn’t blessed by Andraste. He will fall to our will then.”_ **

 

Ursa nodded.  _ “Get me above him. I’ll knock it from him.”  _

 

**_“That’s suicide. He can heat his skin,”_ ** Dyna argued. 

 

_ “I will end this. Get me over him. I’ll be fine.”  _

 

Dyna snorted but flew. Corypheus met them in the air. His screams echoed over the battlefield. Dyna’s answering cry roused a cheer from the soldiers below them so Ursa smiled grimly. She’d told Cullen she would return. She wasn’t sure if that was the truth. The ground was far below them and the dragon twisted every way, making her worried she’d miss him and simply fall to her death. 

 

_ “If I’m going to die here, I’m going to doing it ending this,”  _ she told herself. With a moment of steely resolve, she shut her connections to Anscomb and Cullen. They both scrambled to re enter her mind but she kept it shut tightly. She would not let them see her fall, not if it was the end. 

 

_ “Don’t let him go mad. If I die, don’t let him fall into despair. Try as best you can,”  _ she told Dyna. A flame flew by her as she stood on the saddle. Dyna cried out as Ursa dove. 

 

_ “Andraste preserve me. Let me live. Let me end this. Help me,”  _ Ursa prayed.

 

“As you wish,”  the answer shivered in her spine. And then the world went green. 

 

_____

 

IN the years to come the soldiers on the ground would tell stories of the battle. The blood, the screams, the falling dragons. But what they would all remember most was the scream of a dragon and a green light bursting across the sky. They all stopped. They all watched. Their Herald, their Inquisitor fell from the sky fearlessly. She pulled the glowing orb from the monstrous dragon’s back. She fell to the ground, a very mortal crash welcoming her to the hard ground. And then she stood, a golden dragon at her back. They opened their mouths. They let out a yell and the Earth shook with it. Corypheus writhed in the sky. The orb shattered into pieces in her hands and the human woman sprouted green wings for a single breath. The men would claim they could see her eyes glow green. On their death beds they would swear that it wasn’t a woman who stood there but a god. A god welcoming a new world of both dragon and human. 

 

_____

 

URSA didn’t know how she’d stood or why she was alive but she was glad of it. The orb had shattered in her hands, Andraste’s help causing the fall of Corypheus. With his power gone, Dyna circled him. Together, she and Ursa cried out, their shared power freezing him in his flight. He fell to the ground with a crash. It took only moments for Cullen’s soldiers to overtake him. Ursa didn’t watch him die. She turned instead to find Solas touching the shards of the orb.

 

“It’s broken,” he said softly. 

 

“I’m sorry. Maybe we can fix it,” she replied, not knowing why it mattered but understanding that Solas was in anguish.

 

“No. It’s too late,” he said, sorrow filling his voice. “It’s all too late.” 

 

“Solas…” she reached for him but he flinched away. 

 

“You took it all. Years of searching for it. So many years of learning. Of ridicule. Of seeing our people on their knees, slaves to a world that didn’t appreciate their past. You took it because I allowed it but now I can’t get it back. If I spilled your blood it would only bleed back into the Earth. You have taken my throne without even knowing what you hold and I let you. It’s too late. There’s no way to fix this. Lead them well, Herald, while you can. I’ll come back for what is mine. The wolf always does,” he said flatly. 

 

Ursa’s eyes widened. “Solas…?”

 

“Tell Andraste I  _ will  _ return home. I hope she missed me. The world will fall as will her daughter. Tell her to prepare. I’m coming on my own this time. Remind her of what I do to those who stand in my way. Didn’t you ever wonder how her partner died?” Solas’s eyes were cold as he looked at Dyna. His lip curled as the dragon snarled. 

 

**“Dread Wolf. He killed our connection to this land. He killed our love for humanity and the ground they walked. He wished to open the Fade not for us but for the elves. For their tie to magic. He wanted the Fade for them. He wanted the dragons gone. Go growl at another. I know your bite,”** Dyna sneered. 

 

Solas turned to leave. He paused, looking back at Ursa. “If this had gone differently, Herald, I would have welcomed you as a friend. I want you to know that.” 

 

Ursa watched him go, too stunned to move. She wondered if she should follow. Beg him for the truth, scream at his lies, kill him. Anything other than just watching him leave. 

 

**_“Let him go. He can’t touch us now. We hold his magic in our blood. You’ve just won a war. Let’s celebrate,”_ ** Dyna said. She tugged on Ursa’s right arm with her teeth until the woman shook her head and then nodded.

 

“Right. Let’s go see our friends.” 

 

_____

 

THE soldiers had been driven out first so Ursa didn’t get to see Cullen when she climbed from the ruins. 

 

“He was a wreck. You closed your connection to him,” Dorian said accusingly. 

 

“I had to. I couldn’t have him telling what I did was stupid,” she said.

 

“Well it was,” Sera reasoned. 

 

“But it worked. It’s over,” Ursa said, a laugh bubbling from her lips as those words settled into her. “It’s over.” 

 

Dorian yanked her into a hug. “Yeah, you idiot. You saved the world. Thanks.” 

 

Ursa smiled, tears in her eyes. “I did, didn’t I?” 

 

“Don’t go getting a big head,” Sera scolded. 

 

“No,” Ursa said, “No, I don’t think I will.”

 

“Car’s waiting!” Varric called, his dragon, Hawke, dancing on his shoulder. Ursa skipped over to him. 

 

“Is this Hawke?” she asked. The small dragon nodded, a red slash across his nose the only offsetting color on his yellow scales. “It’s nice to meet you. By the way, Varric, don’t think I don’t know what they call you two. We’re gonna talk about that later.”

 

Varric clapped her on the back. “One hero set to another. Come on, us prisoners should stick together, don’t you think?”

 

She chuckled and climbed into the car, leaning on Dyna in her exhaustion. She slept through the ride home, the golden glow of a dragon protecting her in her dreams. 

 

_____

 

CULLEN was furious with her but he couldn’t hold on to the feeling. It kept slipping into pride. It was infuriating. 

 

**_“She’s alive. That’s enough,”_ ** Anscomb said in amusement. 

 

Cullen growled unintelligibly at him. He flipped the ring box in his pocket and studiously did not think about the question he was going to ask her when she finally got back. 

 

“They...should be back soon,” Josephine said hesitantly. They were standing on the front steps of Skyhold and had been for the past hour. Cullen hadn’t stopped pacing or muttering since they’d gotten there. He waved his hand in her direction, muttering something about idiots and love. 

 

Leliana rolled her eyes discreetly while Josephine smiled. As the last cars pulled in, Cullen finally stopped pacing. Anyone who wasn’t injured was waiting for the Inquisitor to return. A hush fell over the crowd as the doors opened. The first to exit were Cassandra and Varric. They nodded at the cheers of the crowd. As the rest of the cars unloaded, Cullen stared. When Ursa finally stepped out, a roar greeted her. She looked stunned before smiling, a blush coloring her cheeks. Her eyes sought him out, stopping when she found him. 

 

He could feel her want to run to him. Like that day that she’d crashed into him, she wanted nothing more than to be beside him. She forced herself to walk. She shook men’s hands. Spoke softly to women who stopped her. She even caressed a baby’s cheek when the mother thrust the child out to her. Cullen made a quiet noise of disgust. 

 

“In a hurry?” Leliana asked. 

 

Cullen shifted his weight. He’d managed to keep this secret. He’d pushed it far to the back of his mind and didn’t think of it. He wouldn’t ruin the surprise now, but she needed to move faster. Finally, she reached the stairs. Josephine stepped in front of him and he swore under his breath. Leliana chuckled. 

 

Ursa hugged Josephine tightly before moving on to shake Leliana’s hand. Finally, she was face to face with Cullen. Her smile was unsure. He could feel her mind racing. She knew he was angry at her choices. She was scared he would yell at her but her joy at seeing him wasn’t dampened. 

 

_ “He can scream at me all he wants. We have the rest of our lives to make up…”  _ she thought, their connection open once more. 

 

He looked her over. “You’re an idiot,” he began, watching her wince slightly. “That was the dumbest decision I’ve ever seen you make,” he continued, bending to his knee and reaching into his pocket, “And I’ve watched you jump off of Dyna onto our soldiers claiming it was for “the surprise.”” 

 

“Cullen?” she asked breathlessly, her eyes going wide. 

 

“I am very, very angry with you for closing your mind to me when you thought you might die,” he continued, flipping the small box up and open. “And I look forward to spending the rest of my days reminding you of that when I do something stupid, too.”

 

“Cullen,” she nearly whimpered, her eyes filling with tears. Around them, Skyhold chattered excitedly. He watched her face, a smile softening his features. 

 

“Ursa Lavellan, leader of the Inquisition, the Herald of Andraste, holder of the Dread Wolf’s magic and the love of my life, will you marry me?” 

 

The ring was a simple gold band flecked with dragon stone. He’d had a moonstone added instead of a diamond, remembering her telling him it was her favorite. She stared at it, shock and joy on her face. 

 

“Cullen,” she said again.

 

“This isn’t exactly comfortable in armor,” he joked. “I’d appreciate a yes or no.”

 

“Yes, of course, yes,” she said, tears streaming down her face. He took her left hand and slid the ring onto her finger. It fit her perfectly. Her hand trembled in his own. He looked at the ring on her finger. His ring. She would marry him. She would be his wife. He marveled at the word. 

 

“Stand up so I can kiss you,” she ordered when he didn’t move. The crowd cheered as he surged to his feet and caught her in his arms. Like that day so many months ago, he kissed her there on the steps in front of everyone. The world had been saved and his love was in his arms. He crushed her to him, thankful for her warmth. She clung to him as well. They would help to build a new world and they would do it together. 


	15. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A resolution of the story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I finished it. This was a quick journey that I know I will come back to. There will be more mini stories in this world and maybe someday I'll write the story of Solas' return. Until then, thank you for reading. I hope you enjoyed it!

Chapter 15

 

6 Years Later

 

“DIMITRI Rutherford! When I catch you I’m going to skin you!” Ursa cried over the battlements. She put her hand to her rounded stomach and took a deep breath before tackling the stairs. A giggle greeted her as she headed for Cullen’s old office. 

 

“If you’re playing with your father’s weapons, I swear,” she threatened, pushing open the door to find her husband and her son trying to push the box of cakes under Cullen’s old desk. She froze as they turned, both with wide eyes. 

 

“Cullen Rutherford, how dare you?” she asked, a smile twitching at her lips. He grinned up at her, his curls wild around his face. 

 

“Sera was hoarding them,” he reasoned. Dimitri giggled, auburn curls matching his father’s as he bounced on his toes. 

 

“Red Jenny didn’t even see us coming!” he boasted. 

 

Ursa let her facade drop and grinned at her boys. She opened her arms and Dimitri ran into them. “Naughty boys. Did you at least share with your sister?” 

 

Her 4 year old son beamed up at her. “Nope,” he said cheekily. She gasped. 

 

“Very naughty, indeed. Both of you, march. You owe Sera an apology,” she said. Cullen caught her around the waist from behind, hauling her rounded body back into him. She melted into the hold, helpless as always to his touch. 

 

“Maybe we could convince you not to tell,” he breathed into her ear. She wriggled, unable to believe he could still affect her this much after 6 years. 

 

She turned in his arms, squishing Dimitri between their legs so he squeaked in protest.

 

“That depends,” she said, watching Cullen’s eyes darken at her tone. “Are there any berry cream cakes in that box?”

 

His surprise was lost in a laugh. Stepping back, her husband reached back behind his old desk. He pulled the box up and offered her the selection. She took the cake she wanted and bit into it with a smirk. 

 

“Downstairs. Dinner’s nearly ready,” she ordered. 

 

“Yes, Ma,” Dimitri said, his tone angelic. She rubbed his head, pushing the small boy out of the office ahead of her. 

 

She turned smartly and winked at Cullen. He grinned back, love in his eyes. She closed the door behind her, walking down the stairs and back to her home where her family waited. 

 

_____

 

SKYHOLD had stayed the center of the Inquisition, though the world had been quiet since Corypheus fell. Most of those who had lived within its walls had left. Cassandra had gone to the Glory headquarters as the new head of the organization. She worked with Ursa to exact the change they both wished for the world. She was revered for her work despite her lack of dragon.  Leliana had followed Vivienne back to her liaison job. She still reported secrets back to Ursa when she felt them necessary. She would always serve the Inquisition first. Josephine had stayed but she spent the summer months with her family in France. Varric had gone back to his home with the city Rage. He wrote a book based on their adventures. It had done so well he’d asked Ursa to autograph some of them herself, which she had, asking only that he tell her his and Hawke’s story. He visited Skyhold whenever he could, laughing with Ursa about both of their pasts.

 

Iron Bull and the chargers had left Skyhold months after the war ended, leaving a saddened Dorian behind but it hadn’t lasted. Dorian’s father passed away, leaving his seat to Dorian who denied it but on a trip to Tevinter, the rider met a kind man who followed Dorian back to Skyhold. They had married in the very same gardens Ursa had taken Cullen’s hand in. Their dragons bonded soon after. Now Dorian understood the happiness Ursa had found. They stayed best friend, Dorian being the godfather to Ursa’s children. 

 

Sera traveled back to the rebuilding of the Dalish keep every couple months, proud to be seen as a driving force of the Inquisition. She oversaw the changes, head held high. She still claimed Skyhold as home and helped the cook make cakes whenever she made it back. Red Jenny protected the sweet treats but sometimes fell asleep on the job.  Orion too had stayed. His riders had left once the Dalish Keep could house them but Orion’s truce with his sister had gone from stiff to gentle and he couldn’t give it up. When she’d had his niece he’d been the first one to put her on a dragon. They would never be as close as they could have been, but with time the wounds healed more and more. The last of their family, they decided to stick together. 

 

Anscomb and Dyna bore many eggs. Dyna hatched them each in Skyhold under Ursa’s gentle hands and watchful eyes. When a snowy dragon with green eyes was born she knew it was meant for Ursa’s own daughter. The child, a beautiful auburn haired girl with her father’s amber eyes and her mother’s full mouth, was only 5 at the claiming but she proved herself to be the most powerful rider in Skyhold with each passing day. Anscomb and Dyna spent their time split between the sky and the grounds where most of their children roamed. Their feral genes kept them wild while their tamed side tied them to a home. It was here in the yard that Ursa found her dragon. 

 

“Have they stopped at all today?” she asked, crossing her arms and watching her child fly on the back of her dragon. The snowy dragon, a female by the name of Elis, snorted snow into the air so the girl laughed as it fell. 

 

**“No. Elis won’t fly her too high yet but they both yearn for the sky,”** Anscomb replied. 

 

“Well, they’re both their parent’s children, aren’t they?” Ursa asked with a smile. 

 

Dyna looked at Ursa’s full belly.  **“It’s another girl,”** she said. 

 

“I know,” Ursa murmured. She traced her fingers over her skin there. 

 

**“She’ll be here soon. She’ll fly, too. They all will. Andraste bless us, they will reach the sky,”** Anscomb said. 

 

Ursa smiled. Her daughter waved. 

 

“Come on, Aurora,” she called to the girl, “Dinner’s ready.”

 

“5 more minutes!” the girl pleaded. Ursa shook her head with a laugh. 

 

“Fine, but I’ll send Uncle Dorian to get you if you don’t come in, in 5,” she replied. 

 

Aurora waved again, already back in the air. Ursa turned, sucking in a deep breath. 

 

_ “I’m happy,”  _ she thought as she exhaled.

 

She smiled wider as three voices chorused their approval. In her body another life grew. Soon she would have another daughter. Even sooner she would be sitting with her family. The offices in Skyhold lay quiet. The skies were clear. The world at rest. Without hesitation she headed inside to those she loved. 

 

_____

 

SOLAS felt his magic fracture once more as Ursa bore another life from her body. He shivered, a sneer crossing his face. 

 

“My dear wolf, what will you do? She knows not what she does. Will you kill children for your vendetta? Will you hunt the one who cleaned up your mess?”  Andraste taunted in his mind. He shook her away. 

 

“I will do whatever it takes to get home,” he vowed. He watched the sky. There was a storm coming. He would ride it to her doorstep. Thunder cracked across the sky. “They will know my name,” he said. 

 

_____

 

FIONN was born with her father’s blonde curls. They were fine and downy soft when stroked. Ursa cried upon holding her, Cullen’s kiss pressed to her sweaty brow before he too choked up. When the baby opened her eyes they both gazed back at her in awe. 

 

“Andraste’s fire,” Cullen breathed.

 

“Andraste’s blessed,” Ursa murmured. Her daughter’s green eyes glowed back at her. Ursa looked up only when Aurora and Dimitri burst into the room.  Dorian and Sera had been holding them outside but with Ursa’s cries done with, they knew the baby had come. Her children crowded by her side. 

 

“What’s her name, Ma?” Dimitri asked. His hands looked large next to the newborn’s small limbs. He touched her hand gently. 

 

“Fionn,” Ursa answered, rubbing her nose against the baby’s. “Fionn Rutherford.”

 

“That’s perfect,” Aurora said.

 

“She’s perfect,” Ursa replied. 

 

Cullen nodded, his love swelling in her mind. She leaned back into his chest, smiling softly as his arms circled her waist gently. 

 

“ _ She’s perfect,”  _ he thought to himself. Ursa’s approval washed over him. He kissed her sweaty neck so she hummed. 

 

Anscomb looked at Dyna. They could both feel it.  **_“She will save us all,”_ ** Anscomb said privately to his bond mate. Dyna nodded. 

 

**_“Fionn. A queen to rule the skies.”_ **

 

**_“Andraste’s born.”_ **

 

Somewhere in the distance, a golden dragon laughed. Even farther away, a wolf bared his teeth. But for a moment there was peace and the family relaxed in that. Closing her eyes, Ursa let herself dream. 

 

THE END

 


End file.
